Ghalien

by Jenna Elizabeth Johnson

  She cleared her throat and brushed her hair nervously behind her ears.

  "Yeah, just thinking about those moths again."

  For a few seconds, I tried to discern what had caused this strange episode, and I was pretty sure it had nothing to do with the moths.

  Fergus brushed past me, nearly knocking me off balance. His thoughts, although indecipherable, suggested nothing but mirthfulness.

  Shrugging, I trudged on. Our destination was just beyond this meadow, and I was eager to arrive and rest. We'd traveled a good part of the day and both Meghan and I had woken early.

  Soon, a familiar, grassy meadow guarded by a collection of weathered standing stones greeted us. As Meghan glanced around in interest, I ventured over to an old hollow tree where a cache of camping gear was stored.

  As if on cue, Meghan wondered aloud about sleeping bags.

  I squeezed into the tree hollow and pulled out a large duffle bag for emphasis.

  Once Meghan was assured we had accommodations for the night, I went about setting up our camp. Pots, plates and dried food found their way out into the open and I was careful to set up our makeshift beds on opposite sides of the fire pit. Afterward, we both sat down to rest from the long hike. Feeling there was a need to fill the silence, I explained to Meghan how this site had been one of my favorites since childhood. Luathara came up in the conversation, though I avoided explaining to her that the castle belonged to me. For some reason, now didn't seem like the right time to do so. Besides, I still hadn't gotten around to restoring it yet, and I was hoping to have at least started construction before inviting Meghan for a visit.

  I paused in my speech and looked up at her. The late afternoon sun bathed her in its golden light and I couldn't help but admire the picture she painted. I had decided long ago that Meghan was a striking girl, with the kind of beauty that only became more apparent the longer I studied her. Unfortunately, this created quite a dilemma. Staring at someone for long periods of time often left them feeling uncomfortable, which Meghan was demonstrating at that very moment by casting her eyes anywhere but on me.

  "Do you still visit the castle?"

  Meghan's voice intruded on my personal reverie, so it took me a moment or two to formulate an answer. A picture of Luathara, in all its ruined glory, basking in the sunny valley surrounding it and outlined against the wooded hills filled my mind. As decrepit as the old fortress was, it had been my retreat in the Otherworld for countless years, a place I could go to when I wasn't hunting faelah in the mortal world, staying with my sister in the Weald, or visiting the Dagda in his abode. No, Luathara wasn't a grand palace, but one day it would be a proper castle once again.

  Smiling, I replied, "Sometimes."

  "Can I go with you one day? I mean, if I ever come back to Eile with you."

  Meghan seemed flustered as she asked her question, but a flood of satisfaction spread through me. I looked up at her, catching her eyes with mine. Normally a hazel color, her irises were flashing between green and gold at the moment and I would have given anything to know her thoughts. She wanted to see Luathara. Yes, I had always planned to take her there, but for her to ask of her own accord? That meant she wasn't sick of me yet. I knew it was ridiculous to be so pleased by her question, especially since she had no idea Luathara was mine, but it still sent chills over my skin.

  "Yes," I finally said, my voice revealing a little too much emotion, "you may come with me the next time you visit."

  Meghan nodded and turned her face away from mine. For a few minutes we were silent, but it turned out my companion wasn't finished with her inquiries.

  "So, you mentioned your foster father . . ."

  With Meghan's encouragement, I delved into a very edited version of how I came to live with the Dagda. Not once did I speak of the Morrigan. That was a truth I would keep from Meghan forever if I had the power to do so. Of all my secrets, the fact that I was the son of the goddess of war was the one I wanted to keep hidden most. Well, maybe that one and the one about my riastrad . . . If Meghan ever found out that it was my mother who wanted to kill her and take her glamour, I was certain I would lose whatever connection I'd managed to create with her so far. Unfortunately, too many people in Eile knew of my parentage and it was only a matter of time before Meghan learned the truth.

  So instead, I told Meghan that my mother hadn't wanted me, which was the truth. The moment I was born the Morrigan was ready to be rid of me, she had already admitted as much to me. It wasn't until I was older and my potential started to show that she discovered a use for me. Meghan listened intently to my sugar-coated life history, like a child hearing her very first adventure story. She was especially curious about the Dagda, so I gladly told her everything I could about my foster father.

  Eventually, daylight began to fade and I suggested gathering some firewood before full dark set in. I offered Meghan a hand up and when her bare skin touched mine, my glamour pulsed once, leaping suddenly like an angry dog against its chain. For that split second, I lost control of my actions. Tugging harder than I meant to, I yanked Meghan off her feet and pulled her flush against my chest. I barely had time to recover before I found myself fighting against my own magic again. With Meghan now so close to me, it was hard not to wrap my arms around her and act on the fantasy I'd played out over and over again in my mind. She felt so soft and warm, and my heart kicked up its pace as her scent flooded my senses. I glanced down and found her face well within kissing range, her surprised eyes flashing every shade of hazel imaginable. Slowly, I dropped my head, intent on fulfilling this daydream come to life. Fortunately, for the sake of the fragile friendship we had established, I didn't get that far.

  Fergus, who had been off exploring for the past hour or so, came bursting across the small meadow, barking as Meghan's merlin, Meridian, chased after him. Immediately, the spell broke and I lifted Meghan and moved her out of the way of the two spirit guides.

  To cover up my agitation at the whole situation, I shouted something at Fergus in the language of Eile. That had been close. Too close. I needed to do a better job at keeping my impulsive glamour in check if I wanted to protect Meghan. If the Morrigan decided to take up residence in my head again any time for the next forty eight hours, then I could not let my emotions get the better of me. My mother might not be able to get to Meghan's secrets, but it wouldn't take her long to read my state of mind and realize Meghan was with me. Best to keep my distance, as much as it pained me.

  As I released Meghan, I made some lame apology for the behavior of my spirit guide. She appeared a bit flustered, but soon she was smiling once again. "Firewood?" she prompted.

  I glanced over my shoulder and spotted Fergus considering me with his ears perked forward. Although he didn't send any thoughts my way, I could tell what he was thinking. There was a very good chance Meghan would be leaving the Otherworld with the memory of my lips dancing over hers. Dangerous thoughts, Cade, very dangerous. If you kiss her, the situation could so easily slip from your control. I growled low in my throat and gave Meghan a terse nod. Perhaps some traipsing around in the nearby woods would give me a chance to cool off.

  Our search for firewood commenced and after a brief incident with a giant, Otherworldly invertebrate, we were ready to call it a night. To be honest, I suspected Meghan was still a little shaken up from her encounter with the litterbug and I was quickly growing weary from the internal struggle with my unruly glamour. With the fire crackling and twilight descending upon us, the mood was perfect to continue the conversation we had started earlier, only this time I wanted to hear about Meghan's life. Perhaps I could ask her something about her childhood growing up in the mortal world or what it was like to have brothers. Before I could formulate my first question, my train of thought was violently interrupted. The Morrigan's shil-sciar voice crashed into my mind, searing my thoughts like a blast furnace. It took every bit of self-control I possessed not to cry out from the shock.

  Awww, did I startle my little boy? she taunt
ed.

  What do you want? I demanded as a cold sweat broke out on my skin. I could not let her know I was here in Eile with Meghan.

  I am in need of your unique skills.

  Her tone seemed dry, bored even. Good. Maybe she didn't suspect anything.

  First thing tomorrow morning, I expect you to be on your way to my fortress.

  No, I snapped. I had dragged Meghan here to help her with her glamour and I couldn't cancel on her now. Besides, it was too late to make the trek back to the dolmarehn. My mother wasn't suspicious yet, and if I could just play it cool for a little while longer . . .

  You will have to wait until later in the day. I have a previous engagement.

  No? You dare deny me? What could be more important than attending to your dear mother?

  I took a deep breath and started to climb into my bedroll. I had to shake off the Morrigan and the only way I knew how to do that was to shut down my mind.

  Once I was settled, I shot over my shoulder for Meghan's benefit, "We need to go to sleep soon since early morning is the best time to use glamour."

  It was a flat-out lie and my tone was harsh and cold, but it had to be done. No sentimental feelings were permitted to dance around in my head for the rest of the evening. Wouldn't want my mother to pick up on them and start asking questions. I sighed inwardly as I turned my face toward the cold wilderness beyond the boundary of the stones. So much for that heart to heart I'd been looking forward to.

  Pulling the blanket in close under my chin, I tried to put Meghan out of my mind when I finally answered the Morrigan. You may pull most of the strings in my life, but you do not control everything. I have plans that I cannot change, so you will have to be happy with the time I can offer you.

  The Morrigan's irritation burned across my brain, but I gritted my teeth and bore it. After several minutes of fighting her rage, she relented, promising me a night full of bad dreams. I only hoped that whatever horror I went through tonight wouldn't affect Meghan.

  * * *

  My mood was much improved by the next morning, despite the pounding headache that greeted me when I awoke. The Morrigan had kept true to her word, plaguing my sleep with images of death and suffering, but fortunately, none of these scenes featured a warped and tormented Meghan. And my mother hadn't arrived in the middle of the night to whisk the two of us off to her realm to become her next sacrifice.

  After crawling out of my bedroll, Fergus joined me to search for more firewood and soon after arriving back at the campsite, I had a nice blaze going to take the chill out of the morning air. Meghan stirred just before sunrise and once our stomachs were full, we packed up and headed out. I was eager to get this lesson over with so that I could send her back to the mortal world where the Morrigan would be less inclined to harass her. Despite the oath between us, I wouldn't be surprised if my mother broke it. There was nothing quite as dangerous as waving a piece of steak in the face of a starving, feral lion.

  After a few easy miles, the trees opened up onto a meadow decorated with several standing stones, some broken and toppled from age and the passage of time. I loved this particular spot because it was a sacred place, a place where the Druids once summoned the power of Eile. The stone circle, although damaged and in disrepair, still held some power. I told this much to Meghan, explaining that the stones and their placement helped channel the glamour and concentrate it into this one spot.

  "I'm glad most of the stones aren't standing, actually," I mused. "If this place was in its original shape, then conjuring magic here might prove a bit overwhelming, should Eile respond in full."

  Meghan's eyes grew wide and I couldn't help but smile. The sudden influx of magic was strong enough to knock someone of my size unconscious, especially if they'd never summoned their glamour before. I had a feeling, however, that Meghan's own cautious attitude at the moment would help alleviate that possibility.

  "You're just going to show me the process this first time, right?" Meghan asked.

  Yes, I could show her how to call on her power and channel it to do her bidding and just leave it at that, but the temptation to touch her again was too strong. Those few moments I had held her as Fergus and Meridian tore through the campsite were not nearly long enough, and selfish bastard that I was, I craved more, especially since I had been denied the opportunity to talk with her last night. A shiver of anticipation rippled over my skin followed closely by a spike in my own glamour.

  Oh no, settle down. No need to lose complete control . . .

  The inner warning from the night before prickled on the edge of my mind, but I batted it away like a pesky gnat.

  "No, Meghan," I said once that feral edge had passed, "we came here so that you can experience what it feels like to channel your own glamour."

  She looked uncertain, as if she didn't trust me. Well, I thought, shivering in anticipation at the idea of a challenge, we'll just have to change that.

  "Cade? Are you sure this is safe? I don't know if I even have any power, remember?"

  Oh, if only she could sense what I did, that faint aura of pale blue magic humming just above her skin, almost visible if I didn't look directly at her. The same magic I had followed into the swamp, leading me to her doorstep. My own glamour stood up and arched its back, eager to get started.

  "You do," I croaked. "Trust me."

  I reached out a hand and clasped one of hers, drawing her into the jagged circle of stones and placing her back against my chest. Concentrating on a glamour lesson with Meghan so close to me was difficult, but somehow I managed.

  "And now we ask Eile to recognize your power, and to feed it with her own magic if it is hungry."

  My mouth was only a few inches from Meghan's ear and it took every ounce of willpower I possessed not to press my lips to the soft skin of her neck. What had gotten into me of late, I couldn't say. For so long I had denied myself any of these longings, but for some reason, whenever Meghan Elam was around, the part of my brain that usually kept them in check simply shut down.

  My voice remained low as I continued my lesson. "Your glamour is a living thing, Meghan. And just like you and all that you are, it desires certain things. Your lungs need oxygen, your stomach craves food." I paused for a split second, wondering if I should use the words I planned to speak next. Before I could talk myself out of it, I breathed, "Your heart desires love."

  Meghan shivered and drew in a breath. I probably should have given her some distance but I was far too comfortable where I was.

  "Now, close your eyes and let us both take from Eile what she has to offer."

  "Do we need to say anything special?" Her voice was nothing more than a reverent whisper.

  "Just allow your senses to feel the power of nature around you."

  Meghan must have understood because she relaxed and her breathing became deeper. And while she tried to find the glamour within herself, I basked in the delight of her mere presence. I, too, took deep breaths, not to relax but to soak in her calming scent. Her heartbeat called to my own and the warmth of her skin heated my senses. After several minutes, I reluctantly moved away from her. With our connection broken, Meghan glanced over her shoulder. I couldn't help but notice her slight flush and the new brightness to her eyes. My wild glamour gave a low growl, and for a second I considered what it would be like to give it free rein.

  Nothing good will come of it, my conscience reminded me.

  Despite my glamour's protests, I forced it into submission and shook my head slightly as I faced Meghan. Time to focus on the reason we were here . . .

  "Did you sense anything?"

  "Uh, I think so," Meghan answered. "I noticed the presence of nature, but nothing else."

  I was surprised. With the amount of dormant glamour I could sense in Meghan, I would have expected at least some of it to break free of its shell and reach out toward the natural magic of Eile. Perhaps Meghan's geis was more complicated than I had previously thought. Maybe those who had placed the geis on her to begin wit
h had also established a stronger, deeper spell of protection on her glamour.

  Instead of sharing this information with her, I simply said, "You would have known if you felt it." The last thing I wanted to do was give Meghan something else to fret about. Her glamour would eventually awaken, I was certain of that fact. Best not to force it if it wasn't ready.

  She shifted her weight and met my eyes, her own back to their normal hazel color. "Felt what, exactly?"

  I hesitated, but then opened my mouth to say, "I might as well tell you what to expect, just in case your glamour decides to wake up when I'm not around."

  My reasons for extending the lesson weren't entirely selfless, but somehow I managed to convince myself that they were. The growing intensity of my glamour should have been a huge warning sign, but I ignored it as I moved toward Meghan. Holding out my hand, I placed it palm down, on the bare patch of skin just above her heart where every Faelorehn's magic resided.

  "This is where you will sense your power as it begins to grow."

  My own glamour flared and soon the look on Meghan's face changed. No longer did she appear frightened or uncertain. Her eyes paled once again with excitement and her skin seemed to glow with her own magic. The power I had held in check for so long rose to meet with the slight essence of hers, and in that moment my control slipped ever so slightly. But it was enough to shake free of my tight hold. For once, my glamour was pulling away from me, and may all the Celtic gods and goddesses forgive me, I was going to let it go. No fighting it this time, no arguments with my inner voice.

  A thrilling wave of anticipation heated my blood and I felt the corners of my mouth curve into a predatory smile.

  "And here is something you can do with that power, should you wish to."

  Without another thought, I released all holds on my glamour and let it wash over me, erasing my visibility from the world. Meghan's gasp was the only sign that I had executed the spell properly. Pulling my hand away from her skin, I jumped back, just out of reach. It was a small bit of cruelty, teasing Meghan this way in a place she was unfamiliar with, but my power was in control now and it just happened to be in a playful mood. Too bad its idea of fun included such rapacious behavior.