Blind Faith (Shattered Lives, Book Four)

by Blakeley, Rissa

  “This all sounds lovely, but you said there is no one left, so how can we develop the anti-serum?”

  Erik pursed his lips and cleared his throat. “I have collected and stored bags of blood from the last chimpanzee.”

  “I see.” Tess lifted the papers, continuing to scan them. “So who are we going to give this to once we’ve developed it? There’s no one here.”

  “Let me show you.” Erik ran his finger over the touch pad on the laptop in front of them.

  Tess’ eyes widened when she saw the map of coordinates. She pulled the laptop closer. “Are those moving?”

  “Yes.” He zoomed in and she gasped.

  “Bloody fucking hell. Some are still alive?”

  Erik slipped Liam’s file in front of her. “You remember him?”

  She opened the file and smiled. “Who wouldn’t?” Resting her cheek on her fist, her fingers seemed to have a mind of their own, tracing the edges of Liam’s face. She murmured, “On my breaks, I would watch him practice on the heavy bag. Brill.” Erik lifted a brow, leaving Tess blushing. She straightened and sat back in the chair. “Right. Anyway… Of course I remember him.”

  He pulled Roger’s file out and removed the small photograph from under the paperclip. “How about him?” he asked, placing it next to the picture of Liam. Her eyes bounced between the two photographs. Erik tapped on the second one. “This is Roger.”

  “Holy motherfucking Christ!”

  “Also known as Gareth Liam Turner.”

  “Shut the fuck up right now! He was in the program, too?”

  Erik laughed. “Such a mouth on you, lass.”

  “Can it, Carlson.” She picked up both pictures and studied them. “I can’t believe this… That cocksucker is Liam’s father,” she whispered.

  “Incidentally, I don’t believe Roger was in the program. I think this was a file to recruit him as the head. The treatment of Liam, or Luke—his true name and what we’ll be calling him—was horrible and worse than the other recruits. It’s obvious to me he had no idea Roger was his father. Putting it together, my feeling is Roger was punishing Luke’s mother for something. I believe it was her locked in his flat.”

  “Wow. What a knob. He was twisted, but you would think he would want to protect his own child.”

  “Who knows? I wouldn’t want to be in that head of his. There are some outlandish things in Roger’s file that made me sick to my stomach.” Erik glanced back at the screen, checking the coordinates. “I think we should start with Luke.”

  “I understand that. How, though?”

  “I’m not sure yet. If it works, we will figure out how to get him here.” Tess broke out in laughter. “What?”

  “You really think he’s going to come back here?”

  Taken aback by Tess’ reaction, Erik furrowed his brows. “He may…if I offer him a cure.”

  She stood and patted Erik on the shoulder. “I wish you luck, mate.”

  He watched Tess walk out of the conference room. As soon as she made it to the hallway, her laughter began again.

  Erik shook his head and packed up the papers and files. “Welcome back, Tess,” he muttered.

  Chapter 12

  -North Carolina-

  Ever since Henry stopped going to Elaina’s door, stopped stalking her, stopped sitting with her, she felt hollow. While their relationship was toxic, it was the only interaction she had with him. She didn’t feel him watching her anymore.

  He was talking to others in the community, whereas Elaina remained downhearted and silent. She was jealous he spoke to them and not her. He was even smiling! She wanted him to smile at her. He was giving direction, holding bag training sessions, spending time in the library educating himself, and just being downright strong and chipper.

  Elaina knew her breaking point was on the horizon.

  She headed into the cafeteria and saw Henry leaning against the wall, talking with Chris and Jake. Telling jokes, sharing stories…laughing as if he were happy! He was supposed to be pining after her, but he was having a jolly time!

  He looked together, exactly how she wanted him to be. There was more work to do, but she had no idea how to move to the next step of mending him. All Elaina knew was she was ferociously angry.

  How dare he have fun?

  How dare he stand, looking sexy for any woman to notice him?

  He’s mine! If anyone dares to get near him, I will fucking shank them!

  Riddled with anger and sadness, Elaina plopped down in her usual spot. She seethed as she listened to them. Her hands and jaw trembled. Unable to watch Henry for another second, she decided to go get some air. She knew if she stayed there much longer, she would cry her eyes out and run right to him, begging for forgiveness.

  Tears streaming down her face, Elaina ran out of the cafeteria and went to the only place she could think of.

  Elaina dropped in front of Nick’s cross, needing him more than ever. She was so lonely and her heart always felt so empty, it ached. It felt like she was falling into a bottomless, dark pit of nothingness. The blackness seeped in and clutched at her soul, suffocating her.

  The only thing which made her happy over the past several weeks of hell was feeling the baby move for the first time. She didn’t tell a single person, not even Henry, she felt the flutters.

  Acknowledging her guilty conscience, she knew she should, but she just couldn’t tell him. It would have been one word after another, then one kiss after another…and who knew what would come after that.

  “Nick, help me. I need you,” Elaina cried loudly, but she didn’t care. “I don’t know what to do.” She rested her forehead against the cross. “Please… Tell me what to do,” she sobbed.

  As Josie walked into the cafeteria, she watched Elaina run past. A moment later, Chris followed, then Henry. Okay, she mouthed with an eye roll. Alone, Jake leaned against the wall. She did her best not to stare at him on the way to the pantry. Grabbing whatever food she could find, she made her way to the closest table. Josie sat and stared at the meager selection, wishing she had a greasy bacon cheeseburger with chili cheese fries.

  “Mind if I sit here?” She gasped and looked up. Jake stood next to her, his hands tucked into his pockets, a frown on his face. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you.”

  Her brows furrowed and lips went tight. “I suppose you can, but if you’re just going to get up and run away, I would rather eat by myself, thank you very much.”

  Jake pulled out the chair and sat. “About that-”

  Josie held her hand up. “Spare me.”

  “May I finish?” She shrugged. “I would like to apologize. I was a total dickhead to leave you hanging like that. It’s been bugging me ever since. I’m sorry.”

  “Whatever. I’m used to being alone.”

  Used to it? Yes. Enjoyed it? Absolutely not.

  Jake’s gaze dropped and he fiddled with the frayed strings in the hood of his sweatshirt. “I feel you’re owed some sort of explanation.”

  “You don’t owe me anything, Jake. You’ve given me plenty to think about,” she snapped.

  “Please, Josie. Can I talk? I have some skeletons I would like to air out…but I’m just not ready to do that yet. I don’t think it would be right for you to get involved with someone like me. Friends or otherwise.”

  Josie grabbed a package of food and squeezed it to the point of almost bursting. She growled, “Who died and made you God?” Jake’s eyes widened at her profuse anger. “How do you know what’s right for me?”

  “Trust me. If you knew about my past, you would run far and fast, and I wouldn’t blame you in the least.”

  “How do you know?”

  “I just do!” he shouted. “I have ruined people’s lives because of my behavior. Look at me, Josie… Look at my face,” he growled in frustration.

  Indignantly, she said, “Yeah?”

  Flustered, Jake clenched his fists and jaw. “What do you see?”

  “Someone who’s hiding.”<
br />
  He growled and slammed his fist down on the table, causing her to jump. “What do you physically see, Josie?”

  “Scars,” she whispered.

  “Yes, scars. They are worse on the inside than the outside. You don’t want to handle that.”

  “How do you know what I want or don’t want to handle? At the very least, I thought we could be friends, but that’s obviously not going to happen. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have socks to sort.” Josie stood and stormed away from the table.

  He put his face in his hands. “Fuck me,” he mumbled.

  Chris walked back into the cafeteria, hearing Jake curse under his breath. “I’ll pass, unless you want to take me to dinner and a movie first; otherwise, it’s a no-go, bro. I’m more into the taco-”

  Jake glanced up at Chris. “Really? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

  “What the fuck is wrong with you? Josie got your pink, prissy panties in a wad?”

  “Not really,” he grumbled.

  Chris raised his brow. “Then what’s the deal?”

  “Nothing. Just leave it. I think I’m going to go lift some weights or something.”

  “Right behind you.”

  Without knocking, Josie blew into Cora and Gunther’s room, dropping on the couch and crossing her arms. Her face scrunched up, looking like the anger would be hanging out for a while.

  Gunther glanced at Cora, who shrugged. “Something got your knickers in a twist, lass?” he asked.

  “Maybe,” Josie snapped.

  He looked at Cora again for a little guidance. She tipped her head toward the door. “I…uhh… I’ll take the kids to the library,” he said.

  “Good idea,” Cora replied and helped Gunther usher out all the kids.

  After softly closing the door, Cora sat beside her and tucked a lock of Josie’s dark hair behind her ear. “Want to talk about it?”

  Josie shrugged. “I don’t know.”

  “Well, it may help.” She sat for moment, then an idea struck her. “Tell you what. I’ll share if you will. Woman to woman.”

  “Fine.” Josie shifted on the couch and faced Cora. “I’ve been…lonely, I guess. So I was trying to talk to Jake…” Cora smiled. “What?”

  “Nothing. Continue.”

  With a heavy roll of her eyes, Josie pressed on. “At the very least, I thought I could have a friend.”

  “Is he not receptive?”

  “Ha!” She laughed sarcastically. The anger bubbled over, making Josie stand and pace in an attempt to settle down. Her hands balled into fists at her sides. “I tried talking to him, but he was an ass. The next thing I know, he’s apologizing for being an ass and wants to go for a walk. Then he acts like an ass again! Once again, he apologizes for being an ass, but tells me I wouldn’t even want to be friends with someone like him. Who the hell does he think he is? He has some nerve to tell me who I want in my life!”

  “You clearly think he’s an ass.”

  “You’re fucking right about that!”

  “Well, it sounds to me like he’s insecure. I’m sure it has to do with all the scarring he has.”

  “I don’t give two shits about that! He’s still ho-” Josie halted. Her eyes widened, realizing she just gave herself up.

  The corner of Cora’s mouth lifted. “So you like him?” After a shrug, Josie started pacing again. “It’s just you and me here.”

  “Fine. Yes,” she growled. “Christ, I hate talking to you people sometimes.”

  Cora laughed. “I imagine the feelers have been put out there and he may come around. Maybe give him time to figure himself out.”

  “Like I have a damn eternity,” she muttered, sitting next to Cora again. “I just don’t get it. Am I such a horrible person that he wouldn’t even want to be friends with me?”

  “Maybe the problem isn’t with you, Josie. He may be afraid to open up to people.” Cora took her hands. “Listen. You’re a wonderful person. A little edgy, but it’s a quality I like about you. It makes you interesting and desirable. Don’t rush things. He obviously has some issues, but I bet he’ll come to you when he’s ready.”

  “Okay, but I’m still not pleased. I’m actually rather pissed…and lonely.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Josie sighed. “So what’s your issue?”

  Cora grinned. “I suppose it’s not an issue, per sé, but more like something I would like to try.”

  “All right… I need details.”

  “I assume you know I’m fond of Gunther.”

  “Everyone knows that,” Josie muttered.

  “Oh, joy.”

  “It’s obvious. Anyway, go on…”

  Cora rubbed her palms on her floral maxi skirt. “I would like to try to get him alone so we can talk.”

  Josie’s eyebrow raised. “Talk?”

  “Yeah.”

  “Mmm-hmm, sure.”

  “Stop it. I’m being truthful. I want to talk to him. Tell him how I feel and hope he’s receptive.”

  “Good luck,” she said, laughing.

  “I know. We’ve bumped into each other, rubbed against each other, and there have been stolen glances. I walked in on him dressing once. His body is… Wow. He has also walked in me while dressing and he couldn’t take his eyes off me for a second. I just feel like there’s this sexual tension between us and it needs to be discussed.”

  Josie faked a gag. “Gross. I don’t want to talk about his body or your sexual tension!”

  Cora rolled her eyes. “I said woman to woman, Josie.”

  “I didn’t expect this! He’s like my father. I don’t want to think about him having sex, even though I caught him and Quinn waaay too many times.” She shuddered. Cora laughed. “Not funny. I’m scarred for life.”

  “Josie, stop. Making love is a beautiful thing.”

  “Not when it’s your parents! Disgusting.”

  “Stop acting like you’re twelve.”

  With a glare, Josie crossed her arms. “So… What do you want me to do then?”

  “I was hoping for an hour or so of alone time with him. Maybe you could take the kids for a play date with Maggie?”

  “Ugh… When?”

  “Sometime within the next few days, okay?”

  “I guess.”

  “Thank you so much.”

  “Just keep in mind that I don’t want any details if you all…” Josie swished her hand through the air. “You know…”

  Cora laughed. “No problem. I really just plan on talking.”

  “Whatever. I’m going to go mope in my room.” Josie stood. “See you.”

  “Don’t get too mopey. Gunther will kick your behind.”

  “I’m not afraid of him,” she muttered, walking out of the room.

  My black-haired beauty rushed past me and I clutched my chest, working bloody hard not to acknowledge her as she went by. Being diligent, I did so much to show her I could change—occupying my time, teaching others, tending to other’s needs. Most importantly, I was helping myself.

  Little did anyone know, I still watched her. If I couldn’t sleep, I’d sometimes sit against her door, hoping she would feel me there and open it, allowing me in. I could make love to her all night long, trying to gain her forgiveness.

  A few times, Gunther caught me when he would pace the halls with an inconsolable, teething Grey. It was embarrassing, but he didn’t say a word. Although, in a way, I felt like he was watching me as much as I was watching her. He seemed to show up everywhere I was at any given time of day.

  When I heard Elaina sob just as the side door closed, I gave in and decided to follow her, but Chris grabbed my arm.

  “Give her a minute,” he murmured.

  “I know we haven’t seen any undeads lately, but she can’t go out there alone,” I exclaimed, glancing back at Jake for support. He was useless and kept his trap shut. I needed someone to back me up.

  “I’ll go out there and keep her safe. Come out in a few.” Chris waltzed off, pulling out his S
ig and checking the mag. After all he did for us when we took down Roger, I entrusted him with Thomas’ gun.

  Patience was not something I excelled at, so I took off a moment after Chris did. When I pushed open the outside door, he was working his way around to the back corner of the building. I stepped toward him, trying not to make too much noise, fearing it would alarm Elaina and she would bolt. He glanced over his shoulder and motioned his head toward the graves. I peeked around the corner and the sight of her made my heart sink.

  Elaina was sobbing, clutching onto Nick’s cross.

  “Wait here,” I ordered, breaking into a sprint. I didn’t care what would transpire. I had to help her. She needed her husband at that moment, and I wasn’t about to let her down again.

  When I reached Elaina, I grabbed her arms and she fell into me. Christ, she was so warm and comfortable, exactly as I remembered.

  “Shh, love. I have you. I’m here for you,” I whispered in her ear. Wailing, she tucked her face in my neck. “Shh… You’ve got to calm down.”

  She was crying so hard, breathing seemed like a luxury she couldn’t afford. Each breath wracked her body with shudder after shudder. It frightened me.

  I had enough. Even if she kicked me out, I was going to take Elaina back to our room and get her to settle her down. I wanted to show her I could be available in her time of need. Scooping up my wife, I rushed back to the school.

  “Grab the door,” I murmured to Chris, carrying her inside.

  Elaina was right where she needed to be. In my arms.

  Continuing to rush her down the halls, the community members started to gather, whispering at the scene. I wanted to tell every one of them to fuck off and mind their own business.

  My mum ran up behind us. “Henry! Is she all right?”

  “Grab the door, please.”

  “Do you need me to help or-”

  I interrupted. “Just leave us alone for a while. Don’t let anyone bug us. I don’t care if the bloody world implodes, Mum. Please. That’s what I need you to do for us.”