My arrival! I was six weeks premature, and the nurses took this photo of me to show my mum.
Me and big sister Jemma – we were always screaming at each other when we were little.
Happier now!
Nana, me and Jemma – her pride and joys!
Butter wouldn’t melt …
Practising my dance moves.
Nana loved coming with us to Pontins, it was always a big family affair.
With our little brother, Matthew.
Me, in one of my mum’s homemade dresses!
A trophy from my mum and dad as I didn’t win one myself.
Baton twirling, ooo dear!
Still twirling those batons …
A fun day out at Legoland. It wasn’t all Pontins!
Me and Paul! Who would have thought?
A rare moment when we weren’t squabbling.
Having fun at Dad’s photographic studio.
This is what I looked like at drama school – I wonder why I never got any of the lead roles?
Me and my cousin Jo.
My Abbs Cross birthday in the shed.
Mazel Tov to my little brother.
Here come the girls … I was so excited to be a bridesmaid at Dad and Karen’s wedding.
Already a show-off … Singing at Daddy and Karen’s wedding.
The whole family!
K. S.! School two.
I performed in a school concert with my mates Jess and Danni.
Prom Queen, yaay.
Ooo dear, bikini bod, ha ha!
At the Ice Bar in London for a birthday party, wahooo!
Ahh … my beautiful Zachary.
Just after having given birth, and not looking so pretty.
Nan and Daddy with Zachary.
Me, Mummy and a very little Zachary bum at Symonds Yat in the Forest of Dean, Wye Valley.
Zach, love of my life.
Karen (left) and Mummy – great friends.
First audition for the X Factor, eek!! Feeling nervous.
Me and Dannii, BFF! Love her!
X Factor tour fun times.
X Factor finals, wahoo, I’m singing ‘What A Wonderful World’.
Dannii was brilliant with Zach, he completely fell in love with her.
Dannii comes to Dagenham. I’m sure she’d never set foot there before!
My Aaron!
Me on the road, uh oh!!
Best brother and sis ever.
Me and Mum two.
At Soccer 6, with Zach by my side.
Soccer 6 competitive!
Fun with my gorgeous baby.
I’m a Celebrity gang – love ’em all.
Me and Gillers.
A long-awaited kiss. Poor Aaron, I really stank!
Surprise, OMG! Jemma had organized it all brilliantly.
Jemma’s cake for me. See that cute little model of me.
From warring sisters to best friends – I ♥ you, Jemma!
My little prince, at the Palazzo Versace hotel in Australia.
Cuddles on the carpet.
On the panel of Loose Women – what great girls! We had a laugh.
Thank Yous
Zachary – for being the centrepiece of my life, the core of my world of which only good can come. For making me realize the meaning of life. For stopping me from becoming wrapped up in myself and my needs. For saying ‘See ya, wouldn’t wanna be ya,’ every time I leave for work. For loving me all the way around the world and to the stars and back! For being the only living thing on this earth that makes me fill up every time I look at you and try to comprehend just how unbelievable you are, and how lucky I am. For being my most prized possession and most admirable creation. For being my Zachary. I am and always will be in total and utter awe of you.
Dad – for being the backbone of my personality and giving me unconditional love no matter how unloveable I behaved! For telling me I can do and be anything I want to be and for believing in me since the day I was born.
Mum – for being the mother that most people dream about, taking the good times and the bad and smiling at the end of them all. For never being able to celebrate a single birthday until I was sixteen because I was always such a nuisance. For being My Rock, My Voice, My Life, My Mum.
Karen – for meeting my dad and making him a happy man. For taking us all in and adding us to your family. For being my second mum and my only listener throughout everything. For giving me a beautiful, intelligent, gorgeous little brother who makes me and my son very happy.
Jemma – my lovely sister who I have spent three-quarters of my life in petty squabbles with and stealing clothes from. You are the most extraordinary person I’ve ever known, and without you I would not be as grounded and appreciative as I am today. You are an angel.
Matt – my little brother, even though you are six-foot tall and tower over me, you are still my little brother!! You work so hard running my website, constantly nagging me to go on Twitter and Facebook too, that it’s thanks to you the support I have following me and the people who have stuck by my side! You and your dreams make me so proud. I know you are going to be so successful and have such a prosperous life like you deserve!
Nana – my Jewish Bubba who kept me filled to the brim with chicken soup and kneidlach. Who also told me I was the luckiest girl in the world as I had my family – thank you Nana for teaching me the only important thing in life. I still believe it to this day and I miss you with all my heart and soul, and can’t wait to see you again one day.
Granddad – a man who devoted his life to others, called me his shnoggle woggle and always greeted me with a lovely smile and cuddle. The man who taught me respect and discipline and loved me devotedly. Who took me for walks up mountains and on Easter egg hunts, and never let me give up. Thank you, Granddad, I know you are happy wherever you are. We are all looking after Grandma still! I love you, I miss you.
Grandma – for being the most senior lady I know to take the elderly on fun trips and the hard of hearing on regular outings. The lady who devoted her life to her kids, grandkids and husband. Who made my granddad a very happy man, cooking, cleaning and caring for him every day for sixty years! Who makes me want to follow in her footsteps and have the wonderful life that she and my granddad experienced. You are the most lovely lady in the world and I love you very much!
Aaron – I fell in love with you the day I met you and I couldn’t think of my life with anyone else. Thank you for giving me the chance to fall in love, to know what it’s like to feel lost without someone, to be another person’s other half and to spend every living moment sharing everything with someone. For making me laugh when I’m close to tears. For head-locking me when you mean to cuddle me. For not kissing me in front of people, but giving the best kisses. For giving me butterflies every time I know I’m going to see you – even now. I love you. I’m in love with you. I can’t wait to live my life with you and grow old with you. Grandma and grandpa Barham.
Lee Lee – for doing everything for my sister and my mum. For caring about others’ comforts over your own. For fixing the garden and loft house, even though it makes my boyfriend look as lazy as he is. I love you x
My family – to anyone I haven’t mentioned, all of my family have influenced my life so greatly and I wouldn’t be 1 per cent of the person that I am today without any of you. I love you all so much and wish that one day I can do the same back to you all. Marilyn, Robert, Sonny, Anna, Elliot, Daniel, Alison, Steve, Joanne, Robin, Elias, Donna, Michael, John, Wendy, Heather, Jim, Nick, Jen, Mary, Dave, Vicky, Chloe and Emily.
Ree and Stu – Mum and Dad No. 2 – for the minute I stormed into your lives and turned your world into an unorganized mess looking after me. For taking me everywhere, dealing with my monthlies, paying my parking tickets, washing my drawers, making my bed and cooking my dinner! But most of all for making me laugh every time I step through the door and sit down.
Dyl and Bas – for always having us round to lunch and for making my Malibu and Coke a glass
of Malibu! For texting me every time you think of me and Zachary, and always trying to see us and make us happy!
Friends
Dayna Lauren, Danni and James – for being the friends who have stuck by me from the very beginning. The friends who when I haven’t rung, they call. When I haven’t visited, they visit and when I need them, they are there. The best friends. I love you all with every inch of me!
Dicki – the person unmentioned in this book, but who is a massive part of my life – for being the boy who has never stopped dipping in and out of my world and making it the funniest and happiest times!
Tubs, Hank, Hurricane Rae, Krust, Jorden, Jade, Debbie and Mole – the new friends who feel like they’ve been there for ever and treat me like I’ve known them all my life! Love them to pieces and can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with them all. Roll on BBQ season!!
Ben – my first ever manager in the whole world! For being the man who had 100 per cent belief in me. The man who pushed me up when everyone else pushed me down and who convinced others to believe in me – thank you for everything.
Modest – for being a part of the path that led me to where I am now. For that I am very grateful.
Tour Managers Jerome, Lance and Tobias – for driving me around while I drove you all mad!! For eating M&S when all you wanted was Burger King! For including my family and friends in everything we did.
Rebecca – who had to suffer all the late nights and long hours working on this book! Not only that, she had to turn my verbal diarrhoea into 100,000 words!! and had to meet me at the most annoying and inappropriate times, no doubt finding it very difficult to arrange even those meetings! What a masterpiece you have created, thank you so much, you are a great writer and I am so privileged to have worked with you!
Everyone at the wonderful Penguin for giving me the opportunity to write this book. It means so much to me. You have been a part of ensuring I will never, ever forget these most special and important memories now that they are not only catalogued in my brain, which isn’t always reliable, but thanks to you in hard copy as well, which will stay on the Solomon shelf for ever and ever! I am so grateful, thank you! What an amazing journey this has been for me – I’ve enjoyed every step of it.
Photo Credits
All photographs courtesy of the author except:
First audition for the X Factor.
© Ken McKay/Talkback Thames/Rex Features
X Factor finals, wahoo.
© Ken McKay/Talkback Thames/Rex Features
X Factor tour fun times.
© Getty Images
I’m a Celebrity gang, love ’em all.
© Rex Features
Me and Gillers.
© Rex Features
A long-awaited kiss.
© Photograph by SCAR/ Camera Press London
My little prince.
© Photograph by SCAR/ Camera Press London
Cuddles on the carpet.
© Matt Crossick/Empics Entertainment
On the panel of Loose Women.
© Ken McKay/Rex Features
Stacey: My Story So Far Page 26