The War of All Wars

by J. Eric Booker

  “Hi Shezna, can you patch me through to Pulkovo Airport, please?”

  “Yes, sir, have a great day,” she replied.

  A second later, the phone began to ring again…four rings later, a man’s voice said, “Pulkovo Airport Directory—how can I direct your call?”

  “I need to book some airplane tickets, please,” Baltor said.

  “No problem…please hold,” the man said.

  After listening to thirty seconds of “very dull music,” a woman’s voice said, “Central booking, this is Bolyane, how can I help you?”

  “My name is Mr. Baltor Elysian, and I have two friends of mine that I would like to go on a trip with me to Cancun Mexico, as soon as possible, please.”

  “Do you all have passports, sir?”

  “Umm, I know I do…is that good enough?”

  “No, sir. Please find out from your comrades if they have a valid passport, and call me back at this number, along with their full names and birthdates. Do you have a pen, sir?”

  “I don’t need one.”

  “Very well. My name again is Bolyane, and my direct number is: 782-24323324-432-3354-48742. Are you sure you’re going to remember that number, sir?”

  “Yup, no problem,” he replied. “Talk to you in a minute…”

  After hanging up the one phone, he opened the door and pushed the button “redial.”

  A second later, Nadia answered, “What’s up?”

  “Do you guys have valid passports, and if so, I need the names written on them, as well your birthdays…yeah?”

  “Yes, we do,” she said, “My passport says Nadia Tolkayana Hariechestnak, and my birthday is 12-21-1987. And Reva’s is Reva Alana Varishanoya, and her birthday is 3-17-1989. Grab a pen and write all this down—I will, of course, spell out our names for you when you’re ready…yes?”

  “Sure…hold one second,” he answered before telekinetically flying the pen and notepad that sat on the phone table into his hand. Once so, he said, “Ready.”

  She re-relayed all the technical information.

  Following that, he hung up the one phone, and called the number Bolyane had given him. Three rings later, she picked up the line, and after identifying himself, he relayed all the technical information as well his own, after he had telekinetically retrieved his passport from his coat pocket…finally he mentioned he wanted “first-class seats.”

  Once all was said and done, including relaying all the information on his credit card, nearly thirty minutes later, Bolyane finally said, “Thank you, Mr. Elysian. All your first-class tickets will be here at the main service desk, located in the very middle of the airport terminal, and you will be flying Travel Easy Airlines on Flight 707 at 10 p.m. tonight, Tuesday, June 21st—gate 6A.”

  She cleared her throat twice before adding, “Even though there is a nineteen-hour flight with two different plane changeovers along the way, the first in Amsterdam and the second in Miami, you will be arriving in Cancun at noon on Wednesday the 2nd of June. Please be here at the airport one hour early, so that all security measures can be performed on your person and your luggage—each passenger is allowed two pieces of luggage. Also, you can pick up your airplane tickets at the check-in point, of which you three will be seated together in the first row of our luxurious first-class. So, will there be any other questions for me at this time, sir?”

  “No, ma’am, except I’d like to say, thank you very much,” Baltor said. “You’ve been most helpful…”

  “It was my pleasure, sir, and I hope you have a great stay in Cancun!”

  “Thanks again, and bye.”

  “Bye.”

  With that, Baltor went back to playing his video game for another hour and fifteen minutes—it was then that the phone in his pocket rang.

  Again, it was Reva or Nadia—a second later, he greeted, “Hello?”

  “We’ve thought of one little complication, by going to your hotel room.”

  “Yes?”

  “How are we going to get all of our luggage upstairs, and then back downstairs when it’s time to leave?”

  After snapping his fingers, Baltor suggested, “I’ll tell you what—I’ll come to you. I need to get my own luggage ready anyway, so in about thirty minutes or so, I’ll take a cab up to your apartment. Just so you guys know, we all fly the friendly skies at 10 tonight, but we need to be at the airport by 9. Sound good?”

  “Sounds totally awesome…see you soon!”

  “Okay,” Baltor said—he heard the word, “muah” on the other end of the phone before it hung up.

  After putting it into his front pocket, he stood up, walked over to the hotel’s phone, picked it up, and dialed “0.”

  Two rings later, the phone was answered by a female as she said, “Saints’ Hotel Operator, this is Shezna, how may I help you?”

  “Hi, this is Mr. Elysian again. It seems that I am going to be going on a trip for at least a few days…in twenty minutes time can I please have the assistance of two of your busboys with all my luggage? I have two large suitcases.”

  “Of course, sir,” she responded. “Will there be anything else?”

  “No thank you.”

  “Have a great trip!”

  “Thanks,” he said just before hanging up the phone and making his way for his bedroom—there, he neatly packed everything back up, other than his dirty clothes, and then he made the phone call to the cab company listed in Reva’s directory.

  Twenty minutes later, even from inside his room, he heard a knocking on the staff door. After walking from the bedroom into the entertainment room, he said, “Come in.”

  Two busboys entered—the latter one pushed a cart-on-wheels.

  Baltor greeted with a small smile, “Sorry for not being chivalrous and all, guys, but I’m really in a rush. Can you please get my luggage into the cab that should be in the parking lot in front any minute now? Thanks…”

  “No problem, sir,” they both happily replied—in turn, Baltor pointed them to the luggage in his room, which was then put on the cart. Together they made their way toward the elevator; and once it had arrived at the top floor, they rode it to the ground floor.

  After the elevator door opened and they had exited the elevator, the three made their way for the front doors—already could be seen a cab, parked under the awning.

  Recognizing the name of the cab company written on the side, Baltor informed the two busboys, “That’s it, gentlemen.”

  “No problem,” one replied.

  Once the three stood outside next to the cab, only then did the cabdriver get out of his car, and open the trunk—the busboys were just barely able to squeeze his entire luggage in there, just before closing the trunk.

  After handing over a hundred-ruble bill, Baltor said, “Thanks gentlemen…split that.”

  “Thank you, sir!”

  While nodding his head, Baltor got into the backseat of the cab, and the cab zoomed off.

  Twenty minutes later, they arrived in the parking lot of the girls’ apartment. Even before the cab had a chance to full stop, Reva and Nadia were already running out of the front door at top speed.

  The moment he stood on his feet, the two girls forthwith began hugging and kissing him at the same time; meanwhile, the cabdriver had already popped open the trunk, while looking enviously at all the attention his cab-fare was receiving from these “two most beautiful women!”

  “Chill out for a second ladies, as I need to talk to the cabdriver. Hey sir?”

  “Yes?”

  Baltor said, “I’ll tell you what—instead of unloading my luggage, can you just keep it in stored in the trunk, come back here at 8:30 p.m., and then take us three to Pulkovo airport? I’ll even throw an extra five hundred ruble tip into the total cost for your services at the end.”

  Nodding his head, the cabdriver replied, “No problem…good deal, my comrade. I be back here at 8:30 on the mark—give me time to grab a bite to eat.”

  “Thanks!”

  Just before
the cabdriver climbed into his cab and closed his door, he said, “Do not worry about your luggage…it will be safe, I promise.”

  “I know.”

  While the cab sped off, the party of three entered the apartment, and took a seat on one of the two colorful/cozy loveseats in the living room that faced a twenty-inch television screen, which even had a rainbow-colored flag hanging on the wall behind the couch.

  Baltor had also observed that there were four large suitcases sitting near the front door, and so he inwardly hoped that all this luggage, and them, would be able to squeeze into that tiny cab.

  “So we have fifteen minutes until the cab is back,” Nadia said with a smile. “And we’re all done packing. So what should we talk about?”

  “Hmm, I don’t know,” he replied with a shrug of his shoulders.

  After snapping her fingers one time, Reva suggested, “How about we just watch some television? Our favorite show is on…called ‘Ghost Trackers’!”

  “Okay,” Nadia answered happily.

  “Ghost Trackers?” Baltor asked.

  “Yeah, it’s about the paranormal investigators who travel the world to haunted houses, or insane asylums, or prisons, or anywhere ancient, in order to prove or disprove scientifically whether ghosts exist in these areas.”

  Right after Baltor had said the word “sounds good,” Reva picked up the television remote, clicked it on, and flipped through the channels, until came the channel that read “38—Ghost Trackers. 40 Min Remaining.”

  A split second later, and in split-screen, two ghost-investigators could be seen walking through some prairie fields with seven-foot tall stalks of grass in the middle of the night, while using night-vision goggles/shoulder-mounted cameras in order to see through the greenish-colored darkness—occasionally could be seen a tribal-looking/twenty-foot-tall stone pillar rising from the ground.

  Suddenly, the woman spoke with a whole lot of fear, “Holy cow! Though I didn’t hear a sound other than our footsteps, Harry, I just saw a strangely-dressed tribal man run by between those two pillars way up there to the left! Did you see him, Harry?”

  This man named Harry answered, “No, Sue, I didn’t. I was looking down at the EKG device, which is a very good thing—it originally read 0.05 MHz, but unexpectedly jumped to a whopping 8.4 MHz, but for only a split second in time. Maybe it’s true that this ancient Mayan burial ground is really haunted?”

  Sue replied, “No doubt. I still have goose bumps crawling up and down my spine!”

  “Whoa,” Harry exclaimed unexpectedly, while jutting both his arms up to his shoulder level, and adding, “Something just touched my shoulder—and it felt ice-cold against my skin! Now I really have goose bumps—look at both my arms! My hairs are all standing straight up now!”

  Unexpectedly, a very chilling-to-the-bone voice could clearly be heard whispering—through the television’s speakers—but four words, “Prepare for death, humansss…we are coming to destroy your entire world!”

  In the next moment, both Harry and Sue began to bolt the other direction down the fields at top speed and with great fear clearly visible on their faces—the woman already couldn’t hold back the tears pouring from her eyes, or the mucous that had begun to drip out of her nostrils!

  At the same time, the two girls next to Baltor shuddered uncontrollably, just before they snuggled tight into his sides—he too had felt “a chill that ran up and down his spine,” but he retained his “poker face…”

  Nearly twenty seconds after the two investigators had begun to run, Sue tripped on the ground, screaming out in pain, “Ow—my knee!”

  By this time, Harry had already returned, just before frantically asking, “Can you still walk, or should I carry you back to the Jeep?”

  “Carry me—I hurt my knee,” she responded. Wasting no time, he quickly picked her up before making his way through the fields…

  Nearly five minutes later, thankfully without any other noises than the sounds of his feet-shuffling, they made it back to the Jeep that sat on the near side of a small dirt road—on the far side stood a large grouping of dense, jungle trees.

  It was then and there that the silence was broken, as Sue revealed, “I’m okay. I can stand on my one good foot now—thanks.”

  By this time Harry had already gently set her down against the side of the car, before he pulled his set of keys out of his pocket—just as he was about to insert the car key into the passenger’s side door, most unexpectedly a television commercial began.

  “Wow.” The girls sighed in unison.

  Nadia added, “That was the craziest episode I’ve ever seen…and that voice saying that we humans need to prepare for death? Oh my God! I almost freaked out.”

  Baltor laughed nonchalantly, “Relax girls…everything will be okay. You’ve just got to have faith that everything will work out in the end, no matter the bleak situations you might be facing—that’s my philosophy in life.”

  Just then, they all heard a honking sound coming from outside.

  “And there’s the proof of my words. It’s time to go!” he said before standing up to his feet.

  He grabbed two of the suitcases, and made his way outside toward the cab. After the girls had each grabbed a suitcase and exited the apartment, Reva locked the front door. Both girls joined him at the cab…not all of the luggage fit in the trunk, and so Baltor carried one of his suitcases in his lap in the front seat.

  Ten minutes later, they arrived at the semi-busy airport—after paying the cabbie, they checked themselves in, as well their luggage, before going through the security checkpoint, which not contained metal detectors, yet a half-dozen security officers armed with pistols and nightsticks.

  Nearly seven minutes later, the three arrived at gate 6A. Upon checking their tickets in at the booth with the friendly stewardess, they took a seat in the airport lobby, and waited for their flight.

  Not even twenty seconds had passed before Nadia asked, “So…how long do you want to stay in Mexico?”

  After cocking his head to the side, he answered, “I don’t know…no more than a day or two. My personal goal is to stand on every continent before our vacation’s up—even if it’s for only a minute.”

  The girls immediately began to laugh. Reva was the next to say, “That’s going to be a very tough goal, considering there are seven continents on this planet, five days more of vacation when you consider this day to be the first, and a trillion things to see along the way.”

  “Hmm,” he hummed, “I wish we had more time.”

  “Me too,” Nadia said wholeheartedly.

  After delivering a smug smile, Reva added, “Well, our work is cut out a little for us.”

  “How so?” he asked.

  She answered, “There are seven continents on this world. You come from the United States, so that takes North America out of the equation—and you are right now in Russia, which takes both Europe and Asia out of the equation, so that’s three continents already accomplished. When you consider that we’re going to Mexico, which is in Central America, that leaves—“

  Before she could finish, however, Nadia interrupted with a light laugh, “Hold on, Reva…there is no continent called Central America—only north and south. And thus, Mexico is a part of North America.”

  “Oops,” Reva came back, “my mistake. Well, okay, we’ve still got three continents covered, which leaves four left for four days—Africa, Antarctica, Australia and South America. Right?”

  “Right,” he answered with a smile and a nod.

  Nadia asked, “So which continent should we hit next?”

  He answered, “I don’t know yet…we’ve got plenty of time to figure that out…right?”

  “Right,” Reva answered.

  Just then, their stewardess spoke over the intercom, “Flight 707 bound for Amsterdam is now boarding passengers. Rows one through eight, please step to the terminal doors now—again, rows one through eight on Flight 707 bound for Amsterdam, please board now.”

/>   He looked at each of the other girls in turn, before he extended his elbows out to them, while asking, “Ready, ladies—we’re row one?”

  Each grabbing an elbow, the girls answered, “Yes, sir!”

  With that, they simultaneously rose to their feet—each girl grabbed their purses off the seats. They went to the boarding desk, checked their tickets in with the stewardess who never stopped smiling, and boarded the plane.

  Once standing inside the first-class area, they saw three more stewardesses standing idly by and chatting with each other.

  After the nearest female stewardess had double-checked their first-class tickets, she escorted her three guests to their seats, which had a good ten feet of legroom.

  Once they were seated, she greeted with a smile, “My name is Monique, and I will be your personal stewardess for our voyage. Would any of you like a hot-towel, champagne, or any other type of beverage to begin?”

  “No thanks,” they all responded concurrently, which caused Reva and Nadia to giggle.

  After delivering another smile, Monique said, “No problem—dinner will be served thirty minutes after takeoff. Thank you for choosing Travel Easy Airlines, and if you need anything at all, please don’t hesitate to ask me.”

  “Thanks….”

  After stretching his hands and arms out—followed by a purposeful yawn—Baltor suggested, “If I was you, I would consider these plane rides as our hotel/sleeping arrangements…that’s the only way this trip is going to work out in the end. Know what I mean?”

  “Yes,” they both answered—Reva added right away, “sir! We know what you mean. One thing you need to consider, Baltor, is the possibility that there could be delays with air flights, for one reason or another, of which there are many-many reasons. So, if I was you, I wouldn’t get your hopes up too much that we’re going to be able to visit every single continent!”

  “What do you mean, delays?”

  “Well,” she answered, “consider the volcano in Iceland that erupted yet again but a couple days ago? It stranded hundreds of thousands of people, especially in Europe, and stopped approximately ninety-three thousand flights. Or consider the major earthquakes in Chile, Haiti and China a few years, which overall I think, killed a few hundred thousand people? Or how about the tsunami that killed—in one shot—at least one hundred and fifty thousand people around six years ago? Oh yeah, on a criminal note, how about all the terror—” Realizing she was on a plane, she abruptly switched to whispering as she said, “ists who like to hijack and fly jets like this into skyscrapers filled with thousands of people?”