Josephine Marlin and The Alternatives

by Karen Eastland

  With my jeans around my ankles and the girls laughing, I waddled my way to the sand, took them off and gave them a good shake. While running my hand down along the bum section looking for any stragglers, the stray dog who’d been following us, came over and began rubbing himself all over my bare legs.

  ‘I swear if he starts humping my leg…’ I thought.

  At the rate I was going, I didn’t think the girls were going to make it. Even Pony was falling over with laughter. Even though I was having trouble, I was feeling happy to see Pony laughing just like she always did before…

  ‘Get away from me, dog,’ I yelled while trying to put my right leg back into my jeans. He almost toppled me as I raised my left leg.

  ‘Go away,’ I yelled again, ‘and let me get dressed damn it.’

  Carefully climbing back on the bike, I gently lowered my arse to the seat in case there were any gee’s left. Pony was on the trailer again, uncovered this time (no more slime showers for me thank you very much), and Ann was on the handlebars… Oh goody!

  Eventually, we began coasting down along the white sandy track in silence. The front tyre kept digging into the sand, making the bike skid from side to side now and then. If it weren’t for the trailer, we would’ve had to walk it because it was the only thing keeping us upright. I thought about stopping to pump up the tyre, but it was so dark, I didn’t want to lose any important parts. If it hadn’t been for my skill, I was certain we’d have fallen off again, at least once more.

  We’d travelled about a hundred meters from where we’d had the incident, and the track had started to grow dark around us unusually fast.

  It felt as if the trees were closing in on me, and I was so busy looking up at the sky wondering where all the stars had gone, that I almost didn’t see the stray dog run in front of the bike. Swerving to miss him, we ended up off the track and in to the bush. Pulling over, we attempted to turn the bike around to get back on the track, that’s when I heard a loud cracking noise. Then the ground began to shake as if something extremely large had hit it. We tried to see what had hit the ground, but it had become so dark I could barely see the others.

  ‘That was a tree,’ called Deb from the rear seat. ‘If you hadn’t swerved when you did Jo, we’d have been crushed.

  ‘Dog made me swerve… Maybe he can stay with us after all.’

  The darkness of the forest had become so dense I could barely see anything let alone my friends. I was able to see Pony’s glow, but even that was only showing me where Pony was. The forest seemed to have absorbed all our light sources. It was an eerie, otherworldly darkness.

  ‘I think we should get off and walk it,’ I whispered, looking around as if someone was watching us.

  ‘Good idea,’ said Deb. ‘We need to keep our hands on the bike though, so we don’t get separated.’

  ‘Why’s it so dark?’ asked Ann.

  ‘I don’t know,’ I said, ‘but I’m glad you noticed it too.’

  ‘Pony,’ I whispered. ‘You come up here with me and hold the handlebars. Don’t let go. I can use your glow to help keep us from trouble. Everyone ready?’

  ‘As I’ll ever be,’ said Ann.

  ‘Alright,’ was Deb’s shaky reply.

  Dog brushed against my legs, and I heard him pant as he walked alongside us. We took hold of the bike and started to weave our way through the bush. It would’ve been scary enough to go that way with the moon and stars to guide us. It was downright eerie without them.

  I felt a sudden pull on the bike, and before I could ask if the others were okay, I heard Deb screaming some distance from where we were.

  ‘Help,’ Deb cried.

  ‘Deb?’ Ann was calling in a panic.

  ‘Something’s got me by the leg! Help me,’ she yelled, it sounded as if she was moving further away from where we were, with each scream.

  Taking Pony by the hand, we moved to where Ann was. We all walked together, and I used Pony’s glow to light the way.

  ‘Deb? Keep screaming so we can find you,’ I called, knowing it wasn’t going to be a problem. ‘Who’s got you?’

  ‘The vines, watch out for the vines; they’ve wrapped around my legs. They’re pulling me deeper into the forest.’

  We kept walking, and Deb’s voice was getting closer. We decided to fan out a little, but kept hold of each others fingers, while also keeping an eye out for the vines.

  ‘There!’ I called to Ann. ‘There she is.’

  Taking Pony’s hand, we ran to her.

  ‘Help me!’ Deb was screaming. She was hysterical by the time we reached her. ‘Help me.’

  Pony and I had started pulling at the vines, and Deb kept up her screams for Ann to follow. I saw Ann running towards us as she became visible in Pony’s glow, but she couldn’t see me.

  She was getting closer, and I pulled at the vines around Debs’ legs, while trying to let Ann know where we were.

  With the crack and rustle of the leaves underfoot, it was obvious she didn’t hear my cries for her to stop. The next thing I knew I was on the ground; Ann was on top of me; and Deb had been pulled away again because Pony let go of Deb to save me from Ann.

  Ann was about to pound me into the forest floor. If it weren’t for Pony’s glow, I wouldn’t have been able to see the fist hovering above my face. I moved my head just in time because Ann hit the ground so hard, it caused another ground shaking airwave explosion.

  ‘Get off me!’ I demanded, amidst Deb’s cries for help. I rolled Ann off to the forest floor.

  ‘You almost pounded me into the ground,’ I yelled while brushing the leaves from my clothes.

  ‘Do it again Ann,’ we heard Deb call. She sounded like she was some distance from us.

  Ann and I stood and quietly held hands, waiting for her to scream.

  ‘You set up for another Annquake,’ I said. ‘Pony and I’ll see if we can follow her voice. C’mon Pony, let’s find Deb.’

  Listening to her screams for help, I was feeling more than a little frightened, but Pony seemed to know where we were going. Ann must’ve pounded the ground because as it shook, we fell to the forest floor right next to Deb.

  She looked like she’d been wrapped in some type of cocoon. I saw the vines reaching up from the ground, wrapping themselves around her head.

  ‘Quick Pony, we need to get the vines off her. Can you pick her up?’ I asked hoping that in getting Deb off the ground, we’d be able to stop the vines from wrapping her up. I knew if they continue, we would lose Deb for sure. She was looking like a vine and leaf covered log.

  Pony tried to lift her, but the vines were holding her to the ground. Some pulled away, but there were thousands of them. We began tearing at them and kept calling to let Ann know where we were. Dog arrived with Ann not far behind him.

  ‘Ann,’ I said, ‘punch the ground. See if you’re able to loosen their grip on her throat.’

  ‘What do you mean, punch the ground?’ Ann called.

  ‘Reach in and pull out your inner war goddess and just do it!’ I yelled.

  Pony and I tore at the vines, while Dog gnawed at those trying to wrap around us. Deb was making an odd whistling noise, but she’d stopped wriggling. I’d become concerned they’d strangled her. Ann launched her fists so hard into the ground, we all fell over, even Dog, and I watched as the vines pull back from Deb.

  ‘I’m okay,’ Deb said with a growling cough. Her voice sounded raw and scratchy, and she was looking at me laying next to her on the ground. She had a dazed look in her eyes. Pony and Dog set about to pull the last of the vines from her. Ann’s punch was so powerful; I was certain I saw a few trees uproot and run away. It’d knocked her over too. I wouldn’t want to mess with Deb, after glimpsing Ann’s strength when she saw her sister in danger.

  ‘Is everyone alright?’ I asked trying to stand up, but for some reason, I couldn’t move my shoulders.

  ‘Guy’s?’ I called, trying not to panic, ‘I’m pretty sure the vines have wound their way around me. I ca
n’t get up.’

  Pony leaned over me and looked down in fear, then I felt Ann and Deb pulling at the vines.

  ‘Stop!’ I called as best I could. ‘Every time you pull a vine off me, another vine wraps itself around my neck, and the others tighten.’

  I thought the vines must’ve learned from their mistake with Deb. It felt like they were protecting their prey, me, from the others. I watched as the girls pulled back, and I could hear them discussing how best to release me while Dog gnawed at the vines around my neck, and Pony tore away at the ones around my legs. It seemed like it was working, but the vines around my neck were growing back quicker than Dog could tear them away. While Pony and Dog worked on removing them, I could hear Ann and Deb argue about the best way to help.

  ‘Just punch the ground again,’ said Deb. ‘It worked for me.’

  ‘I could, but what if I punch the ground and the vines wrap around me. It didn’t take long to incapacitate Jo,’ I heard Ann say. ‘If I get tied up, who’s going to punch the ground then?’

  ‘Help,’ I called, but the vines were so tight I could barely squeeze the words out.

  Suddenly Dog stopped chewing and began barking at the twins.

  ‘Oh God,’ I heard them say. Then I was pretty sure I lost consciousness for a moment or two because suddenly the voices from my dreams were whispering to me.

  ‘Andoré, wake! Wake up Andoré. Now!’

  Winged Assassin

  I felt the ground shake, and the vines loosen as my eyes flew open. Gasping for breath, my hands flew to my throat to tear at the vines, but they were gone.

  I knew my eyes were open because I could see Pony standing over me, and knew I was awake because I could feel Dog licking my face, but I couldn’t hear anything. Pony’s lips were moving, but I couldn’t hear the words. I couldn’t even hear the sounds of the forest.

  I saw Deb look down at me, then look away. I saw her lips moving; then Ann looked down at me too.

  Everyone was talking, but I couldn’t hear a word.

  I lay on the ground while they stood around, looking down in concern, but I do anything, and did I tell you I was deaf?

  Then those voices I usually only hear in dream began speaking to me.

  ‘Andoré, you must stand. You have much to do. They’re coming, Andoré,’ they whispered.

  ‘Andoré get up!’ they demanded when suddenly I heard the sounds of the night and the panicked voices of my friends.

  Lying on the ground, I could almost see the moon and stars above me, but the treetops looked imposing in the heavy darkness that had fallen over the forest. Then to my horror, I felt a tickling in my throat. I began tearing away at the vines that’d begun to wrap around me again. I wasn’t feeling strong enough to stand on my own, so all I could do was pull at them.

  They were obscure tendrils of fine vine hiding beneath the brush on the ground. I could see them moving beneath the leaves. I watched as they reached up from the earth, trying to latch on to anything that walked by. They looked like cotton, but to bind me like they did, like they were, they were a lot stronger than that. They did, however, pull back when Ann hammered the ground with her fists, so I knew they could be defeated.

  ‘Is someone going to help me up?’ I asked, looking up at them as I tore at the vines.

  Someone said, ‘Get her legs,’ and I felt hands grabbing my shoulders and feet. They were trying to pick me up.

  ‘I can stand on my own,’ I protested, ‘just help me up before the vines suffocate me.’

  Standing upright I felt a little woozy, and Pony almost knocked me down again when she ran into me for a hug. I just wanted to get out of the forest.

  ‘Are we able to get back on the bike?’ I asked, putting my hands around my neck to try to ease the internal coarseness I felt each time I spoke. ‘I don’t want those vines to grab me again.’

  ‘I’m good to get back on the bike,’ said Deb, as we made our way through the bush searching for it.

  ‘Oh my god, how far were you dragged?’ I asked Deb. ‘Where’s the bike?’

  ‘I’m sure we’re almost there,’ said Ann. ‘There, see.’

  I did see. I wanted to get off the forest floor as quick as I could, so picked up my pace and ran to the bike before anything else could grab me.

  ‘Deb, you and Ann get on either side of the trailer, but just use one leg to help push us through the undergrowth. Keep the other off the ground. I can see the vines reaching up from under the leaves and litter, searching for something to grab hold of.’

  ‘We can do that,’ said Deb, ‘but are you alright to be riding?’

  ‘I’m alright, I just want to get the hell out of here as fast as possible, but if you feel anything touch your legs at all, get back on the trailer. I’ll know if something’s wrong because the trailer pulls back on the bike when there’s movement from behind.’

  ‘Okay,’ said Ann.

  I could see a light in the distance, and hear faint music ahead of us. I’d started to wonder if we were about to come out of the forest into someone’s backyard barbecue when I saw a set of car headlights flash against the treetops. Then they disappeared into the forest.

  ‘We’re almost somewhere,’ I called to the girls who were pushing the bike along nicely. I’d turned my head slightly to look back at them when something large and black flew into my face.

  It pulled me from the bike, it was that strong, and before I knew what was happening, I was flying through the air with something large and black wrapped around my head and face.

  It dropped me to the ground, knocking the wind out of me. Then it began dragging me by the hair at some speed across the forest floor. I was rolling from side to side trying to pull free, but it held tight to the back of my hair, dragging me away from my friends.

  I couldn’t make out what had me, and thought it was a bird, though it definitely had hands. They kept hold of my hair in a tight grip. Then it started biting me on the arm. I think it was trying to eat me. Its talons were long, and I could feel them as they went about stripping the flesh from my face. I felt the warmth of blood run down along my cheeks to pool in my ears, where it streamed to the forest floor.

  I don’t know how long I was on the ground wrestling with the creature, but I could hear the girls screaming for me, and Dog barking. They all sounded as if they were a long way away. I tried to scream, but the creature pulled my face tight into its feathery body. The forest vines were again banding themselves around my legs, and tendrils were moving up from my feet. If I hadn’t been fighting so hard against the creature, the forest would’ve bound my hands as well.

  I was panicking. The forest wanted to bury me, and the creature wanted to kill me. It was intent on eating me alive. I’d begun to feel weak and recall wishing I had something to smack it on the head with, and before I knew what had happened, a wooden club appeared in my hand.

  ‘Poof! Like magic,’ as Pony would say.

  I didn’t have time to wonder where it’d come from; I used it to whack, and whack that creature until it finally let go. I’d beaten it into the ground and was about to try and stand so I could get another few whacks in, when it picked itself up. As it ran away, I got one more whack in behind its strange looking legs, knocking it down once again before it could get away. Moving in to whack it with a kill blow, a set of bright headlights shone through the bushes, blinding me and giving it time to run away.

  Watching the creature go, it looked like a small flightless bird, and I was pretty certain I saw hair catching in the breeze. I fell to the ground when I was sure it’d left. I felt too weak to get up, but the forest vines began tightening around me, and I had blood dripping from my face.

  I lifted my club up behind my head and slipped it under my neck to try to keep the vines from choking me again.

  ‘Josephine,’ I heard my friends calling out in panic.

  ‘Here! I’m over here!’ I started calling, ‘Help me!’

  I don’t know how long I’d been calling for them,
it felt like a long time. My throat was sore from earlier, and I was sure I was dying as I lay on the ground, while looking up into a black, starless night. Now and then the voices from my dreams would talk to me as if they were keeping me company until help arrived. Help did arrive in the form of a beautiful fluffy dog.

  ‘Ah my knight in shining armour,’ I hoarsely whispered, as Dog came out of the brush. He began gnawing at the vines, and the girls weren’t far behind.

  Pony sat down, pushed the club away, and lay my head on her lap while the others freed me. Occasionally a vine reached for my head, but Pony pulled it up until it was taut, let it spring back to the ground, then she’d punch the area just like Ann did. Only without the quake.

  The vines didn’t seem to like Pony. I watched a few stretch around her legs, then saw them pull back. It was as if they didn’t like the taste of her ooze. Any vines trying to grab the others, Pony pushed away. I couldn’t move anything other than my head and hands and was watching my friends work hard to pull the last of the vines from my body, when a tear hit my face. Looking up, I saw Pony was crying.

  ‘Why are you crying?’ I asked. ‘Everything’s alright.’

  ‘Pony sowy. Lub Jo. Sowy Jo. Jo no doe pop. Jo stay wit Pony.’

  ‘I’m not going pop anytime soon, and I love you too.’ I said, trying to stem the flow of ghoul tears.

  ‘There,’ said the twins, ‘you can get up now.’

  Before I could even attempt to stand, a certain puppy started to lick my face. I didn’t mind; I was happy to have made another friend. Pony picked me up and carried me back to the bike. She wouldn’t let me walk, and the twins asked lots of questions.

  ‘What happened?’ asked Ann. ‘Did the vines pull you down?’

  ‘You were pulled from the bike so fast,’ said Deb. ‘I’m sure I saw you fly through the air, and you were dragged a long way very quickly. What was it?’

  ‘I don’t know what had me, but at least it dragged me closer to those cars over there,’ I said pointing to lights shining a short way ahead of us.