That wasn’t to say that she still didn’t want what Melanie had with Tyler and Alex had with Rebecca, but she needed to get past fixating on having a husband and a family. Life was passing her by, and it was time for her to stop sitting on the sidelines.
Feeling better than she had since hearing the news of Connor’s imminent arrival, Adrianne relaxed back in the armchair and sipped the last of her coffee. “I guess we should probably stop somewhere and pick up something for Jordan. I’ve got him a couple things, but I have no idea if he will actually like them. Buying for a teenage boy is more challenging than I thought it would be.”
Melanie laughed. “Tell me about it. And I’ve even been asking Tyler and Ryan for some help. It would’ve been so much easier if Jordan had been a girl.”
“Speaking of a girl, I wonder if Alex and Rebecca will have any more kids.”
Melanie shrugged. “I have no idea, but that would be quite the age gap if they decided to.”
“I might not be the only one looking for a house if that should happen. The mansion isn’t really set up for a growing family.”
“Well, with you moving out, Alex might begin to think of putting his plan for the mansion in motion sooner rather than later.”
“If he does that, what are you going to do?”
Melanie grinned. “Well, as long as my sister buys a house with more than one room, maybe I can talk her into letting me stay with her for a while.”
Adrianne laughed. “So that’s why you’re not trying to discourage me from looking for a place of my own.”
“I must confess, I really do hope that Tyler proposes sometime soon.”
Adrianne shifted in her chair, leaning forward to place her mug on the table. “Have you guys talked much about marriage yet?”
Melanie gazed out the window, her expression thoughtful. “We’ve touched on it. I don’t know if Tyler’s a bit gun shy since he’s already been down that path once before. He doesn’t object when the subject comes up—usually introduced by something his mother says in a phone conversation with me—but he never brings it up on his own.”
Adrianne really hoped that Tyler wasn’t getting cold feet when it came to committing to Melanie. As she’d watched the two of them together, she had seen a relationship that she hoped to have some day. It seemed like they had a lot of fun, and yet at the same time, their connection seemed to hold a depth of emotion that Adrianne hadn’t experienced before in any of her relationships.
Once Melanie finished her coffee, they left the cozy atmosphere of the coffee shop and ventured back out into the crisp winter morning. After a bit of discussion, they headed to a nearby mall in hopes of finding a store that would have something they could buy for Jordan. The crowds weren’t as bad as Adrianne had been anticipating, so they were able to find a few more things for Jordan without having to hassle the tensions of frantic shoppers. As it turned out, neither of them could resist picking up just a few more things for several people on their Christmas lists.
When they returned to the house shortly before supper, they both had armfuls of bags to carry up to their rooms, concealing gifts to be wrapped and then placed under the large Christmas tree in the living room. With Christmas just two days away, the tree already had a ton of presents under its branches. Adrianne didn’t doubt that a good chunk of them were for Jordan. As the only grandchild and nephew, he was the focal point of most of their Christmas shopping lists.
Dinner was the perfect winter’s night meal. Alex had apparently decided it was his turn to cook, and he’d made a big pot of chili. Tyler and Ryan showed up shortly after Adrianne had gotten back to the house with Melanie. Thankfully, there were enough people present that she didn’t find the meal terribly awkward even with Connor’s presence.
She didn’t contribute much to the conversation around the table, but that really wasn’t anything new. Adrianne preferred to just listen while she ate, answering only if comments were directed at her specifically. Thankfully, none of those comments came from Connor. But it was a bit disconcerting to find his gaze on her whenever she happened to look around the table. She didn’t know if he was waiting for her to mention their past, but he’d once known her well enough to know that was something she would never discuss in a situation like this.
Maybe if she had a different type of personality and had been stronger and more secure in who she was, Adrianne might have stood up and let them all know exactly what type of person Connor really was. They had been friends, but he had proven to her in one deeply painful moment that she was the only one who had viewed them that way. He’d taken what he needed from her and then rejected her.
She’d been sick the day they’d assigned partners for the project in their English class. Connor had obviously been absent as well because when they’d both come back to school the next day, the teacher told them they were partners for the duration of the project. During the time they’d spent together, Adrianne had found herself relaxing as they’d found things they had in common beyond just the project. Though she had a bit of a crush on him, Adrianne had been happy to consider him her friend. Until the day she’d thought that perhaps they could have friendship and more.
Connor hadn’t agreed and had communicated that to her in the most painful way.
He taught her a valuable lesson that day, one she wasn’t ever going to be able to forget. But hopefully, at some point in her future, she might learn to love and trust another man. She wasn’t quite ready to give up that dream, even if she was going to move on to her other dreams.
~*~
Connor looked across the table at Adrianne, watching as she ate. She seemed aware of the conversation going on around her, but she didn’t participate. Part of him was waiting for someone to pick up on the tension between the two of them and ask what was going on. But another part of him was hoping that nobody would notice. Maybe this was just the way Adrianne usually was. Maybe her quiet demeanor had nothing to do with him. But while she seemed to have accepted his presence there, he wasn’t so sure about Melanie.
Their interaction at the breakfast table made Connor fairly certain that Adrianne had shared what had gone on between them with her sister. Melanie’s manner towards him had changed after that. The night before, she been friendly and curious about his life, asking questions and engaging him in conversation. But now that she was aware of the past he shared with her sister, she’d been anything but friendly.
Connor had noticed Alex looking more at Melanie than at Adrianne. He was no doubt wondering about the change in his sister’s interactions with Connor. Unfortunately, that explanation would lead back to the past which was a place he really didn’t want to revisit.
He still had a hard time reconciling the woman seated across from him with the girl he’d known in high school. When he’d been assigned as her partner for the project in their English class, Connor had been anything but thrilled. At first, he’d figured the only positive thing about the partnership was that she was smart and got good grades in that class so they’d ace the assignment. He’d gone out of his way to make sure that the places they met to work on the project weren’t anywhere near his usual haunts. No way had he wanted his friends to see them hanging out. It had been bad enough that he had to take a class that was mainly made up of juniors when he was a senior.
Though they’d met together several times to work on the project, there was no doubt that she had done the majority of the work. She’d been a bit shy back then, but they’d had previous interactions because of his friendship with Alex. So while they hadn’t been total strangers as they worked on the project, they’d also not been friends. What had surprised him, however, was that as they’d spent time together, he’d discovered that they had several things in common.
They both loved sci-fi movies over any other genre, and they’d discovered that they each liked to watch disaster movies. When they’d each watched the same movie the night before they’d met to work on the project, they’d ended up spending more time discu
ssing the movie than their assignment. They’d picked apart the plot and the acting, laughing together if it was a particularly bad disaster flick.
Connor hadn’t planned to strike up a friendship with Adrianne, but they’d ended up with one nonetheless. He’d suddenly found himself talking to her about things he didn’t share with anyone else, and he had a feeling it was the same for her. At the time, Connor hadn’t known what that meant. He never viewed her as girlfriend material because…well, he was the star quarterback for the football team. There were expectations of the type of girl he’d date. A cheerleader, at the very least. Not the slightly nerdy, overweight girl with frizzy hair and glasses.
He wasn’t proud of that now, but back then he’d thought he had a certain image to uphold as a jock at their high school. When it had become apparent that Adrianne wanted something more than friendship from him, Connor had felt the need to make sure she understood that could never, ever happen.
Though he felt bad almost immediately after he’d said what he did to her, it wasn’t until a day or two later that he’d felt her absence more keenly than he’d thought possible. He found himself thinking about what he wanted to tell her after watching something on television only to realize he no longer had that privilege. He didn’t laugh with anyone like he’d laughed with her.
His foolish pride had cost him more than he’d realized until it was too late. And now she was back in his life, within arm’s reach, but Connor knew that she wasn’t about to offer him a second chance. Not that he deserved one.
Aside from still wearing glasses, Adrianne was none of the things that she’d been in high school. She had thinned out some over the years, and her skin had cleared up. In fact, Adrianne Thorpe had grown up to be a very beautiful woman. Her blonde hair was no longer curly in the frizzy sort of way it had been in high school. Instead, it hung in a straight satiny curtain down her shoulders. Behind her glasses, her blue eyes were large and framed by dark eyelashes.
Connor didn’t know what to make of the situation that he found himself in. If Adrianne had been anyone else, he might have considered asking her out on a date.
He was curious if they still had the things in common they once did. And he wanted to know even more about her life now. But without a doubt, she would brush him off now like he’d brushed her off back then.
Connor winced a bit at the thought. He’d done more than brush her off. He’d made sure that she knew in no uncertain terms that he would never ever, even if she was the last female on the planet, be interested in going out with her. Even now, he could still see her face as he’d said those hurtful words to her. She’d gone pale, her mouth opening then snapping shut, her chin quivering as he’d shut her down. Her eyes had gotten wide, and a single tear had tracked down her cheek before she’d given him one shaky nod and turned to walk away. He had lived with that memory a long time, and now he had the opportunity to apologize to Adrianne for how he’d hurt her.
The big question was whether or not she would forgive him. And Connor knew that he had no one but himself to blame if she chose not to.
For the first time in a long time, Connor found himself really excited for Christmas. In the past few years, if he’d been able to make it home at all, it had been just him, Rebecca, and Jordan for Christmas. This year, however, they were part of a larger family. It was a type of Christmas that Connor wished they could have had with their own family. Thankfully, the Thorpes seemed more than willing to embrace everyone who wanted to be part of their holiday gathering.
As they gathered together Christmas Eve to attend church, he noticed that while Tyler Harris was there, Ryan McFadden, who had been present at a few of their meals, was not. When asked, Tyler mentioned that Ryan had left earlier that day to drive home to Winnipeg to spend Christmas with his family.
Adrianne stood with Melanie as they waited for everyone to gather so they could leave for the church service. She wore a dark green sweater dress that ended a few inches above her knee-high black boots. Though it wasn’t tight, it fit her curves in a way that Connor had a hard time ignoring. While she had lost weight since her teen years, Adrianne was by no stretch of the imagination a thin woman. And that was just fine with Connor. The irony did not escape him that Adrianne had turned into the exact type of woman he was attracted to. But what made her even more attractive was the memory of the connection they’d had before that had had nothing to do with how either of them had looked.
Connor found himself between Rebecca and Tyler when they seated themselves in the pew of the church where Tyler and Melanie attended. Adrianne sat on the far side of Melanie, who, of course, was seated beside Tyler. Connor knew that it was ridiculous for him to even want to be close to Adrianne. Something told him he’d had his one chance, and he’d blown it.
Instead of focusing on Adrianne, Connor tried to keep his attention on the Christmas Eve service. It had been awhile since he’d been in a church. The jobs he was sent on often meant he was in areas where Christian churches were not readily available. If he was able to, he would try to watch live streaming services on the internet. But more often than not, he was not in a situation that allowed for that either. So he appreciated being back in church and singing the familiar Christmas carols with the rest of the people gathered there.
As the congregation stood for the last song of the service, children came to the end of each row to hand out candles, then adults came along to light the candle of the person standing next to the aisle. As Rebecca tipped her candle toward his, they shared a smile in the flickering light.
Standing in the sanctuary with a flickering candle in his hands, Connor closed his eyes and joined those around him as they sang Silent Night. He let the peacefulness and the beauty of the moment wash over him, and for a short time, he was able to forget the past and all the pain and ugliness that it held. Not just the time with Adrianne, but so much of what he’d seen and done in more recent years weighed heavily on him.
He felt an arm slipped through his and glanced over to see Rebecca looking up at him. She gave him another smile then pressed her head to his shoulder. Connor was grateful that they were once again together as a family. He didn’t think Rebecca realized just how close he’d come on multiple occasions to not returning to her. He’d chosen to downplay the danger of his work, so he was grateful now that he wouldn’t have to lie to her anymore about what he was doing.
After the service was over, they all returned to the big house where he knew food awaited them. Adrianne’s mother and father had come over earlier in the day, and Mrs. Thorpe had spent a good chunk of time in the kitchen with Rebecca, Melanie, and Adrianne. The aromas that had drifted through the house had been enough to set his stomach growling. He looked forward to being able to eat his fill when they returned from the service.
It wasn’t until they were all gathered around filling up their plates before taking them into the living room where the Christmas tree was, that he heard Adrianne laugh. Connor turned to see a smile on her face as she reacted to something Tyler said. He paused momentarily, the fork for the roast beef suspended over the platter as he took in the sight of a smile—a real, honest-to-goodness smile—on Adrianne’s face.
“Are you not sure if you want the beef?” Jordan’s voice jarred him from his stupor, and he quickly looked down at the platter and jabbed the fork into a piece before dumping it on his plate.
“Just trying to decide if I should leave any for the rest of you,” Connor replied, hoping Jordan hadn’t realized who he was staring at.
“You have to leave some for me. I’m a growing boy.” Jordan backed up his words by taking two large slices of the roast beef and plunking them on his plate. “I guess when a guy gets as old as you, he has to watch what he eats, or he’ll end up all dumpy and out of shape.”
“Old as me? I think I’m going to have to challenge you to prove that my age has not lessened my ability to whip your butt.”
“Bring it on, old man. Bring it on,” Jordan jeered at him.
As they settled down in the living room with their plates of food, Connor found himself seated next to Tyler, but Adrianne was right in his line of sight as she sat on the loveseat with Melanie. Christmas music played around them, and a fire crackled in the fireplace. There was a huge tree in front of the window that Jordan had informed him he had helped to decorate. Connor was disappointed that he hadn’t been there for that. Hopefully, there would be many more Christmases when all of them could enjoy preparations together.
3
The sudden bouncing of her bed drew Adrianne from a deep sleep. Keeping her eyes tightly shut, she curled on onto her side and pulled the covers up to her ears. It was nice and warm in the cocoon of her bed, and she was in no hurry to leave it.
“Merry Christmas, Annie,” Melanie sang out as she continued to bounce on the bed. “It’s time to get up so we can open our stockings.”
Adrianne loved Christmas as much as the next person, but she didn’t quite have the childhood excitement that propelled her to scramble from the bed and go in search of the stockings her mother would’ve filled the night before. She cracked an eye open to see the clock on her nightstand.
“It’s only eight o’clock,” Adrianne moaned. “I don’t need to get up yet.”
When Melanie began to bounce again, Adrianne pulled her arm from under the covers and began swatting at the air behind her, hoping to land at least one slap on her sister.
“Don’t be such a Grinch. It’s our first Christmas with Jordan. Let’s get up and open our stockings with him.” She gave a couple more good bounces on the mattress.
Adrianne rolled over onto her back and glared at Melanie. “At eight o’clock? Surely Jordan would be willing to wait until at least nine. Aren’t teenagers supposed to want to sleep all the time?”
Beauty from Ashes: A Christian Romance (BlackThorpe Security Book 5) Page 3