by S. E. Lund
"How could you hear anything?" I said, smiling at her, trying to put on a good front despite finding her sandwiched between two artists who were much younger than me. I slipped my arms around her waist, pulling her against my body.
"What time is it?"
I smiled. "It's 1:30."
She inhaled sharply. "I forgot to check. Have you been waiting long?"
I shook my head. "I decided to come by and see what was going on. I figured you were otherwise occupied and just forgot about the time."
"I did. I was so busy putting on the gesso I lost track of time. Forgive me?"
I kissed her quickly. "Nothing to forgive. Let's go. Unless you want to stay…"
She shook her head. "No, let's go. I can't do anything until the coat dries. I have to finish cleaning up first."
I released her and she went back to the sink to finish drying off the brushes. I moved a bit closer and glanced at Nathaniel and then the other man, trying not to laugh out loud at the two of them.
The other man with long hair to his waist held the roach out to me. "Have a toke, man," he said.
I shook my head and held my hand up, palm out. "Thanks, but no."
He shrugged and sauntered back to his studio.
Kate said goodbye to Nathaniel, thanking him for helping her with the canvases and we left. She asked me how my morning went and I described trying to find something to do while she was busy. When we arrived at the car, I opened the door for her and then went around to the driver's side.
"Did you smoke pot with them?" I asked, trying to keep my voice light.
She glanced at me. "No," she said. "I'm not really much of a pot smoker. Never did like it. Besides, with the hanging judge for a father? No way…"
I smiled in relief. I didn’t like the thought she was getting stoned with anyone else but me, my jealousy rearing its ugly head once more.
"You looked right in your element at the studio with that paint on your apron and cheek," I said and reached over to touch her skin. "You looked really happy."
"I was. I am," she said and took my hand. "I haven't even started on the work but it feels so good to be doing art again."
I squeezed her hand, knowing I had to swallow my petty jealousies over Kate being alone with men who were more her age. This made her happy and a happy Kate was my goal in life, even if it meant I had to let her outside my immediate control. It was hard, but I fought my Dom tendencies as much as possible outside the bedroom.
After we returned to the apartment, we sat on the couch and watched the news, cups of tea in our hands.
Later in the afternoon, Maureen called, asking me to come by to talk about Liam’s case.
"She wants me to come by to talk about Liam," I said to Kate. She was in the kitchen trying to decide what to cook for our supper.
"Do you have the memento you wanted to give to him?"
I nodded. "Yes, I'll bring it along. I hope she lets him have it. I don't know what cover story she can give him, but it should be his."
"What is it, if you don't mind me asking?" she said, trying to sound casual but I knew she was curious.
"A picture of Liam outside a field hospital in Vietnam receiving the Medal of Honor for saving the lives of two soldiers who were in a burning helicopter that crashed.” I thought about the picture I had always treasured. “I hope that, one day, Maureen will show it to him and let him know who his real father and family were."
Kate said nothing but I could see doubt in her eyes. "Speaking of later tonight, I was thinking about supper," she said, as if trying to change the subject. "The fridge is pretty empty. Should we have supper with my father and Elaine? Or would you rather stay here?"
I shrugged. "Up to you. I am entirely at your command."
Kate hesitated. "Let's go to my father's for dinner. Once we go, I won't see them for six months, so it would be nice to see them as much as possible."
"Fine with me."
Kate left the kitchen and called her father to make arrangements. Then, she and I spent the afternoon listening to news of an earthquake in China, lounging around, reading the paper and talking about the trip. Doing ordinary things that couples did.
I hadn’t done them with a woman for years, and it felt perfect.
CHAPTER FOUR
The afternoon passed quickly and soon it was time for us to get ready for dinner at Ethan’s. While I dressed in the bedroom, Kate was doing her makeup in the bathroom. I watched her from where I stood by my chest of drawers and was amazed that she was mine. She had no real idea how delicious she was with her curves and milky skin and breathless desire for submission. Although I felt an incredible need for her body, it was her mind that captivated me. She wanted to be taken places sexually she was too afraid to go on her own. She needed a dominant man for that.
I was perfect for her and she for me.
I went into the bathroom while she was bending over, pulling up her stockings, and the sight of her bare ass was far too tempting to merely watch. I wanted to feel her body against mine and run my hands over her skin so I grabbed hold of her hips and pulled her against my body.
"Ms. Bennet, when you stand like that, with just your garter belt and your bra, I'm unable to resist you." She tried to stand up, but I stopped her, wanting her to remain in that position while I enjoyed the view. "No, stay like this for a moment. I like this position. I'm getting ideas…"
Kate glanced up into the mirror and our eyes met. She smiled as I ran my hands over her back to her buttocks, pulling her against my groin and my growing erection. I wasn’t planning on fucking her at that moment, but I wanted to enjoy her luscious body and most of all, my complete freedom to touch it and arouse it and play with it whenever I chose.
I released her and she stood facing the mirror with me behind her. Our eyes met once more in the mirror and she watched as I stroked her belly with one hand and cupped a full breast with the other. She was mine – all mine. I exhaled and bent down to kiss her shoulder then slid my hands down her arms to clasped her hands in mine, our fingers entwining. We stood like that for a few moments, my cheek resting on her shoulder. I wanted her every moment of the day, but what I first took as sexual need was now transforming into a need just for her presence. To touch her and have her close.
"Well, as much as I'd love to fuck you right now, I guess we better get going," I said and released her hands. "Don't want to keep your father waiting."
Kate nodded without a word, although I was pretty sure I had aroused her with my touch. Still, she didn’t protest or push for sex. Instead, she resumed dressing, my good little sexual submissive.
Exactly what I needed.
Exactly what I most wanted.
I felt a tiny bit selfish, but I knew that for Kate, I was what she needed and wanted as well.
When we arrived at Ethan’s, he and Elaine were sitting in the living room, drinking cocktails and listening to some music on the sound system.
"Come in you two," Ethan said in his gravelly voice. "What can I get for you?"
I held up my hand. "Let me bartend," I said and went behind the bar. I opened the small bar fridge and removed Yelena Kuznetsova's shot glasses and poured two shots of Anisovaya, then brought them over to the couches by the fireplace. I handed one to Kate and then held up my glass.
"To us," I said.
"To us," Ethan replied. We toasted each other and then Kate and I shot back the vodka.
Kate sat on the couch beside Elaine and I sat beside Kate, my arm possessively around her back.
"We've been so looking forward to dinner tonight," Elaine said. "We thought you two would be gone in a few days. We're glad we'll have you here for a few more weeks, even though the circumstances aren’t happy."
"I'm happy to stay for as long as Drake wants," Kate replied. "Everything's packed and repacked and repacked again. We have our passports and Drake has his papers and offers of employment so as soon as Drake's ready, we can go."
"So Drake," Ethan said, turning h
is attention to me. "You're still going to be able to teach?"
"Luckily yes," I said. "The third semester starts in March. I'm going to teach two courses in the Masters of Medicine Neurosurgery program. One is intro to neurosurgery and the other is for 6th year students and was the final neurosurgery course in the program. It's called HMS 1001:Principles and Practices of Neurosurgery and focuses on the kind of surgery I do at Columbia. Stereotactic surgery for epilepsy and deep brain stimulation for Parkinson's and other movement disorders."
"Are they lectures or is there actual surgery involved?"
"Both," I replied, eager to teach the classes. "Lectures, demonstrations, and surgical rotations with me. It's really hands-on at this point. The final course is taught in the last year of their neurosurgery program so they're almost finished."
"You must be pleased."
"Very. I've wanted to go and teach there for a while. Ever since I did some volunteer work a couple of years ago."
"Sad that you have to cancel the surgery you’ve got lined up."
I shrugged, although I felt bad for Michael. He had such need for support, especially when it was mainly wealthy doctors like me who could afford to put a practice on hold and volunteer our services. "It'll be hard for them to find someone qualified to take over on such short notice, but it's my son."
"Do you like to teach?" Elaine said, as if trying to change the subject.
"Love it," I said, as I took Kate’s hand in mine and gave it a squeeze. "I love teaching almost as much as doing. I love to watch students develop their skills, discover new knowledge, improve. And Kenya has a severe shortage of neurosurgeons, so this is important work getting more students to graduate. I'll get privileges and will be on call in the ER and scheduled surgeries. I'll be really busy, but hopefully not too busy or Kate will get really bored." I turned to her. "But she's started painting again, so maybe we'll get her some studio space and she can work on a collection while we're there."
Kate smiled back at me. "Thank you," she said and kissed me on the cheek.
Ethan turned to her, smiling broadly. "Well, that's just great," he said. "I'd love to see some new work from you, sweetie. What are you working on?"
"It's a secret," Kate said. "A gift."
"For Drake?"
She shook her head "No, for me."
"Be mysterious," Ethan said, shaking his head. "I can't wait to see it, whatever it is."
Elaine and Ethan seemed pleased that we were together, that we were going to Africa, and that Kate would start painting again. It was almost enough to wash away the darkness inside of me as I worried about Liam and whether the treatment would work. I pulled Kate a bit closer, and she responded by snuggling into my embrace. If it wasn’t for Liam’s illness, I didn’t think I could be any happier.
The meal was catered and was delicious. Kate and Elaine discussed the food while Ethan and I caught up on how his campaign plans were progressing. I related how I was wrapping things up at the hospital, the Foundation and the Corporation.
Beside me, Kate seemed especially happy to be with her father and Elaine. I watched her drink a bit more than usual, amused that she was getting a nice buzz from the wine.
When we were alone for a few minutes, while Ethan left for his office and Elaine went to the kitchen to fix us tea, I leaned over to Kate.
"You're flushing from the wine. You look very alluring. I wish I could take you home right now instead of going to meet Maureen. Later," I said. "We'll do something special."
After tea and some more discussion of life in general, we said goodbye to Ethan and Elaine and I led a slightly tipsy Kate down to the parking garage. Kate tripped and laughed when I caught her, steadying her against my body.
"You and high heels," I said. "I'll have to make sure you always wear them when we go out so you'll remind me of our first meeting in the bar."
I helped her into the car and buckled her seatbelt while she sat with her eyes closed, smiling. She actually giggled when I adjusted the shoulder belt, and my hand brushed her breast. She opened her eyes and stared into mine.
"You're drunk, Ms. Bennet. I’ll have to find a way to take advantage of you tonight."
"Mmm," she said, closing her eyes again. "I like it when you take advantage of me."
"You'll be an even easier lay, with all that wine in you."
"An easy lay?" she said with mock-affront. "May I remind you that you went to a lot of effort to finally succeed in ravishing me?"
I laughed and went around to the driver's side. "I did go to a lot of effort. You're worth every ounce."
Once back at the apartment in Chelsea, I helped Kate with her coat and heels, and carried her to the living room. I lowered her to the couch, and went to the kitchen to pour her some water and get her two aspirin.
"Take these," I said, handing them to her. "Drink up. I'm going to fuck you when I get back from seeing Maureen. I want you wide-awake and responsive. No falling asleep or I might have to spank your cute little round ass."
She leaned her head back against the couch. "I didn't like it when you spanked me at the dungeon party," she said. "I thought I might like it, but I didn't."
"That was a punishment spanking,” I said. “It's not supposed to feel good. I'm glad you don't like it. We would likely never have clicked if you had enjoyed it."
She nodded, and took the aspirin, then drank down the rest of the water.
"I'll make you a cup of coffee before I go. I want you to sober up a bit." I went to the kitchen and prepared her a cup and then kissed her goodbye. "Wait up for me. I probably won't be too long."
"I will."
I left Kate alone on the couch and took my car to NYP to see Maureen. In my pocket was the picture of my father receiving the medal of honor in Vietnam and a news clipping telling the story. I would give it to Maureen and ask that she show it to Liam and make up some story about how the man in the photo was a relative without directly naming him or his relationship to Liam. I wanted him to know who his forefathers were. If I couldn’t know Liam, I wanted him to know about me and especially about his grandfather. Neither of us were inconsequential men. I thought we were both men of which he could be proud.
As I arrived at NYP, I felt certain that Maureen would grudgingly take the picture and news clipping, show them to Liam and just keep the details sketchy. After all, I was undergoing a medical procedure that was meant to save her son’s life. I felt it was the least she could do.
Sadly, I was wrong.
I met them on the ward and went in to see Liam.
“You can see him now, when he’s sleeping,” Maureen said, “but after this, I don’t want you to come back. I’m only letting you see him now in case he dies before you leave for Africa.”
I nodded without really thinking about it, so glad to have the chance to see him without having to sneak around. The three of us gowned up and went into Liam’s room. He was as pale and fragile as before, his skin so thin it seemed almost translucent, and he had so little body fat that I could see veins in his scalp and the outline of his skull.
I stood by the bed and watched him breathe, filled with a profound sense of loss. Here was my father’s grandson—the grandson he never knew about or met. Here was the son conceived with the woman I though I’d spend the rest of my life with.
I’d blown it so badly.
I took Liam’s hand and mercifully, he didn’t wake up, for Maureen stepped closer when she saw me, and I knew she didn’t approve of me touching him. For God’s sake—did she think I was contagious or something?
We finally left the ward and went down to the café. We each got a coffee and then sat at a table by the window.
“What’s that?” Maureen said when I reached into my pocket and withdrew the envelope.
“It’s a photograph of my father,” I said and handed it to her, “receiving the Medal of Honor for saving the lives of two soldiers in a helicopter crash. I want Liam to have it. I’d like you to show it to him so he knows what kin
d of man his grandfather was.”
She took the envelope but didn’t even bother to open it, staring at it like it contained a contract for her soul directly from Satan. She glanced up at me and then at Chris, who frowned. She shook her head, shoving the envelope back at me.
“I can’t take this. Drake, I told you. Chris is his father, not you. All you contributed was a single cell. Chris has been there right from the beginning.”
“How can you say that? That single cell is why Liam is alive today,” I said, anger welling up inside of me.
“It’s also because of you that he has cancer in the first place,” Chris said from across the table.
I fisted my hands, biting back an angry retort. “Life’s like that. The good comes with the bad.”
“Drake, why are you doing this? I though you agreed to say out of Liam’s life.”
“Until he’s old enough to understand—“
“Which won’t be until he’s eighteen,” Chris said, interrupting me. “Thirteen years from now.”
“I won’t try to contact him until then but you could always tell him about his family—“
“He’s already met his family,” Maureen said, her voice shaking. “Chris’s family. My family. You’re no part of it. You haven’t been and you won’t be. This donation changes nothing. You agreed to be an anonymous donor.”
“Maureen, he’ll figure it out eventually. If he learns his blood type, he’ll figure out that he’s not Chris’s son. I’m A positive, you’re A positive, and Chris is B. That alone will prove that he’s not Chris's.”
“Why would he ever have to learn his blood type?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know but they learn about blood type in science class in school.”
“We’ll deal with it when we have to. Right now, I want you to just let this go. Don’t try to see him again, okay? He’s too sick for anything too disrupting. Surely you can understand that.”
I nodded, angered but not wanting to be insensitive.