by Alexa Riley
10
Ren
“What?” I say looking at my parents. They’ve both been staring at me since I came downstairs this morning, and they keep exchanging looks. I know what this is about, but neither of them is saying anything.
When I came home after school, my dad and I talked about him giving Lily a job. I was surprised that he didn’t ask questions, he just agreed. It was a relief, but I knew that would only hold them off for so long. My mom had a long shift yesterday at the hospital, and she’s about to leave in a few minutes. The time is ticking, and she knows her window to talk to me is closing.
“So, Ren, your dad was telling me you have a girlfriend.”
There it is.
“Yeah,” I say, finishing my breakfast and taking my plate to the kitchen.
Suddenly my mom is grabbing me by the arm and pushing me up against the counter. It’s playful, but I’m amazed at how strong she is for a woman so small. She’s bigger than Lily, but not by much.
“You listen to me, Ren Hendricks. I’ve never seen you so much as blink in the direction of a girl before, so you can’t show up and say you’ve got a girlfriend and not give me details.” She pokes me in the stomach, and it makes me laugh. “Spill it, Sweet Potato, or I’m gonna pull out the big guns.”
I can’t help but laugh at the nickname she gave me when I was a baby. She said I came out all orange and squishy like a sweet potato. She lifts up her hands and makes claws like she’s going to tickle me, and I get serious. If there’s one thing she knows I hate, it’s to be tickled. Some people find it funny and enjoy the sensation. They laugh and think it’s playful. Not me. When I get tickled, I get mad, and she knows it.
“Mom,” I warn and try to push myself away from her.
“Spill. It,” she says, raising an eyebrow and daring me to test her.
Letting out a sigh, I give in. I know it’s useless when she’s like this. I look over her head to my dad, who props up against the counter, sipping his coffee and waiting. They’re both in this together.
“Her name is Lily. We, um, met yesterday.” I see the shock on her face, but she doesn’t stop me. “She’s new to the school, but we had the same classes yesterday and I gave her a ride home.”
“Oh.” My mom’s hands drop, and she looks like she’s thinking over what I’m saying. “So she’s your girlfriend?” Her tone is confused, but she doesn’t push it.
“Mom.” I put my hands on her arms, and she looks up at me, our eyes locking. “She’s more than just my girlfriend. I know it sounds crazy, but you guys told me you knew the instant you saw one another in fourth grade that you were done. It’s that way with Lily. She just needs to see it, too.”
“But, Ren—”
“Trust me,” I say, cutting her off. “I’ll bring her around as soon as I can convince her. But believe me, Mom, she’s the one.”
She looks in my eyes as if she’s searching for something. After a second she seems to find what she’s looking for and smiles at me. “You’ve always marched to beat of your own drum, and I know you do things in your own time and your own way. I trust you.”
She gives me a kiss on the cheek as she grabs her bag and tells my dad goodbye. Dad smiles at me and takes his thermos of coffee and leaves for work, too. I stand there for a second, thinking about what I’ve told them and their reaction. I feel a smile pull at my lips as I consider what could have happened versus what did. I’ll take it. Despite knowing her for less than a day, Lily means more to me than I could have thought possible. But I’d rather feel obsessively consumed than feel nothing at all.
I stayed up late last night, lying in bed and running the whole day back through my mind, thinking about her every movement, every time I touched her, and ached to see her again.
I grab my bag, go outside, and get in my Jeep. I head towards Lily’s house. I leave early thinking maybe I could go in and meet her parents or something first. So they know she’s not riding with someone crazy and that I’ll take care of her. I’d also like for them to meet me because she’s going to be spending a lot of time with me. Right before I get to her house, I see she’s already walking down the sidewalk. Anger flashes through me as I see her out in the cold. I stop, pull over, and jump out.
“Hey,” I say, stepping in front of her. She looks up at me startled, as if she’s surprised to see me. “Were you trying to ditch me?”
“No, I just thought maybe you might forget.” She glances towards the ground, and I step in front of her, putting my hand under her chin.
“I’d never forget you, Lily. Ever.” I see something close to tears pool in her eyes, and I pull her into my arms. “You okay, babe?” She nods against me, but I can’t help but think something is wrong. “Hey, let’s get you in the Jeep and warm you up. I bet you didn’t have breakfast, did you?”
I take her hand and open her door, lifting her up inside. I reach down to the floorboard and put a bag in her lap. It’s still warm.
“My mom makes the best chocolate chip muffins and I thought you might want one. Or three.”
I wink at her and she lights up, looking down at the bag. I close the door and walk around to my side, and by the time I get in, the smell of warm chocolate fills the cab.
“This has made my day,” Lily says and takes a bite.
I watch her, and seeing the light come back in her eyes as she smiles at me makes my whole year. She has a smudge of chocolate on the side of her mouth, and I can’t stand it anymore.
Leaning forward, I place my hand on the side of her face and cup her cheek. She looks a little startled, but not scared. “I’m gonna kiss you, Lily Parker. Because you’re the sweetest and most beautiful girl I’ve ever met, and if I don’t I might die. But once I do, you’re gonna belong to me.”
She licks her lips and looks down at mine. When her bright blue doe eyes flicker, there’s only desire burning in them.
Placing my mouth softly on hers, I feel the silk of lips against mine. They’re full and sweet, and when she parts her mouth, I slip my tongue inside. She tastes of mint and chocolate, and I want to consume her. But this is only our first kiss, the first of many, and I aim to go slow with her.
It’s not nearly long enough, but I pull back a little, resting my forehead against hers, and breathe in her scent. She smells like Christmas and home all rolled into one. Excitement, comfort, and an overwhelming sense of right settle in my chest.
I’ve waited my whole life for her.
11
Lily
I’m the one who starts the kiss this time, wanting to feel his lips on me again. The whole world melted away when he kissed me, and I want to do it over and over again. Like yesterday in the cafeteria, he shields us with this little bubble, and I never want to leave it. I didn’t have a care in the world in that moment, and I don’t have one now. I’m just a normal teenage girl having her first kiss with a boy. Though I’m not sure you could call Ren a boy.
I wanted him to show up so bad this morning, but I was scared about what would happen if he didn’t. Not wanting to have to face it, I decided to walk. It was silly and stupid and made no sense, but I was scared. For no reason. He came, and I have a feeling he will always come for me.
This time I push forward, deepening the kiss. His lips part, and I try to replicate the same soft touch of tongue he gave me. A sound leaves his throat, or maybe it’s me who makes the sound. I try to move in closer, wanting no space between us. He wraps his arms around me, his hands going to my back.
I jerk from the pain that shoots through my body, but I’m unable to move with Ren’s arms wrapped around me. My eyes meet his and his face fills with concern.
“Sorry,” I mumble, hoping he doesn’t ask. But the hope is short-lived.
“Turn around,” he commands.
“It’s nothing. I just fell and hit a table.” I didn’t look at the bruise this morning, so I have no idea how bad it is. I could feel it, but I couldn’t bear to look at it. I didn’t need a reminder of what happened l
ast night. I’d rather forget about it and try to pretend it never happened.
“Turn around, babe.” He says it softer this time, and I give in. I turn slowly in my seat, bending forward a little as he pushes my coat and shirt up to reveal my lower back.
“Fuck,” I hear him mutter. His big hand softly lingers over the bruise, then I feel his lips. The touch so soft and sweet it makes me want to cry. Who knew a giant of a man could be so gentle?
“Does it hurt, babe?” he asks, making my heart jump in my chest. Every time he calls me babe, it warms me from the inside out.
“No, it’s fine.” He rights my shirt and coat, and I move back to face him. I can see concern written all over his face. “I’m fine, really,” I try to reassure him. It’s nice having someone worry over you. Even about something as little as a bruise.
He leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to my lips. “Let me know if it starts bothering you.”
I nod at him and give him a smile. I can tell the bruise put him on edge, and I’m glad he doesn’t ask for more details about it.
He pulls his Jeep from the curb, heading in the direction of the school. Snow is coming down pretty hard, and I’m glad I don’t have to walk. I can’t stop myself from stealing glances over at him while he drives us. I take little bites of the muffins he brought me, enjoying the sweet treat first thing.
When he catches me, I blush, and he gives me a big smile that goes all the way to his eyes. God, he’s so handsome. He takes my breath away. I wonder if our kiss was his first, too, but shyness gets the best of me and I can’t bring myself to ask. It probably wasn’t. Not with the way some of the girls at school look at him. And he’s the star of the football team. I’d rather not know about any of his other kisses.
“Don’t move,” he tells me when we pull into the school parking lot. He grabs my backpack and hops out, then comes around to my side of the Jeep. He opens the door for me and helps me down, and I reach for my backpack. He shakes his head and gives me one of his beautiful smiles again. “I got it, babe. Besides, your back hurts.”
The backpack wasn’t hurting my back, but I know he isn’t going to give it to me. He takes my hand in his after he shuts the Jeep door and we make our way into the school. I notice people turn to look at us. A few say hi to Ren. He gives them a chin nod, not speaking to them. It’s clear he’s popular, but I’m not sure he likes that much.
When we get to his locker I glance around and see more people are looking at us. I’m not sure if they’re looking at me or him. I’m not paying attention as Ren starts to unzip my coat, taking it off of me, then removing my hat and gloves. He shoves them into his locker before taking off his own and putting it in.
“Mythology?” he asks as he shuts the locker, and it takes me a minute to get what he’s talking about.
“Yeah, you have it, too?” I look up at him, hoping he does.
“Maybe.” He grabs my hand again, leading me down the hallway.
Maybe we have the same class? How does he not know what classes he has? We walk by Kristen and Carrie, who are giggling, but they quieten as we pass. Kristen’s eyes narrow on me before she gives me a disappointed head shake. I don’t know what she means by that. Ren doesn’t so much as glance her way as we pass them. He doesn't really look at anyone besides me. People move out of his way as he walks down the center of the hall, but he doesn’t seem to notice.
He walks me into the classroom, and I pick a seat towards the back of the room. He drops my backpack next to my chair as I take a seat. He places both hands on my desk, leaning down over me, blocking anyone from seeing me, and filling up all the space in front of me.
“Don’t leave without me. If I’m not back in the classroom before the bell rings, wait for me.”
I nod at him. Something about his overprotectiveness stirs something deep inside me.
“Say it, babe,” he says, raising an eyebrow.
“I’ll wait for you.”
He leans in, placing another quick kiss on me, and I watch him stride from the room, determination in his steps. I sit there still feeling the sweetness of his lips on me long after the teacher starts the lesson.
12
Ren
I spend the better part of my morning rearranging my schedule in the guidance office. Some might say it’s crazy to move all my classes around so that Lily and I have a mirrored schedule. I don’t care what those people think. I am crazy. Besides, it doesn’t even matter what classes I take. I’ve already gotten into college.
Our kisses this morning were enough to send me over the edge of sanity and now I’m in full-on insane mode. I never felt like I was living my life before she walked into it, and now suddenly she’s here, and I can’t picture a moment without her. She’s quickly becoming the center of my world, and I’m okay with that. I’ve never been obsessed about anything before. Not winning in football or getting the best grades. Not beating some dumb video game or working on my Jeep. But since my eyes landed on Lily, she’s consumed my every thought. I didn’t see her coming, but I’ve never been happier to have been blindsided.
“Okay, Ren. You should be all set.” The counselor looks over his notes and back to my schedule. “You’ve more than met all your prerequisites, and your transcripts are well above marks for your scholarship. I see no need to change your schedule this late in the year, but honestly these are all bonus classes for you as they are. Your attendance will still be counted, but I don’t see the teachers here giving you any grief about it.”
I nod, looking over my new classes for today, and smile. Mythology, civics, lunch, and then art. We both have free periods at the end of every day, so that gives us more time to be together. “Thanks Mr. Green.”
“No problem. But can I ask why the sudden change?” He watches me as I stand and grab my bag.
“I’m broadening my horizons.” I don’t wait for more questions as I turn and leave, eager to meet Lily after her first class.
The bell sounds as I get to the door, and I look in and see her stay in her seat as everyone else stands up and grabs their bags. I walk past the crowd and she spots me, smiling so big I see dimples in her cheeks. It takes my breath away. She’s truly beautiful.
I grab her bag and take her hand, leading her from the classroom and down the hall. “We’ve got civics before lunch, with art after that.”
“So you do have the same schedule as me?” Lily beams, and I’m glad I made the change.
“I only had to shuffle a couple of things around, but this last semester is cake. I’d rather spend the time with you.”
Her cheeks redden and she ducks her chin. “That’s really sweet of you. Thanks.”
“Don’t thank me.” I squeeze her hand and she looks over at me. “Just don’t try and get away.” I wink at her and she elbows me. It’s playful and fun, and I can’t remember the last time someone made me feel special. I’m warm and gooey inside, and I feel like one of those cartoons with the heart eyes. God, I must look like a fool following her around like a puppy dog. But I’d rather be her puppy than nothing at all. If being by her side as a loyal partner is a crime, then lock me up.
We sit beside each other in civics, and I find a few chances to reach out and touch her. Something about making sure she’s real. When I touch her, she smiles at me and lights up. It’s like she’s never been touched before, and she leans into it, craving the attention. When class is over, we walk hand in hand to lunch, and much like the day before she sits while I bring back trays of food. Only this time we aren’t interrupted and we get to finish a brownie together.
“You like sweets?” she asks me, and I smile back.
“Almost as much as I like you.” I wink at her, and she nudges me with her elbow again. I’m starting to think she likes touching me, too. “Seriously. Sugar is like crack to me. Give me a cake and I’ll marry you.”
Her face flushes red.
“It’s too bad you missed my birthday. You could have made me one,” I tease.
“When was
it?”
“Thanksgiving. My mom jokes that I like to eat so much that I was born on a day dedicated to it. When’s yours?”
“Umm.” She looks away and then looks back at me. “Friday.”
“As in this Friday?” Excitement builds in my chest.
She nods and shrugs. “It’s not a big deal. Just finally eighteen.”
“Hey.” I take her chin in my hand and make her look at me. “It’s a huge deal. We’ll celebrate. Okay? I’ll take you for cake. I know a great place.”
Her face lights up and she nods. The little cloud that formed has passed, and I vow to do that for the rest of our lives. To push away her clouds and make sure she’s only seeing sunshine.
We finish lunch and walk to art class together, and I can see the change in Lily once we get there. There’s a look of excitement in her eyes as the teacher talks about what we’ll be working on today. She asks us to do a charcoal sketch of the statue in front of us, and I set up my easel next to Lily. She beams over at me as she takes the dark stick and begins to draw right away. I’m not really that good at art, but I try as best as I can and do a pretty decent job. The statue is of a woman wrapped in a cloak, so the curves and shading are difficult. I’m sure if I’d taken art any time during my four years of high school I’d understand what I was doing. As it is, this is my first time, but I muddle through.
I glance over at Lily a few times, but she’s deep in concentration. I love to watch her face as she draws and see the focus she puts into her work.
By the time the hour is up, the teacher calls for us to stop and examines what we’ve done. I can’t see Lily’s from where I’m sitting, but I see the teacher come up behind her and her eyes spark.