“I know, yo.”
“You might be visiting me in the hospital soon,” Deedee chuckled.
“Oh please, Dee. If she’s up, do not mention anything about you being pregnant. That’d certainly cause her to check out yo.”
“And we both know how much she’d love nothing but to do that.”
“I’m talking really checking out, yo.”
“You mean like… flat line…?”
“Yeah yo. I’m talking that.”
“Okay, I won’t forget,” Deedee said in a serious tone. “And I won’t talk about boys, hanging out…” she added with a wink. “I told you that I’ve been here visiting her before.”
“Yeah, this hospital thing has been a regular revolving door thing with madukes, yo.”
“Hey, Coco there are vending machines over there,” Deedee said, making a beeline for the small snack area.
“Are you that hungry, yo?” Coco asked, following.
“You forgot? I’m eating for two now. Let’s get couple hot chocolates, ring dings, yo-yo’s… anything chocolate,” Deedee smiled.
“You’re trippin’ right now, yo. Let’s just get the hot chocolates. We can eat before we go to the flicks.”
Hospital security waved Coco and Deedee on. Carrying hot cups of chocolate, the girls got on an elevator heading up. They got off and Deedee sipped quietly, trailing Coco. She saw patients as she passed open doors. Deedee imagined being cooped up in a hospital bed and a frown appeared on her face.
When they reached the room, Ms. Harvey was lying with her eyes closed. Heart monitors, a breathing apparatus and tubes were connected to every organ of her emaciated body. Deedee’s jaw dropped in surprise and the cup of hot chocolate slipped out of her hands. It splashed on the white tiled floor. Coco jumped, staring at Deedee. She realized that this was the first time Deedee visited.
Coco quickly handed Deedee her cup of hot chocolate then attended to her mother. She found a small towel and moistened it with warm water. Coco wiped sweat from her ailing mother’s perspiring face. A nurse happened to walk by, and looked in.
“Hi Coco,” she spoke with familiarity. “How’re you feeling?”
“Hey, Nurse Roberts. I’m good, how’s my mom?” Coco responded.
“You are not here at your usual time, I see,” the nurse said. “You’re a few hours late. She was up briefly and has been in and out. She even managed to drink some fluid.”
“You mean she woke up? Wow, that’s good right, Nurse Roberts?”
“Yes it’s always a good sign when the patient regains consciousness. In your mother’s case, it proves that some of the drugs are working. And let’s not forget all the talking you’ve been doing in here at all times of night and day. Every bit helps and goes a long way toward helping with her recovery. Keep it up, Coco. You’ve been in here like clockwork everyday for the past couple of weeks.”
“That was my fault. I sort of took Coco out of her normal routine,” Deedee said.
“I had to meet up with my friend. I’m sorry, this is my friend, Deedee.”
“Hello, Nurse Roberts. It’s nice to meet you,” Deedee said.
“Hi there, Deedee. Let me see how your mom is doing and get back to my rounds,” nurse Roberts said.
The nurse checked Ms. Harvey, and after making adjustments to the machines and tubes, she fixed the bed.
“Well nice to see you Deedee and Coco,” the nurse said, pulling the drapes on the window. “She may wake up for a few minutes. Try not to stay too long, Coco, and stop at the desk before you leave.”
“A’ight, I will. Coco said
“Thanks for the good news,” Deedee said.
“Okay, see you both,” the nurse said, walking out the room.
Coco and Deedee sat staring at the frail woman lying in the bed. They remained silent, and could hear the all life-saving machines humming loudly throughout the hospital. Deedee walked to the window and glanced out at the rooftops of Harlem, while Coco, tears in her eyes, kept wiping at her mother’s face.
Deedee could feel the sadness welling up inside her. She remembered the time that she found out that she had lost her mother. Deedee had never accepted the explanation. She wasn’t even sure about her uncle’s version. Her mother could be alive living somewhere, she didn’t know for sure and no one seemed to care. Funny how someone so important could be gone with so little fanfare. Living or dead, Denise Ascot’s disappearance remained a mystery that seemed to matter only to her daughter.
Deedee walked over to Coco and hugged her best friend. Coco saw tears rolling down Deedee’s cheeks.
“Why are you crying, yo?”
“I’m feeling your pain, Coco,” Deedee said bravely.
Coco squeezed her arms tightly around Deedee’s neck. Deedee reached forward and placed a tender kiss on Coco’s soft lips. They were crying in each other’s embrace only to be startled by the sound of someone clearing their throat. Coco and Deedee were still in each other’s arms, when they heard a distinct voice.
“What’s goin’ on here?”
“Ah… I’m here with Coco and…”
“Oh my gosh!” Coco jumped back in surprise.
It was the first time this had happened and Coco both embarrassed and surprised. Deedee stared wide-eyed at Ms. Harvey’s ghostlike figure rose up and bent forward to look at them.
“So, y’all gots to hug and carry on like y’all need a room or sump’n…?”
The teen girls stared at each other then back at the person in the hospital bed who now seemed to have fallen back asleep. Coco thought of calling the nurse but was stopped dead in her tracks by her mother’s menacing tone.
“Don’t bother callin’ that heffa,” she snapped from her prone position. “Her ass probably too busy eating a damn ham sandwich, and drinking her coffee to even bother with me. That bitch hyper like she wound up when she come up in this room. Makes me scared. The white nurse, she mean and all, but she’s calm and look like she knows what she’s doin’. This one she act like she drunk or hung over and have to drink coffee all night. I tell you speakin’ of drinkin’… Coco, come closer girl lemme holla in your ears…”
Coco timidly moved in the direction of her mother’s bed. The woman was unmoving but her mouth was moving like her mother’s. Because of Ms. Harvey’s inability to eat, the doctors had prescribed intravenous nutrition. The voice was familiar, but Coco found it difficult to recognize the woman lying in the hospital bed.
5
She saw bony, sticklike fingers twitching and beckoning her on. Coco floated like she was wrapped in a cloud, gently moving in the direction of her mother’s bed. Coco’s mind seemed to fail in the surreal situation; it was difficult to grasp what was happening. Then she heard her mother’s voce again.
“Coco, you moving like you nine months pregnant! I ain’t got much time,” Ms. Harvey said.
Her mother’s tone propelled Coco forward. She tried to spring toward the person who had raised her. But Coco felt hazy, and hesitated. She saw Deedee reaching forward to hug her mother. When Ms. Harvey shouted, Coco realized it wasn’t a dream. Everything was real.
“Okay, take it easy now, what’s your name. Um Danielle, or Josephine? Y’all the same,” Ms. Harvey said in a strained whisper to Deedee.
“I’m Deedee, Miss Harvey,” Deedee said loudly.
“Dee, I don’t care. Just don’t lead my daughter astray. Come closer child lemme talk to you a minute. Don’t be hangin’ too much with the likes of that one.”
Coco blinked a couple times confused by her own mother. She thought that medications her mother was taking had caused her to be delusional. Coco was hesitant until she heard her mother’s hoarse whisper.
“Come closer, girl.”
Coco got right up in her mother’s face. She could see the strain the illness had caused. Coco couldn’t hide the pain she felt inside. Suddenly her tears flowed.
“Stop cryin’, so much, girl. I know you got enough street smart to know that that girl is
a dyke…”
“Ma…? Ma, c’mon. You’re embarrassing me.”
“You don’t hear me complainin’ about you,” Rachel Harvey whispered in her confused daughter’s ears.
“What’re you talking ’bout, Ma?”
“Don’t ‘Ma’ me, Coco. I’m your mother you’re not pulling any wool over my eyes, even though they’re half way closed. I still see things, Coco.”
Coco stared in amazement at what her mother was saying then she glanced back at Deedee, who was now sitting quietly on the window sill. She too was wearing an expression of bewilderment. Deedee raised both hands in a gesture bordering complete hopelessness.
“Coco, you don’t have to ask anyone else. Just sneak a taste up in here for your mother, girl. That’s all your mother needs to help her out,” Ms. Harvey whispered.
“Mom, mother all you’re getting is water. You cannot mix alcohol and—”
“You’re in the apartment dirtying it up or you been hanging with your queen? I personally don’t care—”
“Mother! I’ve been in the apartment and I’ve cleaned it up real good. Trust me on that. I want to paint—”
“Paint what? Girl, don’t even waste your time. How’s it going in the record world. One of the nurses told me you all over the news. That’s my daughter all over the damn news but can’t even bring her mother a lil’ sip of sump’n…”
Ms. Harvey’s voice trailed, and Coco stared at her. Her sick mother’s request left Coco speechless. The woman closed her eyes and Coco jumped forward, holding her mother’s weak frame. Rachel Harvey was unresponsive. Coco spotted it, and immediately signaled to Deedee.
“Dee, get the nurse, yo!” Coco shouted.
The panic in her tone hit Deedee. She sprang up from the windowsill and shot out of the room like a speeding bullet, heading for the nurse’s station.
“Use the buzzer, yo!” Coco shouted.
Deedee was already down the hallway. She gently laid her mother down on the hospital bed. Coco tried to tune out the humming noise of the life saving machines. She felt trapped in a strange dream where nothing was working. Ms Harvey had deteriorated to a mindless shell. She was no longer able to control bodily function.
Her emotions got the best of her and Coco started to sob. She was heaving with sadness when she felt a hand gently on her shoulders. Nurse Roberts seemed to be part of what wasn’t working right. A distraught Coco glanced up with big round eyes at the woman dressed hospital blues. The nurse had to pry Coco from her mother, and immediately went to work, checking a stilled Ms. Harvey. After doing quick examination, the nurse glanced at the anguished face of the Coco for a beat.
“I’m gonna have to ask you both to wait outside,” she said, sweating profusely.
“Is she…?”
The question hung while the nurse reached into her pockets and resumed attending to the Ms. Harvey. Deedee rushed to Coco’s rescue, tugging on her best friend’s arm.
“Let’s go outside, Coco,” Deedee said.
“Nurse Roberts! Is she…?”
“We have to leave the room and let the nurse do her job, Coco,” Deedee said.
Coco’s stared back with a trance-like expression and Deedee helped her toward the door. They were exiting the room when two doctors rushed past them, closed the door, and pulled the shades. Coco’s lithe body shook from the slamming sound the door made.
Coco paced up and down the hallway. She paused only to do it again. Under the sympathetic gaze of Deedee’s watching eyes, she continued at it for the next half hour. Coco couldn’t stop and Deedee tried to halt the anxiety.
“You’re gonna wear a groove in this hallway,” Deedee said, catching up to Coco.
“Dee, I wanna leave but I have to hear what’s up with madukes first,” Coco said. “You can go if you wanna. We’ll hook up another time, yo.”
“I’m staying with you, Coco,” Deedee said, joining Coco.
They both paced the hallway, Coco and Deedee walking with their arms interlocked. Deedee in a show of support for her best friend, smiled at Coco. The distraught teen leaned her head against Deedee’s shoulder and tears rolled tenderly from both their eyes.
The girls were in the midstep when they saw the doctors emerging from the room. They hurried and met Nurse Roberts as she exited the room.
“She’s resting stable. But I’m afraid you’ll have to visit tomorrow,” the nurse said.
“Okay, thank you very much,” Deedee said. “Good Night.”
Coco mustered only a nod accompanied by a pained expression on her face. Her mother’s health crisis had sapped all her reserves. She felt the gentle tug on her arm and turned to see Deedee. A loud sigh escaped her soft lips, and Coco held onto her friend. In silence, Coco and Deedee slowly walked to the elevator.
Exiting the lobby, to the cool midsummer evening, the girls quietly walked to the parked car. As Deedee deactivated the security system, without saying anything, both girls got inside. Coco stared silently at the road ahead as Deedee pulled in to traffic. She drove a few minutes before Coco spoke.
“I’ve stayed later at the hospital. Something must be wrong, yo.”
“Coco, maybe and maybe not. The nurse said she was resting. They’ll do all they can for her.”
“I hear you, Dee. But that waiting is killing me, yo. I don’t if she’s gonna make it or not.”
“I know what you mean, Coco. But there’s always tomorrow. And besides you have to take care that you don’t worry yourself to death,” Deedee warned.
Coco glanced at her and saw compassion written on Deedee’s face. There was also a certain confidence that framed the contours of Deedee’s face. Coco stared at her until Deedee spoke.
“I know you love your mother, but you have to love yourself too. For instance, besides the ice cream we had in the park, what else have you eaten all day, Coco?”
“That’s it, yo,” Coco said after several beats too long.
“There it is, “ Deedee said, pulling up alongside a restaurant.
“I get the point, yo.”
It was after nine in the evening that Coco and Deedee walked inside Amy Ruth’s restaurant. They were seated, and in a few minutes, they ordered their meals. The girls dove into fried chicken, ox tail with mashed potatoes, sweet yams, and corn bread. Deedee watched Coco digging in and filling up. They were washing it down with lemonades when Coco spoke.
“Oh wow, that really hit the spot, yo.”
“Yes you can say that again. You look sleepy. Are you tired?” Deedee asked.
“It’s just all that shit with Madukes, yo,” Coco said, wiping her mouth with a napkin. “I mean that shit be buggin’ me out.”
“Don’t let it get the best of you, Coco.”
“You know it’s the dumb shit that does. Like every time she’s awake, she always asking for liquor. Madukes be fiendin’ for that liquor, yo,” Coco exclaimed.
“Damn that bad…?”
“I be hatin’ going up in there, yo.”
“Don’t hate it. Just bring her some damn liquor or a bottle or sump’n. Don’t let it bother you, girl. It’ll get the best of you.”
“I ain’t gonna let it get the best of me, yo. I’ll handle madukes and her problem. Thanks for looking out, Dee.”
With the check taken care of, Coco and Deedee walked to the car. Deedee lit a cigarette and offered one to Coco. She declined and sat listening to the music from the car system. Deedee wrapped her lips around the cigarette and sucked.
“I think I’ll have one now, yo.”
Deedee glanced at Coco and smiled then said, “What made you change your mind? I respect the fact that you trying to quit. Too much going on for you to quit, huh, Coco?”
“Nah, I don’t think it’s that. I think that you make smoking look soo cool, yo.”
“Coco, I swear you’re the zaniest—”
“Let’s go catch that flick, yo.”
The car pulled away, joining the flow of traffic heading downtown. Deedee guided the car w
hile Coco lit the cigarette and bobbed her head to the music of Beenie Siegal.
I still close my eyes, I still see visions
Still hear that voice in the back of my mind
So what I do? I still take heed, I still listen
I still paint that perfect picture,
I still shine bright like a prism
6
Eric Ascot sat eating dinner with his attorney, Max Roose in a crowded midtown restaurant. He took his time chewing on the facts that Roose, a slick-talking attorney was providing regarding the upcoming trial. Eric wanted to rid himself of this inconvenience and the attorney assured him that it was possible.
“It’s gonna be an expensive stunt, but it can be done,” Max Roose said, fingering his groomed mustache. “We’ll have to wait and see what type of concrete evidence the state can come up with. They’ll have someone who will testify that you planned these murders with Busta. Anyone you might know?”
“No, I mean only this crack-head who lives uptown—”
“Do you know this crack-head’s name?”
“Yes, I don’t know his real name, but he goes by something like Rightchus—”
“Do you know how we can reach him?”
“No, but I’ll find out and let you know,” Eric said, pausing.
He resumed eating his steak while Max Roose pulled out a pad, jotted down a few quick notes, and returned to his barbecue chicken.
“That information may prove to be vital. Also do you remember talking to anyone while you incarcerated?”
“No, I wasn’t a very social person. Why?”
“Well it seems that besides your former fiancée, there’s someone else out there whose testimony the state is relying on heavily.”
“I don’t know any such person. Everyone who seemed to be connected to this case has been killed. This is crazy ’cause despite that, someone is still making attempts on my life and endangering the lives of people around me,” Eric said.
His frustrations echoed in his tone. He seemed on the verge of yelling, but Eric remained calm. Instead he swallowed a glass of red wine and followed quickly with another. Max Roose continued to eat, watching his client.
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