by Pandora Pine
18
The next two weeks passed in excruciating slowness for Cadence. She worked her shifts in the kitchen in the mornings and trained with her bow and arrow in the afternoons, lending help to the other women who were all diligently practicing.
No matter how busy she kept herself, her thoughts always returned to Donnall and the last night they’d spoken to each other. One minute they were lying cuddled together on the fur rug and the next minute he was making her feel dirty and ashamed before stomping out of her room. She’d seen him a time or two since then but he never made eye contact or spoke to her.
By modern standards losing her virginity when she was twenty years old made her a late bloomer. Most girls she knew had cashed in their purity when they were still in their teens. She’d held on to her virginity and held out for the man she would marry. There had been no way of knowing at the time Liam would turn out to be a felon.
Donnall accusing her of not being pure was more painful than hearing from two members of the Boston Police Department that her fiancé wouldn’t make it to the church on time because he’d been arrested. She’d never imagined anything else could ever rival that pain. Donnall walking out on her not only equaled the pain Liam caused, but doubled it. Somewhere in the middle of their squabbles and making up, she’d gone and fallen in love with her irritating barbarian.
The army of English Redcoats would be knocking at the castle gates in a matter of days. Regardless of how the battle had unfolded originally, Cadence needed to find a way to set things right with Donnall before it was too late.
If she only knew how.
“How much longer do you plan on moping about the castle?” Fionn asked, striding into Atlas’ freshly mucked stall.
“Well according to your heart, the English Army will be here to slaughter us in four days. So there is the answer to your question.”
Fionn raised an eyebrow, a small muscle in his cheek twitching. “You bring up a good point.”
“What point? I’ve barely said a word.”
“About our impending doom.” Fionn grinned cheerfully.
“Look, I’ve got a lot of work to do this morning and don’t have time for riddles. Say what needs saying and go.”
“Are you forgetting who is lord here, Donnall?” Fionn’s voice was low.
It wasn’t like Fionn to pull rank on him, but it was his own fault. He was acting like an arsehat. His heart pinched in his chest at the thought of Cadence’s favorite word. He sighed, his hands fisting on his hips. “No, Fionn. I have not forgotten you are lord of Moone Castle.”
“So then cut the shite and tell me what in hell this is all about. I know it has something to do with Cadence as she has been sulking around the castle with an identical look to the one you are wearing.”
“Yes, it has to do with Cadence.” It always had to do with Cadence.
“What have you done this time?” Fionn crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the back of the stall.
“Why do you assume I am the one at fault?” He was, but it still upset him that Fionn automatically jumped to that conclusion.
“It is usually the safe assumption.”
“Well, this time it’s her fault. She’s not a virgin.”
Fionn stared at him curiously. “And?”
“You know very well, what. She’s dirty, not pure.”
“Just like all of the young women you’ve taken to your bed since we were lads?”
“No! Not just like all of the others. Cadence is different.”
“So her purity matters to you only because you are in love with the lass?”
“I am not in love with Cadence.” He was in love with her and probably had been since the first moment he saw her, flat on her backside in Moone’s cemetery, five hundred plus years from today.
“Lie to yourself all you want, old friend, but you cannot lie to me.”
Donnall blew out a frustrated breath. He’d been struggling with the idea of virginity ever since he stormed out of Cadence’s room like a child throwing a tantrum. “Her virginity matters to me.” It was as much as he was willing to admit.
“Just like I assume it will matter to Mallory’s future husband one day.”
Donnall stood there dumbfounded. Fionn was right. One day Mallory would find a man who would want to marry her and then what? Would he throw her out on her ear when he found she wasn’t pure? Or would she have to resort to cutting her foot while her new husband slept and smear the blood on the sheets to fool him into thinking she’d been a virgin?
“I see I’ve struck a chord. Carter wasn’t a virgin either when we first got together. Neither was I for that matter.”
“That’s different and you know it. Men are different.”
“How? Don’t you think I would have liked to have been Carter’s first lover? I can tell you for a fact he wishes he had been mine.”
“Men are supposed to go off and sow their wild oats. It’s a rite of passage.” Their angry words were making Atlas edgy. Donnall motioned Fionn outside the high-strung stallion’s stall.
Fionn followed Donnall out of the stall, stopping while Donnall secured the door. “Carter told me virginity has no real standing in his and Cadence’s world.”
“So I’m supposed to live by the standards of 2015?” He didn’t think he could adapt to such liberal ways of thinking and behaving.
“Cut her some slack, Donnall. She was engaged to be married.”
“So you knew?” His anger continued to build. Why hadn’t Fionn shared this news with him?
“No. I did not know. I simply assumed based on what Carter told me about her relationship with Liam.”
“Why do I have to cut her some slack? Why doesn’t anyone ever cut me slack?”
“Not insisting you marry any of the women you’ve ruined is cutting you slack. Quite a bit of it.”
Donnall sighed. He’d lost the battle. Question was, did he want to lose the war as well?
“Like you said earlier, the English Army will be here soon and in the days to follow this may all be a moot point. Hold tight to what matters most to you, Donnall. You may not get another chance to tell the lass how you feel. We are all facing death. Do you really want to meet the reaper without having resolved this mess with your beauty?”
“Why am I the one having to do all the changing?” Donnall grumped.
“Who says you are? I had to change plenty when Carter came into my life and when he left me, you saw the lengths I went to in order to bring him home. Can you honestly tell me you wouldn’t do the same for Cadence?”
19
The bright November Frost Moon certainly earned its name. Cadence was lying on Fairy Hill wrapped in a thick blanket staring up at the brilliant night sky. The light of the full moon made the twinkling stars seem washed out by comparison.
Another full day had passed with no word or even a glance from Donnall. It was more than she could bear. Her tears were cold against her skin as they tracked down her temples to melt into her red hair.
Fionn and Carter had been overly solicitous of her during dinner. They’d told funny stories about their own rocky courtship, both of them laughing so hard at times they were beyond speech. It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate them trying to cheer her up, she just wasn’t in the mood to laugh.
She’d had a lot of free time over the last few weeks to think about her relationship with Liam. Hindsight being 20/20, their relationship had been rife with red warning flags. She and Donnall may have argued, but she knew he’d always been honest with her. It was obvious Liam wasn’t the man for her and at the moment, alone under the full moon, it didn’t seem like Donnall was either.
“May I join you? I brought an extra blanket.”
Cadence had been so lost in thought, she hadn’t heard Donnall approaching. “Sure.” She stared straight up at the stars while Donnall set down his blanket and got comfortable.
Hastily wiping away her tears, she tried to pull herself together. The last thing
she wanted was for Donnall to see how much their fight had affected her. She couldn’t help noticing the space he’d put between them. It was only a foot or two, but to Cadence, it felt like a mile.
“Do you know about Orion?” She hated the silence stretched out in front of them and talking about the night sky was a safe enough topic.
“The clan name doesn’t sound familiar. Are they from Kildare?”
“No, the constellation Orion.” Cadence lay back on the blanket and stared up at the night sky. “See the three stars in a row.” She pointed up.
“No, where?” Donnall wiggled closer, brushing his shoulders against hers as he lay back on the blanket.
“More to the left. They’re the brightest stars in the sky.” She pointed up.
“Oh yes, there. I see them now.” Donnall mirrored the position of her arm.
“Do you see how four other stars make up four corners?” She pointed to each of them in turn.
“Yes.”
“That’s Orion.”
“How did an Irishman make it into the night sky?”
Cadence snorted. “Not O’Ryan, O-R-I-O-N. He was a hunter, a warrior, like you.”
“A good man then.”
Cadence nodded. Donnall was a good man, flawed, yes, but honest. “No one is sure how he died in Ancient Greece, but the two most popular theories are that he died from the bite of a scorpion or by the arrow of Artemis, who killed him to keep him from destroying the world.”
“What a coincidence. It seems I am about to make his very same mistake.”
She knew it wasn’t an easy admission for Donnall to make. “I’m not blameless either.”
“It wasn’t fair to judge you for something you cannot change.”
“I would if I could,” she whispered.
“What do you mean?”
“If I could go do it all over again, I would save myself for you.” She meant it. It would mean the world to her if she had that gift to offer Donnall.
His legs tangling in the blanket as he rolled over, Donnall reached for Cadence’s tear-stained face. “I was such a fool. Can you forgive me?”
“I can, but that doesn’t change anything between us. I’m still not a virgin.”
“Fionn asked me if I was prepared to live my life without you over an antiquated notion that no longer has a place in your time.”
Having grown up in the same century with the same values, Fionn was surprisingly quick to adopt new ways of thinking. She knew it was because of his love for Carter and couldn’t help wondering if Donnall changed his mind for the same reason. It was a foolish thought, there was no way he loved her. “What was your answer?”
“All I know is that these last two weeks without you have been unbearable. Even more terrifying is the thought you might go back home after the battle.”
“Over the last few weeks, I’ve come to think of Moone as my home. All that is left for me back in 2015 is my sister, Bree and Islynn is convinced she will want to spend the rest of her life here in 1433.”
“And what of you, little mouse? Do you want to spend the rest of your life here as well?”
Cadence nodded and Donnall pulled her into his arms. She wrapped her arms around him and held on tight not wanting to ever let him go.
“You’re freezing with the cold. Let’s go back inside and leave Orion to keep watch over us.”
Once they were back inside, Donnall led her to the great hall to stand in front of the roaring fire. The rest of the castle was still eating dinner while it seemed Fionn and Carter were having an intense discussion.
“No, Fionn! I will not stand by idle while you lead the charge against the English!” Carter stood abruptly when Fionn reached for his arm, knocking his chair back to land against the stone floor with a clatter.
“You are being unreasonable!” Fionn stood and took a half a step toward Carter, using every bit of his 6’5” stature to tower over his lover.
Donnall looked over at Cadence who was watching the escalating fight in horror. The blanket she was wrapped in had slipped off one shoulder, falling off completely when she moved to stand next to him. “What should we do?”
“We do nothing. We must let Carter and Fionn work this out between them.”
“I fought bravely and well against the McRoth’s.”
“Yes, you did, but this time is different.”
“How?”
“Because we are fathers, even as you insist on behaving like a child!” Fionn bellowed.
Cadence slipped her hand into Donnall’s and leaned closer to him.
“Oh, I’m behaving like a child? You’re the one telling me I can’t fight in the battle because you’re afraid something will happen to me!”
“I am not afraid something will happen to you!”
“So it doesn’t matter if the English kill me?” Carter sounded like a petulant child.
“Our children will be savagely murdered!” Fionn screamed, his voice breaking.
Everyone in the room went silent at that.
“You keep telling us only a few women survived the battle,” Fionn’s raspy voice was harsh. “Like a new alpha wolf in a pack, the English will kill all of Moone’s children.”
The great hall erupted. Men were yelling and the women were wailing. If Donnall didn’t do something now, a riot could start. “Calm down everyone,” Donnall yelled over the din of voices. He was weaving and bobbing through the crowd to get to the head table where Fionn and Carter were staring at each other, their hands balled into fists.
“Now see what you’ve done!” Fionn pointed angrily at the scared and angry citizens of Moone.
“All I’ve done is stand up for myself when it’s obvious you don’t believe in my abilities.”
“ENOUGH!” Donnall was surprised by the strength of his own voice. The room went silent with all eyes on him. “Why don’t we all find our beds for the night and let Fionn and Carter work this out between themselves?”
“What about the children?” Padraig shouted from a few tables back.
“Moone will do as it always does in battle. Your children will be protected, Padraig. You have my word.”
“If Fionn’s boy won’t stand up and protect his own children, who will?” a voice called from the back.
Carter opened his mouth to protest and after Donnall shot him a warning glance, shut it again.
“I will handle it. Now off with you all.” Donnall kept his back to his battling friends and watched the room empty. Fianna, Islynn and Cadence remained behind and were standing with their arms wrapped around each other. Donnall raised an eyebrow at the group of women.
“We are a family. We stay,” Fianna moved past Donnall to take a seat at the table on the other side of Fionn.
Cadence nodded and went to Carter. She hugged him and urged him to sit down while she sat next to him. Islynn sat next to Cadence and picked up her friend’s hand.
Donnall had no idea how to fix this fight between Fionn and Carter. He was a warrior not a peacemaker. “Carter, you do not know this, but it is common practice to put a warrior in the council room with the children.”
“I am not a wet nurse!”
“We all know that. When Moone went to war against the McRoths the task of guarding the children went to Padraig whose wife was newly delivered of a son.”
“The women did not fight in that battle. What were they doing if not protecting their own children?”
Donnall sighed. He needed to remember Carter was not from this century and did not know their ways and customs. “It is our custom that the newest father among us guards the children and the women during battle conditions. As you and Fionn are both the newest fathers at Moone, we decided it would be you who would be the children’s last hope of survival.”
“If the enemy breeches the castle’s defenses it means none of us are left standing to protect Moone,” Fionn said gravely. “We station one warrior within the war council chamber. He is all that stands between the enemy and what we hold
most dear.”
Carter looked to Donnall for confirmation.
He nodded curtly and focused his attention on Fionn who was swiping angrily at tears falling down his face to soak into his beard.
“You must guard our children, my heart. I am not questioning your ability to defend Moone, but am asking you to be the last man standing. All that will stand in the way of a complete victory for the English is you and your sword arm.”
Carter ducked his head and buried his face in his hands. Donnall could see his chest hitching.
Donnall turned to the village healer. “Islynn, forgive me for asking, but have you seen any of what’s to come?”
“Only bloodshed. Nothing that will help,” she shivered and closed her eyes. Cadence wrapped an arm around her in comfort.
Donnall took the seat at the table directly in front of Fionn who was twisting his hands together, presumably to keep from reaching out to his angry lover. “You gave me some good advice a few days ago, Fionn.” He couldn’t help grinning when Fionn’s lips twitched.
“What advice was that?” Cadence asked.
“Fionn told me to hold tight to what matters most. In my case what matters most is you. That is why I was out searching for you tonight.”
“It took you two days to take my advice?” Fionn was incredulous.
“I’m just a slow learner, I guess.” Donnall smiled brightly when the ladies burst out laughing. “Now it’s your turn. It is obvious to everyone how much the two of you love each other. Put this misunderstanding behind you before it is too late.”
“As the battle dawns in two days, it would seem tomorrow would be an excellent day for a handfasting,” Fianna said casually.
Carter’s head shot up from his hands. He turned a hopeful look to Fionn whose face was impossible to read.
Fionn untangled his fingers and reached out to Carter who all but flew out of his chair and into Fionn’s lap. “Would you like that, my heart?”
Carter sniffled loudly against Fionn’s chest and nodded his head.