How (Not) to Fall in Love

by Lisa Brown Roberts

  I stood there trembling, whether from the shock of the burn, the embarrassment of my espresso disaster, or my proximity to Lucas, I didn’t know.

  He unwrapped the towel and I winced. “I don’t need to go to the ER. It’s not that bad.”

  “I’ll be the judge of that,” he said, glancing at me from under those disgustingly long eyelashes.

  “Oh really? Are you in med school, too?”

  He smirked. “No. But I’ve taken first aid classes. And I’ve seen Bella do damage before.”

  “On Liz?”

  “Yeah. When she first got this machine.” He shook his head.

  “The emergency drawer,” I said. Liz had mentioned it before, but I’d never looked inside it. “Maybe there’s a first aid kit in there.”

  Lucas frowned. “Emergency drawer?”

  I pointed to the red skull and crossbones painted on a drawer under the counter, and was baffled when he dropped my hand and burst out laughing.

  “What?” I tingled from his touch and the burn.

  Lucas yanked open the drawer and pulled out a hand-lettered sign which read, “Beautiful Bella is having a time-out. Regular coffee and tea only today. Sorry. Try us again tomorrow. We hope she’ll be in a better mood then.”

  “Liz used this a lot when she first opened up.” Lucas slid the sign back in the drawer. He shot me another sexy smile as he headed for the back of the store. “I’ll go to the real emergency drawer and get the first aid kit.”

  God, now I felt like a total idiot. I sighed and put away the clean cups with my uninjured hand. I just wanted to get home and talk to Mom about what I’d discovered about Dad, and show her the places I’d already marked on the atlas.

  Lucas reappeared quickly with the first aid kit, housed in a vintage jewelry box, not a plastic tub with a giant red cross on the lid.

  “What’s that?” I asked, as he removed the cap from a slender silver tube.

  “This is some burn gel Liz got when she was first taming Bella. It’s the same stuff chefs use for burns in the kitchen.” He waved a white roll at me. “And this is gauze. Maybe you’ve heard of it?”

  “Ha.” I glared at him and muttered, “I’m not in a joking mood.”

  He looked up from the gauze as he unwound it. “Why not? Now seems like a good time for a joke. It’ll help take your mind off the pain.”

  “The pain is the least of my worries,” I said. “I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

  “Yeah? Like what?” Lucas took my hand in his and smoothed cool gel over the burn. The sensation blocked out all rational thought for a few seconds, until he reached for the gauze and wrapped it gently around my hand.

  “Earth to Darcy,” he said, letting go of my bandaged hand and looking into my eyes. “So what’s on your mind besides the pain, which I just totally eliminated for you?”

  He’d taken away the pain, all right, but not in the way he thought. I kept my eyes lowered while I composed myself before answering him.

  “It’s some stuff I figured out today. About my dad.” I raised my head, blinking quickly, hoping he couldn’t see any evidence of me swooning over him.

  He leaned against the sink. “You want to talk about it?”

  I hesitated. In some ways, it was easy to talk to him. But the person I really needed to talk to was Mom. “Maybe later,” I said. “Right now I need to get home.”

  “Will you be able to drive okay with your hand like that?” he asked as he packed up the first aid box.

  “Not an issue. I took the bus.”

  “What about the truck?” He glanced up.

  “I’m trying to save gas money. That thing gets like ten miles to the gallon. Plus, it’s been blowing more blue smoke lately.”

  “How long is your bus ride?”

  “About forty-five minutes from my house to here. I’ve got one transfer. I don’t mind, though. It gives me time to read and listen to music.”

  “Buses don’t run as often this late,” Lucas said. “When were you supposed to catch one home?”

  Oh crap. I looked at my watch. 10:33. I’d missed the 10:19, plus we still had to finish closing up. I pulled my phone out of my pocket to check the schedule app I’d downloaded.

  I’d be lucky to catch the 11:21. Great. I sighed heavily.

  “I’ll give you a ride,” Lucas said.

  I stared at him. Ride home with Lucas? Just the two of us?

  “Uh…I’m on the other side of town. It’s okay. I’ll just wait in here until it’s time for the bus.”

  “No way,” he insisted. “The later it gets, the weirder the bus passengers get.”

  “Worse than the Harry Potter Knight Bus?”

  He grinned. “Yeah. Besides, Charlie would kill me if I let you wait here by yourself for the ghost bus. Let me help you close out the register, then we can blow this pop stand.”

  Liz had left me written notes, but I sat back and cradled my hand while Lucas pushed buttons until the register spewed out a long tape showing all the day’s sales. We counted all the cash and then added up the credit card receipts.

  Lucas grinned. “Now let’s see how much free stuff Liz gave away.”

  “Huh?”

  “Pay attention,” he commanded.

  The register tape said we had sold $179.45 worth of food and drink. The cash and credit card receipts added up to $159.37.

  “Net loss of $20.08,” Lucas said. He sighed. “I don’t know how she does it.”

  “Does what?” I was confused.

  “Gives away stuff for free and still manages to keep this place open.” He shrugged. “Charlie says the rent for these places is really cheap. Somehow the two of them manage to pay it each month.”

  “Does Charlie give away stuff, too?”

  Lucas grinned. “Are you kidding? Of course he does. He’s a total sucker. So is Liz. Guess they’re made for each other that way.”

  “That’s pretty cool.” A bitter laugh escaped me. “Maybe if things hit bottom for Mom and me, we can get free food from Liz. And some clothes from Charlie.” I wanted to snatch the words back as soon as I said them.

  Lucas gazed at me for what felt like forever. “How bad is it, Darcy?”

  The directness of his question made me wince. “So bad I don’t even know how to talk about it,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

  “Then maybe you should talk about it.” He crossed his arms over his chest. What would it feel like to have his arms around me? To have him hold me while I spilled out all my fears?

  I turned away and shrugged. “Denial is working pretty well so far.”

  “Maybe for a while. But the truth beats the crap out of denial. Eventually.” He sighed heavily. “Believe me, I know.”

  I looked at him, surprised. “Yeah?” Curiosity consumed me. What skeletons lurked in the closet of Mr. Magic Hands? What truths had he run from?

  He turned back to the register and busied himself locking the cash and credit card receipts into a small metal box bedazzled with purple and pink rhinestones. “I’ll show you where to hide this, then we should go.”

  The hiding place was in Liz’s fairy cave, under a table covered by star-and-moon patterned fabric. The table looked like it might tip over from the weight of the haphazard stacks of books.

  “Very secure,” I observed.

  Lucas looked up from where he knelt on the floor, grinning. “It works for Liz. You are now only the fourth person who knows the secret location of Ft. Knox.”

  “Hmm…Liz, Charlie, you and me?” I guessed.

  “Yep.” He stood up and brushed his hands on his jeans. “Let’s roll. My car’s in the alley.”

  After double-checking the front door to make sure it was locked, we turned off the lights in Fairyland. We emerged from the back door into the alley, which was shrouded in darkness.

  “Did Liz give you a key?” Lucas asked.

  “What? Oh yeah, she did.” I dug in the pocket
of my jeans, glancing over my shoulder nervously.

  “Are you scared?” There was a hint of laughter in his voice.

  I glanced at him and saw his perfect lips curve into a mocking smile. Stubbornly, I jammed the key into the lock, once I managed to find the keyhole in the dark. So what if I was scared? Any normal person would be nervous in a dark alley. Just because Magic Hands was used to it didn’t make me weird.

  “She definitely needs a light back here,” I muttered.

  “Yeah. But she and Charlie always leave together. Plus she knows everybody in the ’hood. She feeds most of the homeless guys so I don’t think she worries about it.”

  The lock clicked into place. “Ready?” I asked. My eyes had adjusted well enough to the dark to see that he was still grinning. So what if I was jittery and wanted to get out of the dark alley? I wasn’t as brave as Liz.

  “Don’t worry, Shaker Girl,” Lucas said, and before I could respond, he slung his arm over my shoulders. “My car is right over there. I think we’ll make it there in one piece. Plus you’ve got those badass, shirt-stealing ninja moves if anyone jumps us.”

  I went completely mute. How could I expect to keep up a witty convo with him so close, with the warmth of his arm and the proximity of the rest of him driving all thoughts out of my head? Neither of us spoke as we walked down the alley toward a black car. It was awkweirdly awesome.

  Lucas dropped his arm to unlock the passenger door of his car. The physical contact had been way too short, and I sighed.

  Out loud.

  “You okay?” he asked, leaning on the door, waiting for me to get in.

  “Oh yeah. I’m just…um, tired.” How lame. I sank into the passenger seat of his muscle car.

  When Lucas slid into the driver’s seat, my senses went into hyperdrive and I told myself to get a grip.

  “I just need to let someone know I’m running a little late.” He had his phone out, fingers flying over a text.

  Stomach plummet. Of course. The goddess Heather was waiting.

  “I really don’t mind taking the bus,” I said. “You have plans and—”

  “Don’t be stupid,” he cut me off. “I’m giving you a ride. My plans are flexible.”

  He started the car and we rolled slowly down the alley.

  “Do you remember where I live?” I asked.

  He shrugged. “Basically. You can direct me when we get close.”

  I nodded, then he plugged in his iPod and a familiar song flooded the car.

  “You like Phoenix?” I asked, surprised. That was twice he’d played some of my favorite music.

  He glanced at me, then back at the road. “I can change it to something else.” He reached for his iPod, but I stopped him with my bandaged hand, then yanked it away like I’d been shocked.

  “No, don’t change it. I love this song.”

  Lucas smiled in the blue glow from the dashboard and we drove without talking, just listening to the music. If I closed my eyes and filtered out most of reality, this could be a perfect night, a perfect date. Except for the small detail of Lucas already having a girlfriend and my life completely falling apart. Oh, and my dad being MIA on some sort of crazy clonehenge quest.

  “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked. Even with heat pouring out of the car vents, a shiver slid through me.

  “Talk about what?”

  “Whatever was worrying you earlier. Whatever distracted you enough to make you burn yourself.”

  I watched his profile. “You think that’s why I burned myself?”

  He shrugged. “You said you had a lot on your mind. Something about your dad.”

  I huffed out a sigh. “It’s a long story. And it’s…just weird. I’m still trying to figure it out.”

  Lucas was quiet for a few moments. “I’m a good listener,” he said. “Just ask Pickles. I listen to her ramble all the time.”

  I laughed. “Her stories are probably much more interesting than mine.”

  He didn’t smile. “I doubt that.” He glanced at me. “Seriously, Darcy. If you ever want to talk about…all that’s going on…” He paused, and then spoke again. “My mom left, too. Like your dad.”

  My stomach twisted. “She did?”

  He looked at me, then back at the road. “Yeah. So I know what you’re going through, sort of. Though my mom wasn’t famous, so the whole country wasn’t making jokes about it. That must be hard.”

  He’d opened a door, but I wasn’t ready to walk through it, so we drove the rest of the way without speaking, the music filling our silence.

  “Tell me where to turn,” Lucas prompted me as the houses we passed increased in size. I guided him to my address.

  He turned toward me. “You shouldn’t be taking the bus and walking home this late by yourself. If you can’t afford to gas up your truck, I can give you rides home on the nights you work late.”

  “But…it’s completely out of your way.”

  He ran a hand through his hair and shrugged. “I like driving.”

  I sat there, speechless, until he shifted the car into park, leaving the engine running. “Come on.” He opened his door. “I’ll walk you up.”

  “I’m not going to get jumped,” I joked, though secretly I was thrilled when he actually walked around the car and opened my door, like a gentleman in one of my favorite books. No Regency duke would’ve dropped off his date and stayed in his carriage texting.

  He smiled at me, but didn’t say anything as we walked quickly up the cobblestones Mom had imported from England. We stood in front of the massive double doors while Lucas dug into his pocket and the wind bit through our coats.

  “Here.” He handed me the silver tube and roll of gauze from Liz’s first aid box. “Put more gel on your burn tomorrow and rewrap it.”

  I took the first aid supplies, impressed by his thoughtfulness. “Oh, wow. Thanks.” I didn’t know what else to say. His kindness rendered me speechless.

  The universe needed to spread out its gifts a little more evenly instead of dumping them all onto one person. Lucas had his act together in a way I never would. Smart, composed under pressure, thoughtful, not to mention smoking hot. I sighed and unlocked the door. Toby waited, wriggling and whimpering. He launched himself at Lucas.

  Lucas grinned and bent down to pet him. “How’s my Toby?” Toby slobbered all over him.

  “I think he is your Toby,” I remarked. Add beloved by dogs to the list of his attributes. “Even I don’t get that kind of greeting.”

  He laughed and stood up. “I’m sure you’re his favorite. But I could definitely rob your house if I wanted to.”

  Another gust of wind blew snow around us. I hesitated. Should I ask him in? Was my mom in a wine coma yet, or would she be awake enough for me to tell her about the henges? And what about his “flexible plans?”

  “Do you want to come in? For a minute. To warm up before you head back across town,” I said quickly. I thought of one way we could warm up and immediately wished I hadn’t said that.

  He shook his head. “That’d be great any other time, but I’m sort of running late.”

  I knew my face burned with embarrassment. Hopefully he’d just think it was windburn.

  “Sure. Well, thanks again.” I stepped inside, ready to slam the door so that I could collapse in private. He’d churned up all sorts of emotions tonight that I didn’t want to deal with.

  “I’ll see you soon,” Lucas said. He held my gaze for a moment, his eyes hooded in the darkness, and then hurried down the steps to his car.

  I raised my hand in a half wave. He saluted me with a grin, then slid into the car and drove away into the night, taillights disappearing too quickly.

  There went my dream guy. Who happened to be unavailable. Not to mention completely unattainable.

  I slammed the front door behind me, as if that would keep my feelings for Lucas outside, too. I had way too much else going on in my life to be distracted by hi
m. I needed to focus my energy on Dad, and Mom. I was the sanest of the three of us. I had to do something to keep us from crashing, because I was pretty sure we were careening out of control down a twisting road that dropped into nowhere.

  The house was silent. No late night TV noises. After checking to make sure all the doors were locked and lights were out, I trudged upstairs with Toby at my heels.

  I paused at Mom’s door and heard her snoring. Great. The more she drank, the louder she snored. So much for telling her what I’d figured out from Dad’s postcards and my online research.

  “Come on, Tobester,” I whispered. “It’s time for bed.”

  Exhaustion overwhelmed me. I didn’t have the energy to look up more clonehenges tonight. I’d do it tomorrow. Maybe then Mom would be in a better condition to listen to me.

  Toby and I snuggled together under my covers, listening to the wind howl outside. I closed my eyes. “I’m going to find you, Dad,” I whispered. “I don’t know how, but I will.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  October 27

  “Now!” Mom screamed into the phone. “You get over here right now, J.J. You can tell me in person what the hell this is.” Mom held a stack of papers in her trembling hand. She ended the call and threw her phone against the wall. Plastic bits went flying, making Toby cower and slink away.

  I reassembled Mom’s phone while she disappeared into the wine cellar. Maybe tonight she’d let me have a glass. I shuddered and shook my head. That wouldn’t solve anything; she was living proof of that. I picked up the papers, pages and pages of legalese, but one word jumped out at me.

  Eviction.

  My runner’s legs morphed from muscle to liquid in seconds. I sank onto a kitchen barstool, my eyes blurring with tears as I tried to decipher the document. Mom came back into the kitchen, clumsily juggling three bottles of wine. My stomach clenched as I looked at her.

  “Please, Mom. Not now. Can’t you go without drinking for just one day?”

  She glared at me. “You see what that says? They’re kicking us out, Darcy. Kicking us out of our own fucking house.”

  “Mom!” She’d never dropped the f-bomb. Ever.