A Shot in the Dark

by L. J. Stock

  “How can I make this better, Garrett?” I asked, forcing my hands to stay where they were in my lap.

  “Give me those fourteen years with my niece back.” He opened his eyes and looked at me, anger draining from him. “We were told she died that night. We weren’t allowed to see you, to see how you were doing. The hospital forbade it. My mom… Jesus, she died never knowing that she had a granddaughter.”

  He looked up at me, but I knew my face had given something away when darkness passed over his eyes, and his mouth fell open in disbelief. I shook my head and tried to find the right words to explain, but he’d already put the pieces together for himself, and he looked sick about it.

  “Mom knew?”

  I nodded, rubbing my thighs. “She came to see me when I got out of the hospital. I was packing myself up to leave town because I was so scared about what was going to come next. She encouraged me to go. I think she understood that staying would ruin me. I couldn’t exclude her from Holly’s life though. She got every scan image and photograph I had, right up to the day she died. Her only request to me was to keep the lie.” I started crying, the tears sliding from the corners of my eyes and leaving tracks down my cheeks. I hated myself for the emotional outburst, but there was no stopping it now. It was a dam: unstoppable and free-flowing. “She thought your dad would do something stupid out of anger or spite and you would follow his lead. She understood that Dustin loved me because he’d told her everything... except about the baby because he didn’t know about her. Suzanne was trying to protect you and your dad as much as she was trying to protect Holly and me.”

  “And you didn’t think we deserved to know?” he demanded.

  “I was scared, Garrett. I hadn’t even graduated high school, and I had a baby whose father had been murdered by my dad. Suzanne’s plea just made sense to me. Holly was conceived out of love, and I wasn’t going to lose her. Not to you, to the state, or anybody else for that matter. The idea of someone else knowing became less terrifying with the years piling on top of one another, but the more time that passed, the less I thought I was hurting anybody else. Then I met you, and I had no idea who you were, so I instigated my normal dating protocol. I needed to know how I felt before I introduced you to my daughter. You can’t blame me for that.”

  He looked defeated when I finished, his head shaking in denial as he thought about what I’d said. Maybe he did understand, even a little, because his face fell, and he took several slow blinks before turning his head back in my general direction.

  “My mom knew and kept it from us. You, I almost understand, but my mom…” That burning agony flared in his tone again, and my heart hurt for him.

  “I think she was more worried about your dad, but I got the impression she thought you’d tell him if you knew, so she just let it go. She let you believe the implications, never confirming or denying the rumors about the baby… about Holly.”

  “How could you know that? Did she… she talked to you?”

  “She did. Once a week, until the week before she passed away.” I blinked another set of tears free at the memory. I’d really liked Suzanne, and her death had left me in an emotional mess. Jen had come to tell me in person when she’d heard the news. She’d looked after Holly when I’d fallen apart and put myself back together again.

  “Jesus fucking Christ.” Garrett rubbed his face and looked at me again, studying me with less anger and resentment. Understanding snuck into the corners of his eyes before he blinked it back and left me unanchored again.

  The silence grew between us in the cab of the truck while the insects hammered out their summer chorus beyond it. I wanted to make him feel better. I wanted to take his pain away, but I knew anything more I said would just make the situation worse.

  He was right. I had kept his niece from him for fourteen years. I had continued the lie his mom had started, and only I could accept responsibility for that. I hadn’t known the man he was. I just knew what I’d been told, and I had been okay with keeping him away from us in the name of protecting Holly. There was no way of me knowing he had a good heart and a kind nature, and that was because he’d kept to himself the past fourteen years. Not even Megan or Jen had known who he was from looking at him.

  “I would like to get to know Holly,” he finally said calmly, his eyes meeting mine. “I want to spend time with her, and I really don’t want you to go, Kay. I’m angry as fuck with you right now but I… I want you to stay.”

  “We are… staying, I mean,” I said, dropping my head against the rest and staring out over the field. “You need to know that everything I do is to protect Holly, Garrett, and I just wanted her to have the time to get used to the idea of having an uncle before I told you about her. But she made that choice for herself today, and I’m glad that she did. I want to stay here, too. I want to be here where we’re both happy.”

  “What about Libby?” he asked, his tone less angry with every question he fired at me.

  “She has nothing to hold over me anymore. She can try and make my life miserable, but I’m not letting it happen. We know who we are now, and you know that Holly exists, so I have nothing to hide.”

  “No more surprises?”

  “No more surprises,” I echoed.

  Garrett stared at me for the longest time. I could see his jaw twitching as he seemed to consider everything we’d spoken about. I knew that if I’d had any idea how amazing this man was before now, I wouldn’t have kept Holly away for so long, but my life had taken me somewhere else, and I hadn’t known that the man who was supposed to hate me would become the man I loved. I wasn’t sure what Garrett saw on my face as he studied me, but lifting the center console to make the seats into a bench, he slid closer. His hand released my seatbelt from its cradle, and he leaned forward to ease it back into place.

  “Now to talk about us,” he said, pulling his hand back from the door and cradling my neck. His thumb nudged my jaw so I was looking up at him. I met his eyes with a measure of surprise, my stomach flipping merrily as his face moved inexplicably closer to mine.

  “You don’t hate me?” I asked in a whisper.

  “No, darlin’, I don’t hate you,” he spoke gently, easing me into his lap. “I think I’m still crazy in love with you.”

  I turned, my forehead meeting his as I sucked in a deep breath and held it there. I released my breath and let the words fall out with it. “I love you, too.”

  Garrett pulled me so tight against him, I grunted, a small giggle following the sound as his breath bathed my neck. I brushed my hands through his hair and stayed in his embrace. My humor dissolved as reality settled in, however.

  “Garrett?” I said quietly, rubbing my skin against his.

  “I’m not sure I like that tone,” he whispered.

  Resting my elbow on his shoulder, I propped my head up on my hand and studied his face. “Before we decide anything about us, we need to talk to Holly. You’re her uncle. Don’t you think that’s going to be tough for her in school? You and I both know what little bastards kids can be with ammunition like that.”

  “Ah,” he said, reaching up to run his thumb over my bottom lip. “Holly and I had a conversation, and I may have brought that up. I was pissed at you and making excuses. I…”

  “What did she say?”

  “I think you need to ask her that.”

  “Really?”

  Garrett smiled and raised both of his eyebrows. “I don’t want you to think I had any kind of influence there. She’s smart, too smart for her age, really. I just wasn’t sure what you would think about it.”

  “Now you’re scaring me,” I said with a nervous laugh, shifting back from him farther. He seemed resigned that the sex he’d been mentally planning was now going to be put off as he sighed and shook his head with humor.

  “Let’s go and get Holly, then the three of us can go for a ride and really talk.”

  I didn’t have to think too hard about that proposition. A quick glance at the clock told me she would
be coming toward the end of her riding lesson and the timing would be perfect. Garrett’s idea of a ride, however, told me that he’d already figured a path to Holly’s heart, and mine, by thinking of something the three of us could do together. I’d definitely underestimated him, but I wouldn’t be stupid enough to do that again anytime in the future.

  Chapter Forty

  I watched Holly’s jaw drop the moment we pulled up to Garrett’s house. I’d only ever been there at night, and I had to admit, the place was pretty impressive in the daylight. His house was more than a simple ranch house. It was stunning. The facade was made of wood and stone, which made it charming. The wood had been stained a deep mahogany, while the stones were light, complimenting the darker wood perfectly. The landscaping was gorgeous, too. The design framed the house, accentuating both the stone and wood and it even had some of the same stone and wood tied in to make planted and flower beds so the whole thing was one flowing line of sight. As we passed the house to head to the barns, I could see his backyard. The huge pool had a slide and grotto tucked into a pile of boulders, which incorporated some of the scrubby plants that were found naturally out in the plains of the panhandle.

  Holly’s whispered wow from the back seat wasn’t missed, and I could see Garrett’s small smile of appreciation for his hard work.

  I’d always thought there was only one red barn that sat on his property. I’d only seen one light shining in the darkness when we’d pulled up to his house, after all. But as we pulled up, I realized just how wrong I’d been. There were four of them. All laid out side by side with horses heads peering out as we pulled up, curious who had come to see them. As Garrett drew to a stop, two border collies came rushing toward the truck, not bothering to wait for him to open the door. The smaller of the two leaped easily in through the window and dropped herself into his lap like it was the most natural thing in the world.

  “Can I touch her?” Holly squealed, unclicking her seatbelt and squeezing through the gap between the front and back seat in one smooth movement.

  “Sure.” Garrett laughed, rubbing the dog with affection on the sides of her neck. “Cuervo, this is Holly and Kay. Can you say hello?”

  The dog’s mouth fell open, her tongue lolling out as she lifted a paw in greeting, which only excited Holly all the more. She fell forward, her laughter flowing easily as she took the dog’s paw in her hand and shook gently. “Very pleased to make your acquaintance, Cuervo.”

  A whine came from outside the door, and Garrett rolled his eyes before opening his door and whistling once. “Come on then, old man.”

  As though she knew what was coming, Cuervo moved, shifting herself into my lap with no hesitation as she watched the other dog bounce twice before completing the leap into the cab of the truck.

  “This,” Garrett said happily, “is Jose.” He looked over to Holly who was hanging over the seat gleefully. “This guy will be your best friend. All he wants is belly rubs and cuddles. Call him to you.”

  “Jose,” Holly sang out, sitting back in the seat and patting the space next to her. “Come on, boy.”

  As promised, Jose hopped over the seat to the spot she’d been patting, circled twice, and collapsed with his head in her lap, his eyes flicking to Garrett’s as though asking where they were headed. Holly melted, her heart in her eyes as she bent and buried her face in rough of his neck, all the while making cooing noises of affection. I almost felt remiss that I hadn’t ever broken down and got her the dog she’d always wanted, but the time hadn’t been right, and I’d amended that by having Megan bring Kenny with her when she visited. He’d always loved the long mountain trails we’d walked.

  My eyes flicked to Garrett, who was watching the two with a huge smile on his face. He seemed almost as content as Jose was as he flipped to his back in an invitation for Holly to rub his belly.

  “Match made in Heaven there,” I said, my own hands running through Cuervo’s fur easily. “How long have you had these two?”

  “Jose I’ve had for six years. He was actually named after one of the ranch hands who was killed in a car wreck one winter. Cuervo is his daughter, and she’s two. I bred him a couple of times in the past and once, the litter was a big one. Cuervo was just so full of life, and when they gave me the pick of the litter, she came bounding up, scrambled into my lap and bared her teeth at her siblings when they dared come close to me.”

  “So you named her Cuervo?”

  Garrett spread his hands before leaning forward and rubbing under the dog’s chin. “I may have been going through a tequila phase.”

  Giggles came from the back seat as Jose squirmed and licked Holly’s hands.

  The dogs followed us as we got out of the truck. Jose trotted faithfully beside Holly, seemingly content that she was walking with her hand on his head, while Cuervo circled and herded us toward the barn where people moved around carrying buckets of feed, hay, and tack from stall to stall. It looked like a well-oiled machine. Garrett cut through the moving bodies with small nods of acknowledgment and his usual sarcastic comments to people as he passed them, but he didn’t linger. Once we were out of the barn, there was three more the same size as the first, but it was one that was half the size that sat on the other side of a fenced-in pen that he headed toward, laughing as Cuervo raced ahead and jumped at the door. She did a side flip and sat restlessly waiting for us to join her.

  “This is where I keep my horses,” he explained as Jose trotted off to join Cuervo, and Holly’s arm slipped through mine. “Cuervo has a love affair with my sable mare, Angel. They’re inseparable.”

  “What kind of horses are they?” Holly asked excitement emanating from her now.

  “Four of them are American Quarter Horses, but I have one Arabian. A rescue group approached me about her. I take in some mistreated horses and rehabilitate them. I normally adopt them out to families who will love them, but I fell in love with her. I call her Sassy Pants because she had major attitude. Holly, you’re going to be riding her today.”

  “Really?” Her eyes widened even farther. I was beginning to worry they would fall off her head if this continued.

  “Yup. You ever put a saddle on a horse before?” Garrett asked, unlatching the door and pulling it open. The smell of horses, hay, feed, and leather all collided as they hit my senses. It was an almost pleasant smell even in the path of the huge fans that were aimed at each of the stalls. Five heads peered out from the stalls, and I could see there were another five beyond that, standing empty.

  “No, sir. I haven’t got that far in my lessons yet. I’ve only had two.”

  “Well, if you’re gonna be riding here, that’s the first thing you’ll learn. You have to pull your weight. Tack up, strip, and wash the horse once you’re done. Make sure they have fresh water, and in the winter, you may have to blanket them.”

  If that was meant to deter my daughter, it didn’t work. She just seemed more involved and excited about what was to come. She’d never been afraid of hard work, and I’d always known I was lucky in that respect. There were nights I would come home from work, and the house would be spotless. If she was committed, the task would have her full attention, and this was something she wanted more than anything.

  Garrett patiently worked with her, the beautiful grey horse, Sassy Pants—she had a nametag on her stall and everything—that he brought out had an amazing stature, her neck curved, and her long, snowy-white mane and tail were wrapped up in intricate braids.

  Holly was in love.

  She listened, she did as she was told, and her eyes flickered to the animal with wonder as she worked. Sassy Pants stood and waited with almost as much patience as Garrett, only occasionally scraping her foot to show her enthusiasm for getting free of her stable. Holly walked her around as Garrett moved toward the Dapple Grey horse, Riley, that he’d picked out for me to ride. He taught me with just as much enthusiasm, only the heat in the look he gave me made the stables feel claustrophobic. It didn’t take him long to saddle his horse, Angel
, and once he was done, he led us outside beyond the barns where the horses in the stalls whinnied in protest at being left out.

  We must have been riding for fifteen minutes, joking about the dogs and horses as we moved, when we fell into a companionable silence and hit a property line fence.

  “Can’t we go any farther?” Holly asked quietly, her gaze lingering on some perfect riding land just beyond the simple fence.

  “Today we can,” he said, an odd laugh falling from him as he looked over at me. “Your granddad owns this meadow. About fifty acres of it.”

  “Fifty acres?” I asked, covering my eyes with my hand and looking off in the direction of the rolling fields. “That would take you up to the highway by my dad’s old place.”

  Garrett nodded, using his shirtsleeve to wipe some of the sweat from his forehead. “Yeah, it backed up onto that land, that’s why he wanted it so badly. I don’t know what he’s doing with it while he’s in prison.”

  “Granddad died,” Holly said, turning her horse to face the two of us. “It’s why we were here over Spring Break. He had cancer, I think.”

  “Jeff died?”

  “You didn’t know?” I asked, quietly surprised.

  “I liked pretending he didn’t exist.”

  “That makes two of us,” I said under my breath. Garrett heard me and smiled, but I was glad Holly missed it. It was a perfect time to tell him that I was putting the land back in his name, but I didn’t. It felt as though it wasn’t the right time. We were having a good day, and I didn’t want to bring up any of the ugliness from the past just yet, and I would have preferred it to happen when Holly wouldn’t be witness to it, which led me to an enlightened thought. “I guess that means no one will complain if we go riding there then.”

  Garrett’s eyes lit up with pride that I’d figured it out as he turned Angel to face me. Glancing down at the dogs, he smiled and gave them a command, the two of them racing back in the direction we’d come from. I guess not knowing what the parcel of land held meant it was better for them than to head into territory unknown that hadn’t been tended to in over a decade, as far as I knew.