Sunshine in the Delta: A Novel

by Erica M. Sandifer

  “No worries about no trouble, Mama. Not around here.”

  Chapter 13

  Big Mama sent us a post card tellin’ us she was handling some business, and she was gon’ be gone a few more weeks. I missed bein’ in the country, but I was loving workin’ in Greenwood. Mrs. Baker was real sweet to me. It was only gettin’ hotter and hotter, so them boys was always wantin’ to play outside. Hard as hell, tryna keep watch on ’em and work. Mrs. Nellie barely watched them boys like I asked her, so I begged ’em to be good and not go outside when I wasn’t there. Reena was gettin’ ready for school, so she was workin’ almost every day. We barely had time to even talk to each other how we usually done. She always was so tired.

  “Ain’t you get a scholarship? Why you workin’ so hard?” I asked her. I just had to be nosey.

  “I like nice thangs, Neeyla Jean. You know that.”

  “I reckon. You need you some rest. I miss talkin’ up late night ’bout all your boyfriends.”

  We both burst out to laughin’ while we both was gettin’ ready for work.

  “We goin’ back to the country soon now, so make sure we go out one last time before,” I said.

  “We is, Neeyla!”

  I kissed them boys and ran off. I was at work for ’bout two hours until the phone rang.

  “Baker residence.”

  “Yes, is Miss Neeyla Jean workin’?”

  “Yes, this me.”

  That voice sounded so familiar, comin’ from over the phone.

  “Who is this?” I asked.

  “This yo’ Uncle Sammy. Get down to the house now. Somethin’ real bad done happened.”

  I slammed the phone down and ran to Mrs. Baker’s room.

  “Mrs. Baker, I gotta go! My uncle called here screamin’, tellin’ me somethin’ bad done happened.”

  “Go on. Come on back tomorrow.”

  I ran home as fast as I could, like I was in a race. Everybody was sittin’ in the livin’ room, just cryin’ and carryin’ on.

  “What happened? Why all y’all cryin’?” I asked.

  I looked around and saw my li’l brothers cryin’, and they was shook up the worst.

  “Where is Johnny Boy? Why he ain’t in here? Tell me why all y’all cryin’!”

  Reena came and snatched me to her room and sat me down.

  “Neeyla Jean, Johnny Boy’s dead.”

  Chapter 14

  Uncle Sammy woke me up with some cold water on my face. I jumped up, and I could barely breathe. He said I’d passed out, but I didn’t know. Uncle Sammy called Archibald in the room.

  “Get in here, Archie! Come and tell your sister what happened today.”

  Archie came, buckin’ his eyes, lookin’ shook up and crazy. He could barely even talk.

  “He got ran over by a train. Cut him in half.”

  I must’ve passed out again, ’cause I woke up in Big Mama’s bed in a cold sweat. I really couldn’t remember where I was last, and how I got there. I reckon they toted my heavy ass to the car, and drove me back out there to Money. Carrie was sittin’ next to me with a real crazy look, forehead all wrinkled and whatnot. She was lookin’ guilty, lookin’ like she been fightin’ a ghost or her own demons. She just sat there with sweat runnin’ off her face like she been in the fields all day. I was lookin’ around.

  “They’s still down to Sammy’s, and comin’ here in the morning. You ain’t well enough to be lookin’ after no kids, and I gotta get out here to the fields ’cause Jabo done ran off again.”

  I figured it was ’bout time she knew where her kids were. My li’l brother was dead, chopped in half, and all she cared ’bout was some damn fields.

  “Damn them fields! My brother done got killed down there in Greenwood, and them kids still there?”

  “They’s all right, Neeyla Jean. I know what happened. That’s why Jabo ran off. He blamin’ me.”

  I knew deep in my heart that it was her fault, but I couldn’t help but blame myself. I was tryna be selfish and work, when I should’ve been watchin’ my brothers.

  “Just tell me what happened, Carrie,” I said.

  She went on, tellin’ me how the boys were tryna sneak up behind Poe over them train tracks to Baptist town. They were crawlin’ under a train so Poe wouldn’t know they were behind him. All the boys had got under but Johnny Boy. When it was his turn, the train jerked off, cutting his li’l body in two. I just looked at Carrie with tears rolling down my face. I never seen her show no feelings. Even when Jabo was whooping her ass, she still wouldn’t cry. She just stood there and took them licks like a man. Guess she was takin’ her baby’s death like a man, too.

  The room just got quiet. All I could see were the images in my head, bit by bit, of what happened. Scared me halfway to death. And what’s even scarier was that I dreamed somebody died two nights before the accident happened. Maybe I could have done somethin’ to stop it. Maybe that was a warning from God up in heaven. I don’t know. Johnny Boy was gon’ be five in July. I’m guessin’ my God wanted him in heaven. I know the Lord knows best, so I just tried my best to stay calm.

  Big Mama came on back once the word got around to her, and finally the kids came on back out to the country. They was real shook up, and I had to sleep in the bed with all of ’em. I guess they was havin’ nightmares ’bout it. Even more, the children’s faces showed their grief and sadness. I could barely get ’em to eat. It was the roughest time of my life, in all my fourteen years of livin’. I knew if I made it through this, I could make it through anything. I was glad that Big Mama was back. She wasn’t tendin’ to the fields as she usually did. She was helpin’ me keep a watch on the kids, and checking on me from time to time. Shame somethin’ bad had to happen for us to act like a family.

  Chapter 15

  We had his funeral on a rainy Saturday at the church down the Money Road. Carrie cried that day. She took my tears from me ’cause I sure couldn’t cry. I didn’t have no tears left. I guess Jabo couldn’t handle it, ’cause his dark-skinned ass didn’t even show up. Who knows. He ’bout was somewhere drunk, cryin’, and lookin’ real ugly like he always been.

  The mud was thick and somber on the ground when we was burying Johnny Boy. Everybody had mud up to they ankles, like we was fightin’ over there in the war. We had to put him in a small, pine box since my folks couldn’t afford the money for a real casket. It made me sick to my stomach that he was gon’ be bunched up in that tiny box, all cold in the hard, clay earth. It hurt my heart to even think ’bout it, let alone watch.

  I looked over there at Poe, and he was lookin’ so sad. His eyes was bloodshot, like he’d been cryin’. He took his hat off when they started puttin’ my li’l brother in the ground. Reena held my hand. She was cryin’, too. Poe looked over at me. I saw one tear fall from them bloodshot eyes of his. He looked at me and he looked so sad. His eyes was tellin’ me how sorry he was ’bout the whole thing. The sorrow in his eyes was sadness not only for Johnny Boy’s death, but for not caring ’bout his family.

  Chapter 16

  Thangs got a li’l easier on me when Johnny Boy got killed. Carrie was startin’ to help look after her own babies while I was gon’ go back to work for the Bakers. After Johnny Boy got killed, I told Mrs. Baker what was goin’ on, so she gave me a few weeks off to get myself together. I had moved back out to the country, and if I was gon’ make it to work on time, I was gon’ have to leave and walk to work the day before if I wanted to make it on time. I begged for Jabo to let me use his truck to go to town for work. That drunk fool just looked at me. He didn’t say yes and he didn’t say no. There I stood, starin’ back at him like I’d lost my mind.

  Carrie yelled out from the kitchen, “Go on, girl! You can use that damn truck!”

  Jabo turned around and looked at Carrie. Oh no, I done started some blank, I thought to myself.

  “How in the hell you gon’ tell her what she can do with my truck? That’s my damn truck.”

  “That girl tryna make her some money and a bet
ter livin’.”

  Jabo just looked at Carrie, and I looked at him. I thought for sure he was gon’ rise up and slap her teeth out for talkin’ back, but he didn’t that time. I just figured that he had to be sober that time, ’cause any other time it would’ve been a royal boxing match. I guess Carrie was shocked, too, ’cause I could read her body language. She was preparin’ to defend herself against what had become a common part of her life. So I didn’t waste any time standin’ around either. I soon grabbed them keys and skipped out the door before he changed his mind.

  I remembered just then, all anxious and excited, that it was summertime, and Henry was gon’ be home for the whole summer. This kinda made me nervous, ’cause I’d realized my crazy mind had some feelings for a white boy. He was all I could think ’bout since I left that night and made that country dinner for the Baker family. I hadn’t seen him since. I was wonderin’ if he was still gon’ be mean to me, like he always teasin’ at me.

  It took every bit of fifteen minutes to get to Greenwood. This was the longest fifteen minutes of my life. I had so many thangs goin’ through my head that whole time, like how I was gon’ act when I saw him. I was wonderin’ how he was gon’ act. I was wishing he would go on and tell me how much he was in love with me. I knew he was. The way he been starin’ all up in my face. Eyes don’t lie. It was 3:05 p.m. on the dot when I stepped up on the Baker’s porch. I rang the doorbell, and to my surprise, some li’l pretty white girl answered the door.

  “Good afternoon, ma’am, is Mrs. Baker home?” I asked.

  This white girl was dressed all cute. She was so small and petite, and fancy as hell. She looked at me with some kinda look. It wasn’t mean and it wasn’t nice. I guess she was wonderin’ what in the hell some nigger gal was doin’, standin’ on Mrs. Baker’s porch asking to see her. I reckon the girl had to gather her thoughts ’bout what she was wantin’ to say to me, so it was takin’ her forever to answer. She must’ve fallen asleep in broad daylight.

  “Are you Neeyla? If so, I got some work for you to do,” she said finally.

  I just looked at her. How in the hell she gon’ try to give me some orders at somebody’s house that don’t even belong to her? She don’t know me, and I damn sure don’t know her, I thought to myself. But I knew I had to do it. Before I could respond, she turned around in her li’l, yellow cocktail dress and her li’l, cute, white shoes, and sped off to tell me what she wanted me to do. I could tell this heifer was somethin’ else. I was walkin’ behind her to see just what she wanted me to do. Soon as we turned the corner through the dining room to get to the kitchen, there was Henry.

  All them butterflies just let loose in my stomach like they wanted to be set free.

  “Baby, what time are the guests arriving?” the girl said as she leaned over and kissed Henry’s cheek.

  “About six, honey,” he replied.

  He grabbed her waistline and gave her a hug. I was just standin’ there, lookin’ with a blank stare. The whole time he was hugging this girl, he was lookin’ at me from under his blue eyes like he always did. To my surprise, Henry had him a li’l girlfriend. I knew better, anyways. I know I ain’t had no chance. That was a no-no. If anybody even thought what I was thinkin’ in my head, they was sure to find me on one of them trees out there, swingin’ by my neck in the front yard for everyone to see.

  Henry’s new girlfriend walked on in the kitchen. It was two other maids in the kitchen in fancy uniforms, cookin’ up a storm. Food was laid all out on platters, and there was flowers lined up on the counter, so pretty and yellow. I was wonderin’ what in the hell was goin’ on.

  “We’re havin’ an engagement party for Henry and me today in the backyard,” she explained. “Join in with these ladies. Help ’em bring all of these here things outside, and line ’em on the table. One table is for food, and the other table is for gifts.”

  Well, I’ll be damned. Not only did Henry have a girlfriend, this joker was ’bout to get married! Damn shame. They had all kinds of good food—meatballs, li’l sandwiches, all fancy on silver platters, and big pitchers of that good lemonade. The backyard was dressed up so pretty! The chairs was, and the tables. They even had a white tent set up with that white carpet paper under it. It was so pretty. I was just standin’ there in amazement. The yellow flowers just made everything come together. Then I looked up and saw Mrs. Baker dressed up in all white.

  I skipped on around the yard so I could go talk to her. I walked up to tell Mrs. Baker how much I missed bein’ gone, but she told me to get back to the kitchen and that she would be right in there. Kinda made me sad that Mrs. Baker rushed me off like that. I guess she was puttin’ on for them other white ladies. Here they was, all dressed up in they yellow and white, all fancy. Guess Mrs. Baker was scared I was gon’ get some nigger on her white suit.

  “Yes, ma’am,” I said.

  I looked Mrs. Baker dead in her eyes to let her know I knew what she was doin’. I did as she said. I went back to the kitchen to pretend like I was doin’ somethin’. Them other two maids was just starin’ at me. I asked they asses did they have an eye problem? Them ladies was shocked, I reckon, ’cause they bucked they eyes at me.

  “Well, excuse you, young lady!” said one of the older heifers, who’d had the guts to speak up. “Ain’t yo’ mama ever teach you manners, gal?”

  “Ain’t yo’ mammy ever teach you not to stare? That there is rude as hell!” I said before she could even finish the last word of her sentence.

  This maid was lookin’ like she was ’bout forty, but she was actin’ like she was eighty, and the other maid wasn’t too much older than me. She looked like she was ’bout twenty. I was talkin’ to her, too, ’cause if she was gon’ be starin’, she might as well just talked.

  “I’m gon’ pray for you, child. You got some demons up in you,” she said.

  “We all do.”

  I reckon she agreed, ’cause she ain’t said nothin’ else. They turned back around and finished workin’ like they was supposed to been in the first place. I looked over in the back door in the kitchen and there I saw some feathers, dancin’ all up in the window. There come Mrs. Baker’s fancy ass, tramplin’ through the door.

  See, Mrs. Baker was a pretty old lady. She just was a bit heavy. Not real heavy, but round like a buttermilk biscuit. Her hair was thick and stopped right there at her jawbone. She wasn’t blond like most white ladies; she had the darkest brown hair, and it looked soft, like real silk.

  “Neeyla Jean, go to my room, and I’ll be there in two minutes.”

  I just knew Mrs. Baker was puttin’ on for these white folks. She never talked to me like that. I just said “yes, ma’am” how I always did, and went on. Made thangs a lot easier. I got halfway down the hallway and guess who I run into. Henry’s blue-eyed ass. I felt my heart come up through my throat.

  “Ain’t you supposed to be workin’, girl?” he said in the rudest voice ever.

  “Why you always messin’ with me?” I said. “Always bein’ mean. You know I work hard for Mrs. Baker here, so why you nosin’ all up in my business?”

  “’Cause I can.”

  This boy had some nerve! But I bet he was thinkin’ the same thing. I must done lost it! What they gon’ do to a maid talkin’ back to her boss man? Not a damn thing. ’Cause I knew this white boy was just as in love with me as I was in love with him.

  “You are a pretty nigger, and I been watchin’ you.”

  I stared at Henry’s lips as each word fell out of his mouth.

  “I know,” I said.

  By that time Mrs. Baker rolled herself around the corner, lookin’ all lost. Henry started actin’ like he was tellin’ me to get somethin’ from the kitchen. So hell, I played along. I didn’t want Mrs. Baker to know I liked Henry. I didn’t want her to start treatin’ me different. But hell, maybe she had to. All them white ladies she had to impress. Funny how Henry was tryna tell me to do somethin’, and Mrs. Baker comin’ in, tellin’ him what to do.

  “He
nry, go out there with your future missus! I can’t believe you’re not out there joining in the festivities with her, like a husband should. Get on out there!”

  I put my head down and chuckled so deep. ’Bout time somebody put Henry in his place, always thinkin’ he was all big and bad and tough! Bastard.

  Chapter 17

  I reckon I knew who his wife-to-be really was, so he could go ahead and keep on pretendin’ for them white folks. Mrs. Baker grabbed my arm and pulled me into the room with all the nice china.

  “Now you know I didn’t mean to treat you bad, but you know how things are. I can’t be nice to you when they are around,” she said to me.

  I always respected Mrs. Baker, but I didn’t know if I could keep it after this.

  “Why you can’t be nice to me when they around? I’m human just like they is.”

  Mrs. Baker just looked at me with a real guilty look.

  “Just ’cause I’m black don’t mean you gotta treat me like dirt.”

  I guess I shocked Mrs. Baker, ’cause she couldn’t say nothin’, but I was right. I had to set her straight ’cause there was no use in her changing her feelings ’bout me now. We was family now. I got up and hugged Mrs. Baker and asked her what else she needed me to do. Mrs. Baker just looked in my eyes and smiled.

  “Neeyla Jean, you know why I let you get away with your smart mouth?”

  “No, ma’am. Why is that, Mrs. Baker?” I replied, smilin’, my cheeks sore.

  “You are like the daughter I never had. You are such a pretty young lady, and you are smart.”

  “And this is the closest thing to a real family I got,” I said, “so I reckon we perfect for each other.”

  Chapter 18

  I stood in the backdoor and watched as Henry put his arm around his wife-to-be, with her tiny li’l waist, and danced along to the band’s singer Mrs. Baker probably spent a heap of money on. I could feel myself gettin’ real jealous, to the point where I wanted to go out there and snatch my man away from that prissy-ass white gal. I knew Henry was in love with me. I could tell it. Just in the way that he stared at me with them big, blue, sneaky eyes of his. Her back was toward me, and Henry was watchin’ me from the dance floor.