Vampire Dating Agency

by Rosette Bolter

  And then, ever so slightly, a prickle.

  A couple of goosebumps standing on her ankle.

  A shadow loomed through the archway.

  “Ah, Madame Nightshade. It’s good to see you.”

  A woman in a silky purple and black dress and long white hair emerged into the room slowly.

  “I’m told a spy made it on to your bus,” Madame Nightshade said quietly.

  “Ye-yes,” the guard stammered. “But she was apprehended.”

  “Let’s hope so.”

  The woman pressed passed him and set her gaze across the line.

  “Well, I don’t see too many new faces,” she remarked. “I don’t have remind any of you what happens if you’re found to be working for the other side.”

  Haley remained completely still as the Madame’s gaze swept in her direction.

  “I assure you, Madame,” the guard said earnestly, “the situation has been dealt with.”

  Madame’s gaze shifted back to him.

  “You have another group to collect?”

  “Two more tonight, Madame,” the guard answered.

  “Then I’ve kept you long enough,” she said. “Only … if I find out you let any more spies onto your bus tonight, I shan’t be so –”

  “I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

  Silence filled the air.

  “Dismissed,” Madame Nightshade whispered.

  The guard walked back out to the entrance.

  Another pause.

  The Vampiress was looking at the floor.

  “Well then ladies, you know your way around. To arrange a new meeting see Evelyn in the refreshment chamber. Games and activities begin at eight o’clock in the second floor auditorium. Enjoy yourself. Relax. And hopefully … be guided to your heart’s desire…”

  She smiled at them.

  “That is all.”

  The line began to disperse.

  Haley looked anxiously towards Melanie.

  “Uh… Madame Nightshade?” Melanie called.

  The Madame walked over to them.

  “My friend here is brand spanking new. You may have missed her.”

  “Indeed I must have,” the Madame said taking Haley’s hand. She clasped it between hers and felt her pulse beating in her wrist. “My Goodness. How I must frighten you.”

  Haley’s jaw dropped. She didn’t know what to say.

  “Hush, hush, hush,” Madame Nightshade said touching her face. “You’re in good hands now. We’ll look after you.”

  “I said you’d give her a bit of a tutorial,” Melanie offered. “Unless you want me to help out with that.”

  “What is your name again?” Madame Nightshade said looking at her sideways.

  “Melanie Maykis.”

  “It would be most helpful to…”

  “Haley,” Melanie filled in the blank.

  “To Haley if you were to show her around,” Madame Nightshade beamed. “But of course I will have to go through the introductory process with her myself. Do you mind waiting for us? In the Refreshment Chamber perhaps?”

  “Of course,” Melanie murmured.

  “Good, good, good.”

  Madame Nightshade let go of Haley’s wrist.

  “Come with me, darling.”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  There was no word for them. No word to describe what they were.

  All around her, shadows of pointy black ears danced in the glowing red light. Twisted black claws gripped the bars outside the cages, silver teeth shimmering. Green eyes blinking.

  Although she’d heard them growling and howling several meters away down the corridor, as soon as Madame Nightshade entered the commotion in the room ceased. Haley stepped through the open doorway, her eyes darting around, unsure if she was safe. The cages were stacked upon one another, covering the room’s circumference and reaching almost as high as the roof.

  “Do have a seat,” Madame Nightshade said, closing the door.

  Haley stepped onto the blue carpet where two cushioned cylinders stood facing one another. She sat down on the nearest one, her knees trembling together. Madame Nightshade walked past her to retrieve something from the side of the room.

  “Is – is it safe in here?” Haley stammered.

  Madame Nightshade took the seat opposite. She rested a computer tablet on her lap.

  “As long as I’m with you, you’re safe,” she assured her. “Although they are rather hungry. Perhaps you could let one nibble on your finger for a bit?”

  “My finger?”

  “Only joking. Can I have your name again, dear?”

  “Haley Watkins.”

  Madame Nightshade’s fingers glided across the screen.

  Haley leaned forward.

  “It says here you’re a virgin, is that correct?”

  Haley blushed. “It says what?”

  “That you’re a virgin. Did you make it up? Trying to get your approval faster?”

  “Uh – uh…”

  She touched her ear lightly.

  Her friends seemed to have gone silent for the time being.

  “Well?”

  “It’s … that’s correct.”

  “Are you sure?”

  Haley nodded.

  “Who was your last boyfriend?”

  Haley’s lips twisted. “Boyfriend? Oh, I don’t know.”

  “Have you ever had a boyfriend?”

  “Of course I have!”

  “So – who was the last one?”

  Haley took a deep breath. “This is very personal.”

  “Answer her question, Haley,” Maurice piped up.

  She inwardly glared.

  “I’m merely trying to facilitate the most comfortable path to your dating experience,” Madame Nightshade explained.

  “I know,” Haley mumbled. “My … last boyfriend was … about a year ago. Maybe a bit more.”

  “How long were you together?”

  “Seven months.”

  “And you didn’t sleep with him?”

  “No.”

  “Nor with anyone else.”

  “No…”

  “Are you sure you want to be doing this?”

  Haley sat up. “Pardon?”

  “Are you sure that … a vampire is your preference for dating?”

  “That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”

  “How did you reach that decision then?”

  “How did I…?”

  “How did you decide you want to be with a vampire?”

  Haley looked away a moment. “Something … spoke to me.”

  “Such as?”

  “It was just a feeling I had,” she adlibbed. “I wanted … something more than what was out there. You know? Something where I had no idea what to expect.”

  The light flickered between them.

  “I know exactly what you mean,” Madame Nightshade said. “I just hope you’re ready for what’s coming.”

  “I hope so too.”

  “So would I be right to say you’re looking for your perfect match then? Someone who is going to commit to you long term?”

  “As opposed to what?”

  “Well. I can set you up with some people to meet tonight. I can show you photos. Describe their personalities. What they’re searching for in a partner. That’s the conservative route.”

  “Like fixing me up?”

  “Yes. I mean you’re obviously not going to be interested in the more explicit activities we have on offer. You just want to meet them right? See where you go from there?”

  “I suppose so.”

  “There is another way we can do it though. We have a special room upstairs where anyone can walk in and mingle with one another. That way you can see if anyone clicks with you face to face.”

  “That sounds…”

  “It’s more guaranteed to find you a suitable partner. These computers can only account for so much.”

  “But … it’s a little nerving?”

  “The proce
ss exposes you to anyone who is in that room. So it might attract unwanted attention.”

  “But don’t I have protection here?”

  “Yes. And no. If someone wants to hurt you, there’s always a way.”

  “Are you trying to warn me?”

  “No dear, the decision is yours.”

  Haley swallowed. She touched her lower lip.

  “Haley,” Maurice’s voice stirred. “Go and meet them.”

  Madame Nightshade watched her closely.

  “Haley…”

  “I guess we’ll try it then,” she said softly.

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  I was there in that moment. Conscious and alive. Present and nearby. I wasn’t aware that the moment would be reflected on. I was too busy caught up with my current distraction to notice.

  She told me she was a princess. By name … by blood… I wasn’t sure exactly how she wanted me to take it. I could tell she’d been in the company of vampires before, establishing her boundaries early. No biting. No kissing. No touching. Until she was sure I was hers.

  Of course I’d never be hers. I’d never belong to anyone.

  Her defense, while an elaborate parade, would eventually quiet down after hours. She was wearing sunglasses and wouldn’t take them off, which kept me from being able to pierce her mind instantly. She had a small cross hidden beneath her chest, and I could smell a faint touch of garlic coming from her handbag. Experienced, was she. Cautious and wise.

  But of course, it wouldn’t matter later. She hadn’t been picked out by one of the rich and gentlemanly vampire types – she’d been selected by me for an entirely different purpose.

  In truth, while her high status and cautious nerve did attract me initially, I could all too easily see I was going to get bored with her.

  And it was by that very token to which she owed her life.

  “It’s like we can’t even relate to each other anymore,” she was saying. “That deep connection, or wavelength, or whatever bond you share with your closest friends and family – it’s all just make believe. In the air. I was having lunch for instance with my friend Bree the other day and – we’d been friends for seven years mind you – and she was talking about her life and her boyfriend and their problems, and I just realized – I don’t know this woman. I don’t know what she’s thinking. She certainly doesn’t know what I’m thinking. And yet there’s been no one I’ve been closer to. It just makes you realize that however much we think we connect with someone … it’s all in our mind. It’s just to hide how alone we truly are. Do you … ever feel that way?”

  No.

  No, I didn’t understand what she was getting at.

  It may have been how she worded it. Or perhaps I wasn’t listening.

  “Would you excuse me?” I asked, getting up from the table.

  “Oh sure,” she said eagerly. “I should – you know, I have someone I want to call and –”

  “Meet you back here then? Ten minutes?”

  She stood up with a thin smile, as though she could read me. As though she owned me.

  “See you soon,” she said, her eyes sparkling.

  I nodded, and she left the terrace at her end, while I left via mine.

  I didn’t need to go to the bathroom, though I may have implied that was my excuse. I just had to … break away …

  I realized in comparison to the last few women I killed that I particularly disliked my wonderful ‘Princess’ and dislike could be an excellent tool in finding one’s motivation for these things.

  Of course, I didn’t need to get space to realize that much. There was something else … something in the air tonight … I could feel it …

  It wasn’t ordinary…

  Music.

  Ah, yes.

  Nothing like the somber space-age atmosphere converted into sound.

  Beats, tunes, tempo. My senses were drawn elsewhere.

  I walked through a heavy archway and realized I was approaching the Introductions Room below me. I leant over the bannister and saw the faces of many I recognized – some lambs, some tigers, some … birds of another feather.

  I knew it, within myself. I knew what face I was searching for.

  And as beautiful as my Princess was … she didn’t have it.

  I wasn’t compelled to kill her like I was –

  Ah.

  There she is. Look at her. She looks…

  Perfect.

  My Goodness.

  I leered over the bannister’s edge, laughing to myself.

  Her eyes were drifting upward. But she couldn’t see me yet.

  She could not see.

  I walked slowly down the adjacent staircase, watching as other suitors introduced themselves, shaking her hand, beckoning her with tightlipped conversation.

  She laughed.

  She smiled.

  She seemed so deliciously happy.

  I moved into the crowd, amongst my vampire brothers, blending in.

  I took my time. Approaching her slowly.

  The closer I got, the larger she became.

  The fixation, the bloodlust, the willing madness that came with a dose of night time intoxication –

  “Good evening, Madame Nightshade,” I said pleasantly. “What a couple of angels you’ve allowed grace the presence of our insidious lair tonight.”

  “Would you like to meet them?” the Madame replied.

  I bowed my head.

  “Melanie,” the taller girl said pushing her way in to shake my hand.

  “I’m honored.”

  Then I turned my sights on my true target.

  “And what is your name, my enchantress?”

  “Haley,” she answered. “And you are?”

  I told her my name.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

  An electronic ambience hummed throughout Vampire Dating Agency’s manor. Footsteps trotted quietly up and down the carpet, and gloved hands slid along the walls. In one room two vampires, a male and a female, were sitting on the floor staring into a mirror without their reflection. In the room above them, a woman crawled across ground, gobbling up fallen rose petals till she reached the bed where her lover waited. In the dungeon below, a dragon shifter roared in agony as a group of robed figures poked fun at him.

  The night time air and atmosphere breezed through the openings, and merged with all.

  Haley was still in the Introductions Room. She was sitting by herself at a small table, although Melanie would be returning with cocktails soon. She felt exposed, vulnerable and flooded with adrenalin. All around her she could see the monsters. Some looked perfectly normal, handsome even. Others not so much. She’d spied a few ‘higher vampire’ types with shriveled gray and purplish skin, their faces wretched and disfigured. It seemed frightening to think that even they thought they had a chance with her or any of the other young women. No one in their right mind would want to date them. When they looked at you, it was hard not to scream.

  “You’re doing great, Haley,” Maurice’s voice came through in her ear. “Ms. Armistice wanted me to tell you that she’s very proud of you. At the moment no one suspects you, and you’ve successfully infiltrated the agency.”

  “What do I do now?” Haley whispered.

  “We can’t discern whether you’ve met the vampire we’re seeking yet,” Maurice said. “But hopefully he’ll make his presence known to you soon.”

  “His presence known to me?”

  “Yes, we expect at some point some of these vampires will attempt to court you. Hopefully it isn’t too many. But you look just right to draw our killer out.”

  Haley took a deep breath. Her fingers moved to her wrist, checking her pulse.

  “How are you doing?” Jason asked. “Do you still think you’re up to it?”

  Haley covered her mouth. “I don’t know.”

  “Thanks for that,” Maurice could be heard to say. “What she really needs…”

  “It’s important she understands what she’s getting herself int
o. You can’t expect –”

  Jason’s transmission was cut short.

  Nausea crept through Haley’s lungs.

  “What are you mumbling about all the way out here?” Madame Nightshade asked, appearing out of nowhere.

  Haley’s eyes darted about nervously, as she made way for the vampiress to join her table.

  “So … what did you think?”

  “Think?” Haley stammered. “About what?”

  “About our selection of gentleman, of course.”

  “Oh,” Haley gushed. “Well –”

  “Don’t worry you won’t be set up with one of the purple kind,” Madame Nightshade assured her. “It’s rare for humans to be attracted to them.”

  “Yes … some … people left me unsettled…”

  “So? Was there any that you liked?”

  Haley wiped her fringe from her eyes. “Maybe. I guess.” She hesitated. “What happens next?”

  “You can hear them, speaking amongst themselves,” Madame Nightshade murmured. “If you listen hard enough, you’ll be able to hear them talking about you…”

  Haley’s gaze drifted out into the room in front of them. The voices were muffled, indirect. Inaudible. It seemed much more likely that they had been distracted elsewhere by now. That they’d forgotten about her. Even with the vampiress sitting next to her, they were locked away, in the shadows, out of reach…

  “Haley. I want Haley.”

  Her ears pricked up. She thought she heard her name. But no … no, she couldn’t have. They wouldn’t be talking about her, as though she was anything. That she’d left a mark. That was really just –

  “Haley.”

  She turned to the right.

  Melanie was standing over her.

  “Come on, take it,” she said motioning to the drink in her outstretched hand.

  Haley took the cocktail.

  Melanie sat beside Madame Nightshade. “Any developments?”

  “Someone is about to come forth,” Madame Nightshade answered.

  “For whom?” Melanie replied, sipping her cocktail. “For Haley?”

  “Oh yes, for Haley.”

  “What about me?”

  “We will find someone for you, don’t worry,” the Madame assured her.