Compulsive Fascinations

by N. Isabelle Blanco

  Exactly what I wanted to hear. Too much so. I shook my head against his chest, refusing to swallow his excuse that easily.

  Calum pressed his nose to my cheek and scented me; a long deep inhale that expanded his chest. “If I saw a picture of you kissing another man, I’d fucking kill him, ex or not. I wanted to break that idiot’s face at the bar yesterday. And I never result to violence. Ever. Do you understand that Liv?”

  This time I nodded, because based on what I’d witnessed of Calum’s personality the last few months, I knew that resulting to violence was definitely not one of his go-to reactions.

  “But if you keep insisting on leaving me, not trusting me, then that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” He moved back and released his hold enough for me to able to look up at him and see his expression. “I’m going to end up losing it and hunting someone down so I can break their face.”

  “I can’t just believe you that easily, Calum,” I said, deciding to go with the truth. “She’s your ex-fiancé. Six years. How could you not still have feelings for her?”

  Calum cupped my neck with both hands, struggling to keep his anger under control. “I didn't love her. How many damn times am I going to tell you? I thought we made a good match and obviously I was wrong.”

  “How the hell can you be with someone for six years and not care for them?” I cried.

  “I cared for her . . . I didn't love her though.”

  God how I wanted to believe him.

  My insecurities didn’t let me.

  Still, I was rapidly losing the fight against the desire to give into him.

  “She is so freaking beautiful—”

  “Not more than you.”

  I went silent at that, my emotions all betraying me at once.

  Calum let go of my neck and wrapped his hands around my waist. He clasped me tight. “No one, Liv. No one has made me lose control as you do. I swear to God I had no idea those pictures stayed there.”

  It all shattered in me. Not the doubt—that would probably never go away—but every bit of my resistance. I couldn’t fight him anymore.

  “Tell me you believe me.” He clutched me to him harder, eyes searching mine. “You have to, Liv.”

  “I don’t know if I ever can,” I confessed wretchedly. “But I won’t run anymore. I . . .” I shook my head. “Can’t.”

  The gleam in his eyes turned vicious, a dangerous combination of anger and need that made my lips part with a shaky exhale.

  He took advantage, leaning down and slipping his tongue inside. His hands dropped down to my ass, kneading it roughly, his hips pushing into me. Teasing me with the hard length of his cock. He continued to thrust against me and squeeze my ass when he ended our kiss. “Promise me you won’t do what you did last night again, Livana. The next time you’re angry, or even a little upset about anything, you will stick around and talk to me about it.”

  He punctuated the demand with a deft roll of his hips that scrambled my brain.

  Stay? Talk about it?

  What couples did.

  Another thrust of his hips that confused me even more.

  His heart beat under my hands, his cock calling for me.

  “Promise me, Livana.”

  “I can’t focus when you do that.” Shivering, I met his next thrust with one of my own, moaning low as hunger thrummed through me.

  We were back together. Still on. I hadn’t completely lost him.

  And, I was losing my mind with the need to reconnect with him, reclaim the dick and body I could’ve sworn I’d never have again.

  He chuckled, a purely satisfied sound. “If you try to leave me without talking to me again, Liv, I’m going to punish you.”

  Punish me? “I—God. What are you talking about?”

  He clenched his hands around my ass and brought me closer, practically fucking me through our clothes at that point. “You like to get spanked.” His voice was a hot whisper near my ear; his tongue a wet coax along the nerves of my neck.

  “Th–that doesn’t sound like a punishment, Calum. That sounds more like—”

  “A reward?” He worked that clever tongue of his along my jaw, down my neck, back up toward my ear, driving me insane. “Promise me and I’ll take you from here. Give it to you.”

  “Ohhh,” I moaned when his tongue dipped inside my ear. “Yes. Whatever you want.”

  “Promise me,” he growled, nipping my ear lobe.

  “I promise. I’ll stay and talk. Now. Please.” I cupped the back of his head, sifting my fingers through the hair on his nape, and placed a soft kiss on his jaw. My pussy ached for his cock to be deep inside it. I needed that connection with him, needed to know that at least that part of him belonged to me. “I need you.”

  Calum clasped me against him tightly and kissed me hard. I’d utterly forgotten where we were, could only focus on the driving need to fuck him.

  He moved away from me, leaving me instantly bereft, overwhelmed with the force of my body’s demands. Bending quickly, he lifted my suitcase up and pulled me to stand in front of him. The warmth of his breath caressed my neck seconds before he whispered, “You’re going to have to walk in front of me and help me hide how hard you’ve made me.”

  Cupping the back of my neck possessively, he lead me back the way we’d come, his pace steady and unhurried, while inside, I dissolved into an impatient mess.

  He paused for two seconds midway through the lobby, letting go of my neck.

  The security guard at the front desk eyed us.

  Considering the circumstances, I couldn’t meet the security guard’s stare; my face grew hot once more.

  He reached around, my phone in his hand. He’d been getting it out of my suitcase. “Make sure your driver’s outside.”

  Hands shaking, I reached for my phone and did as he said. It took less than twenty seconds for my driver to confirm. “He’s outside,” I whispered in a shaky tone.

  He wasted no time, grabbing my nape again and propelling us forward. I shook the whole way, my entire body aware of the fact that we were about to fuck each other inside that limo. “Calum,” I whimpered low, knowing he’d hear the plea in my tone.

  “Shh.” He rubbed small circles into my neck with his thumb. “Almost there, baby.” His rough murmur only made me shake more. “Almost.” It sounded like he spoke more to himself than me. He didn’t bother going through the revolving doors, instead ushering us both through the regular door on the side.

  I saw the white stretch limo waiting by the curve immediately. The driver opened the door and watched as Calum led me toward it. I saw the question in the driver’s eyes, and for a split second, another flash of embarrassment hit me.

  Was I worried he’d let my father know? Yes, but not worried enough to stop this. I needed Calum desperately right then. I’d deal with the consequences later.

  We drew closer to the limo, and I opened my mouth, prepared to introduce Calum to my father’s driver.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a black haired woman standing twenty feet or so away from us. I didn’t know what made me pinpoint her in the middle of the crowd. Maybe it was her bright red blazer.

  Or maybe, the creepy way she stood there, hands at her sides, facing toward us while everyone else hurried in different directions around her.

  It definitely had to do with the weight of her stare. She stood too far for me to make out her facial features clearly, but I felt it on me so acutely that it set off alarms inside me.

  A crowd of what seemed like tourists walked in front of her, pausing to point up at one of the buildings across the street.

  I blinked.

  When the tourists moved, she’d vanished, but that anxiety still sat at the pit of my stomach.

  Calum stopped before the open door to the limo.

  Letting it go, I turned and smiled at the driver. “This is my . . . friend. Mr. Alexander.” Calum tensed behind me. I had no idea what we were, or how I’d handle it if he ended up telling me he wanted more. Bu
t he hadn’t told me that, either, so I’d been left without a definition for what we had. “Mikael had to leave on his own and Mr. Alexander will be riding with me.”

  The driver simply touched two fingers to his hat and nodded politely.

  Okay. Awkward explanation done.

  Calum clearly thought so, too, because no sooner had the last word left my mouth, he urged me inside. I all but stumbled onto the seat and scooted across, making room for his much larger body. He eased inside, pure confidence in that black suit, and I was struck dumb for a moment.

  I’d let him go.

  And he was still here, wanting me.

  Jesus. This man would either be the thing that utterly destroyed me, or the one man that had the power to finally heal me.

  Both thoughts scared me equally as bad.

  8

  Calum placed my suitcase on the floor while the driver closed the door after him. His hazel eyes flickered in my direction, then up toward the front, checking the closed partition.

  Less than a second later, his hands were on me, hauling me toward him before I even had a chance to catch my breath. He kissed me once softly, a tender meeting of wet lips that made me whimper. His eyes glowed and his touch was soft against my cheek.

  He bit into his lower lip with the white of his teeth and crawled over me slowly, until I had no choice but to lean back on the seat. The whole time, he kept caressing my cheek and jaw with slow, drugging moves.

  “Never again, Livana.” The tone of his voice raced through me. His stare burned with urgency and every cell in my body responded to it. “I’m never letting you leave me again.” His large body came over mine, blanketing me. The heat of his skin went right through his clothes and my own, making me burn for naked contact.

  I didn’t answer his statement. What would I really say? I couldn’t promise I wouldn’t run again. Had no guarantee he wouldn’t do something to hurt me. A whirlwind of emotions churned inside me, all for him, and I didn’t have enough courage to even begin speaking them aloud.

  His hand made a slow trail down my neck, moving into the open collar of my blouse. He stopped right at the swell of my breasts and I arched, panting for him.

  “Tell the driver to keep driving until you tell him so.”

  What the hell? He wanted me to actually speak right now? I swallowed, thighs moving together restlessly, my clit throbbing in time with my heartbeat.

  Calum saw it. Of course he did. His eyes took on that satisfied gleam as he watched me squirm for him. “The faster you tell him, baby,” dipping his thumb down and into the cup of my bra, he stopped just shy of my nipple, “the faster I can start fucking you.”

  Hands shaking, I blindly reached above and behind my head, searching out the button to the intercom on the side dashboard.

  Calum just leaned over me, staring at me as I fumbled, his thumb caressing the edge of my hard nipple without really touching it.

  I scowled. “Damn you, help.”

  He only smirked at me, his hand moving down to wrap around my bare thigh. “You’ve got this, baby,” he calmly said, stroking the inside of my thigh.

  Between my legs, I ached with an arousal that I couldn’t understand. Had the thought of losing him been that powerful? Was having him back even more so?

  My finger finally found the small button of the intercom, and the way Calum smiled down at me, making my heart clench, answered both my questions.

  “Morgan,” I said, praying that my voice didn’t sound as raspy as I heard it.

  “Yes, Ms. Payne?” the driver answered.

  “Please keep driving around the city until I tell you to.”

  Not even a moment’s hesitation. “Yes, Ms. Payne.”

  Calum’s smile grew. Just like it always did, it stole the rest of my breath right out of my lungs, dazzling me. Something about a man’s smile could make him even more gorgeous. Considering this was Calum, and he was gorgeous to begin with, the sight of his smile hit me like a kick to the heart every time.

  “Good girl,” he praised me in a low, happy voice, smoothing his hand along my thigh.

  I spread my legs, knowing it’d cause the hem of my skirt to rise higher.

  “You left me aching for you last night,” he admonished softly, purposely taking his sweet time as he neared my pussy.

  I’d been left aching too. My sense of urgency turned me mindless. Calum devoured the sight of me shaking beneath him, his eyes bouncing all over me like he couldn’t decide what part to stare at the longest.

  He popped one button on my blouse. Inched the fingers of his other hand one tiny, teeny inch closer to my core.

  “Please,” I whimpered, clawing at his shoulders, his neck, his hair.

  “Why’d you leave me if you needed me this bad?” He popped another button.

  I pulled on his hair again, my body straining. “You know why,” I growled from behind clenched teeth.

  He was playing me. Turning it all against me.

  And I was fucking powerless to stop him. The need for him had completely taken over. I wouldn’t be able to think clearly again until I’d had him inside me, his dick throbbing and coming against the sensitive tissue of my pussy.

  My answer seemed to anger him. With a snarl, he leaned forward and claimed my mouth with his, shoving his tongue straight inside. Hot, twining velvet. He lapped at my tongue, our lips making slick, wet sounds, biting on my bottom lip softly and making me throb even more.

  “I would have never been able to leave you so easily, damn you.” The words were growled against my lips, right before he took another bite of my bottom one.

  Oh God. Mewling for him, I fisted his hair, tilting my head to take more of his tongue.

  His hand finally reached me, cupping me.

  A harsh hiss left him when he felt how wet he had me. “For me.”

  I nodded frantically at his statement.

  All pretense of calm gone, Calum undid the last buttons on my shirt, spreading it open so that my bra and waist-high skirt were exposed. “How could you entertain the thought of leaving me when you want me like this?”

  Because I want you too damned much, damn you! I gasped, shaking. Lifting my hips to rub my pussy against his hand, I took whatever tiny bit of pleasure I could from him since he was hell-bent on making me wait. “Calum.”

  “Breathe,” he whispered, unclipping the front clasp of my bra.

  My breasts spilled out, the tips hard and elongated.

  He groaned and ducked his head, sucking one nipple into his mouth.

  I cried out, arching into him, hips churning.

  Calum hummed, his tongue lapping at my taut nipple, his profile as he suckled me the sexiest fucking thing I’d ever seen.

  “I’m going to come,” I gasped.

  He slipped his fingers into my panties, fisting them, and yanked them down my legs. “Not yet, you’re not.”

  The more I fought for control of my body, the further it slipped away from me. And, that fucker wanted to toy with me right then? “Why are you doing this to me right now?” I whimpered miserably.

  “Because you thought you could just leave me. That you had a choice.” His words registered a split second before his hand came back at me.

  He slid two perfect, long fingers into me, stretching me languidly, taking his time filling me.

  It felt good. Oh, so good. I throbbed, aching. Just needed one more pass of his finger along my trembling inner walls. I groaned his name long and deep, arching my back to offer more of my breasts to his greedy mouth.

  He released my breast long enough to capture my stare with his own, then he licked around my nipple, watching my reactions. “I’ll never let you forget who this belongs to, Liv.”

  I writhed beneath him, head thrashing side to side. “No,” the whimpered word left me even as my hips lifted off the seat to meet his next thrust. I was mindless, owned, but regardless of all that, I still couldn’t give him that much power.

  Calum thrust his fingers into my pulsing
pussy and left them there. Deep. Stretching me. His thumb brushed softly across my clit each time I moved. “You feel that, baby? This pussy is mine.” He somehow pushed in even further, curling his fingers upward.

  I jerked when he pressed into my g-spot. He did it again, pressing hard against it. My body tensed, my nipples going tighter with my impending orgasm. “Ahh . . . baby.”

  He groaned at my mewls.

  “Please. Yes.” I lifted my hips up, down, fucking his fingers with my throbbing cunt. “Yes. Yes. I’m going to come. Calum—”

  He pulled his fingers out of me with a loud growl.

  I nearly sobbed with the loss.

  Muttering a soft, “fuck,” Calum fell back onto the seat, his shaking hands practically tearing at his belt.

  When he slid his pants down enough for his hard cock to bounce out, I whispered his name in a needy tone, my thighs clenching together.

  “Come here.” He reached for me, fisting my hair and urging me to rise up on my knees. I flipped my leg over him. My hands fisted the material around his shoulders.

  Calum’s hand dove back between my legs, palming my aching, soaked flesh. “I own this pussy.” He let go of my hair to give me a harsh spank that left me gasping. “I own this ass. I own every damned shiver and moan your body can give.” He hauled me even closer, pressing his palm right into my throbbing clit.

  I could only hold on, still gasping.

  Both excited and afraid at the way he commanded me.

  His hand soothed the cheek he’d spanked, only to deliver an even harder slap seconds later. “But most importantly Liv, I fucking own you, and I’m never letting you go. Even if you try to run. Even if you end up hating me. Doesn’t matter. You’ll still live for my cock and everything it can give you.” Another spank, this one even harder than the first two.

  Those words ate at my mind, slipping past already weakened defenses and obliterating every bit of my denial. I should have contradicted the truth in them. Should have rebelled against his claim over me.