She nodded and grabbed awkwardly at him. He settled himself over her shoulder to balance his weight over her smaller frame. He was about to urge her to go when she did, as fast as he could hope under the circumstances. He directed her around the corner and up two blocks, getting away from the area just as mortal law enforcement came onto the scene.
“Set me down,” he told her, well aware they could only get so far without notice. She released him as gently as she could, setting him with a soft thump on the sidewalk. He grit his teeth as his body convulsed in agony.
“Sit and look curious,” he ordered, and tucked his ruined leg to his chest. He wrapped his long coat around it as another squad car sped by them – a pair of innocent bystanders.
They rested as long as they could. Ian fussed over him silently, straightening his coat, wiping blood from his face. He let her. She was in a state of shock, but still functioning. A relief. When the police officer came to shoo them away, Sebastian nodded amiably. Ian followed his lead as if they had planned it.
“We were sitting here, officer, the whole time,” he told the mortal. “We are nothing to worry about. My leg is bad, you see, but nothing serious.”
“Well, move along,” the mortal agreed. “There’ve been shots fired. You need to move along.”
Ian stood and offered him a hand. He took it, again pleased at her level of composure. She pulled him up while the mortal ignored Sebastian’s butchered leg.
“You will have to drive,” he told her, handing her his keys. “Can you drive a manual car?”
She shook her head.
“Then you will learn.”
“Move along,” the mortal urged. Sebastian nodded once, leaned on Ian, and moved them down the street.
IAN
“What happened?”
Josephine’s anxious voice managed to pull me out of the stupor I’d fallen into – funny how I didn’t know I was in a stupor until I came out of it. I’d been handling everything calmly while another part of me slipped away and went numb. Sebastian had an arm slung over my shoulder, using me as a crutch because his leg was a complete mess.
“I was shot.” Sebastian let Josephine take over my job as crutch.
“I can see that,” she said. “By who? How? Why?”
We got off the elevator, Sebastian hopping alongside Josephine. Amanda stared. She’d come back out of her room only to have this sight walk in on her. Sebastian was eaten up from head to toe, smattered in his own blood. Josephine eased him down onto one of the chairs while he gritted his teeth and hissed in pain. I winced.
“Specter ambushed me,” he said, relaxing cautiously. “He issued challenge and turned this on me when I accepted. An assault rifle, I think.”
“Holy shit,” Amanda whispered.
“Hello, Amanda,” Sebastian said back. He looked back up at Josephine. “Several bullets are lodged inside.”
She nodded grimly. I glanced between them, wondering what he meant.
“Ian, will you get me the things from Sebastian’s dresser?” Josephine asked.
I shuddered. That was what he meant.
“What are you –” Amanda started, then trailed off. Like she’d changed her mind about asking.
I went to get the stuff. Before I could think about it too hard.
I knew where to find Sebastian’s room – all too well. I had to fight a guilty cringe as I found his door and let myself in. The things on the dresser were right where I’d seen them last. Scalpel, forceps, needle, thread. Was that normal stuff for vampires to have?
Don’t think about it.
I took the tray and headed for the door. I didn’t get far. Josephine came down the hall, half-leading, half-carrying Sebastian, his coat and shirt stripped off. Red blossoms exploded all over him, mostly across his chest, all of them with a dark, gaping center. Some were tiny, others huge. I gasped.
“I thought it would be easier in here,” Josephine said. “That way he can lie down and Amanda doesn’t have to watch.”
I nodded, grateful for Amanda’s sake, shocked to see Sebastian like that. I stood back to let them past, cringing as Sebastian limped by me. Josephine spread him out on his bed, face up. He let out a sigh that made me ache.
“Can I have those please, Ian?” Josephine asked. Sebastian had shut his eyes. His jaw was tight.
Wordless, I handed Josephine the tray. She took it without looking up and went to the side of the bed. When she picked up a forceps and bent over him, I left.
On the other side of the door I paused, wondering what would have happened if Josephine hadn’t been here. If Sebastian had asked me to help him.
My face pinched up.
That’s not how it happened. I don’t have to worry about it.
Amanda was my concern. She had to be ravenous by now. I had been before I had a chance to eat, and she’d had to wait here for me. I stopped in my room to change shirts; the one I’d had on had a bloody impression of an arm across the shoulders. I kicked the bloody one under the bed with the other clothes I didn’t ever want to see again.
Amanda was wandering back toward the bedroom when I came out into the hall, her face a mix of horror and curiosity.
“They don’t need our help,” I said, setting a hand on her arm to turn her around.
Amanda gave me a worried look over her shoulder.
“He’ll be fine,” I said vaguely. I had suddenly remembered Alec. I could have used his help getting Sebastian out of there. He was so concerned about warning me about Specter, but he couldn’t stick around and be useful when I needed him, oh, no. Bastard. I hadn’t liked him before. Now I started to hate him.
I followed Amanda out into the living room, chewing my lip. She dropped down on the couch. Her eyes had misted over with red. I looked at her, surprised at first, then felt like an idiot. Of course she was upset. She only saw Sebastian for a second but in his shape, one second was enough to give anyone nightmares.
I stared at the floor while she watched her hands. I really wanted to say something that would make her feel better. Couldn’t think of anything.
Amanda shook her head. “That was awful. That’s all I keep coming back to, when I try to say anything. That’s just awful.” She opened her mouth to keep talking, shut it again. I knew what was going through her head. It had been going through mine for the past several days.
I’m so out of my league.
“I’m sorry,” I said, shoulders hunched.
She looked at me. “Sorry?”
I hunched my shoulders a little more. “For getting you into this . . . for turning you without asking. For everything.”
She shook her head. “I’m fine. You don’t need to apologize.”
“Amanda . . . Are you sure you don’t want to talk? At all? I mean, you died the –”
“I know what happened, Jen!” she said, so sharply that I jumped. She looked away while I stared at her.
“Let’s talk about this later,” she said in a tired voice. “Please.”
“All right,” I said, more worried now.
She stared down the hall, shifting uneasily.
I watched her for a minute, then sighed. “Hungry?”
She gave me a look, part disgust and part relief. “Starving. But after that . . .” she waved a hand towards Sebastian’s room.
I sat down beside her. “You still need to eat. If you really don’t want to I understand, but you should try.”
She nodded, looking at her hands. “I guess.”
I put my wrist to my mouth, finding the little daggers there and slashing myself open with them.
Something in the bedroom crashed. We both jumped. I wanted to get up and see what had happened, and I wanted to sit right here and not find out.
When no more noise came, I decided to assume everything was all right. Not that I could offer a lot of help anyway. I’d retch my guts out before Josephine could pull one bullet out. I would do the most good staying the hell out of the way.
I let out a breath
I didn’t know I’d taken. Amanda did the same.
“Here,” I said, to distract both of us. I held my wrist out for her. She took it awkwardly, but put it to her mouth quickly. The sensuality that came with her drinking still startled me. Less so than it had last night. Easier to ignore. Partly because I knew what was coming when she put her mouth to my wrist and partly because I was worried about other things.
Another crash came from the room while she fed. She jumped and choked on the blood a little, coughing and clutching my wrist. I noticed that once she cleared her throat, Amanda continued breathing. Had I done that? Kept breathing after my body didn’t need it anymore, out of some sort of habit? I knew I breathed when I was stressed, but other than that, I couldn’t remember. I gave her back my wrist.
She finished quicker and easier this time than the night before. She let my wrist go with a mumbled thanks, avoiding my eyes.
I rolled my sleeve back down and wondered what to do next. We had half the night to fill. My feeding had been a lot quicker than it had seemed, and the whole episode with getting Sebastian home had taken just over an hour.
How can things like that happen so fast? One moment everything’s fine, and in less than five minutes your whole life is different.
“So . . . vampires heal, huh?” Amanda asked, searching for a conversation piece. “Like in movies or books or something. He’ll be the same as ever tomorrow night?”
I nodded, remembering my own battered body. No scars, no sore spots. As if it never happened.
“That wouldn’t have killed him, would it?” Amanda asked.
I hesitated, then shook my head. “I don’t know.”
She bit her lip. “What would happen to us? If Sebastian did get killed?”
We’d be so screwed, I thought instantly. Didn’t say that out loud. But I didn’t know what to say. As I tried to think of something positive, I saw Amanda’s face. She knew what my pause meant.
“Maybe we should run,” she said.
“They’d just find us again.” I didn’t want to tell her that. But it was true.
She pulled her knees to her chest and didn’t blink. I realized she was trying not to have the same little freak-out session she’d had earlier. My gut twisted.
“Amanda?” I said. “Hey. We’re gonna be okay. Sebastian’s here. He’s taking care of us. He’s gonna help us.”
If she heard me, she didn’t act like it. My eyebrows puckered as I watched her, wishing I could help. Knowing I couldn’t.
After what felt like an hour but was probably only a few minutes, she sort of came back from wherever she’d gone. She swallowed once and looked away from me.
I watched her a while, then sighed and ran a hand through my hair.
Oh, Kent . . .
“What?” he would say, if he were here, if he could. All guilty, as if I’d caught him trying to sneak Gypsy out to a gig in a guitar case. No matter how I ever said his name – angry, happy, exasperated, overjoyed – he would look up like that and say, “What?”
I wished it was still funny.
I kept an eye on Amanda, then sighed again. It came out louder this time, more echo-y. I certainly hadn’t sighed all that loud. I went as still as I could and listened.
The apartment had gone quiet. No crashes or bangs or long breaths – besides mine. Was everything okay?
Now you know you’re paranoid, I told myself. Everything’s fine. Josephine’s done with Sebastian, that’s all.
Sebastian would probably want to rest the remainder of the night – I couldn’t imagine him walking around with those kinds of injuries. Hell, he couldn’t with his leg like that. All shredded, strings of bloody meat hanging down from the rip in his jeans, mingling with the threads. The image wouldn’t get out of my head, leaving a heavy lump in my throat that I couldn’t swallow. How did it feel to get shot like that?
Had Kent known?
I wouldn’t have known to ask him. He wouldn’t have had any scars, no achy spots, no missing fingers. Almost all our injuries healed up in one day’s sleep. I couldn’t decide if I found that relieving or disturbing.
Did that explain why Kent’s face got so long sometimes? Stuff he didn’t want to talk about, stuff that really hurt him? The thought that followed made me wince. If Alec had told the truth about Kent’s past, that long face might have meant two different things. Kent thinking about torments he’d suffered – or thinking about torments he’d caused.
Another sound from the hall surprised me out of my thoughts. A soft thump, like a single footstep. It came again. It sounded like someone limping – but Sebastian couldn’t possibly be up on his feet.
Right?
In defiance of my assumption, his tousled blond head appeared in the doorway. He leaned heavily on a long staff, limping. Thick white bandages crisscrossed his body, and he’d somehow gotten into a pair of his loose pajama-pants. I guessed Josephine had more to do with that than him. He limped out to the living room, stopping beside me.
“You have nothing else to do this evening?” he asked casually. That had to mean he had something in mind.
“No,” I said.
“We should continue your training.”
I glanced at Amanda. She seemed to have come out of her little panic attack, but looked at me with a kind of embarrassed terror. I knew pushing or trying to talk would only upset her more at this point. I shrugged. “Sounds good to me. It’s either that or spend the night stuck inside pacing.” I didn’t ask how he intended to train me one-legged and battered. He would have an answer.
He nodded and turned back toward the hall. I stood, following behind as he limped to the practice room. He moved pretty well, considering – like he’d had to do this before. I didn’t dwell on it. We hobbled to the practice room – or rather, Sebastian hobbled, I walked. In the room, he lowered himself onto a pillow in one corner, setting himself down with the same hiss of effort as earlier. A tiny sound compared to what he must have felt.
Alone with him, I couldn’t stop staring. His face was still marked up where the bullets had hit him. A slash across his cheek, part of one ear missing. Fortunately, it didn’t look like Specter had aimed for his head. Much.
“Are you all right?” he asked, making me realize I should be asking him that.
I shifted and kept staring. “Yeah, I’m okay. I was just wondering the same about you.”
“It will heal,” he said off-handedly.
I shook my head. How much could he take and still keep going? “Never mind,” I said out loud. I didn’t want to know. It would all heal. “What should I do?”
Now he sighed and looked away. Something was coming. I waited quietly for him to compose his thoughts, examining his scarred face with morbid curiosity. Josephine had cleaned him up pretty well. No more red smeared all over him, just clean dark holes. He had to be really hungry.
“I wish to apologize,” he said at last, meeting my eyes with that expressive gaze.
I tried to make a few sounds of protest – Sebastian cut me off.
“I am your protector. That is what you have asked of me, that is what I have agreed to. I left your side to pursue a personal goal. I did not think Specter would have left you alive should he have killed me, yet I went despite this. I apologize.”
“No, you don’t –” I protested, but he held a bandaged hand up.
“I also wish to thank you, for removing me from further danger. I could certainly have accomplished it myself, with a great deal of effort. Your assistance hastened my escape. So you have my thanks.”
Silently, I nodded.
He held my eyes, dark and serious. “I know you heard what Shroud said to me last night. His request.”
I nodded slightly. It hadn’t been a bright moment in my evening, but I hadn’t given it much thought. Sebastian hadn’t listened to the guy, why should I worry?
“I will not give in to Specter’s demand, Ian. I swore to you at the beginning of this that I would not kill you. And I believe that includes handi
ng you over to someone who will.”
Actually hearing that out loud made a little lump appear in my throat. I swallowed. Twice. “Thank you,” I finally got out.
He inclined his head.
With no further ado, he waved his staff at me and ordered me to take stance. And then he started in on me.
BEDROOM
Sebastian woke. Listening intently, he opened his eyes a slit. Josephine lay beside him, one arm across his waist. The lamp he had broken last night lay in pieces beside the bed. He had shattered his mirror, as well. Otherwise the room was in proper order. He rose, sliding from under Josephine’s hand. She flexed her graceful fingers once, but made no sound.
Carefully winding them back as he went, he removed the bandages she had wrapped about him the night before. They had helped hold his torn flesh in place so that he could move without damaging himself further. The bandages had stained red in several places, while his skin had healed perfect and unmarred – except for the one scar across his chest. He had taken the wound while still mortal, could no longer recall where or how –
Josephine trailing her finger along it, asking without asking, how?
Sarah, doing the same thing, “What’s this then, love? It’s an angry mark –”
Sebastian shook off the sudden memory, as vivid as if he had lived it only moments ago. They had started coming to him like that now. Regularly. Vivid, as if he still lived them. He could smell Sarah’s skin, the fire they’d lain beside, feel her gentle finger running along his chest. Coming out of it was almost like dying again.
He waited for the image to fade, wishing it would stay. Knowing of course it wouldn’t. It was only a memory, something his mortal brain had etched into itself centuries ago. A copy of what really happened.
Sebastian left the rolled bandages in his bathroom to wash later and use again. As quietly as he could he dressed and left the bedroom. He would have to feed later, and he meant to begin his hunt on the pack tonight, but for now he needed to think. Think, and hope not to become distracted.
This was the third night since Specter had issued his ultimatum, and Sebastian had barely found time to track his former mentor. Protecting Ian and her new child had taken up too much time; and after Specter’s attempt to remove him from the equation entirely, Sebastian had been in no shape to hunt anyone – let alone the practiced leader of his pack.
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