FALSE 9: Red Card Series

by Erickson, Megan

  She started screaming all over again and Mike threw his hands in the air. “I had an off day,” he announced loudly while his teammates gave him shit.

  All I wanted to do was lay down. My stomach was protruding painfully, like I was about to give birth to a seven-pound, eight-ounce bundle of feathered joy. After taking my picture, the manager handed me a crisp Benjamin. I shoved it in my pocket as I grabbed my hoodie. We had to go before my body chose a hole to expel all this food from. I didn’t even want to be there for that, let alone anyone else. I threw my arm around Bianca’s shoulders. “Ready?”

  She nodded, still grinning from ear to ear. “Let’s take a long way home, I need to walk this off, don’t you?”

  “Yeah,” I said. “We can go a long way home.” As much as I wanted to lay down, I knew if I did I probably wouldn’t be able to breathe.

  We headed outside, walking leisurely on the sidewalk since neither of us were feeling like moving too fast. As we passed a park, I kicked a rock, sending it flying into a bush. “So what made you want to enter an eating contest?”

  She shrugged. “I always wanted to. I spent so many years being really careful about what I ate, and doing something like that was out of the question, so I wanted to see what it was like.”

  “Why were you careful about what you ate?” I asked. She bit her lip, brow creasing, and I wasn’t stupid. I could tell by the look on her face that she was considering how to evade the question or tell me a lie. “Actually, it’s fine. You don’t have to answer that. I’m glad that you got to do it now. You had fun?”

  She brightened immediately, her shoulders losing the tension that had been there a moment ago. “It was awesome. And I got second place!”

  “Why’d you drag me along?”

  She grinned at me, her hand squeezing my hip. “Because I knew it’d be more fun if you were there.” That sentence made me want to stick out my chest with pride. “I didn’t realize you were going to crush the competition though. You were a machine.”

  I didn’t feel like a machine. I felt like I was going to vomit. And just as the thought crossed my mind, my stomach churned. Oh shit. “Uh oh,” I whispered, horrified, trying desperately to swallow as my mouth filled with saliva and my throat jerked.

  “Nooo,” I moaned. I was Bianca’s hero! Her Knight in Chicken Wing Armor. And here I was about to blow chunks all over the sidewalk. My throat gave one last jerk, and I knew there was no holding back the inevitable. I rushed toward the grass and proceeded to empty the contents of my stomach in a forceful gush. I didn’t have control over my body anymore. My stomach was all hell no, this won’t do, and all I could do was stand there, bent over while my muscles contracted.

  A hand landed on my back, petting me, as if my mortification over throwing up in front of her wasn’t bad enough. She had to be right there. I tried to wave her away with my hand but then my stomach squeezed again and I spewed the rest of the wings.

  I braced my hands on my knees, head hung between my shoulders, wondering if there would be one time, one-fucking-time that I would be with Bianca where something crazy didn’t happen. First we ran from the cops, then I got my clothes stolen, and now I was puking like a kid who ate too much chocolate.

  I moaned, my head throbbing, my stomach protesting, and my neck tight from throwing up. A bottle of water was shoved in my face. And I reached for it. When I was sure I could stand, I straightened and took a huge gulp of water, swishing it around in my mouth before spitting it out. Then I did it again before drinking the rest of the bottle down, hoping it settled my stomach.

  Only then did I meet Bianca’s eyes. Her lips were pressed together and she was trying to not to laugh. I pointed a finger at her. “Don’t tell anyone I threw up. They’ll pry this money from my cold, dead hands.”

  She laughed. “I would never.”

  I grinned. “Tasted about the same going down as it did going up.”

  “Ewwww!” She wrinkled her nose and smacked me on the shoulder. “That’s disgusting.”

  I wiggled my eyebrow. “How about a kiss?”

  She backed away laughing, hands up as if to push me away. “No, stay away from me!”

  I pushed my lips out. “Come on, just a little one.”

  She laughed harder. “Don’t touch me.” But she was biting her tongue, and her body was braced to run. She wanted me to chase? I’d fucking chase. I was about twenty-pounds lighter now.

  I lunged at her and she screamed, taking off on a fast sprint down the sidewalk, me on her heels. I caught up to her in no time and wrapped my arms around her waist, hauling her off her feet while she yelled and kicked her legs, although she wasn’t kicking too hard. I shoved my face in her neck, kissing the skin there with purposefully loud smacking noises while Bianca giggled and screeched my name.

  I loved it. I loved her in my arms, I loved her saying my name while I made her laugh so hard she couldn’t breathe. When I finally set her back on her feet, she wrapped her fingers around my wrists where they were still locked around her middle. But she didn’t shove me off. If anything, she held my hands there.

  “Thanks for doing that with me.” She was no longer laughing, and I craned my neck to look at her, to see that she had her gaze on our hands at her stomach.

  “Wouldn’t have missed it. I got a Benjamin out of it, and I got to hang out with you.”

  She wanted to experience life more than anyone I’d ever met. The world was her playground, and it felt good to play with Bianca. When she was around, everything was bright, food tasted better, hell the air was fresher. Maybe because she was breathing the same oxygen I was.

  I caught the large smile as it crossed her face. She stepped out of my embrace and I let her go. She turned, walking backward, her hand up in a wave. “I told Michael I’d be back before dark, and I’m cutting it close.”

  She was. The sun was halfway out of sight. “You need a ride? I don’t have a car, but I can borrow Shane’s trash heap. We’re closer to my place than Coach’s.”

  “You don’t have a car?”

  I shook my head. “I did and then it died right before fall semester. Haven’t had a chance to get another one. Shane lets me borrow his whenever I want.”

  She smiled. “Well, I’m good. I parked close. Sorry I gotta run.”

  “It’s okay. Just promise me you’ll let me spend this hundred on you.”

  Her feet stopped moving. She stilled. “What?”

  Was I reading into this? Sure we kissed, but maybe… maybe she kissed her guy friends. She couldn’t know I was much less casual about that shit than she was. I forced myself not to retreat or mumble something asinine. “Can I take you out?” Her chest rose and fell, and her hands fidgeted at her sides as her eyes went unfocused over my shoulder. Fuck. I’d messed it up. “I mean, no pressure. Or whatever. I could take my roommates out instead, but you’re prettier to look at than Dre, so I thought…” What had I thought? What was I going to do? Take her out on a date and ask her to be my girlfriend? Get fucking real, Lavin. First reason this was a terrible idea—Coach would kill me. Second reason—Coach would kill me. Third reason—she was out of my league. And fourth reason—Coach would kill me.

  I waved my hands, the paper thin bill in my pocket now feeling like a hundred pound weight. “Never mind. You gotta get home before Coach comes looking for you, finds me, and I end up fed to his cat.”

  She still hadn’t said a damn word, just stood there looking like she’d seen a ghost. “You okay to walk, B?”

  Her head jerked, her eyes finally focusing on me. She smiled then, but it was the one I didn’t like, the fake one I’d seen her use with Mike and other people. People that weren’t me. My stomach rolled again. “Y-yes. Fine,” she stammered.

  I frowned at her, and once again the thought struck me that I could be just one of many guys she’d befriended on campus. Maybe there was one guy who took her out to dinner, another who walked her to class, and yet another who fed her grapes while he fanned her with palm leav
es.

  The thought made me way to rage and cry at the same time. “Okay. Drive safe.”

  I turned to walk away, which wasn’t even the way to my townhouse, but I didn’t want to have to walk past her. I didn’t want to smell her hair, or see that shocked look on her face. I wanted to pretend I was cool, that I could handle this casual thing we were doing.

  I didn’t hear her voice calling me back, but I also didn’t hear her footsteps either. When I reached the corner I glanced over my shoulder, but she was gone.

  Six

  Lavin-proof Mascara

  Seven thirty in the morning on Saturday in a college town was usually dead. Kids were sleeping off their hangovers and townies were making up for lost sleep after all the noise complaints they’d had to make.

  Me? I was pounding the pavement. After I got home last night from puking my guts out and making an ass of myself in front of Bianca, I’d stayed home. Dre had gone to a party with Zac, and Shane was with some of his campus Rainbow club friends, and I sat at home catching up on homework. I didn’t want to be around people.

  So I woke up at a ridiculous hour and did what I usually did when being in my head was getting to be too much—I ran.

  My arms pumped, and my running shoes slapped a steady rhythm on the street. I turned down Courtney Road, which took me out of the developed part of town and onto some back roads. Outside the town was mostly farm country, which meant lots of back roads with little traffic that made running ideal, if you got past the smell of manure.

  I rarely changed my route. Routine was what made me comfortable, which was why this whole thing with Bianca and changing my position on the team was making my skin feel too tight on my bones. As I rounded another curve in the road, one mile down, I forced myself to go faster. My mind blanked out, like it always did when I was in the zone. And then it was bliss—the sound of my harsh breaths, the rush of the cool air over my sweat-damp arms, the sound of my heart beating in my ears.

  Around mile three or so, I heard the sound of a car coming up on my left. I moved closer to the shoulder as I ran, so the car could pass with no problems. I was technically running on the wrong side of the road, but cars rarely drove back here, so I didn’t bother.

  Except, it didn’t pass me. A car slowed down, matching my speed. I glanced over and nearly ate gravel as Bianca smiled at me from the driver’s seat of her blue MINI Cooper. I thought about just waving and continuing to run, but I was a weak son of a bitch, and I wanted to see her, especially because we’d left each other in a weird place last night. I slowed my pace until we both came to a stop. With my hands on my hips, I gulped air.

  She rolled down the passenger side window, and I leaned a hand on the frame. Her car was spotless, and a purple crystal hung from her rearview mirror. “Hey. You got home okay?”

  She nodded. “How are you feeling?”

  “Fine.”

  She smiled, but it was strained. “I’m glad.”

  Silence followed her words. I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t one of those guys who played hard to get, mostly because I sucked at being fake. I also didn’t want to keep jumping at her every command, and then beating myself when I saw how one-sided this all was.

  I pushed myself off of her door. “I’m gonna…” I jerked a thumb up the road.

  She bit her lip as she looked out the windshield. “Want to take a drive?”

  “A drive?”

  She turned back, and she didn’t give me a seductive smile. In fact, I could have sworn I saw her lips wobble. “Just a drive. I promise I won’t try to get you to climb the campus clock tower with your body covered in olive oil or anything.”

  I laughed, even as a voice inside my head screamed that I’d do it if she asked me. I was so fucked.

  “Just a little drive? Please?”

  She was asking earnestly, no pouting, no breathy Happy Birthday Mr. President voice. Just a simple request. And despite the reminder of yesterday’s rejection, I opened up the car door and slipped into the passenger seat. “Just a warning, I ran three miles and probably don’t smell so good.”

  She was grinning full out now as I buckled in my seatbelt. “I don’t care,” she said. “Ready?”

  As soon as the click of my seatbelt sounded, she took off like a bat out of hell. With the windows down, the air whipped her long hair around her head. With her large sunglasses over her eyes, she looked like something out of a movie. A movie where kids like me sure as hell didn’t belong. Sitting in my seat should be someone charming and experienced who knew the right things to say and wasn’t already popping wood at just the sight of the sun shining on her dark locks. I was a fucking mess.

  She pressed a button on her dash, and Halsey began blasting from the speakers. Shane fucking loved Halsey, so Badlands had been blaring in my house for months. Bianca sang along to the lyrics, and it took me until the chorus to belt out the lyrics along with her. She threw back her head laughing when I sang the verse about keeping my pretty mouth shut.

  At one point, she turned down the music. “So what’s your major?”

  “Elementary education.”

  Her mouth rounded into an O. “You want to be a teacher?”

  “Summers off!” I whooped.

  She raised an eyebrow.

  “Also I like kids. My cousin has a couple and they are like nieces and nephews to me. I’d rather be down in the basement putting temporary tattoos on my forehead with them than sit at the adult table and discuss grown-up shit.”

  She nodded emphatically. “I officially hate grown-up shit, too.” She held up a finger. “Except I love being able to eat cake for breakfast if I want to and no one can tell me no.”

  “Hmm, yeah, I do like being able to marathon Breaking Bad for an entire weekend without someone nagging at me to do things like ‘get off the couch’ and ‘wash your hair.’”

  She giggled. “Or ‘why aren’t you wearing pants.’”

  “Or ‘why is your hard drive full of porn?’”

  Yep, I said that. Out loud. With my vocal chords.

  Fuck my life.

  Bianca nearly swerved off the road as she burst into a loud cackle, slamming her hand down on her steering wheel. My face was probably bright red, but oh well.

  After nearly taking out a mailbox, Bianca pulled over to the side of the road and gasped a few times as tears streamed down her face. I bit my lip and waited for her to wipe her face with her thumbs. “I need Lavin-proof mascara,” she said, checking out her face in her mirror. “Do they sell that?” She turned big brown eyes to me, and I’d never felt so proud that I could make someone laugh. Of course, this was my role though. I was the funny guy, the friend-zoned comic relief. My life was a movie, and I was Seth Rogen before he lost weight.

  But Bianca wasn’t looking at me the way most girls did. Which was insane. Her face was softer as she sighed and leaned her head back on her headrest. I glanced around at where we were. I’d been so caught up in listening to Halsey and singing off-key that I hadn’t realized we were on the outskirts of town. Surrounding us was a field of tall grass and a slight breeze rippled the water of a nearby pond. No houses were visible, except for a small lean-to that looked like it’d been home to a horse or two at some point.

  Bianca’s voice drew my attention back to her. “And I like this, that I can get in my car and drive with who I want, where I want.” Her head rolled to me. “Don’t you think?”

  I was caught in her gaze. “Yeah. I guess being an adult is okay sometimes.”

  She smiled then. A soft one, and something told me that she didn’t show many people that smile.

  “What’s your major?” I asked.

  She tapped her fingers on the steering wheel. “Hotel and restaurant management.”

  “Oh really? What made you choose that?”

  “I love planning events. I’d love to be a wedding and event coordinator for a hotel.”

  I could picture her doing that, walking around in a little pencil skirt, holding a clipb
oard, glasses low on her nose and her hair in this professional bun. She’d have everyone eating out of her hand. “I bet you’d be good at organizing and delegating,” I said. “You have this aura about you. Makes people want to do what you say and make you happy.”

  She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. “You think?”

  I shrugged. “Or maybe it’s just me. But either way, I think it’s cool that’s what you want to do.”

  “Thanks,” she softly, and I got the impression she really liked that I approved. Or maybe that was wishful thinking on my part.

  Her phone beeped, and her head jerked forward, body immediately tense. She scrambled for her cell on her dashboard, hair framing her face so I couldn’t see her expression.

  Her finger swiped the screen and then froze. A tremor ran down her body, so faint, I thought maybe I imagined it, and then she threw her phone in the back seat and lurched out of the car.

  Alarmed, I surged after her, my seat belt cutting into my neck before I remembered to release it. By the time I made it out of the car, Bianca was halfway through the field, running toward a pond.

  I took off after her, my legs a little shaky from my run and from my nerves. Her anxiety was flowing off of her in waves and seeping in through my pores. And I wanted to make it stop. I wanted her to go back to carefree happy Bianca who laughed about porn. Since I met her, I’d been pretending I didn’t see the dark cloud that loomed over her sometimes. I ignored it because half the time I was more focused on how she was making me feel and what I could do to impress her.

  When I reached her, she was standing alongside the pond, sky blue Chucks in her hand as she dipped her pink-painted toenails in the water. She wore a pair of jeans rolled up to the middle of her calves and a plain navy-blue fitted T-shirt.

  She turned her head as she saw me approach, and a shadow flitted over her face before she worked to clear it. “Hey, sorry—”

  “Don’t apologize,” I said, coming to a stop next to her. “What was that back there? Are you okay?”