A Sweet Life-kindle
Page 177
Some memories, she supposed, left such an imprint on the soul that, while they might recede in intensity from time to time, still never really faded.
As the door at the top of the stairs creaked open, Ellie forced herself to remain still, posed at the window as if she could care less that she was about to see him for the first time since he’d abandoned her. But she couldn’t quite calm the trembling of her limbs as adrenaline, pure and potent, shot through her veins, made her feel ill.
“Thought that was you.” The voice was straight from her memory, and yet still different—just like the shop, showing how things changed and yet stayed the same. A bit lower, huskier than it had been when they were teenagers. Still sexy enough to smash right on through her carefully constructed walls.
Ellie forced herself to take a long, calming breath before painting the slightest of sneers on her face as she turned. She was a grown woman now, not a child abandoned by her first love just when she’d needed him the most.
She was strong. She’d show him how far she’d come, even if it killed her.
“Gabe.” There was no point in being formal, not when she’d once held this man in her arms, had once welcomed him inside of her body. But despite all that, she was proud that she managed to frost his name with just the right amount of disdain. “I don’t recall inviting you in.”
Damn it. Damn it. Since she’d gotten the news of her grandmother’s passing, she’d tortured herself with a dozen ways that this first meeting could go, and in all of them she showed him that she’d moved past hurt, and even past hatred, moving right on into indifference—indifference, and not hate, being the ultimate emancipation, after all.
But with those six little words, she’d shown him—shown herself—that she wasn’t quite there yet. Pressing her lips together to prevent anything else from slipping out, she crossed her arms over her chest and tried her best to appear as if she couldn’t care less whether he stayed or went.
“No, you didn’t.” Dominic Gabriel—Gabe to those who knew him well—might now be clean shaven, with a tidy haircut and a police car, but the smirk he cast her way was the same, a flash back to the boy who’d been all too eager to be corrupted by the town’s only bad girl. He tapped the badge pinned to the front of his shirt, the movement making his biceps flex. “But this did.”
“Even a cop can’t enter a private property without just cause.” Infusing the word cop with just a hint of disdain, Ellie arched her eyebrow and tried to tear her stare away from that rock solid arm. When he caught the direction of her gaze he tilted the corners of his lips up again in an arrogant half smile.
“When Mrs. Gunderson calls from next door to tell me that someone is sneaking around Estelle’s Blooms and that she and her five cats are terrified, that gives me just cause.” Those eyes of his, so bright even in the dimming light, looked her up, then down before settling on her face with an expression that turned it to stone.
And damn it, she could feel her nerves sparking to life everywhere his eyes touched.
“Mrs. Gunderson still lives next door?” Ellie shuddered a bit, remembering the old woman who had been one of the least tolerant of her rebelliousness as a teenager… and that was saying something, since no one in Florence had been particularly tolerant at all. “I would think she’d have recognized me. Since I’ve always posed such a threat to Muffy and Puffy and Buffy.”
Gabe smiled coldly. “Well, you’ve cleaned right up… on the surface, anyway. No more black hair. No spiked leather, no gothic eyeliner.”
You used to love my hair, leather and eyeliner. This was what Ellie wanted to say, but the hardness on Gabe’s face stopped her cold. He seemed… angry? With her?
What on earth did he have to be angry about? He hadn’t been forced from his home, his town… he hadn’t had to struggle through a searing one two punch of loss as a lonely fifteen year old child.
Her resentment of him ratcheted up a notch, and allowed her to grab hold of her cool defiance with both hands. With a raised chin she nodded towards the door.
“Yes, I’ve cleaned up my act. But I’m still Estelle’s granddaughter, and I’m here because she just died. She left me the property, so I’m well within my rights to be here. That should ease Mrs. Gunderson’s concern. So you can go.” Grinding her teeth together, Ellie did her best to keep her voice level, her feelings in check. There was no reason, absolutely none that she should be so upset by seeing Gabe, by having him invade her space. He was a mistake from her past, and she wasn’t that girl anymore.
But when he dared to cock his head and let empathy wash over his features, she felt the revolt inside of her turning her stomach in slow circles. How dare he think he knew what she felt? He’d given up that right long ago, when he’d told her without words that he just didn’t care.
“Didn’t see you at the funeral.” Gabe’s voice was even, no obvious judgment to be heard. But Ellie knew it was there nonetheless, beating at her with invisible fists.
Once, he’d protected her from that silent judgment. She’d have been silly to expect the same treatment now, but still it shook her.
“And that must have been glaringly apparent, with the whole one or two other people who likely showed up.” She regretted the words as soon as they’d left her mouth. She and Estelle had never gotten along, but the old woman had still taken her in, raised her when both her father Joseph and mother Hannah had taken off.
“Ellie. I’m not condemning you. I’m asking why you weren’t here then, but are here now.” Damn him for looking concerned. It was none of his business. Her life, the one she’d forged for herself in the wake of his betrayal, was none of his business.
And still, she found herself spilling her secrets, just as she’d always done. Just one of the things that had sent her, the rebel without a cause, tumbling head first for the town’s golden boy so many years before.
Though this time her confession was colored with angry defiance.
“I always let Estelle know when I moved. But she didn’t note the last one down, I guess. In her paperwork or her will or whatever. The lawyer had a hard time tracking me down. I didn’t get here in time.” Though who had thrown her prickly old grandmother a funeral in her stead, Ellie couldn’t imagine. The town, she supposed.
It wasn’t her fault—she’d been a dutiful granddaughter, if not exactly a warm one, not ever letting the older woman worry about her whereabouts. Not that Estelle would have. And yet Gabe’s words had a worm of guilt eating its way through the lining of her gut.
“Hey. Are you okay?” The impenetrable set of his features softened as he seemed to recognize the signs of her inner turmoil. That big, hard body shifted, those feet in their black boots bringing him several steps closer to where she still stood, by the window.
The movement made panic flare to life. She could pretend that she didn’t care so long as there was space and angry words between them. But if he touched her… if he came close enough that she could make out that smell that was so uniquely him, the one that had always made her feel safe and cherished and yet excited her immeasurably…
She’d be done for. What that would entail, exactly, she wasn’t sure, but she knew it wouldn’t be good.
“Well, as you can see, everything here is fine. And as you can also see, I’m no longer the delinquent that I once was, so you don’t have to worry about hauling me in for shoplifting or destruction of property.” Her voice was unfamiliar even to her, harsh, filled with years of anger and hurt. Where had it come from? She’d felt both of those things when she’d been forced to leave town, certainly. But she’d moved on. Had carved out a decent—no, a good life for herself.
Then why did she feel like simultaneously crying and throwing something as she stood here in a room that held so many memories, facing the man who, in her childish innocence, had once been her everything?
“You can go.” She added when he simply straightened, looked at her with those damn eyes that had always seen too much. It was as if he knew, ev
en after all this time—as if he could hear the unspoken words in her soul.
And how dare he seem so nonchalant, so unaffected by coming face to face with her when she, despite her best efforts, was torn to shreds inside? It was as if he’d come upon anyone, anyone at all that he’d once known.
It made her want to lash out, to kick and punch and scream just to get some kind of reaction out of him. But with the iron will that she’d been forced to forge after being unceremoniously dumped from her home, Ellie strove to match his impassiveness, nodding when he took a step back.
“I’m sure I’ll see you around then.” With an answering nod, he strode back across the room, the ugly carpet muffling his footsteps. Ellie bathed in the warm wave of relief at his retreating back, ignoring the baffling disappointment that infused it.
Gabe looked back over his shoulder as his feet hit the top step, and the sexy grin she remembered, tempered with restraint, made her knees shake.
“I hope some of that troublemaking delinquent is still in there, somewhere. Be a damn shame for all that fire to be snuffed out.”
And with that he was gone, leaving Ellie staring with a witty—she was sure it was witty—retort on the tip of her tongue. Damn it, she hated being the person who thought up the perfect comeback two hours after the fact.
But perfect or not, witty or not… he was gone.
Chapter Two
Rather than take the cruiser back out, touring the sleepy town on his nightly rounds, Gabe elected to continue on foot, hoping that the heat that never quite ended could cauterize some of the old wounds that had just had their scabs torn off.
He hadn’t spent the last ten years of his life obsessing over what might have been, but Ellie Kendrick had always indisputably been the one that got away. To his own surprise, he’d built a good life here in Florence, following in his father’s footsteps as sheriff, but he’d have been lying if he denied that he occasionally wondered what had happened to the girl who had once been his entire world.
He was stubborn enough, prideful enough, to have staunchly avoided looking her up on any of the social media sites that he’d joined only to drag the town’s police station into the present day. But he’d wondered.
The reality was far more vibrant than his imagination had ever been.
The girl he’d known had led a one woman mutiny against the small town, forging an intimidating appearance that had never, to his mind anyway, masked the fiery beauty that lay beneath. Now…
Now she had let her natural prettiness come through—the natural flame-bright gold of her hair accentuating the soft cream of skin he knew firsthand to be smooth beneath his fingers. Her eyes, that soft dove grey that darkened when she was mad or sad or filled with passion, were just as bright without the dark ring of paint.
And the jeans and tank that she’d been wearing showed that the once skinny girl had put on some weight… and as a man, both he and his cock appreciated it. In fact, even knowing who it was waiting for him up in Estelle Kendrick’s apartment, his first thought upon laying eyes on the woman he hadn’t seen for a decade was that the edgy, angry beauty he’d known had gotten hot.
But he was a man now, not the hormonal teen he’d once been. So he’d shoved his libido aside and did his best to hide how unsettled he was at coming face to face with the woman who still haunted him from time to time.
He’d known this face-off was coming, had known it since the moment he’d gotten news that Estelle had died, a heart attack likely brought about by the pack and a half of cigarettes she’d smoked daily for as long as Gabe could remember.
But he’d thought he was prepared for it. And when the funeral had come and gone, the small town turning out to honor one of its own—and there was no Ellie to be seen—he’d thought that maybe things had gotten so bad between Estelle and her granddaughter that they were completely estranged.
That would have surprised him, but he’d known it was a possibility. As Sheriff, he had had contact with Estelle, as he did with most other residents of the small Arizona town. The old woman might have been gruff, might have been fully aware of the past between him and Ellie. Still, she’d often thrown a nugget of information about Ellie into their conversations, as if throwing a stray dog a bone.
He’d always played it off, even to himself, but he knew now that he could recall every last bit of information that Estelle had thrown out over the years. The cities Ellie had moved to, the far-away places that she’d travelled. The floral design certificate that she’d gotten after her very practical degree in business.
Still… ten years was a long time. He’d been sure that those big eyes, the ones that could move from anger to heat with one sweep of those long dark lashes, would hold only memories, and no longer have any pull over him.
As he thought of the way she’d stood there in front of the window, the setting sunlight framing that delicious little body… of the way her unique combination of defiance and vulnerability took him right back through the years…
With a grimace, he changed direction, stepping off the sidewalk and onto the soft asphalt. He crossed the street and pushed through the steam misted glass door under the sign to Nina’s Diner. He needed a few minutes to regroup, for his world to stop spinning.
Nodding to Alice, the waitress who worked the late afternoon to evening shift, Gabe slid into a booth by the front window… one with a convenient view of the shop across the street. He ordered a coffee, wishing he wasn’t on duty so he could have added a stomach settling shot of whisky to it.
He wasn’t surprised, and in fact was perversely pleased, as he watched the front door of Estelle’s Blooms slam open, saw the clearly agitated woman step through.
It was gratifying to know that he wasn’t the only one who needed to do some head clearing. But when she looked across the street, those keen eyes narrowing in on him as he sat in the window, he felt something hot and indefinable tighten in his gut.
Ellie Kendrick had always been the most exciting thing in his life. Not even his straight-laced father had been able to condition that out of him.
“Down, boy.” He couldn’t take his eyes off the swaying of her hips as she stormed right into the street, then through the door of the diner. Her irritation was palpable, making the air between them crackle as she ignored the startled waitress and made her way right to his table, sliding into his booth with a polite sneer that he still, to his chagrin, found absurdly sexy.
Despite the overly sweet curve of her lips, Gabe was pretty sure that she was feeling every bit as confused and churned up as he was. And then he reminded himself that assuming she felt what he did was just plain stupid.
“Jaywalking in front of the Sheriff is just asking for a ticket,” he commented mildly as he tried to get himself under control. He had no idea what she was thinking or feeling—he didn’t know this woman at all, not anymore. They’d been strangers for a decade now, a separation hardened by the way in which they had parted.
Her lips sparked—that, at least, was familiar, and just as she always had, she covered her discomfort with bravado. “Bring out the handcuffs, then.”
Ellie’s cheeks turned a pretty shade of pink as she realized the innuendo behind what she’d just said. And Gabe… well, he felt a punch of heat straight to his gut.
Even if he’d never met her before, he would have walked into that flower shop and been mightily attracted to what he saw. But they had a past, so his hands were tied.
“Still can’t let someone else have the last word?” He knew he was being an ass, but it was the only defense that Gabe had against her. He smirked and settled back in his seat, the hard surface of the booth unyielding against his back.
Ellie’s eyes widened, a sure sign that he was about to get a tongue lashing. But to his surprise, she kept her mouth shut, folded her hands on the table.
“I…” Her lips parted, then closed again. Ellie Kendrick at a loss for words was a rare sight, and truth be told, it concerned him. She rose to leave, demonstrating a
control that she certainly hadn’t had when he’d known her before. “I shouldn’t have followed you.”
She appeared to be the picture of composure, but he could see the slight quiver in her chin, knew she was holding back.
The waitress chose that moment to deliver his coffee. The cup rattled in the saucer as Alice—a woman who had gone to school with both him and Ellie—set the steaming drink down in front of him, not bothering to hide her curiosity about Ellie.
“Here you go, Gabe.” Alice turned her freckles and mile wide smile on him just momentarily before returning her attention to Ellie. “And can I get anything for you, hon? If you haven’t been here before, I can recommend the sweet potato pie. It’s real special.”
A not so subtle way of prying into who Ellie was, and why she was here. Alice wasn’t being rude—it was just the way life in Florence ran. They didn’t get many tourists, since there wasn’t much to see beyond the abundance of prisons. A new face was a curiosity.
Ellie’s face wasn’t new, but it had been a long time. Still, even as she nodded politely at Alice, the other woman cocked her head to the side, her eyes narrowing in thought.
“You look awful familiar.” The waitress brushed a strand of bushy blonde curls behind her ear, then tapped her stubby pencil on her notepad.
“I’ll try that pie, please.” It was Ellie’s desperate attempt to throw Alice off the scent, Gabe knew, but it didn’t work. The blonde’s eyes lit up, and she let out a squeal that nearly burst his eardrums.
“Ellie Kendrick. Oh, I knew you’d be coming through sometime, what with your grandma’s passing and all.” Despite the sudden and utter stiffness of Ellie’s body, Alice swooped down and enfolded her in a hug. “Too bad you couldn’t get back for the funeral. I’m so sorry about that.”
If Ellie had been stiff before Alice had spoken, she became absolutely rigid at the words. Gabe furrowed his brow, confused.