Angel 2 - Burn

by L. A. Weatherly

  He smiled at my expression. “It reminded me of you,” he said. “Of your angel’s wings.”

  My heart seemed to stop. We hardly mentioned my angel; I didn’t like thinking about it. Up here, away from everything but the wind and the trees, I could almost forget that I wasn’t wholly human.

  “My angel’s wings?” I repeated.

  Alex nodded. “The way they shone in the sun.”

  “But . . . ” I stared back at the pendant, my thoughts spinning. “But you must have bought this before we even got together.”

  “Yeah, when I was buying your clothes.” He ducked his head to peer into my face. “Hey. What is it?”

  I could hardly put it into words. The pendant with the light hitting it was so clear, so shining. “You don’t just not mind, do you?” I said slowly. “About me being a half angel. You really . . . accept it.”

  Alex gave a gentle laugh and tapped my forehead with his fist. “Hello. Have you just figured that out?”

  I didn’t know what to say.

  There was a long pause. Alex cleared his throat. “You know . . . back in the motel room in Tennessee, I woke up from a nightmare once. A really bad one that I used to have a lot. And I looked at your angel.” He scanned my face. “She’s beautiful, Willow — she looks just like you, only more radiant. And just seeing your face, I was able to go to sleep again.”

  My throat went tight. All the way back in Tennessee, he’d felt that way? “But all angels are beautiful,” I said finally. “And they’re still deadly.”

  “You’re really not getting this,” said Alex. He touched my face. “Yes, all angels are beautiful, but that’s just how they look. Your angel is you; she’s a part of you. And that means she’s . . . everything I love.”

  I stared down at the necklace again, almost too moved to speak. “Thank you,” I whispered. I stroked my hand under the pendant, watching it catch the light. Carefully, I undid the clasp and put it on; I could hardly even feel the chain around my neck. Looking down, I saw the pendant sparkling against my skin as if it belonged there.

  I felt almost shy as I looked at him. I cleared my throat. “So . . . when’s your birthday?”

  He grinned suddenly. “Yesterday.”

  I stared at him. “What — seriously?”

  “Yeah, October twenty-third. I turned eighteen.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “What for? I already have everything I want.” He reached across and fingered the pendant; I felt it move against my skin. “Willow, look,” he said. “We haven’t talked much about what might happen, but . . . you know that I always want to be with you, right? I mean — no matter what.”

  And I had known it; I felt it every time he held me — but even so, actually hearing the words made my heart catch. “I want that, too,” I said. “Always, Alex.”

  Alex put his hand on the side of my face; I nestled my cheek into it. “OK, then,” he said softly, rubbing the corner of my mouth with his thumb.

  “OK,” I echoed.

  We just sat there for a moment, smiling at each other. Then Alex picked up my hairbrush. “Here, let me finish this for you.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah, turn around.”

  I turned my back to him and felt him gently combing through my damp hair, working through the tangles. The sleeping bags whispered with the brush’s motion; I could hear the occasional drop of water patting onto them. Outside, I could hear the rustle of the wind through the pine trees. As Alex worked, I reached up and touched the pendant again, stroking its smooth facets as it glinted in the light.

  I knew I’d never take it off.

  That night I lay awake for a long time, curled up on Alex’s chest as he slept, his arms wrapped loosely around me. The cabin was dark and still around us, with only a faint rectangle of moonlight shining in through the outline of the doorway.

  I touched my pendant, thinking for the first time about my angel — I mean, really thinking about her, instead of just slamming a door on the idea the second it came to mind. I remembered the feeling of flying, of seeing the desert turn and dip around me as I swooped through the air. Alex had told me that full-blooded angels couldn’t take on both a human and angel form at the same time, but it seemed like I could. My human form had remained while my angel one flew above, taking my consciousness with it. So far, she had emerged while I slept and while other angels were around, if I needed her.

  Apart from that, where was she? Somewhere inside me?

  I felt a stirring of curiosity. Alex had once suggested that I try to contact her. Could I? Did I even want to?

  Maybe, I thought tentatively.

  The cabin was very still around me. Alex’s breathing was slow, steady, his chest warm under the circle of my arm. I closed my eyes. Hardly knowing where to begin, I took a breath to relax myself and then started drifting, searching.

  Hello? I thought. Are you there?

  Faintly, I became aware of a flicker of energy deep within: a small, crystalline fire that pulsed with a heartbeat of its own. In my mind, I drew forward. The light sparked like a diamond on black velvet. I felt a swirl of energy, one that explored me even as I explored it.

  A jolt of recognition; I smiled in wonder. The energy was so like my own, but different, more charged: a shining rush of power that knew and welcomed me. Suddenly all I wanted was to be in the light. I moved forward, and it grew stronger; it dazzled my eyes but didn’t hurt them. I let it envelop me, and there was an explosion of brightness, like sunshine in a crystal cave. Its energy swept through me, almost making me laugh with joy. I felt its pulse become my own.

  And then I saw her, so clearly in my mind’s eye: the angel with my face.

  She stood gazing at me, her shining robes falling from her shoulders, and I thought dazedly, Alex is right. I am beautiful — because this serene face held such a pure, deep beauty that I felt my throat catch. She had no halo, and her bright wings were spread out behind her, moving gently, flashing like sunshine on water. Her long hair fell loosely past her shoulders, like mine often did. Her eyes shone; I could feel her love cradling me as we regarded each other.

  I never knew. All my life, there had been this whole other part of who I was, and I had never even realized it was there. Suddenly I knew that I could simply shift my consciousness into hers if I wanted to. I would still be me, but I would be her as well. We were two; we were one. She was the twin I had never known, there for me whenever I might need her. The knowledge glowed like a small ember inside of me.

  But not yet. For now, this felt like enough — just to know that she was there and that she wasn’t something to be afraid of. Gently, I withdrew. My angel smiled after me, understanding. As I moved away, she faded and there was only the small, bright light — and then that, too, vanished as I brought my consciousness back to the cabin.

  I opened my eyes.

  The darkness of the small room, with its faint tinge of moonlight. I was still lying in the sleeping bag in Alex’s arms, with my head nestled between his shoulder and chest. He felt so familiar, so safe. I softly kissed his chest, hugging his waist with my arm. He had known. Somehow Alex had known long before I had — the angel side of me wasn’t anything like the angel who had hurt my mother or the ones who had hurt his family. She was a part of me; I could trust her just as much as I trusted myself.

  For the first time since I found out what I really was, I felt the hard knot inside of me ease. It was such a relief, like sinking into a warm bath on a chilly day. I didn’t have to hate myself anymore. I could just . . . be me again, even though “me” was so much more than what I’d once thought.

  Alex stirred, his embrace tightening around me. We lay in each others’ arms, our breathing rising and falling at almost the same time. Around us, the night was so still, so utterly peaceful.

  I was a half angel — and for the first time, that seemed like something that might, just possibly, be OK.

  “We’re expecting at least sixty thou
sand people on the day,” said Jonah. “I’ve arranged for security to help with crowd control, and we have permission to use the fields to the south of the cathedral for extra parking. I’ve gotten a team of devotees to help guide people in.” He put a plan for the extended parking areas onto Raziel’s desk, pointing out the location. “All the other details are coming together, too. We’re having a full dress rehearsal on Friday night, and then the flowers are being delivered early Saturday morning, and —”

  Raziel sat listening with his head propped onto his hand. He was wearing dark pants and a crisp blue shirt open at the neck. Idly, he picked up the plans and glanced at them, then tossed them back onto his desk. “Fine, it all sounds like it’s in hand,” he said. “And what about the half angel? Is there any news?”

  Jonah had been dreading this question. “She . . . hasn’t been found yet.”

  Irritation flickered across the angel’s face. He tapped his silver letter opener against his desk. “Yes, thank you, I’m aware of that. Almost a month now with nothing at all. Are you saying you have no updates?”

  Stalling, Jonah drew the parking plans back across the desk and put them with his other papers. For a panicked moment, he wasn’t sure what to do — and then, his heart thudding, he told the truth. “No, there was something this morning. One of the remote viewers thinks he’s close to finding them; he’s picked up the half angel’s energy in the Sierra Nevada. He just needs to pinpoint the exact location. A day or two at the most.”

  Raziel stared at him. As always, Jonah felt slightly dizzy looking into the angel’s eyes, though it had never really bothered him before. Now his muscles tightened, and he glanced away.

  “We finally have news, and you sat there prattling on about parking plans?” demanded Raziel scathingly.

  “I . . . ” Jonah stopped, his cheeks hot.

  “A day or two,” muttered the angel, running a finger along the letter opener’s blade. “Finally, we’re getting somewhere. All right, the instant their location is found, get someone out there to dispose of them, do you understand? The Second Wave will be here soon, and I want them both destroyed by then. Is that clear?”

  Jonah nodded, his fingers icy. “Yes, sir. I’ll make it happen.”

  Raziel dismissed him, and Jonah went back to his own office, shutting the paneled wooden door behind him. He sank down into his chair and buried his head in his hands. It was true; the half angel was close to being found. And when she was . . . Jonah felt his stomach swing with dread.

  He still didn’t know whether he had made the right decision.

  “HOW ABOUT THAT ONE? Is that a constellation?” I asked, pointing upward. We were down in the small valley where the truck was parked. Alex sat leaning against a rock; I was between his legs with my back against his chest, his arms around me as we stared up at the stars.

  “Yeah, that’s the Seven Sisters, the Pleiades.” He bent his head, and I caught my breath as his warm mouth nuzzled at my neck. I hadn’t gotten even remotely used yet to how good it felt to be kissed by Alex.

  “It’s so sexy how you know all of this,” I said when I could speak again.

  “Yeah?” I heard the grin in his voice. “I know the summer constellations, too. Will that get me bonus kisses?”

  “I think it might, actually.” A cool wind swept us, and I shivered. Alex arranged his leather jacket snugly around me and folded his forearms over my stomach, holding me close. Above, the night sky soared — a glittering sea of light.

  “So . . . I did what you suggested that time,” I told him after a pause. “I contacted my angel.”

  Alex leaned sideways, looking down at me. An amazed smile lit his face. “Really?”

  “Yeah, the night of my birthday.” I felt a small glow of pleasure inside, remembering. “I just sort of wanted to keep it private for a while.”

  He nodded. “Do you want to tell me about it now? Or not?”

  “No, I really do.” I swiveled to face him, sitting cross-legged on the ground as I described everything that had happened — finding my angel within me, feeling her warmth. “I knew that I don’t have to be afraid of her anymore,” I finished finally, “that I don’t have to hate myself for having something like that inside of me.”

  Taking my face in his hands, Alex kissed me softly. “Are you going to contact her again?”

  “Yeah, I will. I — well, I sort of want to try flying again.” My cheeks heated.

  He shook his head in wonder. “I would, too, if I were you.” He hesitated, and then said, “Why don’t you try it now?”

  “Now?”

  “Yeah, why not? I’d really like to see. I mean, unless you’d rather be on your own.”

  The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea. Excitement tickled through me. “OK, I will,” I said. Holding his hands, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I could feel Alex centering himself as well, preparing to rise up through the chakra points. Relaxing, I went deep inside myself, searching for the light that I now knew was there.

  I found it at once — sped toward it this time. A burst of light enveloped me. There was my angel, smiling, her face just as lovely and serene as before. I drank her in — a radiant, shining white, like sun-touched snow. And then, with a slight mental flick, I moved my consciousness to hers.

  I was lifting, growing taller, leaving my human body behind. But at the same time, I was still seated on the ground, with Alex’s hands holding mine. I opened my eyes and saw my angel hovering just above us, her wings moving against the stars.

  “Alex, I can see her,” I whispered from beside him. “I mean — I am her, but I’m here, too.”

  He glanced at me, startled, and then back at the angel. “But how —?”

  “I don’t know,” I said, not taking my eyes off her. “I think she only came out before because I was in danger and she could help. But now I’ve bonded with her, so it’s different this time somehow.” Closing my eyes, I became my angel as she turned and took flight over the valley.

  The stars shifted, came to meet me as I flew up and up. I felt the wind stroking my wings, stirring my hair, and far below, I saw the energy forces of every living thing in the valley. The plants were all turned into something magical, with gleaming white outlines that moved with the wind. Creatures that I hadn’t even known were there suddenly appeared: a mouse crouching in the grass, a pair of deer moving through the pine trees. I saw Alex’s life force down there — a rich, vibrant blue with flashes of gold. And I saw my own beside it: bright angelic silver with lavender lights. The two energies were so close that they mingled like smoke, completely right together.

  On the ground, I opened my eyes again, staring upward as my angel flew. “This is just incredible,” I murmured. “I can feel everything she’s feeling.”

  Alex put his arms around me, and I leaned against him, still watching my angel as she wheeled through the night sky, her snowy wings outspread. “I’m glad you can see her like I do,” he said against my hair. “She’s so beautiful, Willow.”

  The moonlight lit his face as he gazed up at her, and my heart turned over at the expression in his eyes. “So are you,” I said, touching his cheekbone.

  And then, in the air, my angel self stiffened.

  It felt as if icy water had been flung over me as I flew. Something was out there. What was it? Gliding for a moment, I strained desperately, listening for knowledge I couldn’t quite catch — a probing, a thinking. Fear slammed through me, cold and ominous; the foreboding that I’d felt before was only a shadow compared to this.

  Something was coming.

  Turning on my wing, I dove back through the stars toward my human body, merging with a flurry of wings. At the same time, on the ground, my words tumbled out in a panic. “Alex, I felt something!”

  His hands tightened in mine; his voice sharpened. “What?”

  “I don’t know, but something’s on its way. Something dangerous.”

  “A person?”

  I shook my head; I
felt almost tearful with panic. “I don’t know — a person or a situation — I don’t know! But it’s coming here, and soon.”

  Alex’s face was tense, his jaw tight. “When’s ‘soon’? Can you tell?”

  “I . . . ” I tried to stop shaking. “I don’t know. I don’t think it’s instantly — I mean, not right this second. But soon.”

  “We’ve got to get out of here,” muttered Alex, dropping one of my hands and scraping his hair back. “Damn it — it won’t be light for hours; we’d break an axle trying to get down that mountain in the dark.” He blew out a breath; I could practically hear his mind working. “OK — we’ll get the truck loaded up tonight and leave as soon as we can, the minute it’s dawn.”

  Nervously, I rubbed my fists on my jeans. “And go where?”

  “I’ve been thinking about that,” he admitted. “How would you feel about Mexico?”

  “Mexico?”

  His dark eyebrows drew together in a troubled frown. “Yeah. From what Cully said, I might be the only Angel Killer left. I’ve got to find some new AKs and train them, or else humanity won’t even stand a chance. We could find someplace down there where you’ll be safe and hole up while I put some feelers out. There were some good AKs from Mexico — I think with luck, I could get something going there, start up operations again. What do you think?”

  I felt slightly stunned; I hadn’t picked up on any of this from him. Slowly, I said, “It sounds good, except . . . it’s all going to take time, isn’t it? I mean, starting things up again and training people.”

  “Yeah, but what choice do we have?”

  I didn’t want to speak the words, but I had to. “Alex, you told me once that the AKs were losing the war. That you needed something big to stop the angels.”

  He didn’t say anything.

  The night air felt cold and still around us. I took a deep breath. “I’m the something big, aren’t I? I can’t just hide away forever, keeping safe. I’m supposed to be the one who can defeat them.”