Shadow's Surrender: Insurgents Motorcycle Club (Insurgents MC Romance Book 14)

by Chiah Wilder

  “You just do what Doc says,” Helm said. “I called some of the brothers and we’ll put a new door in. You better have your woman stay with you at the clubhouse until we get her place cleaned up.”

  “Yeah,” Shadow muttered. What the fuck am I going to do with Scarlett? I need to talk to her dad. What a fuckin’ mess.

  And in the middle of it was the two of them.

  The problem was—Shadow didn’t know if their love was enough to pull them through this chaos.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  It was the pain that woke him—that and the chirping birds. Shadow opened his eyes and saw the first beams of sunlight piercing through the blinds. He pushed up with his right hand and sat on the edge of the bed, blinking and wiping the sleep from the corners of his eyes. Spotting the bottle of water on the nightstand, Shadow grabbed it and took a long drink. The events of the last week played in his mind, as they always did when he was awake.

  Pamela Mansfield, charged with two counts of first-degree murder and a slew of other charges, sat in a jail cell. The police department determined Shadow had acted in self-defense, thus declining to charge him with assault. The Pinewood Springs Tribune ran a front-page story on the cold case murder, and the scandal was a major topic of discussion at the Pinewood Country Club.

  Since his mother’s death, Shadow had been so convinced it was the rich man in his mom’s life who had murdered her that he’d never once entertained the possibility that a scorned woman could have been responsible for committing such a heinous act.

  And that woman was Scarlett’s mother.

  Scarlett. Fuck. Shadow knew that she was in a world of hurt, and he wasn’t helping by distancing himself from her, but he needed to make sense of everything that had happened before they could go back to where they were. Maybe we never can. Maybe everything is too damn broken. He scrubbed his face with his hand then rose to his feet and headed to the bathroom.

  An hour later, Shadow sat in front of the wrought-iron gates at Scarlett’s parents’ house. When she’d texted him the day before, Scarlett had told him she was staying with her father for a while. He hadn’t seen her since the day after the revelation when he’d told Scarlett what had happened. The extent of their relationship after that had consisted of texts and a few phone calls. Scarlett had told him she wanted to give him the space and time he needed, but Shadow knew his distance was breaking her heart—he heard it in her voice.

  He picked up his cell and opened the photo app, then scrolled down to a bunch of pictures that captured every aspect of Scarlett: sexy, silly, and happy, as well as few of them together. Shadow stared at the photos for a long time before tapping in her number. On the second ring, Scarlett picked up.

  “How are you?” she asked.

  “All right.”

  “How’s your wrist doing?”

  “It’s getting better. I hate having to drive a cage, but it’s only for a few more weeks.” He picked up the thermos of coffee and took a sip.

  “That’s not too bad, but it probably seems like years to you. I know how much you love riding.”

  There was an exaggerated cheerfulness in her voice, and it was obvious she was trying way too damn hard to act like everything was normal when it just wasn’t.

  “How are you doing?” he asked.

  “Taking it day by day.” A small sigh. “Are we ever going to see each other again?” Her words were laced with apprehension.

  Sucking in a deep breath, Shadow slowly let it out. “I’m in front of your gate.”

  “You are?” Her tone was guarded but happy.

  “Yeah.”

  “Do you want me to open it?”

  “Not really.”

  “Oh. Then what?” The anxiety and fear had crept back in.

  “Nothing. I’m just here, that’s all.”

  A second of quiet.

  “I really miss you … us. I know everything has been thrown off kilter. I can’t even make sense of it, so I can only imagine how devastating and surreal this is for you.” The slight hitch in her voice made his chest tighten. “But I want to see you.” Another pause. “Don’t you want to see me too?” she whispered.

  Want to see her? Hell, he wanted to hold her in his arms again, have his mouth on hers, tell her he loved her, then apologize for his coldness—but Shadow didn’t respond.

  A few sniffles. “I better get going.”

  “Is your dad there?”

  “Yes. He really wants to talk to you.”

  “I have nothing to say to him.” Shadow reached over to the glove box and pulled out a baggie. He took out a rolling paper, filled it with weed, and shaped the joint with his fingers as the phone sat in the console on the speaker.

  “I wish you would,” she said tentatively.

  After rolling the joint, he put it between his lips, and lit the end. He inhaled deeply and blew out a plume of smoke.

  “I bet the marijuana helps with your pain.”

  “And a lot of other things.” Another inhalation.

  The sound of Scarlett clearing her throat rasped through the phone.

  “My dad told me about everything. He said that … umm … he loved your mom very much.”

  Shadow stubbed out the joint with two fingers, then put it back into the baggie for later.

  “What the fuck do you want me to say to that?” he said, slamming the glove box shut.

  “I just wanted you to know. I guess I shouldn’t have said anything. I’m sorry.”

  “You have nothing to be sorry about. I’ve always said you can say whatever to me.”

  Then Shadow heard the metal gate clang, and he jerked his head up. And there she was: radiant and smiling, golden hair falling past her shoulders, captivating green eyes. Other than a light pink shine glossing her lips, she wore no makeup. A purple sundress hugged all Scarlett’s curves, and her slender arms folded across her chest as she approached the car. His heart raced and his breathing quickened. She’s fuckin’ beautiful.

  Scarlett opened the door and slipped inside, then swiveled toward him, her gaze holding his.

  “I thought it would be easier to talk in person,” she said softly.

  The phone fell from the console and he cursed as he bent down to retrieve it.

  “Are you mad that I’m here?”

  Spiced vanilla swirled around him, waking up his dick and playing havoc with his emotions.

  “No.”

  She lightly caressed his forearm, then leaned over and brushed her fingers over the bandages on his wrist and his arm. Her touch was so damn soft, so perfect.

  “Do you still love me?” she whispered, pulling her hand away.

  “Yeah,” he said quickly.

  “That’s good,” she muttered.

  Shadow tucked her hand in his and squeezed it. “All of this feels like some fuckin’ B-rated movie. I don’t know …”

  “I’m sorry for what my family did to you. I’m in shock over it, really. I can’t believe my mother could do something like that. She’s always been cold and distant, but …” her voice trailed away.

  “This isn’t your fault, and it isn’t mine either. We were just kids put in the middle of our parents’ bullshit.” Shadow pivoted in his seat so that he faced her. “But sometimes … no, a lot of times, I blame myself. If only I could’ve made more money, my mom wouldn’t have had to hook up with a rich man … your dad,” he said.

  “You were a teenager. How much money could you have made? You’ve carried the blame for your mother’s death since it happened. I don’t think she would’ve wanted that. The one to blame is my mother. She murdered yours. I can’t believe it or get past it. My family has caused you so much pain. How can you ever look at me again without thinking about all of this?” She pulled her hand away and looked down.

  For a long minute Shadow watched her, then he reached over and brushed the long, wavy strands of hair over her shoulder. She looked up and a ghost of a smile whispered across her lips.

  “When I look a
t you, I see a beautiful, sexy woman. I don’t see the ugliness of your mother or the lies of your father. This isn’t about you.”

  “Then, why are you pushing away from me?”

  Shadow shook his head while he raised one of his shoulders. “I don’t know.”

  “Do you want us to go our separate ways? It’ll be hard, but being in limbo like this is worse.” She turned her head and looked straight ahead.

  The thought of Scarlett not being a part of his life, of never seeing her again, ripped a hole in his chest. “You’re the only thing that’s grounding me. I’ve just needed some time by myself.”

  “I understand that,” she said, her eyes shimmering. “I just want to know that we’re okay. I can’t stand the thought of you not being in my life.”

  Shadow leaned over and pressed his lips to hers, then broke away. “Baby, you’ve changed my life in ways I never thought anything or anyone could, and I want you on the back of my bike.”

  Scarlett flung her arms around him and pulled him closer. “I want that too.”

  She swept her mouth against his, and he wrapped his arms around her. It felt so good to hold her, to kiss her, to breathe in her scent. Grief and anger had made him lose his head and push her away. He pulled away slightly. “I should’ve reached out to you instead of trying to figure it all on my own,” he said before kissing her again.

  “Just know I’m here for you no matter what,” she whispered across his lips.

  They kissed, touched, and held each other through the constant whirr of lawn mowers from neighboring houses, the screams of children riding bikes up and down the street, and the barks of dogs as their owners walked them on the sidewalks. And they would’ve stayed that way except for the incessant vibration of Shadow’s phone against the dashboard.

  “Hey,” he said.

  “The fuckers are back in town. Banger’s called an emergency church in one hour,” Smokey said. “Are you at the warehouse?”

  “I’m not. I’ll see you in an hour. Thanks for letting me know.” He put the phone in the console.

  “When will I see you again?” Scarlett smoothed the wrinkles from her dress.

  “I may have something to do tonight. I’ll call you, though. How long are you staying with your dad?”

  “I don’t know. He’s awfully shaken up about all of this.”

  Shadow’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah … well.”

  She looked at him quickly, then cut her gaze back to her dress. “Anyway, I could never go back to my condo. I’ve decided to sell it. I’ll stay with my dad for a while.” Scarlett leaned her head against the head-rest. “What a fucking mess this is. I hope my mom does the right thing and pleads guilty. I can’t even imagine how horrible it would be for you to go to the trial.”

  “Yeah—the best would be a plea deal.”

  “I still can’t believe this is all happening. I keep thinking I’m in a dream and that I’ll wake up soon. How the hell could my mom do something as horrible as that?”

  Shadow drew her to him and wrapped his arm around her. “Jealousy and fear are a lethal combination.” He kissed the top of her head. “I’ll call you.”

  “Promise?”

  “Yeah.” He kissed the tip of her nose, then moved away from her.

  Scarlett climbed out of the car, and she was still standing on the sidewalk watching him when he turned the corner.

  Instead of going to the clubhouse right away, Shadow stopped off at the grocery store, bought a bouquet of roses, and then proceeded through the business district as he headed to Mountain Crest Cemetery. It’d been a long time since he’d visited his mother’s grave, but Shadow had the strong urge to go.

  Driving through the entrance, he saw the office and pulled into the lot; he didn’t remember where the location of the gravesite was. Several minutes later, he drove slowly past mausoleums and tombstones until he saw marker 157.

  Shadow grabbed the bouquet and slid out of the car, then walked across the grass until he reached a small rose-colored granite gravestone set flush to the ground. It read Carmen Basson ~ Beloved Mother on top with the dates of her birth and death on the bottom. He knelt on one knee and pulled the weeds away from the border of the stone, then stood up and stared down at it.

  A gentle breeze whistled through the pine trees that dotted the manicured grounds, and wildflowers perfumed the early afternoon air. The wind sounded like ghostly voices calling back and forth through the treetops.

  “Hey, Ma,” he said, his voice low. “I brought you some flowers.”

  Shadow ripped off the plastic wrapper and tissue paper, then stooped down and put the red roses on the grave.

  “You got your justice now.” He brushed his fingers against the cool granite and closed his eyes, letting memories of him and his mother flood through his mind. Then he slowly straightened up. “Fuck … I miss you.” He tapped his hand against his chest. “You’re always in here,” he whispered before turning away and walking back to the car.

  When Shadow arrived at the clubhouse, there was a tense excitement in the air, and he followed the members to the meeting room.

  Banger was at the head of the table with Hawk by his side, and the gavel didn’t hit the wood block until the room grew quiet.

  “The fuckers are back in town,” Banger said.

  “Probably think they’re safe since that bitch got arrested,” Throttle said.

  “They think we’re stupid enough to believe that she was behind the tire iron bullshit,” Rock added.

  “They don’t know the Insurgents,” Bones said.

  “They will now!” Chas shouted and the room exploded with cheers, whistles, and fists on the table.

  A proud smile lit up Banger’s face, and Shadow felt very lucky to be part of the Insurgents brotherhood. He tipped his chair until it back hit the wall and waited for the noise to die down before he spoke.

  “I’m fuckin’ honored to call all of you my brothers. It’s been a tough week, but it would’ve been even harder if I didn’t have the brotherhood.”

  “We got your back, bro,” Helm said as the others voiced their agreement.

  “And I got yours,” Shadow said.

  The gavel hit the block again.

  “Now that you pussies had your fuckin’ Dr. Phil moment, let’s get back to being men,” Banger growled, but there was a twinkle in his eye, and his mouth twitched as though he was fighting a smile.

  “Since we know that the old fucker didn’t murder Shadow’s mom, our plans of doing him in may change,” Hawk said.

  “We should kill him for what he did,” Buffalo said.

  Hawk looked at Shadow. “It’s your call, bro.”

  “The old fucker’s on the verge of losing all his land and money. I’d rather have him alive when that happens,” Shadow said.

  “Serves the old fart right,” Helm said.

  “So a beatdown for his pussy son and his friend, who I found out is Jonah Rollins,” Hawk said.

  “I know that asshole,” Shadow said. “He was the one in Dream House’s parking lot with the hooker a while back. The jerk just hasn’t learned his lesson.”

  “He will tonight.” Axe laughed.

  “I bet it was Warren who threw the iron at me. That Jonah wimp doesn’t have the balls.”

  “It doesn’t matter who did it, they’ll both get the shit kicked outta them,” Rock said.

  “And the old man?” Shadow asked.

  “We’ll rough him up, then destroy his hundred-thousand-dollar car,” Hawk replied.

  The membership cheered and banged their fists on the table, and Hawk reclined against the wall, a huge grin plastered on his face.

  Shadow knew that destroying the jerk’s car would be the best retribution for a superficial asshole on the cusp of filing for bankruptcy.

  “When are we doing this?” Shadow yelled above the noise.

  Banger held out his hands, gesturing the men to quiet down.

  “Some of us will go to the old man’s house and te
ach him a lesson, and the others will straighten out the spoiled fuckers,” Hawk replied. “Which group do you wanna be with?”

  “Kick the spoiled fuckers’ asses,” he answered.

  “Those assholes will be at their club for a party tonight. We’ll stake them out, then follow and let the group that’ll be stationed at each of their houses know they’re on the way. Then we’ll ambush them. It’s pretty simple.” Hawk grabbed the bottle of beer on the table and brought it to his mouth.

  “Child’s play,” Rock said.

  “Like taking candy from a fuckin’ baby,” Animal added and several members guffawed.

  “Rock and I will make sure the alarm system is disengaged at the old man’s house before we teach him his lesson. We’ll meet at ten and go from there. Any questions?” Hawk asked.

  After a round of questions and answers, church was adjourned. Not all of the members were participating in the night’s activities—namely, Banger and Jax, who had obligations with their families.

  The members went into the main room to have a couple of drinks, play some pool, and have fun with the club girls. Shadow downed a shot of whiskey before going up to his room. He needed some quiet time to think over what Scarlett had told him about her dad loving his mother. He couldn’t help but think that George Mansfield was the one who was ultimately responsible for his mother’s murder. If he would’ve told his mom in the beginning that he was with solidly married instead of leading her on to believe that he was going to divorce his wife, things may have turned out very differently.

  “Fuck!” he shouted while he banged the side of his head with his fist. Shadow was sick and tired of thinking about it, and if he had his way, he’d just put George out of his mind and move on. But Scarlett loved her dad and he would always be in her life. I’m gonna have to confront him. I have to do this for her. Satisfied for the moment that he had at least made a decision, he took out his phone and texted her a quick message, telling her he was tied up but they could have dinner the following night. He kicked off his boots, then lay down on the bed and flung his arm over his eyes.

  * * *