Mad About You

by Bond, Stephanie

  He was building their house in their meadow—did he intend to ask her to share it with him?

  "Look at that tree!" Chad yelled, pointing across the meadow. "It's huge!"

  Virginia looked up and smiled in spite of her muddled thoughts. It was Bailey's tree, the one his father had planted for him.

  "Want to ride over?" Bailey asked Chad, who responded with an eager nod.

  The three of them rode abreast slowly, and Bailey recounted the story of Chad's grandfather planting the tree. The sprawling oak was a magnificent sight, having grown exponentially since she'd last seen it. She estimated the trunk at ten feet in diameter.

  "That's awesome!" Chad exclaimed.

  Bailey smiled. "I'm glad you think so," he said as he reined in next to a smaller, lone oak tree, about fifteen feet tall. "Because this tree is yours."

  "Really?" Chad asked.

  Virginia was as surprised as Chad.

  "Yep. I took an acorn from my tree and planted it the day you were born."

  Chad didn't say anything, just stared at the tree with an awestruck expression.

  The news shook Virginia to the core. "You never told me, Bailey."

  He shifted in his saddle. "I wasn't even sure it would germinate, and by the time it started growing..." He trailed off and smiled sadly.

  By the time it started growing, Lois Green had ripped their son from their lives. She bit her tongue—God, would she ever stop hurting?

  "You mean that tree is the same age as I am?" Chad asked, grinning.

  "To the day," Bailey responded.

  Chad looked at the older tree. "Is it okay to climb it?"

  Bailey pursed his lips as if he were pondering the question. "Well, if you're going to find a good place to build a tree house, I guess you'd better scout it out with a good climb."

  "Oh, boy!" Chad said, kneeing his horse forward.

  "Be careful," Bailey called sternly. "Walk him over to the fence to climb down, just like you mounted, then tie him off like I showed you."

  "Okay, Bailey."

  Virginia watched the exchange, feeling more and more like an outsider. The house, the tree, the open space, the paternal guidance—in Chad's eyes she could never compete with any of those things. Her face must have betrayed her emotions, because Bailey asked, "Ginny, what's wrong?"

  She shook her head, smiling sadly. "Chad loves it here."

  "I loved it when I was his age too." Bailey dismounted, then offered her a hand.

  She swung down, her body inches from his, her head still spinning.

  Bailey held her gaze for a few seconds, then cleared his throat. "Listen, Ginny, I don't know if this is the right time, but I realize you're having a rough time with Chad, and I was hoping you'd consider letting him move in with me at Rita's while you and I work things through."

  Stunned, she only stared at him. Let Chad move in with him while they "worked things through"? "I don't understand," she murmured.

  "Well, I've been giving this some thought," he said, his words sounding rehearsed. "School will be starting in a few weeks, so it would be best to get him settled in now, rather than move him in the middle of the school year."

  "Move him in the middle of the school year?" she parroted.

  "Well, yeah, the house should be finished by mid-October."

  Her mouth tightened in dawning realization. It had all been a ploy. Butter her up to let Chad move in with him, knowing full well it would be next to impossible to revert if she and Bailey couldn't "work things through."

  "No," she said.

  He frowned slightly. "What?"

  "I said no," she said, her voice louder. "Chad's not coming here to live. He belongs with me—his mother."

  "But I don't want to live with you!" Chad shouted.

  She spun in surprise, as did Bailey. They hadn't heard him approaching on foot.

  "Chad—" She took a step toward him.

  "No!" He backed up. "Tell her, Bailey, tell her about our plan!"

  "Chad." Bailey's voice held a warning note.

  Virginia narrowed her eyes. "What plan?"

  Chad turned on her, his eyes flashing. "Bailey told me last week that I could move in with him and live at Shenoway, but you weren't supposed to know because you'd probably try to ruin it like you're trying to ruin it now."

  Her blood ran cold, her limbs were paralyzed. No wonder Chad had been alienating her more and more. Bailey must have promised him it would be just the two of them, without her in the way. All she could manage was a steady stare at Bailey. What had he said one night at her house? That he would have to resort to drastic measures? How foolish could she have been? A few flowers, a few kisses, and she'd jumped right back into his arms like a naïve coed.

  "Ginny." He raised his hand in stop-sign fashion. "He's taking my words out of context."

  "You can't keep me from living with my father!" Chad yelled.

  "That's enough, Chad," Bailey said, his voice low and commanding. "I need to talk to your mother alone."

  "She's not my mother!" Chad shouted as he walked away sniffling, pulling out his slingshot.

  "Be careful with that thing." He turned to her. "Ginny—"

  "How dare you," she said through gritted teeth, tears scalding her eyes. "How dare you pretend to care for me, take me out, even make lo"—she choked—"have sex with me… it was all a setup."

  "Ginny," he growled, clasping her arms, "listen to me! I meant that I wanted us all to be here together—Chad misunderstood, that's all."

  She pulled away. "Don't touch me.” Turning her head, she yelled, "Chad, come with me. We're going home."

  Virginia climbed back into her saddle, avoiding Bailey's eyes. She burned with humiliation… her heart felt raw.

  "No." Chad jutted out his chin, then rocketed another stone onto the pond's rippling surface.

  "Get on your horse and come with me," she said evenly.

  "Do it," Bailey said to his son, his voice sounding resigned.

  She watched as Chad moved to obey Bailey, biting her tongue to control her fury. Bailey had to get in one last demonstration of how well Chad minded him and how well he ignored her. Wheeling her horse away from Bailey, she waited until Chad's mount caught up with hers, then began a slow walk back.

  Bailey watched them ride away through watery eyes, his hands fisted in frustration. How had things gone from promising to impossible in the span of a few minutes?

  * * *

  "But I don't want to go," Chad said, his tone belligerent as he slung his duffel into the trunk.

  Ginny shut the trunk lid firmly. "I'm sorry. I know you don't want to go, but we have to."

  "But why?" he persisted.

  "Because," she said calmly, swinging into the driver's seat, "we can't stay here."

  "I can."

  She bit the inside of her cheek as she started the engine and shifted into gear. "You're coming home with me."

  "I hate that place—it's boring."

  "I've been thinking about that. I'll talk to a realtor next week about finding a house with a bigger yard."

  "Big deal," he said miserably.

  "I'm trying to make things better for you," she said, looking both ways before pulling into traffic and driving away from Shenoway.

  He looked out the window for several seconds quietly, then asked, "Why?"

  She frowned slightly. "Why am I trying to make things better for you?"

  "Yeah, you couldn't care less about me."

  Virginia nearly ran off the road, then slowed her speed. "How could you say such a thing?"

  "Because it's true," he said. "When I got in trouble at the mall, you wanted the cops to take me away."

  She gasped. "I didn't want them to take you away, I only wanted you to understand the consequence of your actions."

  "You won't let me do things by myself because you don't trust me."

  "That's not true," she said, shaking her head. "I guess I'm a little overprotective—I'll work on it."

  "Yo
u said you hated my mom."

  She closed her eyes briefly. "I said those words out of frustration and anger. I wish I could take them back. I don't hate Lois, I hate only that you and I lost all that time together."

  "You broke my game," he said, his voice growing more angry.

  She inhaled deeply. "You're right, I did, but it was an accident. I swear I didn't see it lying there."

  "Then you accused me of stealing your locket."

  She bit her lip to stem her welling tears. He was building quite a convincing case against her mothering skills. Despite her intuition about the locket, he was right, she had no proof. "I apologize, Chad," she said in a low voice. "It must have fallen off while I was wearing it and I didn't notice."

  "And now you're using me to get back at Bailey."

  Virginia's speed fell off and the car behind her blared its horn. "What did you say?"

  "You're using me—"

  "You're way out of line, young man."

  "It's true," he yelled. "You didn't mind him coming over to see me as long as he kissed you all the time! Now you're mad because he wants it to be just the two of us, so you're not going to let him see me at all!"

  His words reverberated in her head, triggering a low hum of panic. Chad was treading closer to the truth than she cared to admit. She had begun to anticipate Bailey's visits nearly as much as Chad did. Now, after discovering he was only trying to get next to Chad, she had retaliated by taking Chad away. In one week she'd already made the mistake she'd seen coworkers and acquaintances make, the one thing she'd promised herself she'd never do... use her child to get back at the other parent.

  Tears slid down her cheeks. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm so sorry."

  He frowned, exasperated. "You don't have to cry." He shifted in his seat to look out the window.

  But the dawning truth laid her heart wide open, and she couldn't stop the steady stream of tears.

  Chapter Fourteen

  "YOU LOOK A LITTLE PEAKED, DEAR," Peg said, touching Virginia's arm.

  "I'm fine, Mom, just tired, that's all." She sipped her coffee, trying to avoid her mother's probing gaze until Chad and her father returned from loading his things into the RV.

  "Ginny, being a mother is difficult," she said. "And you've had it much harder than most. Don't be too rough on yourself—he's a good boy."

  Virginia nodded, smiling faintly.

  "Is Bailey helping?"

  Another nod. "He's great with Chad, and Chad adores him."

  Peg laughed softly. "You know, I kind of wondered if you and Bailey might get back together."

  Her heart squeezed. "No chance of that."

  "Oh? He seems to have grown up a lot since you were married."

  "He has," she admitted. "He's building a house, he's cut back on drinking, and he has a new job." She tilted her head and bit her bottom lip. "Mom, I know this is hypothetical, but if you and Dad had divorced, who would I have lived with?"

  Her mother's eyebrows inched upward as she considered the question. "Probably me, if only because of logistics."

  "What if I'd wanted to live with Dad?" Virginia pressed, hoping for some kernel of wisdom.

  Peg sighed. Her mother could see where her questions were leading. "And your dad wanted it too?"

  "Yes," Virginia said softly. "Very much."

  "You're asking if I would break my own heart to save my child's?"

  "Yes, I suppose that's what I'm asking."

  After a long sip of coffee, Peg raised her gaze to her daughter's. "If I truly believed you would have been at least as healthy and more happy with your father, then I would have let you go. Especially," she added, "if you had been a boy." She smiled sadly. "Like I said, being a mother is difficult."

  "How do I know if I'm making the right choice?"

  Peg squeezed Virginia's hand. "You don't."

  The front door creaked open, then two pairs of heavy footsteps came toward them.

  "Peg?" her father called good-naturedly as he entered the kitchen. "If you're finished yakking, we men have got everything loaded up and ready to go." He winked at Virginia, and she stood to give him a hug and a kiss.

  "Bye, Pop," she said, then turned to her mother and gave her an extra-hard squeeze. "Thanks," she whispered.

  They filed to the door, Virginia trailing. "Chad," she said.

  He'd been strangely quiet and cautious around her since her tearful trip home the day before. "Yeah?" he said, his voice sounding normal for a change.

  She reached over to brush back his bangs, love washing over her at this tentative contact. He hadn't often allowed her to touch him. "Here's some spending money." She pressed a twenty-dollar bill into his hand. "Have fun." She smiled, then leaned down and kissed his forehead. He blinked in surprise, but didn't jerk away.

  Virginia stood on the stoop and watched as they drove away, waving at Chad as he stared at her through the back window. At the last second he raised his hand in a small wave, then he was gone.

  Ignoring the midmorning heat, she walked down the steps and knelt to weed her front mulch beds. If she kept her hands busy, she might not dwell on her impetuous behavior where Bailey was concerned. What a mess she'd made of things. For now it felt good to be able to tidy up some small part of her life. She tore at the wild plants, ripping them out by the roots. When she finished, she tossed the weeds into her garbage can, then wheeled it to the curb.

  On the way back inside, she checked the black metal mailbox beside her door, then sifted through the mail as she slipped off her shoes inside the entryway. Two official-looking envelopes caught her eye, one addressed to Chad, the other addressed to "Guardian of." After tearing the flap of the second envelope with her thumbnail, she withdrew a short letter informing Chad Green, also known as Bailey Kallihan, Jr., along with a parent or legal guardian to appear in juvenile court in two weeks. She assumed the other letter was a duplicate, so she walked upstairs to leave it on his desk.

  She opened his bedroom door and placed the letter where he'd find it. As she turned to go, she saw the small packing carton of Chad's pictures shoved under his desk. Virginia stared at the box for a full minute, torn. Then she slowly bent over to slide it across the carpet, and sat down cross-legged. With a deep breath she opened the lid.

  The odor of old paper enveloped her. On top of the pictures lay the broken pieces of the beloved Nintendo game. She carefully set them aside to thumb through the curled photos. Some of the older pictures were Lois Green as a little girl. She had not been a happy child, nor had her parents, from their dour expressions.

  Each time Virginia found a photo with Chad in it, she laid it aside to assemble some kind of chronological order. After an hour she had exhausted the pile, and Chad's childhood lay spread before her. She then lovingly scrutinized each photo, at long last experiencing his first step, his first Christmas, his first tricycle, his first day of school. The abundance of photos made it clear that Lois was a doting mother, and for a few quiet seconds Ginny looked heavenward, closed her eyes, and gave thanks to the woman for at least preserving these precious moments.

  From the gap in pictures she estimated the time when Lois began to get sick. Suddenly Chad was nearly his present age, and all his poses with Lois were from her bed, where successive photos chronicled her deterioration. One photo in particular caught her eye because in it Lois was smiling especially wide, her thin arm around Chad and his arm around her. It couldn't have been long before she died—the developing paper was new and slick.

  She fingered the photo, an idea blooming.

  She went to a crafts store and bought a shadow box, then she spent an hour gluing the Nintendo device back together—it would never work again, but she made it look passably good. With adhesive she mounted the game console and other mementos Lois had saved—photos, amusement park tickets, school programs, and Chad’s artwork—inside the shadow box in an artful composition. She set it in her bedroom to dry, suddenly more happy than she'd felt in days.

  The phone
rang. When she saw Bailey’s name on the display, she let it roll to voice mail, then listened to the message he left.

  "Ginny, hi, it's Bailey. I wanted to tell Chad goodbye before he left, but things have been crazy here at the office—God, I never thought I'd hear myself say that." His laugh was short and dry, then his voice grew softer. "I need to talk to you—I'd like to come over. I hope you'll let me explain about Sunday. I'm sorry... I should have talked to you before I said anything to Chad. As usual, I only made things worse. I'll be here until around six-thirty." He rattled off the number. "Please call me."

  Virginia felt remarkably calm listening to his words. She suspected that her humiliation and anger had simply yielded to numbness. She'd always had a blind spot where Bailey Kallihan was concerned, but now she had a higher priority—her son.

  For Chad's sake, she would develop and maintain a cordial relationship with Bailey, even if it killed her... or broke her heart. If she were going to give up her son to him, she would at least keep a little of herself. And just like that, the decision was made... the decision she had feared from the very beginning.

  She would allow Chad to live with Bailey.

  She would learn to be satisfied with occasional outings, with stolen hours here and there, with being a spectator in her son's life. Within time her own loss would be offset by seeing him happy under Bailey's care.

  Virginia inhaled deeply. No more tears.

  * * *

  "Bailey." Lenny walked into his office and tossed a note on his desk. "Cassie forgot to give you this message. Lady named Virginia called about an hour ago."

  Frowning, Bailey snatched up the note. No need to stop by—will be out this evening. Everything's fine. "Everything's fine," he muttered. "What the hell does that mean?"

  Lenny looked perplexed. "Means everything's fine, Bailey."

  "Not with Ginny, it doesn't."

  "I take it she's your ex?"

  "Yeah."

  "Mine's a heap of trouble too."

  Bailey pulled a hand down his face, then loosened his tie. "That's not the problem, Len. Ginny's the one that got away."

  "Oh, I see. Well, she must be the only woman in the world to turn you down."