I cut straight to the point. “Michelle, I'm not up for the chitchat. “Can I just get a double scotch, neat?”
“Sorry.” She raised her hands in defeat.
Michelle is cute, I thought as she poured my drink. I could easily forget Brielle with her. I shook my head, pushed the thought away. Michelle wasn't what I wanted. It didn't matter how hard I tried. Even when I was infuriated, Brielle was what I craved. I tossed my drink back, letting the amber liquid burn.
“Another.”
Michelle raised her eyebrows. She paused as she seemed to contemplate pouring the next shot. I pushed my keys toward her.
“I won't be driving home. So pour another shot . . . please.”
By the fifth drink, I didn’t give a fuck about anything or anyone. Fuck her. If that’s who she wanted, he could have her.
“Nathaniel.” I heard my name spoken sweetly as she approached my side.
“What are you doing here, Delaney?” I needed to be alone. I didn’t want to see anyone who reminded me of Brielle.
“Michelle called your girlfriend when she noticed how much alcohol you consumed in such a short span of time.” She lowered her lips to my ear. “Apparently, not everybody knows what a douchebag you are. Breaking up with your girl the day before Christmas is pretty assholish, if you ask me.”
I sighed and rested my head on the cool wooden bar top. “I'm sorry, Del.” It was yet another thing I’d done to be with Brielle. But in the end, it had all backfired. “It was fucked up of me. You were always good to me,” I slurred.
Delaney laughed and slid onto the stool next to me. “You must be really drunk if you're apologizing.”
I nodded and for the first time looked over at her. Her makeup was freshly done, and her long black hair was pin straight. Her hand brushed across my cheek.
“So, what has you drinking like a fish?”
“Nothing.” I pulled away from her touch and looked over at Michelle. “Happy you called me a ride home? Can I have my drink now?” From the corner of my eye, I noticed Delaney nod.
I downed another drink and turned to face Delaney. “You want to get out of here?” It was the stupidest thing to do, but I was in no shape to make wise decisions.
“Are you asking me . . .” A smile widened on her face.
“Don't play coy, Del. It doesn’t suit you. By the way you're dressed, I know you didn't come here to save me. I know when your lips are red with that lipstick, it means you're horny. So I'm asking you again, you want to get out of here and fuck?”
“Wow.” She paused and studied my face. “Something has you all twisted, huh?” She inched closer to me. “Are you having girl problems, Moosey?”
“It’s a simple question, Del.”
She looked over at Michelle. They exchanged a few words and Delaney slipped her my credit card. “Let's go.” Her lips puckered and she handed me my wallet.
I didn't make it out of the bar. Instead, I held Delaney’s hand and dragged her into the bathroom. It wasn't what I wanted, but it was what I needed. She would make me forget Brielle, even if it was only for a moment.
I pressed her against the door and locked it, kissing her like a savage, desperate to escape reality.
Delaney moaned and whimpered as I pressed my erection against her. She was all too eager, her hands sliding between us and gripping my cock through my jeans.
I moved her to the sink. “Turn around.”
Delaney rested her hands on the sink and pushed her ass toward me. Lifting her skirt, I admired the lace strip that slipped into her ass crack. When we first started dating, I told her they were my favorite. I unbuttoned my jeans and pulled out my cock, stroking until it was fully erect. My fingers curled around her thong and pulled it to the side as Delaney bent forward, giving me access to her already wet pussy. Our eyes locked in the mirror and I pushed deep inside, ignoring the banging on the door as I continued to thrust harder and faster.
“Hold on, baby,” I grunted. “This is going to be quick.” Delaney rested her hands against the mirror and pushed back on my cock.
This was how I would forget Brielle. You forgot one woman by burying yourself in another.
Ignoring everything Delaney was moaning, I pulled out and came on her ass. It wasn’t nearly as satisfying as it was with Brielle. Nothing would be as good as her. Delaney looked at me through the mirror. “That's all you got?”
I shook my head. “That's just the beginning.”
My alcohol daze gut-punched me when I walked outside into the fresh air and I stumbled to Delaney's car. She opened the passenger door for me and I sank in.
That was the last thing I remembered.
The following morning, I woke up to a throbbing headache. I turned to the other side of my bed and noticed I wasn't alone. Delaney was curled up next to me, and I wasn’t wearing anything.
Fuck.
“Morning.” She greeted me with a smile.
Mentally, I cursed myself. What the fuck had I done? “Morning.” My voice was hoarse. “You spent the night?”
“Yes, silly.” She kissed my bare chest. “You couldn't keep your hands off me. At one point I thought I’d have to pull over since you kept trying to take my clothes off in the car.” She giggled. I swallowed back and prayed my nausea would subside. “I must say, Nate, even when we were together you never made love to me like that.” Her stare lingered on mine. “It was as though you couldn't get enough.”
It wasn't that I couldn't get enough of her. It was that I was trying to forget her best friend.
“I'm sorry. I tried to pull free from her. “I shouldn't have.”
“There's no need to apologize.” She shook her head. “I'm not asking for you to come back to me, Nathaniel. It was a fun night. If you want to have some more fun, call me later.” She kicked the covers off her naked body and strolled across the room to where her clothes had been left on the floor. She slid her skirt up her legs and pulled her shirt over her head.
Delaney walked back to my bed and kissed me on the cheek. “If you find my thong, keep it. I think you tore it to pieces anyway.” She turned on her heel and walked out of the room.
I had royally fucked everything up. But it was all Brielle’s fault, and I’d make sure she got a piece of my mind.
A few hours later, I was somewhat sober. A faint headache lingered but it was tolerable as I hopped in the car, determined to track Brielle down.
It didn't take me long to spot her car outside the library. I stormed through the entire building, looking in every corner for her, but it wasn't until Terry informed me she was in the common hall studying that I found her. She sat on an oversized couch, her headphones plugged in her ears as she typed on the keypad of her laptop. I dropped into the chair across from her and kicked my leg up on the small wooden table.
Our gazes met and her lips puckered with disgust. Funny thing was, I felt the exact same way. Last time I saw her lips they were pressed against my brother.
When neither of us spoke, she resumed her attention on her screen.
“Don't you think you owe me an explanation?” I asked.
A sly grin appeared on her face and I knew she had heard my question. She pulled the headphones from her ears and cocked her head to the side “I owe you an explanation?”
“Yes, I believe so, especially since the last time I saw you, you were fucking my brother.” The words slid out of my mouth like venom.
“Correction.” She lifted a finger at me. “Last time you saw me, I was kissing your brother. I didn't fuck him, but you fucked my best friend.” Shocked, my words failed me. “Oh, did you think I didn't know?” Her voice was sweet but laced with sarcasm. “I spent an entire day worried about you, only to have my best friend come home and inform me that during your Easter bash she spent the night in your bed.” She cracked her knuckles and her nostrils flared with anger. “You didn't even have the courtesy to return a single phone call or text message to tell me you were no longer interested in me. Instead, you simpl
y traded me for a different version.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “I didn't fuck Delaney at the Easter bash. I didn't return your phone call because I was locked in my room, so sick that Stu had to go to the clinic and pick me up a Z-Pak. That's why I didn't return your calls. And because I dropped my phone in the sink.”
“That’s a good excuse. You couldn’t ask Stu to pick up a new phone for you?”
“I didn’t call you for what? Thirty-six hours? You didn’t hear from me for a day and a half, and that was enough for you to doubt me completely? You automatically think I’m making excuses? I was sick!” My voice grew with anger.
“You fucked her! She came home and told me everything!” People were beginning to stare in our direction.
“I didn't fuck Delaney at that party. “My head shook and anger swooshed between my ears. “I was fucking sick as a dog, Brielle. But I fucked her last night after I saw you with my brother.”
She paused for a second, her eyes scanning mine as the words registered in her head. “What?”
“If you would’ve given me the benefit of the doubt and answered me when I called you back, when I emailed you, when I showed up at my brother’s house, this could've all been avoided.”
“Bastard.” Her words were like venom. “You're telling me it's my fault that you tripped and fell inside her pussy?”
“No.” I shook my head. “It's your fault that you broke my heart the second you got on top of his dick.”
I watched as her eyes glistened with unshed tears. “I didn't break your heart. You broke mine. I was the stupid one who trusted you to begin with.”
“No, Brie. You were the one who chose to believe your roommate instead of coming to me. You were the one who sat on top of Julian and, once Edwin opened the door, you didn't even budge. You were the one who ruined this.”
She slammed her laptop shut. “Really?” A tear dripped down her cheek and instantly my anger faded away. “A kiss is forgivable. I kissed your brother because I was hurt. And since I hurt you, did you only kiss Delaney?” Her voice broke and she shook her head. “No, you fucked her.”
It was my turn to remain quiet. She wiped away the tears that slid down her cheeks. “You know, the funny thing is I never had sex with your brother, even when I was his girlfriend. I couldn't have sex with him because all I wanted was you. But even when you were with Delaney, you fucked her, so I guess fucking her now was like riding a bike.” I wanted to reach out and hug her, but she was too upset. “Don't sit here and tell me I ruined us. Because we were ruined the second you started dating her.” She shoved her things into her bag and stood to leave, but I grasped her arm.
“Wait.” I tried to stop her. “Wait! Wait! I fucked up. We can fix this. It didn’t mean anything.”
“Is this where you tell me you thought of me the whole time?”
“Fuck, Brie.” My hand ran through my hair nervously. “I was hurt, pissed off, and drunk out of my face. You have to forgive me, you gotta understand. I thought—”
“Don't touch me,” she sobbed. “You didn't come here to apologize. You came here for revenge. You came here to tell me that you slept with her. You wanted to even the score. You see, Nate, you and I are very much alike in some ways because that's what I wanted to do last night with Julian. I wanted to sleep with him so you’d know how much you hurt me. But I couldn't go through with it because I'm a fool who thought we were in love.”
“Brie, I was drunk.”
“So was I, but I still didn't fuck him.” She tugged on her arm, but I couldn't let her go. It felt as if she was slipping from my grasp and I would lose her completely.
“Don't leave.”
“Let go of my arm or I'll scream.” Her gaze was locked on mine, and I could see the hatred in her eyes.
I gradually released my grip and watched as she slipped away. I did the only thing I could not to lose her.
I followed her.
Chapter 18
Brielle
I wandered aimlessly for what seemed like hours. I didn't know where to go or what to think, but as long as one foot was in front of the other, everything else was a complete blur. My heart ached and the tears wouldn’t stop streaming down my face. How had I been so stupid? My own insecurities had me acting like a child, and it was my own doing that led him straight back to her arms.
That realization only made me sob harder.
His words ran over and over in my head. I didn't know what to feel. Could I be mad at him for being with Delaney?
Yes.
No.
Who the fuck knew?
I had given him the knife to stab my own heart. That I knew.
My feet throbbed as I lapped the campus for the fourth time. Needing to escape the hell I was in, I got in the car and slammed my hands on the steering wheel.
“Damn you!”
I hated that I had fallen so deeply for him. Never had I loved so deeply. So profoundly. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I grew.
Thirty minutes later, I pulled into Lake Norman. This time, the sky was crystal blue and the trees were blooming as spring was upon us, but I felt cold, dark and hurt. Parking near the water, I got out of the car and sat at the edge of the lake. The water was cool and calm as I reflected on my life. I had been steady and serene most of life, just like this lake. My father, my mother, and my entire childhood had all been boulders that made a tremendous splash, but with time, the ripples all evened out. Now, I felt like the ocean in the middle of typhoon with wild and disastrous winds destroying everything in its path.
My hands brushed the soft grass until I found a small stone. I held it firmly between my fingers the way Nate taught me and threw it in the lake. It only bounced once before it sank to the bottom. My eyes filled with tears. Could I do anything right?
“You're doing it wrong.” I heard Nate's voice behind me.
My vision blurred with tears as I sat motionless and hoped it was all in my head; that he wasn't really here. But when he lowered himself beside me, there was no denying that the man who held the key to my heart was right where I needed him.
Neither of us said a word for long moments as we quietly watched the calm body of water. I hugged my legs and rested my chin on my knees. I prayed for the tears to stay in, but the traitorous fucks decided to pour out anyway.
Nate draped his arm over me and pulled me toward his chest.
“Shh,” he whispered and kissed the top of my head, but that only made me cry more. Why had I been so stupid?
After a few minutes, my tears subsided and I pulled away, keeping my head lowered.
“Talk to me,” he said, finally breaking the silence.
“What is there to say?” My voice was low and hoarse, my gaze refusing to pull away from where the lake and shore met.
“Say anything.”
“It's karma.”
“What is?” I felt his body shift toward mine.
“I'm being punished for what I did to Julian and Delaney. This is my payback.”
“Don't say that.” He pulled me into his arms. “It was a misunderstanding.”
I shook my head. “And where do we go from here. We make pretend that you didn't sleep with her?”
Nate waited a few seconds before he responded. “I guess you're right.”
I knew I was right. There was no way I could get over this. Him being with Delaney was a thick pill to swallow.
“We can be friends,” I suggested. It was a lie. We could never just be friends. Never.
“I don't want to be your friend. I love you too damn much.”
“Nate.” I shook my head as new tears threatened to fall.
“Brie.” He said my name gently and cupped my face. “We were never conventional. And nothing can come between us that will make me stop loving you any less. It might take time for us to get over this bump but we will get over it.”
I nodded. My heart was in knots and every fiber in my soul was petrified, but I loved this man more than an
ything. I knew he was right.
Closing my eyes, I prayed we would overcome this.
Chapter 19
Brielle
The friendship I had with Delaney instantly changed.
It was funny how a man could come between two girls. In a blink of an eye, things seemed completely different. At first, I blamed myself for everything. It wasn't her fault I fell in love with him, but then I realized she lied to me. She told me she spent the night with Nate, and I later discovered that wasn’t true. Why lie? What else had she lied to me about?
It burned like hell when I walked into my dorm room after my conversation with Nate. The images of them together would forever haunt me. It wasn't her fault I fell in love with him, but our friendship had shifted. There were too many lies between us now, and when you can't confide in your best friend . . .
“You've been gone all day.” Delaney hit the mute button on the TV when I walked in.
“Finals are approaching,” I said with a sigh.
“I thought we could study together.” She looked up at me with hopeful eyes. “Go to the diner and drink so much coffee we’re up all night.” She shifted her feet and sat on them. Delaney knew all my deepest, darkest secrets, yet in that moment she felt like a complete stranger. “You know, like we always do.”
“Sorry. I was helping other people study.” I strolled across the room and dropped my heavy body on top of my bed.
My eyes were closed, but I heard her moving toward me. “I have to tell you what happened to me last night.” My eyes flew open.
I held my hands up to stop her from continuing. I didn't want the details of her and Nate’s sexcapades. “Can we talk about it another time?” She stopped dead in her tracks, confusion spread across her face. I’d never said no to her. “I'm really drained and I don't feel very well.”
“Oh, okay.” She sat on the edge of my bed. “Do you want me to grab you something to eat?”
“No.” I covered my eyes with my forearm as tears threatened to fall again. “I don't have much of an appetite. I just really want to sleep.” Shifting on my side, I faced the wall. The painful tears that had threatened began to stream down my face. I couldn't stop the hurt. There was so much pain in it all that I needed a few more days to get back to normal.
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