Fatal Fairies (Renaissance Faire Mystery Book 8)

by Joyce Lavene

  I wasn’t a fan of steak and kidney pie, so I just had a salad and some bread. I liked the coarse grain bread Ginny’s people made here. It was like a meal in itself.

  Two tough-looking pirates got up from their seats and stood beside ours after Ginny had left to get our orders. I didn’t recognize them from my time on the Queen’s Revenge. I thought they might not be in my Village at all.

  “So yer the new law in town.” The pirate’s gold teeth glinted in the lantern light.

  “That’s right.” I wasn’t afraid of pirates, not even ones I’d never met. Mostly they were a lot of bluster.

  “And who’s this?” The second pirate glared at Chase with one eye covered by a black patch with a skull on it. “Is this your pretty lady, Bailiff?”

  I got to my feet. “What’s your problem? I think you need to go back to your ship before I have to lock you up in the Dungeon.”

  “We’re both so scared we’re shaking,” the first pirate said.

  Chase stood up too, much taller and broader than the pirates. “Maybe you had too much to drink and you didn’t understand what the Bailiff said. Go away before you get hurt.”

  The two pirates glanced at him and slunk away. That made me angry.

  “I really need a sword or something. People aren’t going to respect me without a weapon.”

  We sat again in time for Ginny to bring food.

  Chase waited until she was gone. “You’ll get a reputation after a while. People might not be afraid of you, but they’ll respect you.”

  “Especially when you’re with me?”

  He covered my hand with his on the table. “It won’t be like that—unless you’re going to give up being Bailiff when Canyon gets back.”

  “You mean if he gets back. Right now, we don’t have anything to prove he didn’t kill the fairy or Jordan.”

  “But he didn’t kill the squire,” Chase argued. “I think that’s what we should concentrate on. The two were killed in a similar way, right? But we know Canyon was in jail and couldn’t kill Jordan.”

  “But if we can find out who killed Jordan, we might have Apple Blossom’s killer too.”

  “That’s right.” He put a large spoonful of steak and kidney pie in his mouth and chewed thoughtfully. “What’s next? Since we haven’t been able to figure out who told Jordan to throw away that armor, where do we go?”

  “I don’t know.” I sighed. Wasn’t this enough? Chase and I had a relationship again. We were trying to find the killer together. Why wasn’t this over? How much more did it take?

  “We’ll think of something,” he encouraged. “You’re going to be the best Bailiff ever.”

  “Thanks.” That wasn’t my goal, but I had to settle for it since I couldn’t tell him the truth.

  We finished eating, almost in peace and quiet, except for Ginny continuing to butt into our conversation. She constantly felt the need to squeeze Chase’s arm and put her hand on his back and shoulder.

  Dinner was finally over. The tavern was nearly empty. Chase paid for the meal, and we walked out.

  “Doesn’t that bother you?” I asked him when I was sure Ginny wasn’t listening. “She kept touching you. It’s as bad as Gus pinching butts.”

  He smiled as he slipped an arm around me. “Jealous?”

  “Annoyed.”

  “It doesn’t bother me. She’s a good-hearted woman. She means well.”

  Yeah. Yeah.

  By this time, the guitar player had stopped for the night. I could still hear the elephants bellowing and the camels and horses snorting. The people sounds had mostly vanished as the night had cooled and residents went inside. The wind came from the Atlantic with a strong scent of fish and salt. I could still smell sunblock from visitors who had been there that day.

  We didn’t talk much as we wandered back to the castle, enjoying each other’s company. Most of the castle lights had been turned off for the night leaving pockets of darkness that pooled around us.

  The attack came swiftly. Chase groaned and dropped to his knees as someone hit him in the head with something hard. I couldn’t tell what it was or who was doing it.

  Another person grabbed me and twisted my arms behind me. I struggled, but the person was large and strong—Apple Blossom’s killer?

  “We don’t want no lady Bailiff,” a raspy voice said near my ear. “Take care of the camels and the kids who get lost. Let the police take care of the rest.”

  “Why? Because you killed Apple Blossom and the squire to hide your crime?”

  “I’m warning you. Leave it alone.”

  “No.” I knocked my head into his face as I’d frequently had to do to get away from my brother when we were kids. The satisfying oof sound came from behind me, and my attacker stepped back.

  The two men ran away, vanishing into the darkness. I went to Chase. He was okay, just stunned. My arms felt like they’d nearly been twisted out of their sockets.

  “They got away?” Chase asked as I helped him to his feet.

  “They did. But one of them is going to have a big bruise on his face tomorrow. I’m pretty sure it was those two pirates from inside.”

  “They won’t be so tough when I see them in the daylight tomorrow.”

  “Let’s get back to the castle. We need to make sure he didn’t crack your head open.”

  “I’m fine. Just feel kind of stupid. I guess I’m good with a pretend sword and lance, but not in a real fight.”

  “He came up and hit you in the back of the head,” I reminded him. “I couldn’t believe how loud that thump was. You’re lucky you’re not unconscious.”

  He wasn’t happy with that assessment and asked Gus if he’d seen anyone unusual hanging around. Gus hadn’t seen much of anything since he’d been kissing one of the maids from the castle. We thanked him and went inside to our room.

  Another surprise waited for us there. The room had been completely tossed. Someone had gone through what little personal possessions were there, and had stolen Chase’s laptop. We called castle security—three men who were more like the Stooges than security guards. They took our statements and left with a promise to return in the morning after they had ‘assessed the situation’.

  But in the morning, Bart was at our door instead. He was wearing a black suit with a purple tie. It still didn’t look right.

  “I don’t like murder and mayhem in my Village,” he said. “What are the two of you doing to cause so much trouble?”

  “Looking for the person who killed two people in the Village?” I suggested sarcastically. “Remember when we talked about this yesterday, and you kicked us out of your office?”

  He didn’t wait to be invited into the room. He came in and leaned against the wall. “I heard you were robbed last night.”

  “And assaulted.” Chase gave him a brief rundown of what had happened between the castle and the tavern.

  Bart sighed heavily. “I don’t like to get involved in these situations, but you leave me no choice. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you how much Adventure Land dislikes this kind of thing.”

  “We weren’t crazy about it either,” Chase growled. “What are you going to do to make it different?”

  “I have my own way of dealing with unfortunate situations like this. You two go about your normal business, and I’ll take care of it.”

  I felt like we were talking to an oversized Mafia Don. All he was missing was a cigarette and an Italian meal.

  “My normal business is finding out who killed these people,” I told him. “I’m the Bailiff.”

  Bart nodded his massive head. “I understand. But I’d like you to simply look after the routine Village events. Am I clear?”

  “Sure.”

  “Don’t look at me.” Chase picked up his duffel bag. “I’m headed toward the next joust. Let me know if you need anything.”

  He kissed me and glared at Bart before he left.

  “Obviously a disturbed man.”

  “So what’s your plan fo
r finding the killer?” I asked him.

  He moved away from the wall. “It doesn’t concern you, Bailiff. I’ll keep you advised as events unfold.”

  As he started back out the door, I couldn’t resist one more nudge in the right direction. “Have you talked to Daisy?”

  “That’s another thing that you needn’t worry about. I’m perfectly capable of finding this killer and managing my own life. Good day to you, Lady Bailiff.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  When he was gone I sat on the bed and wished really hard that this was over and I was back home. I heard the buzzing of tiny wings before I opened my eyes and saw Starshine next to me.

  “I’ve already told you that I can’t change the wish you already wished,” she said. “I can grant other wishes if they don’t contradict your original wish. I hope that’s clear.”

  “Two people are dead and someone broke into our room last night. That was after they tried to intimidate me and Chase. How much worse does this have to get? Where is the part where you say it’s over and it all goes away?”

  “I thought I was very specific about what you need to do to go back to your Village.”

  “Yes. Get Chase to love me, and the two of us solve the murder. But like I said, now there are two murders. How many more do we have to solve?”

  “Calm down, Jessie. There is still only one killer. Find him, and you’ll go home before you know it.”

  “You admit there’s only one killer?” That was good news. It meant that Canyon had to be innocent. “If you know there’s only one killer then you must know who it is. Can’t you give me a hint?”

  She kicked her feet. “What fun would that be? And what would you have learned from this experience? You know, a fairy godmother’s wish is more than just a good time.”

  “You can say that again.”

  “I think you know what I mean.”

  I got up and stalked around the room. It wasn’t easy since we were supposed to leave everything a mess until the security people came back. Most of the carpet was full of clutter.

  “What’s to learn? Chase and I wouldn’t be together if he wasn’t the Bailiff. I get that. Wanda, Isabelle, and Ginny would still be alive. Roger and Mary wouldn’t be together. Neither would Bart and Daisy. And Bart would wear those awful suits and people would hate him.”

  “Very good.” She clapped her hands. “And what conclusion does that bring you to?”

  I had to think about it. People were different. My matchmaking skills weren’t useful here, or I hadn’t used them. What did that have to do with the dead fairy?

  “I don’t know. The killer is someone different than he is at home?”

  “That’s true,” she agreed.

  “And he’s looking for a girlfriend? Would I have set him up with someone if Chase had been Bailiff?”

  She frowned. “Cold. You’ve lost the scent.”

  Our conversation was cut short when the castle security men returned to take samples of everything from toothpaste to carpet. I couldn’t figure out what they were doing and was happy when they finally left.

  I waited a few minutes for Starshine to return, but she didn’t show. Maybe she had other people’s lives to mess up. Eventually I had to hit the cobblestones as my radio began squawking out a dozen problems that needed to be corrected.

  This time, I tucked a small dagger into the top of my boot. I didn’t want the killer to take me unaware again and someone to end up looking into my death. A gun would’ve been better, but this was Renaissance Faire Village. It would be entirely out of place.

  After wrapping the heavy leather belt around my hips, I strode out into the crowded Village, keeping in mind what Chase had said about earning respect. I attacked each situation with renewed vigor and strength. From someone running by and taking King Arthur’s sword after he’d pried it from the stone to helping catch Mother Goose’s goose, I kept my head high and my confidence higher.

  I wasn’t sure if the residents of the Village respected me any more by early afternoon, but I was exhausted.

  Chase sent a messenger to Fabulous Funnels where I was breaking up a fight between two mommies with babies in strollers. They were all dressed as fairies. He had free lunch tickets at the Pleasant Pheasant, a restaurant and pub that we liked. I was glad to meet him there.

  “Harder than you thought, huh?” he asked as we waited for our late lunch of fish and chips.

  I didn’t bother lifting my head from the table. “It was much easier when you did it.”

  “I’ve never done it.”

  “Of course you haven’t.” I rapidly picked my head up and smiled. “I meant it would be easier if you were doing it.”

  He leaned toward me. “Jessie, you keep saying this weird stuff like you know things the rest of us don’t. And you knew things about me that I don’t remember ever telling you. What’s going on?”

  “My fairy godmother brought me to an alternate reality because I wished you weren’t the Bailiff anymore so you wouldn’t have to find out who killed Apple Blossom. How crazy is that?”

  “Pretty crazy,” he agreed. “Are you telling me that’s what happened?”

  “Of course not. I’m just tired from the new work. I’ll get used to it.” Or I’ll figure out a way to go home. “Don’t worry about me. How was the joust?”

  “It was good. I was surprised to face off against Sir Reginald again. I don’t know what he’s trying to prove. I don’t think he’s in bad shape, but he’s older. And the Field of Honor is rough even when you’re not fifty.”

  “I agree. I’m sure something will happen to make him give it up.” Yeah. Like a heart attack.

  “In the meantime, I can’t do my best. I’m afraid of hurting him.”

  “He’s probably going through a midlife thing. Just joust with him like you would anyone else.”

  Our food arrived, and Chase told me he was going to have to look for yet another squire. The one he’d grabbed when I became Bailiff wasn’t working out.

  “They have plenty of them at the castle. I’m sure they wouldn’t miss one.” I told him about the visit from castle security. “They took samples of everything except the leftovers in the fridge.”

  “There really needs to be a unified security force for the Village and the castle. Probably under the direction of the Bailiff.” He smiled at me. “Are you ready for something like that?”

  “No. I don’t think so. Maybe when Canyon takes the job back again.”

  “You’re giving it up when he gets back?”

  Before I could answer, Detective Almond was at our table with Pirate Grigg following him. They both scooted in beside us and ordered lemonade.

  “Are you two working the Bailiff job together?” Detective Almond asked. “I hear you got rousted last night and your room was trashed. Anything stolen?”

  “Didn’t your source tell you that?” I stared at Grigg.

  “No. He was out on the lake with the pirates when it happened.” Detective Almond frowned. “This wasn’t what I had in mind when I said ‘undercover’. I was thinking a juggler or a sword swallower.”

  “All admirable professions,” I agreed. “But the pirates get around the Village more than other characters. I was doing my best for him.”

  “Thank ye.”

  I almost spewed sweet tea through my nose when I heard the accent Grigg had taken. It seemed some things absolutely remained the same here.

  Detective Almond stared at him until Grigg looked away. He was playing with an earring in his newly pierced right ear.

  “As I was saying,” Detective Almond continued. “You two are highly visible here. The killer seems to know that you’re looking for him. It’s a good shot that he’ll take advantage of it. Fine work.”

  Chase and I exchanged glances.

  “It wasn’t what I had in mind,” I told him. “I don’t think my life is supposed to be threatened as Bailiff.”

  “It is what it is.” Detective Almond shrugged. “What have you
got on the squire?”

  “Nothing,” Chase said. “There are too many of them to figure out what’s going on. No one knows who Jordan was working for when he threw away the armor.”

  “I’m glad you brought that up.” Detective Almond took out his notes and perched a pair of reading glasses on the edge of his nose. “The armor Mr. Britt was wearing during your sword fight matches what we’re looking for. No blood or semen, but the scratches and kicks from the fairy tell us she fought the man wearing that armor.”

  “But it wasn’t Canyon,” I argued. “Surely the dead squire tells us that.”

  “I tend to agree with you,” he said. “The ME says the handprint on the squire’s neck was the same size as the one on the fairy’s neck. He’s hoping to get some fingerprints from their skin, but no luck on that so far.”

  “So you’ll release Canyon?” I asked.

  “I think we’ll let him go.” He put away his notebook. “See what stirs up when he gets back. Maybe nothing, but the killer might want to get rid of him too. If nothing else, he could take his job back as Bailiff again.”

  I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. It was a hard job, but I had the radio. I could spend more time with Chase, but he probably wouldn’t feel pushed to become the Bailiff with Canyon in that position.

  “We’ll see. Thanks for the update,” I said. “Has Grigg heard anything about what’s going on?”

  Grigg heard his name mentioned and suddenly paid attention. “I haven’t heard anything, but the pirates are busy right now trying to get the cannon up and running again. It’s not as easy as it looks.”

  He was already going native!

  Detective Almond didn’t look happy about Grigg’s report. “We need to have a talk when we’re done here.”

  “Yes, sir.” Grigg’s tone lacked its usual snappiness. Instead he sounded more like a whiny teenager.

  A call came through on the radio. A woman was riding an elephant and refused to get down. They were calling my name. “I have to go. See you later, Detective.”