Slice (The Elledge Family #1)

by L Johnson

“I'm not going anywhere.” I smiled.

  “Neither am I.” McMillan added.

  “Good, I like having you around.” He ignored the agent and touched my shoulder. “Whoever this fucker was beat the shit out of you.” Lucas laughed. “No traveling for you anytime soon.”

  “I know. My apartment has to be cleared, but now it's a crime scene.”

  “Well, good thing it was just you.” Lucas looked at McMillan. “Can we have a moment?”

  “It was not just him.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Whitney Sanders died.”

  “Whit?” Lucas stared at me. “Are you okay? I mean I know you loved her?”

  “I don't think it's hit me yet.” I grimaced.

  “Whatever you do, keep this shit away from Cypress. She has cried three times in the last ten minutes and I don't know why. I don't want to know why. And she wants to see you. So you need to get better by tomorrow.”

  “Impossible. I have like three ribs broken and my face looks like...”

  “You lost the worst fight of your life.” McMillan nodded his head. “I will be checking back in with you once we have evaluated the crime scene. Please stay available.”

  “I have no choice. I'll be here.” I watched him as he left. “You should be with those kids.”

  “I know what you done.” Lucas said. “And I can't go into it because I have to feed those babies when I get there, but I appreciate it and I will be back down here shortly.”

  “Who?”

  “Mark.” He smiled. “I know you loved her.”

  “I can't talk about it.”

  “Don't talk about it.” Lucas advised. “It's better when you don't.”

  Lucas

  I couldn't help but think that I had turned everyone around me into some kind of monster. Asher, the one brother that had nothing tied to him was a murderer now. Cypress even turned a blind eye to everything that I had done, granted she didn't know much.

  The babies slept. And my eyes were glued to them like they were going to get up and walk away. I just wanted to make sure that they were never touched, but whatever was in me.

  “You should go home and shower?”

  “I wouldn't dream of it.” I said with a smile.

  “You can't be smelling up the place Lucas.” Cypress was playful. I shook my head. “I think that she can survive you showering.”

  Willow had a mess of blonde curls piled on her head, but her skin was already the most beautiful shade of tan I'd ever seen. She had yet to open her eyes and I just wanted to be there for it. “I can't leave. What if she opens her eyes while I'm gone?”

  “She'll open them again.”

  “I don't want to miss it.” I touched the Nathaniel's hand. He'd opened his eyes and gripped my finger already. He had stolen my heart with just the first cry and Willow just first sight.

  “How is Asher?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I overheard the entire conversation with Mark.” She added. “Don't try to hide shit from me. It won't work.”

  “He is okay.”

  “Well, I hope he gets better soon... I want him to be Willow's godfather and it really can't work if he is crippled.”

  “You want that?”

  “Yes and Mark the godfather for Nathaniel. They have to have some good male role models in their life besides you. And Callum definitely didn't have a chance in the running.”

  “You hate him and he really is not a bad guy.”

  “I don't hate him.”

  “You do too babe.” I nodded my head.

  “It's because he won't even marry that poor girl. Holly has been there for him for the long run and he can't even give her a ring and some stability.”

  “My cousin is a thinker. He doesn't love with his heart. He loves with his mind and that is why he hasn't even thought about asking her. He wants to make sure that if he makes this commitment that it will be a wise commitment. He isn't like me. I love with everything he loves with one step at a time and it works for him.”

  “Whatever, I call him a coward. You made the choice and yeah, we are not perfect by any means, but we are both on the same page or at least in the same chapter. We want something more. I couldn't be your girlfriend for more than two years.”

  “I know.”

  “You know me well.”

  “This is true.” I sat down on the bed with her.

  “Should we get married before we leave?”

  “We can get married in a courthouse and I would be happy Cypress.”

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Cypress

  The days seemed to fly pass us now that there was a deadline. Lucas had found a home on the Ireland Sea Shore and it sat alone on a plot of land that gazed into the most beautiful view in all of Ireland. He had closed on it with the help of his father and Callum. We just had to move everything which was not as simple. Especially because at only 3 weeks old the babies had developed their little personalities. Nathaniel was a screamer. He screamed when he needed to be changed. He cried when he wanted to be fed and then he sat quietly in his swing. He rarely wanted to be held though Mark held him enough for everyone.

  Then there was Willow. She was always with Lucas. She was his princess. It even hurt me because she would cry for him. Daddy's little girl was picky. He sang to her an Irish song he said his mom used to sing and it lulled her to sleep every time. I didn't even know he could sing but his voice was like an angel. The Parting Glass seemed to me and her away when he sang it.

  “This milk makes her gassy.” Lucas laid her in the bassinet and walked over to Nathaniel who was quiet. “Little fella you are like me. Change it.”

  “How is he like you?”

  “I hated to be held. I found more comfort in my solace. My mum said I even cried sometimes when she held me.”

  “Well, that just means you liked your independence.” My heart raced. If whatever Lucas was burdened with I didn't want the burden on my baby. “How many people in your family are like you?”

  “Like me?”

  “Killers Luke.”

  “Declan, Callum, me… maybe another one, two or five.” His eyes wandered. “He won't end up on that path okay. He has a mother that loves him beyond his wildest dreams.”

  “You had a great mom, Lucas.”

  “I know.”

  “So it didn't help you.”

  “It did more than you can know.”

  “Have you told the painters what color to paint their rooms?”

  “I don't even know why are we painting their room. We know that they will be with us for some years to come.”

  “Yeah, well they still have a room and I want it painted.” Lucas chuckled. “The house is a beauty I can't stop staring it.”

  “Your father did well.”

  “Yeah, he said that it was secluded and not far from everyone that we will need.”

  “Well, good.”

  “And I've been thinking. You could be a teacher...”

  “A teacher?”

  “Yeah, you love English… they speak it in most areas. There are some that don't but the area we are going to be in you could thrive. Just put in your application and I can have some strings pulled.”

  “What about my babies?”

  “Nadine is great with children of all ages. You said you wanted to work. I just wanted to make sure you have something to do over.”

  “I will. I can be a mom for a while and then maybe I'll go ahead and jump into the job world of Ireland.” The thought of leaving the babies with Nadine had not seemed pleasant though she was a great woman. I just wanted them to myself for a while… some years probably. “What are you going to do over there?”

  “Uhm, actually I was going to be a professor over there at the local Uni.”

  “Teach college?”

  “Yeah, my uncle is a professor over there and he said with my credentials, I could teach basic English and a writing class or two. It's good money. It's a good little job
. It'll keep me close to home and I'll have a flexible schedule.”

  “I like it… Professor Elledge.”

  Lucas smirked. “They said that Persephone is talking to the FBI about me.”

  “Bitch,” I murmured under my breath. “Well, you shouldn't have fucked her.”

  “I know.”

  “Once we leave, she'll be a pigment of our imagination.”

  “I can be extradited love. It's not that simple.” Lucas poured a glass of juice for himself. “I need to know that if I can't be with you that you can survive without me?”

  “Without you?” My voice cracked. “Why would I have to?”

  “You know now love. There is always gonna be this chance that something could go wrong and someone could tell. Hell, Persephone is a perfect example.”

  “Your past is done now.”

  “No, ma'am. Everything that I have done is under a microscope and they are digging. I'm always careful. I always think. But a moment of weakness, one simple drop of DNA and I am a dead man walking.”

  “Stop talking like this.”

  “Listen to me Cypress.” His voice raised and his eyes pierced into me. “I need to know that you are strong enough to be alone.”

  “I can't think about that. I just had a set of twins for God sake. You don't come with a warning sign you know that? Like a hey, don't fuck with him… I fell for you and you got to fix everything that is wrong and do it now. I can't be a single mother in Ireland.”

  “Fix it?” The anger lingered between us.

  “Yeah.” The wooden stool had grown uncomfortable. “I told you before it was more than just now and you have to be here. I don't want to be like Luna… I don't want you to be like Declan. I want you here and I want you to stay here. This is us. So you have to fix it.”

  “Think rationally. Step out of that fantasy world Cypress. Shit could go downhill tomorrow and you wouldn't have a clue of what you are going to do. First don't grieve me. I deserve whatever the fuck is coming to me. I know it. I know that there is too much bloody wrong that I have done to be living this great. I want you to listen.”

  “Shut up.” I snapped.

  “Don't listen then.”

  “I won't.” I heard the small cry of Willow and turned to get her pushing pass Lucas.

  “Stop!” The boom of his voice filled the room. His grip on my arms was tight. I squirmed. “Please listen to me. I don't want you to be like my mum. She grieved him, and he was still alive. Promise me that you'll move on. I'm not worth grieving.”

  “Do you plan on dying?” I pushed him and was still hooked to him,

  “Does anyone?”

  “I don't have to think about a world without you. That's not what normal couples do. They plan their future together and then they think of death 70 years later when the great grandchildren have children.” My eyes ached from the pressure of holding back tears. “It's not fair to,” I paused. “I'm not gonna do it.”

  Lucas shook his head. “Go get her,” He whispered.

  “Thank you.”

  “You're welcome.” I heard the rattle of his keys.

  “Where are you going?”

  “Out baby, I won't be long. I swear to it.”

  Lucas

  There had always been a plan for the end. There was always an end and from a young age, I knew that mine would not be a good one. Good things don't happen to horrible people. I couldn't force her to understand, but McMillan had me backed into a corner. The feds were known for not losing and McMillan had gathered enough evidence to make it stick. If he hadn't he would have backed off by now. Persephone, she was a link and there had to be someone else but I couldn't think of anyone else to link the shit together.

  The whiskey burned the back of my throat. The chatter of the bar was a dull roar. My mind raced constantly. I knocked back the rest of the drink and my eyes stung. I cleared my throat and realized that there were tears. What was I here for? To kill? To love? To be loved? To love to kill? I wiped my face and slid the cup towards the bartender.

  “You okay?”

  “I'm fine sir,” I pointed at the cup. “Another round?”

  “Yes, sir,” The old man poured the glass full. “It's on the house okay?”

  “Deal,” I must look horrible. “I sipped it slowly and felt the tingle of the alcohol fill my body.

  “Lucas, just who I was looking for.” The stool beside me was now filled with Shia. She pushed me lightly. “Fatherhood not so good?”

  “Perfect actually,” I shook my head. “What can I do for you?”

  “Well, I have a dilemma on my hands and I know that you are the one person that can help me.” She smiled. “I found out I was pregnant last week.”

  “Congrats,” my mumble escaped. “You'll love it.”

  “Well, Mark said that he didn't want it. And that he didn't want me either.”

  “That's unfortunate.”

  “It's devastating. I want to be with him.”

  “You can't force someone to do something.” I answered.

  “Could you talk to him?”

  “I'd rather not. I have enough shit on my plate. Convincing my brother to be a man is not one of them.” I sniffled. I stared at my pitiful reflection in the mirror. My eyes were red as wine. “Sorry.”

  “What's got you hot and bothered?”

  “Shit.”

  “I know about you. I mean Ireland was enough to know. They all but blurted it out and you have fed on your tail.”

  I blocked her words out and cleared my throat. The walls tilted in and everything felt light. “Shia… fight your own battles.”

  “Tell him to stay with me… or I'll talk to the agents myself. I mean… then me and my baby could be under Witpro… and maybe have a normal life. That would eliminate everything…”

  “You must not understand who you are fucking with...”

  “Perhaps I could tell Cypress a little about you and then your mom and sister.” She kept her voice down to a whisper and then touched my arm. “I know exactly who you are and I don't want much.”

  “Fuck you.” I growled. I stood to leave my legs wobbled. I gripped the wooden bar beneath my fingers to keep from falling to the ground.

  “Sir, if you're leaving I'll have to call someone for you.”

  “Perfect, call this normal...” I slid my phone across the counter and stared at her. “Get the fuck out of my face bitch.”

  “I'll talk to you when you're sober.”

  “It'd be safer if you didn't.”

  “You'd be safer if you knew everything I did. You know where to find me... Congrats again daddy.”

  “Bitch.” I stuttered.

  “Yeah, he is hammered out of his mind. I can't let him leave like this.” The bartender said. “Yeah, I mean he seems cool with waiting. We're on the corner of 8th and Anderson. It's called Stoners. Yeah, no thank you. I'll keep an eye out for him.” He clicked the red button on the screen and handed me my phone. “You want something while you wait?”

  “No, I'll just wait.”

  Ten minutes seemed to drag by before Asher and Mark walked into the bar. They both had this fucking grin on their face. Everything was fine for them. Persephone's death had been ruled a homicide, but they were looking for an unidentified robber and then there was Mark. He never worried and he was never bothered.

  “What the hell are you doing here?” Mark looked around. The bar was a quiet place. No one came here except for loners.

  “Drinking.” I nodded my head. “You two are always here to save me.”

  “That's what brother's do most of the time.” Mark sat down on the stool to my right. “What's the matter?”

  “I can't do it anymore.” I whispered.

  Asher looked. “Do what? Fatherhood, you just started. And you seem great. There is nothing to worry about.”

  “Not about fatherhood.” My words slurred.

  “Then what?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Tell me, damn it.” Asher
turned his head to me once he understood me. “You here drinking yourself into a mess. It has your mind all fucked up and you can't think like this alright. Come on.”

  “Yeah.”

  “Don't.”

  “Don't what? Why are you crying?”

  I felt the tears fall onto my shirt. “Get me out of here, please.”

  “No, tell me what's wrong.” Mark pulled my face up and I shook uncontrollably.

  “Get me the fuck out of here! Right fucking now!” I yelled.

  “Come on, we can go somewhere and talk for a while.”

  I didn't answer them. I followed them out to the car and lay in the back seat. I could kill dozens of people, but myself… I felt shattered. I had no idea where the car was headed. I just knew that the sky was no longer blue. It rained oranges and yellows with clouds that hypnotized me. My eyes hooked to them like there was nothing left.

  “What was he talking about?” Mark whispered.

  “Nothing,” Asher lied. I wiped my face.

  He knew. He looked terrified. “Tell me,” Mark growled.

  “Let him tell you.” He spat.

  “Lucas wake your ass up.” The car stopped and they opened their doors.

  “I'd rather not.”

  “Come on.” Asher opened the back door and held his hand out.

  We were at the ravine and it was peaceful. So peaceful. I climbed out of the back seat. “Thank you.” My head pounded from the combination of drinking and the tears.

  “Spit it out. Why are you down? I mean you are about to leave.”

  “Mark, I guess… I should tell you.”

  “Tell me please.” Mark opened a bottle of the beer.

  “I don't believe in angels.” I smirked. “I don't believe in miracles and I don't believe in fate. I do believe in karma and it's coming full circle. I've killed so many people. And I don't know why I do it. I wish I knew why. I would stop it. I would be a soccer dad who has sleep overs and lets my wife have book club at our house. I don't want to anymore, but I can't stop. I've tried and it's all catching up to me...”

  “You're leaving.”

  “It doesn't matter.” Mark's words were rushed. “It's about to be a brand new start for you.”

  “Yeah, it does. I can't just start over. It's not that simple. It's not fair to everyone else around me.”