Caught Between Worlds (The In-Betweens Book 3)

by Alison L. Perry

  Mom was in the kitchen when we walked in. She looked up from the paper and smiled, though it didn’t reach her eyes. I could tell she was troubled and I guessed Dad had filled her in.

  “Morning, girls. Harper, how are you feeling? You look better.”

  “Thank you, Mrs.… Mom. I do feel better. A lot.”

  Molly’s eyes widened when Harper said “mom” and she shot a questioning look my way. I shrugged. I didn’t get it, either.

  “Good. Are you hungry?”

  “Yes,” we all chorused.

  “Can we make pancakes?” I added.

  “Of course. We should have all the makings for that.” She stood and carried her coffee cup over to the sink. “I was reading in the paper the Homecoming parade and dance were canceled due to last night’s events.”

  We all looked at each other and I couldn’t stop the grin sliding across my face. “That’s gotta kill Kitty. She won’t be able to flaunt her royal self now.”

  Molly actually cackled, reminding me of a witch hatching an evil plan. “That’ll show her.”

  “Girls, that’s not nice.”

  “No, it’s not. But she’s not nice, so fair’s fair.”

  Mom shot me her special warning look. “Molly, you know where everything is. Why don’t you show Harper and y’all can get started. I need to talk with Sadie.”

  The tone in her voice indicated she wanted to discuss more than my manners. My suspicion that she knew about the program and Dad and Pen grew. Taking a deep breath, I followed her out of the kitchen and into the living room. I sat on the couch and watched as she paced in front of me. Tears glistened in her eyes as she floundered around for words. Understanding the complexity of everything, I stayed quiet, giving her time to collect her thoughts.

  After making a few rounds of the coffee table, she came to sit beside me. Her hand found mine and she squeezed it hard, a sense of desperation seeping through her fingers and into me.

  “Honey, I know about the program.” She paused a couple of seconds. “I mean, I knew.”

  There it was. The words I’d been unknowingly hoping she wouldn’t say. I felt like I was strangling, my body going numb as anger and hurt bubbled through me. She watched me closely, warm concern pooling in her eyes. It sounded like a swarm of hornets had made a nest inside my ear, a buzzing so loud I couldn’t focus on anything else. She was saying something to me, but the words were so far away I couldn’t make them out. I was in a tunnel of hurt. Surrounded on all sides with betrayal. I tried to focus on her voice, a pinpoint of sound slowly cutting through crashing waves of fury.

  “Sadie. Please, let me explain. Are you listening?”

  I shook my head slightly as if trying to dislodge water from my ears. “I’m listening.”

  Her shoulders slumped with relief. “Sweetie… oh, this is so hard. I had hoped we’d never have to tell you or Nate or the twins about this.”

  “Well, it looks like that plan was shot to hell.” I was feeling snarky, vengeful.

  She stiffened. I never talked to her like that. “Sadie, don’t take that tone with me.” She clung to her authority as my mother, but I wasn’t having it.

  “I think after everything me and my friends have gone through because of the program, I can take any tone I like.”

  My hand was free as she let go and pulled away. Her eyes roved over me, taking me in from head to toe. I let all of my confusion, hurt, anger—everything—show. There was no more hiding it from her. I was a sixteen-year-old going on what felt like sixty. She needed to see it.

  And she did. Very quietly, she murmured. “You’ve been through so much. Dad told me last night, but I thought perhaps he’d been exaggerating it.”

  With a brittle voice, I snapped back. “Why on earth would he exaggerate the fact that Harper and I are in mortal danger. That we just discovered we’re sisters of a sort. That we’ve been through car accidents that weren’t accidents and explosions that were meant for us! I don’t know who to trust. I don’t know who even knows about this! And now Pen—a First—tells me that she needs my help to warn any other potential victims.” I stopped to catch my breath. “I mean, come on, Mom. You don’t exaggerate something like that. Don’t be so naïve.”

  Silence fell between us. Part of me was furious at both of my parents for being involved in this. Part of me was hurt and outraged that neither of them had ever suspected I’d been used as a test subject—especially after all the vomiting up blood, slow healing, and clumsiness. Not to mention I didn’t even look like them. And then there was another part… a big part… that saw their fear and worry and concern for me. That part of me wanted to curl up in their laps and snuggle in close for protection and love.

  At last, she spoke. “You’re right. All of it. Dad and I were so eager to put that part of our life behind us, I think we let ourselves be blind. It was easier that way. But it wasn’t right.” She stroked a finger across my short hair. “You’ve grown up so much the past few months. You’re stronger. Tougher.”

  “I had to be.”

  “I know.” Her voice was low and I heard the tears trying to claw their way out.

  I sighed. “Mom, I know you’d never wish harm on me or anyone else, but—”

  “You feel betrayed.”

  “Well… yeah.” I turned to look directly at her. “I don’t know who is behind all this. I have suspicions, but that’s all so far. Just theories. I need to know that I can trust you and Dad. It’s hard enough trying to be ready for the unknown. Please don’t be part of that unknown. Please.” I was pleading, begging. Suddenly, I noticed my cheeks were wet from tears snaking their way down my face. There was a cold, tight ball in my chest where my heart was supposed to be and nausea rolled through my stomach. All my senses were screaming for relief. For help.

  The look on her face broke my defenses. She held her arms out to me and I fell into them, sobbing. We sat that way for a while, her rocking me and rubbing my back like she did when I was a little girl. I leaned my head on her shoulder and let myself be comforted. Her warmth slowly worked its way through me, thawing my heart, easing the icky feelings. I was transformed into a child whose fears were calmed in only the way a mother could do.

  I felt another hand on my hair. Startled, I turned and looked into Dad’s sad eyes. “I promise, Sadie, we’re not part of the unknown. We have no other secrets.” His breath caught in his throat. “I’m so sorry. We’re so, so sorry you found out the way you did and that you’re caught up in this now.”

  His sincerity reverberated through me. I knew he meant it and I cried fresh tears of relief. The tiny sliver of fear that I’d have to battle my own parents dissolved and I was happy to let it go.

  When I could I speak again, I bit the bullet and voiced the question I’d been mulling over. “Dad, why… how could you manipulate people like that?” I held my breath as I waited for his response. Several expressions crossed his face. He and Mom exchanged glances and a new wave of fear washed over me. What was he going to say?

  He looked at the ceiling and shifted his feet before taking a deep breath. “Sadie, there was a time when I believed in what The Nursery was trying to do. I couldn’t see any bad in creating a race of vampires who didn’t suffer from weaknesses. I believed in the research and the cause.” He passed a hand over his eyes before continuing. “But the more unpredictable the outcomes became, the more I started to rethink my position. And the pressure from the higher-ups became enormous. The longer we ran the experiments, the more humans were out in the world with side effects that could one day lead them back to us.”

  “Like Harper.”

  “Yes.” He looked me straight in the eye. “Once I started watching and interacting with some of those subjects and saw the confusion those human families were dealing with because of their children’s anomalies, my viewpoint changed. I became less eager to do my work.” He stood and poured himself a drink from the bottle of scotch he kept on the bookshelf. “I was relieved when management decided to shu
t down the program. I was debriefed and moved to my position now. I thought it was over and it would just… go away. Like your mom said—I was listening from the hallway—our eagerness to put it in the past helped us ignore what was going on with you. I refused to see it. We both did.” He downed his drink and twisted the glass in his hand. “I wish none of this had ever happened.”

  I nodded. I believed him. But I still had questions. “So, you never suspected I had been… tampered with?”

  “Mostly, no. But there was a small part of me that knew something was off. And that it wasn’t natural.”

  “But you didn’t do any digging to find out?”

  Mom spoke. “No. I knew what he struggled with, but neither of us wanted him to unbury things we thought better left alone. Besides, you were managing, so we just…”

  “You let it go.”

  Tears welled up in her eyes. “Yes.”

  Her admission made me consider what they’d done. It was wrong. But I could see how torn up they were about it now. I believed they truly didn’t mean to harm anyone in all this.

  “So, since you never went searching for answers, you didn’t know anything about Harper, either?”

  Dad gave a sad smile. “No, honey. Not until you told me.”

  I turned back to Mom. “And that’s why you told her to call you mom. Because in a way, you are her mother.”

  She nodded, too overcome with emotion to speak.

  “Nate and the twins don’t know any of this, either?”

  “Absolutely not. Like I said, we hoped this would never come up again.”

  I watched them, trying to put myself in their shoes. What would I have done? My parents were full vampires. Vampires weren’t known for being concerned with humans. Maybe my moral issues with this were because of my human side. Maybe if I had been full vampire, I would have thought the same way. There was no way to tell. But what I did know was they weren’t out to harm anyone. I had to give them some credit for that.

  I sighed. “Thank you for telling me all this. It helps me understand your position better.”

  Mom hugged me, and as I glanced over her head at my dad, I saw a mixture of pain and pride on his face. He seemed upset about his role in all of this, but it was obvious he was impressed with me in some way. I smiled at him, not 100 percent ready to forgive completely, but not as angry anymore. It was going to take a lot of time to heal all the wrongs between us.

  I pulled away. “I need to get back to the girls. We don’t want Molly burning down the house.” Hopefully, my lighthearted tone would sidetrack them from their serious mood. I didn’t want them lingering on this and had every intention of dealing with things as much as possible on my own. There were enough people in harm’s way as it was. I wasn’t about to involve them any further if I could help it. Things might be a little rocky between us, but they were still my family.

  Getting to my feet, I gave them one last smile before going back to the kitchen. I’d have to be careful going forward. If they found out I wasn’t including them, they wouldn’t like it. They wouldn’t like it at all.

  CHAPTER THREE

  I sat in my dad’s car at the park, waiting for Kade to show up. I was meeting him alone, despite Molly and Harper’s rather vehement objections. We’d argued for over an hour, and eventually I got my way, but not before I promised to check in with them no later than 8:00 p.m. I glanced at my watch. Kade and I had arranged to meet at seven, and it was five till. Nerves churned in my gut and I gripped the steering wheel with sweaty palms. I hoped I wasn’t making a huge mistake.

  A rap on my window startled me. I looked up and met Kade’s eyes with my own. How did he sneak up on me? I covered my surprise and put my game face on. It was time to get some answers.

  He opened the car door and I stepped into the twilight. Crossing my fingers that he couldn’t see me shaking, I cleared my throat. “Hi.”

  “Hi to you. So, you’re finally going to talk to me, huh?” His tone was undecipherable, putting me more on edge. I caught a whiff of his soap and shivered. Memories shuffled through my mind and I had to work hard to keep from closing my eyes.

  “Yes.”

  He studied me and I shifted. Butterflies erupted in my stomach as I waited for him to say something. Birds chirped, a cool breeze caressed my cheeks, and time stretched out between us. When I was about to chicken out, he spoke. “I guess it’s safe to say you’re with that other guy now?”

  I closed my eyes briefly, sorry that we were starting out with this topic. He stood there waiting for me to say something. While I tried to figure out how I wanted to answer the question, I thought about how perfectly handsome he was. Too perfect. I could see it now and was embarrassed I’d ever fallen for his act. Images of Cam flooded my mind. His sideways smile, the way he looked at me, the rich deliciousness of his laugh. The corners of my mouth lifted. “Yes. I’m with Cam. I think we both know being with you was impossible.” I hesitated but forged ahead. “Our differences and all. Oh, and the fact you completely lied to me.”

  Something like regret passed across his features, but it didn’t last long. He nodded slightly, so imperceptible I barely caught it. “I did.”

  At least he didn’t dispute it. I couldn’t deal with another round of his excuses and explanations. To simply leave it at the core truth was the best thing. I nodded back to show I heard and agreed.

  He gestured to the trees. “Want to go for a walk while we talk?”

  I laughed and it sounded brittle to my own ears. “Um, no. I remember our last trip into the woods all too well.” He grimaced at my bluntness but dropped it.

  “Okay, then we’ll stay here.” He glanced at the moon peeking out over the trees. “I want you to know I wasn’t behind the accident at the school.”

  “Accident?” I was incredulous that after all the lies, he was feeding me one more. “Really?” I put every ounce of sarcasm into that one word.

  He sighed and shifted his feet restlessly. “Incident. Anyway, I was there to warn you about it. To make sure you were safe. I do care about you, Sadie. Even if I’m not supposed to.”

  Not supposed to? What the hell does that mean?

  “What?” I held a hand up before he could answer. “No, we’ll come back to the caring about me part later. But, first, you’re saying you knew the stands were rigged to explode?”

  “Yes.”

  “But you didn’t do it.”

  “No.”

  I was getting irritated with his cryptic answers. “Do you know who did it?”

  This time he paused before answering. “Yes.”

  I waited for more, but he stayed quiet. Anger fueled me. “Well, who was it? You can’t tell me you knew about the danger I was in… am still in, tell me you know who did it, and not tell me who it is!” Using his own words against him, I continued. “Seeing as you care about me, I would think you’d want to give me all the information you can so I can protect myself!”

  He snapped back. “It’s not as easy as that!” He kicked some gravel scattered around our feet. “I’m walking a fine line here, okay? I’m trying to keep you safe without giving myself away, too. I told you that once before, but you didn’t want to hear it, remember?”

  I ignored that last part, instead focusing on his suggestion that he was in trouble, too. “Giving yourself away to who?”

  “I can’t say.” I opened my mouth, but he cut me off. “Look, there’s a lot you don’t know. And I’ll get around to telling you, I promise. But I can’t right now. Please believe me on that.”

  I didn’t know what to think, but I despised the sincerity in his voice. The last thing I wanted was to feel sorry for him. I didn’t want to ease up on him. But he’d always had a way with words that made me want to believe him. Against my better judgment, I softened my tone. “Then what can you tell me?”

  “I’ve been used. Pressured into doing things I didn’t want to do. And when things got too far, I refused. So, they’ve called in someone else.”

&nb
sp; There were so many questions I wanted to ask, but not enough time to voice them all right now. I focused on his last statement. I thought about the strange guy in the hospital parking lot. “Someone about our age?”

  He looked startled, a rarity for him, and a small spark of pleasure burst within me. “Yeah… how did you know that?”

  “Because I think I caught a glimpse of him the other night, watching me and Molly and Harper.”

  At the sound of Molly’s name, he visibly flinched. My pleasure intensified. I had him in an uncomfortable spot and it was nice to be the one on top for once.

  “Look, about Molly… it’s the same deal. I want to help, but if I do, I’ll only make them more suspicious. It’s better if I don’t do that.”

  I couldn’t resist. “Better for you or for us?” As soon as I said it, I regretted the jab. I was being petty. Not a pretty look on anyone. “Sorry. Don’t answer that.”

  He slipped his hands into his pockets and rocked back on his heels. His voice was soft. “You’ve gotten stronger.”

  Stronger? Could he see it? “What do you mean?”

  “When we met, you were meek. Cautious. And now… well, not so much. You have a spark of fierceness. Not to mention your physical strength. When you attacked me, you really caught me by surprise.” His lip quirked. “I don’t think you’d be scared of Jill anymore.”

  I chuckled, darkly amused at the thought. “No, she doesn’t concern me. If anything, I owe her.”

  “Oh yeah? How you figure?”

  “Let’s just say humans have their fair share of mean girls, too.”

  “Ah.”

  He said nothing else, but I knew there was more. I decided to be blunt again. “What can you tell me, Kade? You’ve gotta give me something.”

  Pursing his lips, he scanned the horizon above my head. “The guy you saw. Be careful. I know him and he’s ruthless. He won’t let feelings get in the way. If he even has any.”

  Chills ran down my spine at the hint of fear in his voice. I’d never seen him scared before. The shadowy figure in my memory loomed large. If this mystery guy could spook Kade, how did I think I’d be able to stand up to him?