Summer's Song

by Lindi Peterson

  “I needed the money. And you know it. You’re the one who cut me off. What was I supposed to do?”

  “Get a job? Ever thought of that?”

  She raises her arms in the air. “Like I didn’t try? You know how long I tried to get a job? Nothing worked out.”

  “And because nothing was working you convinced me to buy you those breasts. They were supposed to fix all your troubles.” I can’t resist bringing up something I’d done for her. I wonder if that information is in the book.

  “They helped to some degree. But it wasn’t enough.”

  My fists are clenched. I feel my face flush. “I dropped thousands of dollars in a bank account for you every month. You continually drained it. I asked you to find a job and learn how to manage money.”

  She hooks her thumbs in her skirt. I hope it doesn’t fall off. “Ha. You’re a fine one to talk. You get on a stage, sing, shake your booty and rake in millions. You have no idea how to manage money. You have people to do that for you.”

  “At least somebody’s doing it. And I have managed my money out here for a year now. I’m learning things.”

  “Well, whoop-dee-do. I’m thrilled for you. Just one more thing Summer is good at.”

  I stand. “Little sister, you are not, do you hear me, you are not going to turn this on me. Tell me what’s in this book and how much money you’re making.”

  “The money part isn’t any of your business. Let’s just say I won’t be asking you for any more cash.”

  “Unbelievable.”

  “Are you jealous because I’m good at something?”

  Is she serious? I look at her. Really look at her. Her eyes make me sad because they look dead. Like there’s no life behind them. Like she’s some sort of robot.

  Like mine used to look.

  Now it’s my turn to take a deep breath. I’ve got to figure this out. “When is this book coming out?”

  In my red haze of anger I didn’t read the release date in the magazine.

  “In a couple of weeks.”

  “Before or after my court date.”

  Her heavily lashed eyes close then open slowly. “Before.”

  Great. I’m sure it’s all been planned out for months. Obviously Todd knew about this. “Does Mother know?”

  Valentine’s gaze immediately shifts, and I know the answer.

  “So, tell me, Valentine. How bad is this for me?”

  Did I really create these monsters in my life?

  I sit on the front porch step. The full moon goes hand in hand with my sister’s, no my family’s, betrayal.

  Crazy.

  I know on some sort of subconscious level I’m sitting here hoping Levi will walk up. Yes, I can admit my weaknesses. I texted him a message earlier telling him I wouldn’t be over, but I never heard back from him. I’m hoping his curiosity will get the best of him, and he’ll walk the path through the woods or even drive up the drive. I’m good with either one.

  Valentine and I wasted the afternoon away arguing. She kept trying to blame me for her actions. As afternoon turned to evening I found myself flinging everything out of her suitcase until I found a copy of the book.

  Then I read it.

  The title of the book is a bit deceiving. The contents of the book are more of what was in the headlines. I guess that’s the good news. The bad news?

  My irresponsibilities, failures and run-ins with the law are going to be brought to the public eye the week before I’m due in court to be judged as someone fit to take care of her child.

  It’s all in the timing.

  And in the betrayal.

  I knew my sister resented me. I just didn’t know how much. At least to my mother’s credit the worst thing she’s done in this is hide it from me after the fact. She didn’t know anything about it until Valentine told her a few weeks ago when the project was finished. Valentine said Mother was pleased she’d get back some of the money Valentine had borrowed.

  The same with Todd. He didn’t know until the deed was done and will be repaid the money he lent Valentine.

  Me? Afraid not.

  You see, I never loaned her money. I gave it to her.

  Out of the goodness of my heart? No. I’ll also admit that. I gave it to her because of guilt. Because I had more talent. Because I’m prettier. Because I had a great career, and she seemed to have nothing.

  If only I’d known too, I really had nothing.

  But I can’t process this. How I’m supposed to keep on loving her? Start loving her is more like it. She can’t stand me and wants to see me fail at every turn.

  I glance at my watch. Ten.

  Going into the house, I grab my purse. Valentine is nowhere to be seen. She’s probably upstairs in her room texting George. She’ll only be here until Tuesday morning. Apparently she has an interview in Atlanta with one of the cable stations to promote the book.

  Hoo-ray!

  I just know asking me to go with her wasn’t on her agenda. A small part of me thinks she might have thought I would not be mad about this. That I would be glad she accomplished something.

  But she accomplished it at my expense. When I mentioned this aspect to her, she once again accused me of being self-centered.

  My shoes crunch over the gravel as I walk to my car. It’s almost like I’m on automatic pilot. I’ve only heard one word since the news of this betrayal.

  Levi.

  Somehow I’m thinking he will make it better. Maybe he can help me reason my way through this. Maybe he can make me see it’s not as bad as I’m thinking it is.

  Maybe he can show me how not to hate my sister.

  It only takes minutes to drive to Skeet’s house. And he had told Levi to take care of me.

  Levi, I need taken care of right about now.

  I stand at Skeet’s front door for what seems like forever before Levi opens it. His expression is non-existent, his stance is relaxed, and he keeps his hand on the door like he might be closing it at any moment.

  “That must be some extensive wardrobe you have,” he says.

  “What?” I glance down at my outfit. Why is he bringing up my wardrobe?

  He looks at his watch then back at me. “Considering I dropped you off about eight hours ago so you could change clothes, I’m just thinking you have a whole lot of clothes to choose from.”

  “You didn’t text me back.”

  “I know. I thought maybe you needed time with your sister.”

  I smile, sure his comment wasn’t meant to elicit one. “Trust me. I’ve had way too much time with my sister.”

  “Come on in.” He closes the door, but thankfully I’m on the same side he is when he does it.

  I sniff the air, poignant with a great smell. “Cooking something?”

  “I am. Frozen pizza. Would you like some?” Levi asks as he walks into the kitchen. He leans against counter. Everything about him is calm, cool. Like he doesn’t have a care in the world. But his eyes betray him. Every now and then, like now, they hint at something dark. Something has settled in his heart that causes him sadness.

  Skeet, you know what I’ve been through. This is not a good time for something like this.

  I wonder if Levi’s “something like this” is anything like this. My sister’s betrayal.

  “I guess it’s a little late for pizza delivery out here, huh?” I ask.

  “Actually I like frozen. You have eaten frozen pizza, haven’t you?”

  “I think so. A while back, maybe, at a friend’s place.”

  He smiles, although I know he doesn’t want to. I like it when he smiles. Especially when he’s smiling at me.

  “You don’t know what you’re missing,” he says.

  “I’m getting ready to find out, though.”

  He shifts his stance, and I know what’s coming. Questions.

  “What happened? Why didn’t you come over?”

  I open my mouth, but he holds his hand up. “I want an honest answer. If you don’t want to work with me, just
say it. Just say the words.”

  My heart hurts at the tone of his words. At the expectation he has of me. But can I blame him? I have changed my mind a couple of times so far, tried to use him once, and stood him up. All in less than forty-eight hours. “Those are not the words I’m going to say.”

  “Okay. Then say what you need to say.”

  Oh, he doesn’t want to hear what I need to say. Because I need to say that standing him up hurt my heart. That running to him was the first thing I wanted to do as my sister flung her accusations at me. I need to say the only safe refuge I even thought about centered around being with him. Those are the words I need to say.

  “My sister dropped a bombshell on me.”

  His expression turns quizzical. “How much money does she need?”

  I cross my arms, knowing it’s a self-defense mechanism. Maybe the words I utter regarding my sister will hang in the air and not penetrate my heart. “I wish money was the reason Valentine is here.”

  “Valentine. Such an interesting name. Like Summer.”

  “Yes. Mother isn’t very creative. I was born on June twenty-first, the first day of—”

  “Summer,” Levi says. “And let me guess. Your sister was born on—”

  “February fourteenth,” I finish. “Valentine’s day.”

  This light banter seems to relax us both a little. I even jump as the buzzer goes off, indicating the pizza is done.

  “Grab a couple of plates out of that cupboard, please.” Levi nods his head toward my left.

  I turn and get two plates. Levi uses the pizza cutter with extreme finesse, and in moments we are sitting at the bar in the kitchen with slices of pizza on our plates and cold sodas in front of us.

  “Silverware with pizza?” I ask picking up the fork he’s placed next to my plate.

  “Wasn’t sure.”

  “First time for everything.”

  This is a huge day for firsts, I think after Levi says a blessing before we eat. I’ve never blessed pizza, never used a fork with pizza, and I’ve never been to church until today. But I guess the biggest first is my sister informing me she’s written a book about me for cold hard cash.

  I bite into my pizza. “Ouch.” My tongue and the roof of my mouth sting with the heat.

  “Watch out, it’s hot.”

  “But good.” I didn’t realize how hungry I was.

  “Good. Glad you like it. So if your sister didn’t come for money, what did she come for?”

  His attention is now focused on me while his brown eyes and steady expression apparently wait for my answer.

  As I think about the reality of the book, I push my plate away. What I have eaten feels like lead in my stomach when I think about the implications of what Valentine has done.

  “Is there something wrong with your sister? You could have brought her along.”

  I laugh at his words. Valentine and Levi? That’s an even worse combination than me and Levi. “Oh, Levi. You don’t want me bringing her anywhere.”

  “Why not?”

  He too seems to have abandoned our dinner.

  “She’s written a tell-all book about me. It will be hitting the stands two days before my court date.”

  Levi’s eyebrows rise slightly. “Really? A tell-all book? That’s cold.”

  A crazy fear snakes its way through me. My sister’s tell-all book will be a very concise way Levi can read about everything bad thing I’ve done. This I hadn’t considered.

  This isn’t good.

  This is scary.

  A shame I haven’t felt in a long time engulfs me. I stand and head for the front door. I don’t want Levi reading about me the way I used to be.

  “Summer, wait.”

  My hand closes around the door knob, but before I can turn it he places his over mine. He’s standing behind me. So close. His cologne or aftershave or whatever is the cause of his good scent surrounds me. His mere presence relaxes yet excites me at the same time. I’m facing the door, afraid to look at him. Afraid of what he’ll see in my eyes.

  His hand removes mine from the door. He wraps one arm around me while the fingers of his other hand push my hair behind my ear before resting on my shoulder.

  “You can get through this,” he whispers.

  I close my eyes at the thought. I can’t seem to get through anything. I lean back even further into the folds of his body, a literal showing of my inner need to have a safe place to nestle into.

  I’ve never experienced such a place.

  His arms feel strong, like they could protect me from anything. Light from the porch slants across the entry way through the side panel window. The room is still. Quiet.

  Ours.

  We are totally alone. He’s hot, I’m available, and we’re not ripping each other’s clothes off. We’re not grabbing at each other with utter abandonment of all of our senses.

  Yet I’ve never felt so naked and vulnerable.

  Chapter Eight

  I am sure Levi can feel the pounding of my heart against his chest. His warmth and strength have placed me in a very uncomfortable position. Yet it’s a position I don’t want to end. For the first time all day I finally feel like I can exhale.

  And when I do, tears of betrayal fall from the corners of my eyes. Levi’s thumb stops the river on the right side of my face.

  “Go ahead, cry. Get it out.”

  His voice is incredibly soft. Caressing.

  “Sit down.” He then helps me to the floor. I sit with my back against the front door.

  “I’ll be right back. Don’t go anywhere.”

  He returns so quickly I didn’t even have time to think about where he had gone or where I would have gone had I decided to leave. He hands me a couple of tissues before sitting down next to me. His shoulder touches mine.

  After wiping my eyes and blowing my nose in the most lady-like manner I can, I lean my head against the door. “I’m sorry.”

  “For what?”

  “For turning into a blubbering female. Like you need to be dealing with this.”

  “You’ve had a bad day.”

  I laugh. One of the reasons I like Levi is his ability to make me laugh. And smile. And do heart cart-wheels. But before I can continue on my happy trail scenario, the betrayal of my sister is once again all I can think about.

  Scooting a little sideways, I look at Levi. He gives me one of his awesome smiles then takes my hand in his. Somehow this removes thought of my sister’s betrayal. Levi’s touches seem to make my mind mush.

  He sure is a physical kind of guy for not being interested in getting me into bed. At least I don’t think he’s interested. Maybe subconsciously that’s why I’m interested.

  “A little holding of hands isn’t going to make it all better.” I wonder if he wants to kiss me.

  “Does it help at all?”

  “It does.” He has yet to remotely indicate he would like to kiss me.

  “Good.”

  “You know, even though Valentine and I don’t get along I really thought I could count on my sister to have my back. Not stab me in it.”

  Levi runs his free hand through his hair. His gaze diverts away from mine, and I sense a shift in him. If he would look at me, I bet I would see the darkness that slips into his gaze from time to time.

  “Maybe,” he starts. “She thought she was doing the right thing.”

  Out of all the things I expect him to say that is not one of them. Did he hear me tell him she wrote a book about my exploits? “Are you kidding me?”

  “You know, sometimes people are at a loss as to how to help people.”

  The atmosphere has changed from cozy, warm, and sexy to awkward and cool. And the shift has come from Levi. His gaze no longer lingers with mine in an understanding kind of way. Now his gaze darts everywhere but at me. His hand is no longer intertwined with mine because his arms are crossed in front of him. “You are talking about helping people. What my sister has done is hurtful. They can’t be compared.”
/>   “What if you think you are helping, but it turns out to be hurtful? What then?”

  His pained expression catches me off-guard. Skeet, you know what I’ve been through.

  What has Levi been through? Is it tied into this conversation we are having now? “Levi, is everything okay with you?”

  He smiles for a moment. But only a moment. “Sure. It’s all good.”

  “Not great?”

  “There’s nothing wrong with good.”

  I rub my arms trying to warm the chill in the air. Levi certainly knows a whole lot more about me than I know about him. And I realize I don’t like that. I guess I can start with the basics. “Where do you live?”

  He licks his lips before answering. Like this is an inquisition. “Texas. A little town outside Houston.”

  “Houston. I’ve been there. For concerts. It’s not like I’ve seen the city or anything.”

  “It’s a pretty cool city.”

  Ha. No invitation from Levi to visit his city when he returns. I really don’t know what I’m expecting out of him. “Do you live by yourself?”

  His expression is slightly pensive before he breaks into a smile. Oh, great, he probably thinks I’m asking if he has a relationship of some sort.

  “Why do you want to know?”

  I knew it. “You know a whole lot more about me than I know about you. I’m just trying to catch up.”

  He chuckles. “I own my own house. There. Now you know a little more.”

  His words have a terse countenance to them. I wonder what kind of ground I’m treading on. Obviously some ground that makes Levi uncomfortable. “That’s nice. Is your family close by?”

  Now he visibly stiffens. “There’s no family. It’s just me.”

  My insides kind of whoosh. “Wow. I can’t imagine not having someone to yell at.”

  My comment doesn’t illicit any reaction from him.

  His legs are stretched out. He crosses his ankles and rubs the back of his neck. “It’s kind of late, don’t you think?”

  His complete brush-off of letting me into his life hits me. He doesn’t want me to know anything about him. “It is. Sorry for prying. You can read all about me in a couple of weeks, but there’s no need for you to tell me anything about your life. So, I guess I’ll be going.”