Good Muslim Boy
Page 26
The Saudi man is still in his seat, waiting for everyone to go.
As I’m fetching my small carry-on, I feel him tap my shoulder.
I turn around, thinking he wants to return my father’s cane.
But his fists just fly towards me. He cups my face in both palms, pulling me towards him, and kissing me on the brow.
‘You are like a son to me, and I’m sorry I lost it.’
‘I’m the one who should be sorry. I should’ve been more diplomatic.’
He shrugs. ‘I guess we were both on our last nerves. Never marry more than one wife, son. It’s not as glamorous as it looks.’
I thank him for the sage advice and leave the cane with him.
Acknowledgements
This book is the culmination of the energy and love I have been surrounded by, without which I couldn’t have even typed the first letter of my own name.
First and foremost, I must thank Hardie Grant for giving me the opportunity to tell my story and then for their patience, which at times was on par with Prophet Job’s. Fran, my publisher, who was my first champion, and then Meelee, my editor, for humouring me even when the writing wasn’t so humorous, and Ronnie and Nikki for all the hard work as we sprinted to the finish line.
I need to thank my close friends who have been extremely supportive throughout this process and have also, like my editor, laughed at my jokes even when they were flatter than a flat white.
Thank you also Salme, Kim and Asal—three young ladies who listened to my story from start to finish when I returned from Iran. Rain, thank you for your support and enthusiasm for life. Reza, the not-so-young man, thank you also.
Nicole, your love over the past decade has been honey in a hurricane. Thank you.
Shahin—you are a true mate. Your values and hope in humanity have helped me become a better man.
I thank my cousins and extended family, who live on different continents due to circumstance, for their encouragement, love and support.
I thank all my teachers, past and present, for they are the bedrock of my being.
Abbas Arezumand, the first man who introduced me to storytelling.
Michael Rowland, for opening an early door for me and remaining a friend, despite the fact that I opted out of vegetarianism.
And Tony Ayres—for all his love and incredible, delicate support. Meeting and working with Tony eventually paved the path to write this memoir and I am eternally grateful.
Andrew Knight. ‘The’ Andrew Knight. Thank you so much for teaching me so much. And for the heated, cool discussions on the plight of the Essendon Bombers FC.
I give thanks, a special thanks, to John Orscik for being my mentor and friend since the day I decided to dive into the creative life. Since day one. Walking into TAFTA changed my life and I will always be indebted to you.
John and Wendy, thank you for all your support throughout the years and being more than agents—friends, which are rare as yourselves.
I thank Soukena, who is not only the mother of my children but stood by me when buildings were collapsing and even went as far as shielding me from debris. The sacrifices you made will never be forgotten.
My family: you are all flowers in my heart garden. I love you all. From Mum who always found ways to fund creative classes in a war-torn country, to Moe Greene for his enormously generous heart, to Ali my true brother, to Mona and Roah my sisters, to Hassan and Hussain my little bros.
Of little ones, Sama, my young daughter—thank you for keeping me accountable and teaching me care and love. And Sara, who makes me feel alive.
And Dad. He was my confidant, friend and absolute hero.
Osamah Sami is a failed cricketer and a struggling Muslim. His choice to forge a career as an artist (actor/writer/comedian) has caused his loved ones terrible anxiety. His mother would love nothing more than for him to get real employment—at the local IGA. (If it was good enough for Anh Do, it’s good enough for her son.)
He was born in war-torn Iran to Iraqi parents, and escaped to Australia with his family when he was a teen. Those experiences moulded him into a confused soul; it is a miracle he is still entrusted to write and perform.
As a writer, he has completed two feature films: Ali’s Wedding*, a Muslim romantic comedy based on the events in this book, and Be Less Beautiful, filming in 2016. He has also written a vague number of plays, co-created and developed the eight-episode sitcom Baghdad to the Burbs, and co-created the web series 2 Refugees and a Blonde.
On stage he has performed for Belvoir St Theatre Company, Big West, La Mamma, Melbourne Theatre Company, Theatre@Risk, and in over two dozen other independent shows. Osamah also played the title role in Saddam the Musical, which got him deported from the U.S., having been mistaken for a terrorist. In fairness, he does barrack for AFL team the Bombers.
He played the lead role in the film Saved (directed by Tony Ayres), opposite Claudia Karvan, and in Dee McLachlan’s award-winning 10 Terrorists! On television, he has appeared in the shows Kick, City Homicide, East West 101, Sea Patrol and Rush. Contrary to popular belief, he has played a terrorist only twice.
Osamah is listed as a ‘notable Australian Muslim’ by the Commonwealth of Australia. He is currently investigating how this could have occurred, with one of the country’s top non-Muslim private detectives emptying his bank account. He is also working on being a better father to his two beautiful daughters.
* Matchbox Pictures will release the feature film Ali’s Wedding, starring Osamah, in 2016.
Published in 2015 by Hardie Grant Books
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All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted in any form by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publishers and copyright holders.
The moral rights of the author have been asserted.
Copyright text © Osamah Sami, 2015
A Cataloguing-in-Publication entry is available from the catalogue of the National Library of Australia at www.nla.gov.au
Good Muslim Boy
eISBN 978 1 74358 321 0
Cover design by Mark Campbell
Weaving by Cathy Tipping
Text design by Patrick Cannon