To Live and To Love (Black Wolf Agency Book 1)

by Jessica Swan

  Now he had to get the prize. James quickly walked to the room where the artifacts were stored. Of course there was a code, but since he was the one to verify who entered and who didn’t, that part was easy. Disengaging the security was not so much. But he asked all the right questions when the repairman had been here. Of course, he had been the one who had accidentally tripped and threw a whole glass of milk on the circuit board. That had been a classic screw up, and even his aunt even had believed it to be accidental.

  The security repairman had to give him the code to disarm the lasers that protected the room, just in case it happened again. The burning smell of milk had been enough to empty the building, but it had also caused the vault to lock down. Now he had the code, and he put it in quickly and then took a deep breath and waited. It seemed like it took forever for the little click to tell him it was safe. Of course, it did not help that his palms were sweating since he was technically committing a crime.

  James walked to the case that held what he wanted and sighed. He was finally going to retrieve the amulet, placing it in his jacket pocket. He quickly left the artifact room, enabled the alarm again, and quickly snuck out of the building with it, securing the main entrance on his way out.

  On his way home, James kept looking over his shoulder, paranoid and afraid someone would yell at him to come back. By the sixth block he finally began to breathe normally. He couldn’t help but smile as he remembered when he had first met Kate…

  It was a gorgeous night. James was on vacation and there wasn’t anything on TV that night, so he decided to do something new for a change and go to a nightclub. Yes, that was new to him, considering what a geek had had been only a few months before. Now, he was an agent, with a super secret decoder ring to match. ‘I have to get out more,’ he thought to himself, as he wandered down the street, looking for a bar to go in to.

  When he arrived, he noticed her sitting at the bar with her back to him. He felt instinct take over and walked over to take a seat next to her. As soon as he sat down, she turned his way and her beautiful hazel eyes caught his gaze, mesmerizing him. They smiled at each other, introduced themselves, and he bought her a drink. At that moment, he couldn’t believe how amazingly well things were going for him. He had never been comfortable talking to women before, so this was a first. James was surprised when, after talking for a while, they made their way outside to go for a walk. Things were going really well; James wanted to pat himself on the back, but thought it would be too obvious.

  Kate was beautiful with porcelain features reminded him of a doll. Her hair was brown and wavy with loose curls that met just above her shoulders. She was shorter than him; he could tell even when they were sitting, since her feet never reached the floor, but when she stood up he knew for sure that she was a few inches shorter than him. She was thin, yet very well put together. Her slim, but curvy figure made him wonder what she would look like without the sexy, Victorian-inspired dress she was wearing.

  After walking around the block a few times, since James didn’t want to see some creature and have to kill it, they decided to go back to his apartment. James couldn’t believe he was bringing someone to his apartment that he just met, but there was just something about this woman that pulled him in. It was more than physical; it was hard to put into words.

  When they arrived at his place, James’s level of nervousness was at an all-time high; they barely knew one another. Would he screw this up somehow? What if she wasn’t who she seemed? But he felt a strong connection; one he could not help but act on. Thank goodness he did, he and Kate could have lit up the sky with their passion. It had been the best night of his life.

  The morning after, he woke to discover she had left. He sensed she was a vampire from the minute he had touched her and felt her cool skin. Then, when he hadn’t felt a heartbeat in her chest, he knew for sure. He also knew it should have bothered him or worried him, but he couldn’t bring himself to regret the want he felt for her. James had hoped she would have stayed, especially after the incredible passion they shared. Knowing what he knew about her, he truly understood why she had left before the crack of dawn.

  Repeating the resurrection ceremony would be difficult. He didn’t even know if it was possible without a body or ashes from which to revive. And it wasn’t like he could go a hunt down a witch and make her perform the spell. No, he had to do it by himself, so at least he knew he had tried, even if it ended up failing.

  He drew the images from his memory of that night when he and Kate had performed the ritual together. He placed five candles carefully in a circle, each candle representing the points of a star. The fact that he even had that many candles surprised him. After the candles were delicately placed in their positions, he laid the amulet gently in the very center of the candles and placed Kate’s necklace on top of it.

  Everything was laid out the same, but instead of a body, or at least remnants of a body, the only thing that remained was her necklace, the necklace that had been left behind when she vanished. He assumed there was a small fragment of her DNA left on it, or at least he hoped there was.

  He made a cut on his arm with a kitchen knife and bled onto her necklace and the Resurrection Amulet. As he recited the Latin phrase over and over, the memories replayed in his head, clearer than ever.

  He continued to let his blood drip onto her necklace and the amulet. As he did so, he closed his eyes and continued the chant… hoping… praying…

  Nothing happened. Well, that was certainly a letdown. After all this… and nothing.

  Heartbroken, James turned away and plopped down in his chair in defeat. He couldn’t keep the tears from escaping his eyes, for his love was gone… gone. All he would have now was the memory of her. He would always remember that last night he spent with her…

  “I don’t belong in this world, James,” said Kate in her sweet French accent, her teary hazel eyes meeting his. “I don’t want to live like this anymore.”

  “What do you mean? Are you not happy here…? With me…?” he asked, his nervous heart pounding hard in his chest. He didn’t like where this was going…and hoped the answer was not him.

  “No, it’s not you, James. Of course it’s not you. I love you. No, it’s what I am. I’m not an evil person, but what I am is evil.”

  “How can any part of you be evil? You’ve never killed anyone. You feed on donated blood and animal blood? And that is saying a lot since some of the people I deal with seem to think that is a huge inconvenience not to kill people. You, on the other hand, are nothing like the other vampires.”

  “I know, but if I wait too long to feed, there’s no telling what I might do. I feel like just me being here is endangering you.”

  “I know you won’t hurt me, Kate.”

  “How can you be so sure of that when I don’t even know myself?”

  “I know in my heart you would never hurt me, sweetheart,” he said, taking both of her hands and holding them tight. When Kate pulled her hands away, James felt his heart sink a little further in his chest.

  “James, I’m a vampire and you’re– well, as wonderful as you are, you’re just a normal human. I love you, but I am tired, tired of this half life, and you deserve so much more. If I leave now you can move on.”

  “Normal humans have no idea of the dangers that exist in this world or things that I know about. So, no, Kate, I am far from normal.”

  “Just because you’re soundly skilled, doesn’t mean you’ll be able to defend yourself against one of my kind if they attack you. I am being serious here, and you should listen-”

  “I am listening, but you are not listening to me. I already have proved my abilities, Kate! Remember the vampire we resurrected? The one who originally converted you? Was it not I, who plunged the stake in his heart to kill him? I did it to save you, and now you are talking about leaving me.”

  “You were lucky.”

  "Maybe, but I did it for you nonetheless.”

  “I don’t want you dying for me�
�� or because of me.”

  “So, what are you saying? That it is okay for me to go out a risk my life every day for the good of the world, but when it comes to you, that I was just lucky, and I should sit behind the desk and smile. Really? It that how you think of me, and all that we mean to one another?”

  “I have already made up my mind. Do you know how old I am, how many lives I have seen? Too many. I love you, but I have to do this. Please, let me go, but, before I leave, I want to watch the sunrise with you.”

  “But that’ll kill you! How can you even ask that of me?”

  “Yes, it’s the death I’ve been dreaming of for three-hundred years, since the day my heart stopped beating. My hope is since I’ve always tried to be a good person; there will be a wonderful afterlife waiting for me, better than this life. I want you to be happy for me.”

  “No, Kate… I love you,” James said, tears beginning to fall from his eyes.

  “I know… I love you, too,” Kate confessed, her eyes glazed over with tears as well.

  Their eyes met for a moment. All Kate could see was pain.

  When James gazed into Kate’s eyes, all he could see was pain and longing. He had no idea how difficult of a life she had had. To dream of how much better the afterlife might be than the life she was living, proved to him that she wasn’t happy. He was being selfish by wanting her to stay one more lifetime with him.

  “Will you watch the sunrise with me?” Kate asked, managing to smile through her tears.

  The pain James was feeling at that moment was unbearable. Without a word, he forced a smile and nodded. For once in his life, he did not have a comeback; he was losing his best friend and lover forever, there didn’t really seem to be any words to describe it.

  They stood up, walked out onto the balcony outside the living room in his apartment, and gazed at the horizon as the orange glow above it grew brighter and brighter.

  Instead of watching the sunrise, Kate found herself gazing into the eyes of the man next to her, the man she loved. Kate wondered, ‘Am I making a mistake?’

  As the sun’s gentle, early-morning rays began to touch her skin, Kate knew now that it was too late to change her mind. She felt the pain of it burning her flesh, but suppressed her emotions. Kate knew any sign that she was in pain would only make James suffer more.

  Then, James watched, the woman he loved dissolve into a cloud of bright, golden dust and after that, disappear completely.

  Burying his face in his hands, James cried like he had never cried before, with all the pain and sadness hitting him at once.

  It was then that James noticed; lying on the floor in front of him was the beautiful, silver and black, Gothic necklace Kate always wore. He bent down and picked it up carefully, gazing at the large black diamond in the center of it. He promised himself that he would take good care of the necklace, not because of the value of it, but because it was the last piece that remained of his one and only true love…

  Then, out of the corner of his eye, something caught his attention, bringing him back to the present. At first, he thought it was the light from the candles flickering, but when he turned, he saw a small swirl of golden dust rising from where the necklace and amulet lay on the table.

  James sat, frozen in place in anticipation. He watched as the swirl of golden dust slowly began to grow larger and gather taking a solid form, a form he began to recognize very well…

  Things didn’t feel right to Kate. There was too much light, but somehow she couldn’t see enough to make out where she was. She wondered, ‘What’s happening to me?’

  Her eyes weren’t used to the bright light after being in the dark for so long, so she forced them closed. How was that possible? How was she supposed to be able to see at all? Where was the bright light coming from?

  She felt a tremendous heat build around her, and she felt like she was moving fast, so very fast, swirling round and round like she was in a tornado. It was a very strange feeling she’d never felt before.

  Suddenly, she was very still and curled up in a fetal position. The air around her felt warm, yet the surface beneath her was cool. She willed herself to open her eyes, afraid of what she might find, or where she might be.

  She turned her head and looked up at the ceiling, blinking rapidly as her eyes adjusted to the light in the room. She was not in the same place she had been moments ago.

  Kate heard slow footsteps approaching her. She was afraid to look, but she forced herself to anyway. Her eyes found him, just as he stood beside her, gently covering her body with a soft blanket. She hadn’t realized until then that she was naked.

  “James?” she said, gazing into his eyes in disbelief. She had been dreaming of him again, something she had to do in order to make it through the time she spent in the dark place she had been in. Kate moved her hands and arms around; finally she was free to stretch and move. She felt the stiffness and pain in her limbs, but pain was good; it meant that she was here and not there. While she had been there it had been so hard to not focus on the pain. But she had done it, because it had been her choice to endure that sunrise and give up the life she had. And, oh, what a mistake that had been.

  James watched her closely; the love of his life had just come back from the dead. He couldn’t believe he did it. “It’s you… I can’t believe it’s really you!” he said excitedly with the biggest smile she’d ever seen on his face. Even though he had been upset and crying only seconds before the resurrection had started to take place, now his eyes were burning with tears of joy.

  “What am I doing here?” she asked, still in shock. "Wait, how did you do this? James you are not supposed to be messing around with magic. You don’t know what could happen."

  “Please don’t be mad at me, Kate,” he pleaded, his expression changing from joy to worry. "You have no clue how much I miss you. I had to do this; I had to bring you home to me."

  She sat up on the table and faced him. Then she grabbed his warm hands and looked into his eyes. She never thought she would escape that place. But she didn’t want James to even think about messing with that type of magic again without help. James was just wasn’t built for that type of darkness. Very few humans were, if any. She looked around at the apartment. The place had been completely rearranged and was a bit messier since she died. She wanted to know how long she had been gone. She had so many questions, but right now she didn’t care how she got here. She was just happy to be home.

  “You have no idea what I’ve been through,” she said, pausing for a moment to take a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I had no idea what would happen to me after I died. It was so dark… so cold… I was so alone. It was nothing like I thought. I guess being a Vampire was just not a good mix with where I thought I was going to go. How long have I been gone?”

  “A year.”

  She tried to hide the tears that began to form in her eyes, but she couldn’t. He pulled her close and embraced her. Oh, how she missed his warm embrace.

  He ran his fingers gently through her wavy, shoulder-length, brown hair and whispered, “You’re home now, Kate. You’ll never be alone again.”

  Together Forever

  ~ Chapter Two ~

  It felt so good for him to have her back in his arms once again. It felt as if a giant weight had been lifted from his chest. The gaping hole where his heart once belonged was finally beating once again.

  Screw Black Wolf Agency. Screw the Resurrection Amulet. He knew in his heart that she was his destiny, his one reason for living. Yeah, he had the coolest job ever, and he had just worked magic and now knew he could successfully bring someone back from the dead, but without Kate, it meant nothing to him.

  She gazed into his loving, brown eyes, and they soon found themselves kissing. When their lips parted, James’s lips continued their journey down, showing his loving affection for her by placing soft kisses along her cool, smooth skin until he reached her neck.

  “You have a destiny, James,” she said with an impatient sigh
. “You make a big difference in the lives of the people in this city. They need you. You have a job to do, and by taking the Amulet and bringing me back, you could have lost your future.”

  “You’re my future, Kate. You’re my destiny,” he said to her, placing his hands on each side of her face and gazing deep into her eyes. “I don’t care about Black Wolf Agency or anyone else, for that matter. All I want is you. I don’t know what I’d do without you, Kate. I know you’re a vampire, and I’m a human, but we can make it work. You’re not going anywhere again. I won’t let you. You’re my soul mate. For now, let’s not worry about anything, just you and me. We can just have tonight, before the real world sets in. Just please don’t ask to go back,” he pleaded to her in almost a whisper.

  “I don’t want to go back,” she said, to his surprise.

  “What? But you just said-” he asked, confused.

  “I meant your destiny is to work for Black Wolf Agency, to protect humanity and the common good. I said nothing about my destiny, since apparently fate has brought me back to you,” she said with a smile. “I belong by your side. I know that now. I was foolish before to believe otherwise.”

  He smiled back at her and leaned forward to kiss her. She put her index finger between their lips to stop him.

  “Ah, ah, ah!” she said.

  “What is it, sweetheart?” he asked, worry in his tone of voice.

  “Unless you want to become my next meal, I need to find some blood, fast.”

  She had to be honest. She was indeed thirsty beyond comprehension. The fact that she hadn’t preyed upon him already was based solely on the fact that her love for him was stronger than her thirst. If she had been that close to any other human, they would be dead by now.