Lights, Cowboy, Action

by Lesley Ann McDaniel

  Did she say shock?

  Suddenly the weight of what Courtney had done hit her with hurricane force. Like a total idiot, she’d blurted out confidential information to a reporter, without even considering that she might repeat it. Her mind raced. What else had she said to her?

  “The pair appeared to be following the standard on-again-off-again formula they’ve both made famous. But did Jeffrey hope to put an end to Angela’s wild ways? He might have succeeded...” She took an annoyingly dramatic pause. “If it hadn’t been for this man.”

  The screen changed to a long shot of Adam on Rocky’s back. A murmur ran through the crowd as all the blood drained from Courtney’s face.

  Macy continued. “Angela Bijou’s personal assistant told me herself that the star instructed her to set her up with this gorgeous owner of the ranch where they’re filming. All as a ploy to make Jeffrey jealous.”

  No! The room started to spin and Courtney had the sensation of floating outside her own body. This was worse than horrible.

  Terrified of Adam’s reaction, she stared straight ahead. She wanted to die. Not die exactly, but to at least fall into a convenient coma for a while. She didn’t deserve to live.

  The rest of the show was a blur of select snippets from the stars’ interviews, supporting everything Courtney had told Macy. When she finally got around to reporting the snake incident, it was entirely focused on how Jeffrey, the death-defying hero of half a dozen action films, had frozen in terror due to his “zoophobia.” Was that even a real word?

  As the screen went black and the lights came up, the place became a flurry of movement and loudly expressed opinions. Courtney wanted to bury her face in her hands, but her arms had gone numb. Horror swelled in her chest. She was officially the stupidest woman on earth.

  Slowly, she turned to face Adam. When their eyes met, his face hardened. He pushed off the wall with his shoulder and headed for the door.

  Bounding to her feet, she moved to follow, but Jody unexpectedly blocked her path, as if she might want to practice a few kick-boxing moves on Courtney’s skull.

  “Do you realize how much damage control I have to do now, thanks to you?” Apparently not expecting an answer, Jody stormed off, raising her cell phone to her ear.

  Confusion seized Courtney’s mind as her eyes zipped around. She had to get to Adam but he had disappeared into the crowd. She pushed her way to the door and looked up and down the empty street. Her mind raced as she spotted him up the block, striding toward his truck.

  “Adam!”

  He flinched slightly but didn’t slow.

  Determined not to let him get away, she took off like a bank robber, grateful for her decision to wear her Sketchers tonight instead of the cowboy boots.

  “Adam!” She closed the distance between them. “You have to let me explain.”

  “No need.” Eyes fixed dead ahead, his shoulders tightened. “I understand completely.”

  “No. You don’t.” She trotted to keep up. “There’s more to it, I swear.”

  “Sorry I couldn’t be more accommodating about the whole date thing.” He kept his tone steady and unemotional. “But you were a little unclear.”

  “Please—”

  “And if you don’t mind, I’d rather feel like a fool in private.”

  “But why would you feel like—”

  “Because...” Reaching his truck, he yanked open the driver’s side door. “I thought you were asking me out.”

  “I was.” She slid between his door and the Jeep parked next to it.

  “No.” With one hand braced on the top of the door, he fired his words like arrows. “I thought you were asking me to go out with you. Not your boss.” He slid onto the seat, his head moving from side to side. “I’m such an idiot.”

  “I’m sorry.” She took a step closer to him, hoping to prevent him from shutting the door. “I didn’t know.”

  Impatience edged his tone. “Didn’t know what?”

  “That you were the kind of person you are.”

  He fired a look that pierced her heart. “Oh, so if I had been a different kind of person, it would have been okay?”

  “No.” Confusion had her in its grip. “Please understand. I was just doing my job.”

  “Yeah, some job.” He aimed his gaze at the dirt-spattered windshield. “Now I finally see what kind of person you are.”

  His words cut straight through her. “What do you mean?”

  “I can’t believe I didn’t see it.” A chuckle sputtered from his lips. “I actually helped you trick Angela with the water. Then we forged the autographs.” He ran a hand over his eyes. “Why was I so blind? I knew those things were deceptive, but I wanted to help you.”

  Panic came in waves. “But it’s not me who’s deceptive. It’s this business.”

  “Oh, right.” His chin dipped in mock understanding. “And there’s ‘no place for God’ in your business. Well, I don’t think the business is the problem.” His eyes blazed into her. “I think you haven’t left any room for God in you.” Twisting the key in the ignition, he brought the engine to life. “I have to go.”

  “Adam...I...” Her attempt to speak came out in short, gasping breaths as she realized he was right. Defeated, she faltered back till she pressed into the side of the Jeep.

  His door slammed shut and she clutched her elbows and gulped for breath. Through tear-blurred eyes, she watched the truck rumble out of the parking space and pull away. Crumpling her face into her hands, she listened as the sound grew distant.

  Just an hour before, she’d been on top of the world. Now, she’d be lucky if the town didn’t run her out on a rail. The worst part was she probably had it coming.

  Chapter 21

  Adam steered his truck onto the pitch-black highway, trying to push all thoughts of Courtney out of his mind. What a fool he’d been, thinking she was actually interested in him when all along she’d just been facilitating Angela’s scheme to take advantage of him. How could he not have seen it?

  As the truck bumped along, he turned on the radio to drown out his thoughts. It didn’t work. In his mind, he still saw her face. Oh, man. He really had it bad.

  Concentrating on the curves in the road, he absentmindedly sang along with Matthew West. The lyrics came to him, without his even realizing he knew them.

  “It takes everything you have just to say the word...”

  He let out a long breath, knowing what was coming next.

  Forgiveness.

  “Really, Lord?” He cast his gaze upward. “You’re not even going to let me have an hour to wallow in this?”

  He bit back the emotion he generally kept at bay except for his weakest moments, and then just when he was alone. That was the only time he could admit how much he missed his dad.

  Adam had thought more than once that he’d been cheated out of ten years of fatherly advice. Could be that was a part of the reason he had never gotten serious with any woman. There hadn’t been a man to guide him through that part of his life.

  He needed him now. If only Dad could be at the house when he got there. They could sit on the front porch and talk this thing through. But it hadn’t worked out that way. That thought only served to intensify the anger he was already feeling.

  Tightening his grip on the wheel, he focused on the road ahead and the sky full of stars. Emotions churned. He needed to get this said.

  “See, the thing is—” he spoke out loud, as if Jesus were sitting right beside him “—I really thought I loved her. You know as well as me that I’ve never felt that way before. I don’t think I’ll be able to face her again before she leaves.” His chest tightened. “Forgiveness is a mighty tall order.”

  Pulling onto the road up to the house, he drew in a long breath. God wanted him to forgive Courtney, b
ut this was the same God who had allowed his dad to be taken away from him way too soon. Right now, any kind of forgiveness seemed about as far out of reach as those stars overhead.

  * * *

  Courtney leaned against the outside of Angela’s trailer, which had been moved to the schoolyard for the day’s filming in town. Having barely slept the previous night for fear of an angry mob showing up at her window carrying torches and buckets of tar, she couldn’t remember ever feeling worse.

  She checked her Swatch. Fifteen minutes till her now-dreaded meeting with Mr. Bloom. She had seriously considered just skipping it and sparing him the trouble of having to explain why he would never hire a turncoat like her, but that seemed unwise. She had to face the music sooner or later.

  Not that derailing her career was the worst part of this whole mess, or even blowing it with Adam. The worst part was that she’d let God down. It had been ridiculous to think she could trick Him with some kind of Christian compromise. What did that even mean? Acting like a Christian when it was convenient for her? Adam was so right. She had pushed God out of her life.

  The walkie-talkie on her belt crackled out a message telling the crew to break for lunch. She’d have to tell Angela she was going, but her stomach buckled at the thought. Angela had barely spoken a word to her all morning, and Courtney had a feeling that wasn’t good.

  She entered the trailer, where Angela sat at her makeup counter with her back to the door, her flimsy peach robe draped over her costumed form.

  Courtney cleared her throat. “Ms. Bijou? I’m leaving for lunch now.”

  Angela fingered a hairbrush on the counter. “Is my sushi on its way?”

  Courtney nodded. “With extra wasabi, just the way you like it.”

  Looking absently at the brush, Angela gave a tiny sniff. Courtney paused. Had she been crying?

  Courtney wavered. It didn’t feel right leaving her like this. With knees shaking, she inched forward. “I’m sorry for what happened.”

  Apart from a slight raise of her shoulders, Angela didn’t respond.

  Courtney gathered her nerve. “I realize now that I should have been more careful about what I said to Macy Kendall. It’s just that she told me Adam was going to wind up looking bad in her story, and I needed to be sure that didn’t happen.”

  Angela sniffed again, drawing her fingers across the brush like it was a tiny banjo.

  “So I just wanted to apologize to you. I hope you’ll forgive me.”

  When no response came, she turned and reached for the doorknob.

  “So it’s true then.”

  Courtney twisted a look over her shoulder. “What is?”

  “You told that woman everything.” There was an unnerving restraint to her voice. “About Jeffrey and me. And Adam.”

  Turning full around, Courtney hunted for a rationale. “I assumed I could trust her.”

  “Don’t be naive.” Snapping up the hairbrush, Angela shot a glance over her shoulder. “Everyone in Hollywood knows Macy Kendall can’t be trusted.”

  Courtney sighed. Sure. Everyone knows now.

  “So you just spilled it all.” Angela’s voice sounded clipped as she thumped the brush against the counter. “Without giving a moment’s thought to how it might impact me.”

  Courtney braced herself, torn between feeling encouraged at this glimpse of the old Angela, and worried that she was about to get the hairbrush flung at her face.

  “You’re right,” she said quickly. “I just didn’t want to see Adam get hurt. Or Jeffrey.”

  Angela glared at her own reflection. “And you didn’t think about how awful everything you said would make me look?”

  The muscles in Courtney’s legs tightened, as if preparing her for a swift exit. “I know I had no right to say anything, but it was all true.” A prickle ran up her neck. “I...I guess I just figured you were impermeable.”

  Angela angled her head, her brows drawing together. “Meaning?”

  “Meaning—” Courtney laced her fingers together in front of her “—it doesn’t seem to matter to you what people think. You’re Angela Bijou.”

  Whipping around in her chair, Angela draped an arm across its back and speared Courtney with her trademark evil eye. “You think it’s easy being me?”

  The desire to choose flight over fight flooded Courtney’s limbs, but her sense of duty held her riveted to the spot. “I’m sure not always.”

  Eyes still bolted to Courtney, Angela rose to her feet. “You have no idea what it’s taken to get here.”

  She made a sweeping motion with the hairbrush, giving Courtney to assume she meant where she was in her life, not her actual physical location.

  “Do you have any clue what it feels like to walk into a room full of actresses who look exactly like you, who are all up for the same degrading role in an insipid movie?” Her emotion rising, Angela began to pace. “To live with four other girls in a tiny apartment in the scariest part of L.A. because it’s all you can afford?”

  As that sank in, Courtney fidgeted. She had no idea Angela’s life had ever been like that.

  “And to have to flirt with a leering director because you need to make your one-fifth of the rent for the crummy apartment, and then to lose the part because you’re ‘not blonde enough’?”

  Courtney’s heart filled. That sounded pretty awful.

  With mouth twitching and eyes reddening, Angela crossed the room and sank onto the sofa. “No. I’m guessing you never had to do anything like that.” Her words sounded pinched as tears started to pool. “You probably went to college on your parents’ dime and sailed straight into a career in movies on a wave of enthusiasm and your willingness to be treated like dirt by people like me.”

  Courtney wanted to respond but didn’t know how, since what Angela had just said about her was largely accurate. Feeling awkward, she grabbed a box of tissues off the end table and perched next to Angela.

  Dropping the brush in her lap, Angela took a tissue and blew her nose. When she spoke again, her voice came out choked. “The thing is that the harder it got, the more determined I was to make it. It was all about getting what I wanted no matter who I had to knock down.”

  Courtney stayed completely still, afraid that if she said anything Angela might realize she’d confessed too much and would now have to kill her.

  “Then when the snake almost bit me...” She paused as tears created rivulets down her thickly made-up cheeks. “It was like a voice from above telling me to take a look at my life. I realized I’ve been hurting people in order to get my way and not even caring.” Hugging herself, she pulled in a gasp. “Now I have this big successful career, and lots of clothes, and two huge houses that I hardly ever see. All because I bully people into giving me what I want.” She burst into sobs. “What kind of person does that?”

  Assuming she didn’t actually expect an answer, Courtney just gave a sympathetic nod and handed her another tissue.

  Angela swabbed her mascara-run eyes and took in a jittery breath. “I was so upset about the snake, I just couldn’t get it together to do any more filming that day.” She turned to Courtney. “Do you know what Keith did? He yelled at me. He told me he’s had enough of my behavior. Then he went and told Travis not to hire me.” Her face scrunched up as a fresh wave of emotion hit. “I ruined my chance to work with my favorite director. That was my dream.” Crumpling, she succumbed to a fit of howling sobs.

  Courtney’s shoulders stiffened. She wouldn’t have guessed that working with Mr. Bloom had the same meaning for Angela as it did for her.

  After a moment, Angela regained some composure. “Tell me the truth, Courtney.” She looked up through puffy eyes. “Am I really that horrible?”

  Discomfort cut short all chance of forming a coherent answer. What was she supposed to say?

  �
�I need you to tell me.” Angela pressed. “Nobody in my life is really honest with me.”

  “Well...I...” Courtney rolled in her lips. There was no way around it. This was her chance to speak the truth. “I wouldn’t say that you’re horrible. But I have had to do some things that I shouldn’t have done just to keep you happy.”

  Angela’s ruddy brow furrowed. “Like what?”

  “Well...” She drew herself up. “Like filling your water bottles with spring water until the real D’eau Douce arrived.”

  “Oh?” She seemed puzzled. “You mean, I drank spring water?”

  “You liked it better.” Her courage rose. “And signing your name to those photos. That was wrong. Maybe even illegal.”

  “I see.”

  “But the worst thing was that I helped you take advantage of Adam. I never should have agreed to set him up like that.”

  “But...” Angela looked away, then back at Courtney, her eyes narrowing. “If you knew those things were wrong, why did you do them?”

  Courtney scrunched her face. Wasn’t it obvious? “Because I didn’t want you to fire me.”

  Angela scoffed. “I wouldn’t have fired you.”

  Creasing her forehead, Courtney stared. “But you said—”

  “Don’t you know I’m full of hot air? You’re the best assistant I’ve ever had.” She dabbed at her eyes. “If I fired you, who knows what I’d get? Most people won’t put up with me the way you do.”

  A bewildered laugh escaped Courtney’s throat. All this time, she had been worried about losing her job for nothing. That ought to teach her not to act out of fear.

  Her tears subsiding, Angela stood and crossed to the window. “I really blew it on this movie.” She looked at Courtney. “But do you know what the worst part is?”

  Courtney hesitated. It actually got worse? “What?”

  “Jeffrey.” She gave a long blink. “I had my one shot at the real deal, and I messed that up big time.” Staring outside, she rubbed her upper arms. “I got scared, and I did what I always do—I went after the next good-looking guy to make the old one jealous. I hurt people before they have a chance to hurt me.” She spat out a sardonic snicker. “I’m a real gem, aren’t I?”