A Lethal Legacy

by P. C. Zick

  "But Kristina is greedy. So be a good grandmother to her, but don't fall for her stories. Make her stand on her own, Mom. Remember, you have nothing to feel guilty about so don't let her use that against you. Trust me on this one point. If she finds your Achilles' heel, she will use it." Gary's voice started to rise, and his coughing began again.

  "Gary, please don't get upset. Of course, I'll watch over Kristina. Don't worry about that. I think things will improve the longer she's away from that mother of hers."

  "Promise me, both of you, try to love her, but give her more than that. Give her the strength to stand on her own without either of you propping her up."

  "We promise, Gary," I said. I could tell these last few words were said with all the strength he could muster. "We'll help give Kristina what she needs."

  With that, Gary fell back against the pillow and closed his eyes. We quietly left the room, both Claire and I wrapped in our own private thoughts. For Claire, hearing the truth about her granddaughter probably came as a shock, but she would digest it and deal with it. To me, it seemed the guilt that Gary had carried for the last two decades left his body and floated away from him. Then it landed and perched itself right on my shoulder. I could taste the bile rising in my mouth as I realized that Kristina had already found my Achilles' heel.

  He calmly contemplated the amber bottle of pills on the table before him. He picked up the container and caressed it with his right hand before carefully flipping off the lid revealing the small round pills that promised him a final release if he chose to take it.

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Near midnight, Rick came to wake me. He and Claire had been sitting with Gary who had not wakened since we talked to him earlier. Rick called the doctor when he couldn't rouse Gary for his evening meds. He also hadn't had to change his sheets all day nor had Gary used the bedpan. The doctor informed Rick that most likely Gary had slipped into a coma. He doubted that he would ever regain consciousness. He told Rick that Gary's body was beginning to shut down. He also told Rick what we could expect to occur in the next few days or hours, however long it took Gary to let go.

  After Rick explained everything to me, my mind went back over our life together and as always, I wondered if I could have helped Gary more. But then, I had my own troubles. Although I never faced my own feelings as well as I tried to help Gary face his.

  I wanted to be published so badly that I didn't think about the consequences of getting that first book out in the market. I went ahead only slightly aware of the currents flowing and pulsating all around me, first with Kelsey, and then with Elizabeth.

  Ernest Haslett liked the book, but wanted to find a larger publishing house to handle it. He decided to represent me, for a small fee, and I was flattered that he thought that much of the book.

  After Gary read the book, he handed it back to me.

  "Do you think I need to change anything?" I asked him as he tried to avoid my eyes.

  "No changes needed," he said. He didn't say anything more.

  By late 1975, Kelsey had begun working even longer hours at Domino's. I didn't mind because when she was home, she harped about buying a house that would be closer to the new corporate headquarters now under construction. I liked the old house on Main Street just fine. She hated paying rent. I liked the lack of responsibility for maintenance. She hated not being able to take out walls and paint at whim. Some days when she talked about changing the interior of our apartment, I felt I was back in high school dating Sally, my first girlfriend, or remodeling the house with Allison.

  Then one night Kelsey met Allison, my first wife, for the first time. Domino's had just announced its intention to help Huron High School fund business classes in the coming school year, and we were invited to attend the reception where the formal partnership was announced.

  Kelsey and I stood near the food table talking to several of her colleagues when I looked up and saw Allison enter. Since becoming principal, she wore tailored suits and silk blouses, and every time I had seen her in the last six years, a string of pearls adorned her neck. Very classic, very professional, and very elegant. Allison's cuteness and perkiness had been groomed into what her parents wanted her to be. She was a very handsome woman with an important job. However, I'm sure her parents wished she’d remarried after our divorce, if for no other reason than to change her last name from Townsend.

  "Allison, hello. You look lovely as usual tonight," I said as I leaned down to kiss her cheek. We managed to remain cordial and warm with one another after the bitterness left.

  "Ed, good to see you," she said as she looked over my shoulder at Kelsey.

  "You've never met my wife, have you? Allison, this is Kelsey. Kelsey, Allison Townsend."

  They shook hands and appraised one another.

  "It is very nice to finally meet you, Kelsey."

  "Same here. I thought you might be at this shindig since you're the big shot at HHS," Kelsey said as she popped a crab puff in her mouth.

  "Yes, and you are an up-and-coming executive at Domino's, correct? I can’t tell you how much your support will mean to our school. If you had anything to do with it, I thank you."

  "It was really Tom Monahan's idea. You know, wanting to help young kids get a chance for job training. However, I sat in on the meetings and know how important it is. I especially want to encourage the girls to become involved so they can see that they really do have choices now in the work world. Just look at me," she said with a wide grin as she beat her fists on her chest.

  Allison gave her a small smile, the Mona Lisa smile. No one can tell what she is thinking, but it can't be good. "We encourage all of our students to become the very best that they can be at Huron High. You will have to excuse me, I see some of my PTA parents over there, and I must greet them. It was a pleasure to have finally met Ed's new wife. And Ed, it is always a pleasure," she said squeezing my hand and reaching up to give me a quick brush with her lips. None of it escaped the glare of Kelsey's eyes.

  "Sure thing, Allison. See ya around," Kelsey said.

  That night Kelsey badgered me endlessly about Allison. She had never seemed too interested in my first marriage before this meeting. Somehow lying in bed with my second wife who wanted to talk about the woman I had divorced did not appeal to me or make me want to make love.

  "What's wrong, Ed? Did seeing Allison make you less horny for me?" she asked when I couldn't seem to get aroused after all of her questions.

  "No, but you talking about her endlessly has dampened my desires somewhat."

  "I didn't expect her to be so, I don't know, so sophisticated, so suave, so polished."

  "Someone like that would never marry me, right?"

  "No, well, yes, I guess so. You are pretty unconcerned with those things. But you always manage to remain cool and calm in public so that no one would ever guess how miserable you are in a suit and tie."

  "Please, can we go to sleep now? I've got a big day tomorrow." I pulled the covers up over my head so the discussion and the attempt at lovemaking would end for the night.

  "What kind of car did you two have when you were married?" Kelsey began as soon as I sat down to breakfast the next morning.

  "Who?"

  "Who? How many times have you been married? You and Allison, of course. What kind of car did you have?"

  "For god's sake, Kelsey, let it go. It's not important."

  "It's important to me. What kind?"

  "A Mercedes, an old one. A hand-me-down from her parents," I said not wanting to look directly at her.

  "I see. What about the house? I know you lived somewhere on the old west side. Where?"

  "Near Huron and Seventh. Behind those large Victorians."

  "What kind of house?"

  "It was an old colonial. There aren't very many over there, and her parents wanted to give us the house for a wedding present. It needed a lot of work, and we spent most of our short marriage redoing it. Allison still lives there." I decided to give her what she wanted so
maybe she would stop. "How come you never asked these questions before?"

  "Because your first marriage never seemed real to me until I met Allison. So if my parents were rich, would you let them buy us a house?"

  "Never. I've told you, I don't want the responsibility of a house. And I'd never want you to hold it over my head that I couldn't afford to buy the house."

  "But if you sell your book, you'll get a big advance, right?" She hadn't asked about the book in months.

  "Not necessarily. I might get a small advance, but it's doubtful. The book won't make me rich."

  "Or rather you don't want it to," she said thoughtfully.

  "Possibly," I said.

  Thankfully, the questions stopped there as I watched Kelsey slowly stir her coffee. I hoped she would forget all about Allison and a house. She worried me lately as I watched her changing before my eyes from the young college girl who cared about causes into the successful executive who cared about the outward trappings of a seemingly prosperous life.

  Allison and I had had very little contact with each other since our divorce even though we lived in the same town and worked in the same profession. However, our orbits circled around different planets. Allison cultivated and fertilized her relationships with the business community with the help of her father. Probably the connection with Domino's came from one such cultivation with Tom Monahan. Kelsey and I, on the other hand, socialized with the art community and our friends from work, hardly the same social path as my ex-wife.

  However, Allison and I did keep in touch. One of us would call the other once or twice a year just to check on one another. For some reason, I never told Kelsey about these calls. It never seemed very important to our marriage.

  The day after the awkward meeting, Allison called me at school and asked me to stop by the house on my way home from work, even though it was slightly out of the way. She wanted to show me something.

  When I arrived, she had already changed from the business suit attire of her workday into jeans and a sweater. She looked young and perky once again, like the Allison of fifteen years before.

  "Would you like a drink, Ed? I just opened this bottle of wine," she said.

  "Sure, Ally, that sounds fine."

  We sat on the couch that we had purchased together in our only year of marriage, probably the first major purchase we had made. We sipped our wine quietly slipping back into an old comfortable feeling.

  "Thanks for coming over. When I saw you last night, I realized how much I've missed you and these quiet moments," Allison said.

  "I've missed them, too," and when I said it, I realized that it was true. We had been together for a long time. I looked at her shiny hair and gave it a slight pat.

  "What happened to us, Eddie?" She looked at me with tears forming in her large brown eyes.

  "Oh, Ally, who knows?" I said pulling her close to my chest.

  She began tentatively kissing my neck, and I was astounded by the intense pleasure of her lips against my skin. I lifted her face to mine, and we kissed for one long languorous moment. I forgot about everything, except wondering about how far away the bedroom was or whether Allison would agree to making love on the couch unlike during our marriage. I definitely forgot about our divorce and about Kelsey in this moment of intense rediscovery of my lost lover.

  "Ed, oh, Ed," she whispered over and over again in my ear when our lips finally stopped their journey down memory lane.

  I pulled the sweater over her head and looked at her small yet firm breasts still encased in their white bra that I managed to remove quicker than I'd ever done anything in my life.

  "Ally, is this all right? I've missed you so much." I was overwhelmed at the sight and smell of her and wanted to possess her completely now.

  "Hurry, please hurry," she said in answer as she began unbuttoning and unzipping the clothes still covering me.

  When we finished, we lay back down together on the couch and tried to regain our breath. I pulled the afghan that rested on the back of the couch over our bodies so we could lie there peacefully reveling in the beauty and calm afterglow of spontaneous sex.

  "What about Kelsey?" Allison asked.

  "What about her?" The first stab of guilt hit me.

  "What will you tell her? How will you tell her?"

  "Tell her? Tell her what?" I didn't understand what she meant.

  "Tell her about us. You two don't belong together. That was painfully obvious last night. You can't go on living with her now that we’ve rediscovered each other.” She faltered when she looked at my face that must have registered disbelief.

  "Ally, this was wonderful, but it doesn't change anything," I said.

  Immediately, Allison got up and began pulling on her jeans and sweater. She became the steel trap of yesterday, cool and reserved.

  "You better go, Ed," she said as she threw my clothes on top of me.

  "Come on, Ally, you couldn't have believed that I'd leave Kelsey and move back here?" I asked.

  "Just go, please," she said as she walked up the stairs. "Just tell me one thing, Ed. Did you ever cheat on me like you just did on Kelsey?" Then she started up the stairs again not waiting for my reply.

  She wouldn't have believed me if I had told her the truth. I had never even contemplated adultery. Today had been the first time, and it was totally unexpected and unplanned on my part. I didn't feel particularly bad about it except for hurting Allison and the potential of hurting Kelsey if she ever found out. What Allison and I had done seemed quite natural. I saw it as a spiritual meeting of two people who had once loved each other very much. I couldn't understand why Allison didn't view it in the same way.

  I headed home grateful for the several hours I had to recover before Kelsey came home. She usually worked until seven or eight at the office. We rarely even ate dinner together anymore.

  When I pulled in the driveway, I saw Elizabeth's car parked out front. When I got out of my car, she opened her driver's door and yelled over to me.

  "Ed, can we talk?"

  "Sure, come on in, Elizabeth. Good to see you," I said as we hugged in the front yard.

  "How's Gary?" I asked.

  "Fine. Can we just go inside, please?" She seemed on edge, and I quickly unlocked the front door and led her into the living room.

  "Would you like some coffee or tea?" I asked.

  "Yes, if it's not too much trouble, a cup of tea, perhaps?"

  "Sure, come on into the kitchen, and we can talk there, OK?"

  I began measuring water and placing cups on the counter. I looked around for some cookies or something in the cupboards to put out. I realized that Kelsey and I rarely ate at home and so our cupboards were nearly bare. Luckily, I found some tea bags.

  "What's up, Elizabeth?" I asked as I put two steaming cups on the table.

  "I was hoping you would know," she said, and then the tears began. She took a long time to control herself, and I felt a certain sense of dread and déjà vu at what I might hear next.

  "It's Gary," she said. "He's changed in the last few months," and she began crying all over again.

  "It's OK, Elizabeth, take your time." I patted her hand sympathetically, and she looked at me gratefully as she tried to regain her composure.

  "Thanks, Ed, I knew you'd understand. You always seem to know just what to do and say."

  I only knew what to do because I had done it before. I had known Gary all my life, and now I was comforting his second wife and hoping against all odds that Gary hadn’t done something stupid.

  "Has something happened?" I asked.

  "No, that's the problem. Nothing happens, especially in our bedroom."

  Once she began, there was no stopping her. I had heard it all before but this time from a completely different type of woman, but the scenes were the same. No sex, no communication, late night business meetings, and a general uneasiness in Gary's demeanor.

  " I think he's having an affair," she said when she finished relating the litany of his dis
tant behavior. The tears began once again.

  When Elizabeth had finally spent herself with the saga of Gary, I sent her home with a half-hearted promise that I would speak to her husband.

  "You're the only one he ever listens to," she said before she headed off into the night.

  Then he must not listen to anyone at all, I thought. I knew that talking to Gary would be futile, but I also knew because of my strong bond with him, I would make the attempt. However, right now, the day had taken its toll, and it wasn't even 9 p.m. The icing on the cake would be a call from Pam.

  I poured myself a scotch and went into the dark living room to sit and contemplate the events of the last five hours. I also wondered where Kelsey could be. She was much later than usual. She hadn't called, at least not since I had been home, and she almost always let me know when she would be working late.

  I poured another scotch and thought of Allison and how she looked when I had removed her sweater. Soon another one obliterated that picture. I saw her icy glare as she stood on the stairs and asked me about cheating on her. Then I thought of Elizabeth and her suspicions about her husband. She was probably right; Gary probably had started having an affair or at least gone back to his old ways to try and ease his pain. Elizabeth never thought of any other possibility than Gary spending time with other women on his evenings away from her.

  I heard the front door open and the sound of someone tripping as Kelsey banged into the narrow walls of the hallway of our apartment. When she appeared in the doorway of the living room, I could tell she’d been drinking.

  "Hi, honey, sorry I didn't call. Last minute happy hour, you know, all the guys from work. How come you're sitting here in the dark?" she asked as she proceeded to turn on the lights, disrupting my solitude.

  "Rough day, I guess." I saluted her with my empty glass. "I better catch up with you," I said as I went to refill it.

  "We went to the Holiday Inn, and you know they just put in a new disco there. The DJ's great. Lots of fun. Maybe next time you'll go?"