“You have an irrational fear of abandonment.”
Her jaw dropped open.
“Your parents.”
Her eyes welled. “Stop it,” she said weakly. “P-please. Stop.”
“I told you not to let what happened to you shape your future. That applies to everything that’s happened to you.”
Tears in her eyes slid down her face.
Ashley’s eyes saddened. Her brows drew together. She then looked up to her mate and met her gaze. “Can you promise you’ll think about it?”
She would think about it whether she promised or not. “Yes, I will.”
****
Daylight faded. Valerie sat on the couch, wringing her hands. She’d done this endlessly for three days. Trying to watch TV, trying to read, anything to keep her mind off Jake and Annie, but nothing helped.
Her mind wandered and wandered, always to Jake and Annie. She thought a lot about what Ashley and Clyde said. It made her want to go after him, after them.
Three days without their presence had been rough. She missed them. The thought of eleven more days without either of them seemed like eternity. Annie had become a lifeline in her new reality, and Jake…well, she just missed him. She couldn’t say why or how that was possible. They hadn’t been on good terms, but that didn’t mean she didn’t look forward to seeing him every night before he went off to fight Malums, didn’t mean she didn’t worry for hours, didn’t mean she wasn’t relieved the second he came home.
Yet, none of that meant she should crash their vacation. She thought about it and came to a conclusion. If he lost custody of Annie, this was precious time he and Annie would both cherish for the rest of their lives. She had no right to butt in. He deserved another apology at least, but it could wait.
Did he really care about her? Clyde and Ashley wouldn’t lie. Still, she couldn’t believe it. He was so…handsome, and strong and simply breathtaking. Any woman could fall for him. His smile like his anger could melt her. She was just…her.
Sitting on the couch, an open book resting on Val’s lap, Nathan materialized in front of her, halting her rambling thoughts. “Pack a bag, come.”
God, not this again. Why did everyone keep insisting she should be with Jake? It didn’t make any sense. “Not you, too?”
“As a friend I’m telling you if you don’t go, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”
She laughed, humorlessly. “The rest of my life?”
He squared his shoulders. “What have you done today? Yesterday? How about the day before?”
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“You haven’t done a damned thing. You’ve been sitting here stewing in guilt. Why don’t you just go and make things right?”
“This isn’t a normal man we’re talking about. This is Jake.” And she was a coward.
“He’s not angry with you.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I know,” he said, firmly. “Now let’s go. I don’t have much time, and you need to dress and pack.”
She stood and, because he was so much taller, her head shot back to meet his gaze. “No.”
“If you don’t dress and pack, I’ll materialize you to Jacob in that.” His gaze snapped down and up again.
Though he said it with a smile, she knew he’d materialize her wearing a long shirt and barefoot. Still, she had to try. Her eyes narrowed. “You wouldn’t. I’ll turn you into…into a camel!”
His smile widened. “Go ahead.”
After a moment of silence, each staring each other down, she gave in. “Fine.” Nathan wasn’t bluffing. He’d take her and leave her, and in that case, she rather dress and grab a bag. “I’ll pack, but I know when I see him he’s going to be mad and then—”
“Then you can turn him into a horse or a bat.” He laughed. “He’d love that.”
“Not funny.”
His stare softened. “There won’t be anything to forgive. When you see him, you’ll thank me.”
Halfway down the hall, he yelled, “I’m doing this because I care.”
She packed a small duffel bag, convincing herself she’d apologize, say hi to Annie, then leave. Dressing in a pair of jeans, a fitted blue blouse, and a pair of sandals, she headed back into the living room.
When she met Nathan’s gaze, anxiety crawled up her spine. One hand tightened on her duffel, the other she wrapped around herself. What would she say? What would Jake say? Would he really be glad to see her?
She hoped so. Her fear and her gift’s warning aside, she would be glad to see them both.
Chapter 21
Annie, fast asleep, rested against him. Sadly, she drifted off before the fireworks she’d been excited to watch. He couldn’t blame her. It had been a long day. Tomorrow, he’d let her sleep in. Hopefully, then she’d stay up later.
Walking from the beach onto the hotel’s pool deck and bar, he spotted the restrooms and entered a stall, then dematerialized. A moment later, he reappeared in his hotel room.
Valerie.
Her scent wafted into his senses. His heart pounded rapidly. His hands began to sweat. Just days without her, and he was fucking losing it. No possible way she could be here. She’d made her feelings clear. Seeing a slim silhouette at the end of the room, he flicked the lights on, and saw her more clearly.
Beautiful, a pair of jeans encasing her legs, a blue shirt hung off one shoulder; she stood at the far end of the room. Her long auburn hair in waves spilled around her heart-shaped face. Her honey eyes on him almost appeared to glow against the dimly lit room. As if he needed further proof he lost his mind, he felt worry radiate from her.
His gaze trailed up and down her body several times, waiting for the image to dissolve. It didn’t, so he forced himself to close his eyes, knowing the minute he opened them she’d disappear. Yet a moment later when he did, she was still there, still staring right back at him.
He couldn’t explain it. But thought if his mind gave him a glimpse of what he craved the most, he should take advantage. It wouldn’t soothe him though. It’d only serve to remind him what he missed, what was meant for him yet not his.
He didn’t need that. That, he couldn’t forget.
Jaw clenched, he strode into one of the bedrooms, tugged the covers back, laid Annie on the bed, and tucked her in tightly just the way she liked. After pressing a kiss onto her forehead, he headed back into the living room.
Still, the image of his fated remained, still unmoving. The worry he’d sensed earlier overshadowed with sadness. As if she were real, his chest tightened.
“H-hi.” Her voice broke when she spoke. She then took a step in his direction. “Jake, I’m—”
He materialized inches from her.
Her voice died, her eyes widened, then came the fear.
So clear. Those honey eyes. Her flushed face. That intoxicating scent. Her chest rising and falling with each breath. Even her voice. Just like it was real.
He reached for her.
She gasped. Her lips parted slightly. Then finally, his fingers grazed the side of her face. And she did the damnest thing—she leaned into his touch.
She was real, real, and he’d walked right by her.
“Valerie,” he whispered in awe.
She came, subjecting herself to endless days with him, with Annie while on their vacation. That could only mean she had a change of heart, wanted more from him. His heart burst, so many emotions running through him: relief, happiness, pleasure.
It had only been few days, but he’d missed her so goddamned much. He never realized how much he needed even a glimpse, not until he’d gone without.
“Release me from my vow.” His voice sounded coarse. “Please, release me.”
She nodded, slightly.
He claimed her lips in a searing kiss, delving into her mouth, tasting her. She wrapped her arms around him, kissing him, forcefully, and passionately.
Her fingers digging into his skin, he feverishly laced his t
hrough her hair. Just as thick and soft as he imagined, then he trailed his hand down her back, fully pressing her against him until every part of her chest pressed to his.
He couldn’t help but think once again how perfectly her body fit his. Tiny compared to him, a fraction of his height and width, but she soothed every ache, every worry.
Cupping her cheek, he broke away from the kiss to stare into her beautiful eyes.
“H-hi.” She swallowed. “I’m sorry, I should’ve called.”
He grinned. “Called?” He shook his head, chuckling. “I’ve missed you so damned much.”
“You…You aren’t mad?”
His thumb slid across her bottom lip. He kissed the tip of her nose, then her lips. “I’ve never been mad at you, Val.”
“But…” She drew away. Her body still close yet not touching. “You were when…”
She moved, and her hair gleamed in the lights. Remembering what it felt like, he thought it couldn’t have been so thick, so soft. To test the theory, he grabbed a strand and ran his fingers through it. He’d been wrong. It was that soft, that thick.
“Stop it.”
Realizing he hadn’t been paying attention, his gaze snapped to hers. He tucked the strand behind her ear. “Sorry…I…”
Resting her hand on his chest, she shook her head. “No. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…I was trying to tell you something, and well…it’s just I can’t concentrate when you do that.”
A smile spread across his lips.
She didn’t seem to notice, lost in thought. Placing both hands on his chest, she tapped her foot impatiently. “When you got here, and you saw me. You were mad.”
Mad? Was he? He shook his head. “No, Val, I wasn’t mad. You’d know if I was mad.”
She seemed to consider his words, before she reasoned, “But your eyes glowed, and…and you ignored me.”
“A demon’s eyes glow for a number of reasons, not just when we’re mad. I went into the room because I thought you weren’t…”
“You thought I wasn’t what?”
“When Annie and I left, we weren’t on the best terms. I thought I imagined you.”
Her eyes widened. “Oh.” She took a breath. “Maybe you should sit.”
He nodded. “Would you like something to drink? A glass of wine—”
She nodded. “That’s fine.”
He moved at immortal speed pouring a glass of wine, then popping the cap off a beer. Handing her the glass of wine, he sat beside her.
“How’s Annie?”
“Good, but she missed you.”
She took a big gulp of wine. “I know.”
“Know? About Annie?”
Her eyes cast downward avoiding his gaze, she nodded.
“Ashley told you?”
Meeting his gaze, she hesitated. “Yeah. You’re not mad at her, right? She didn’t mean to…I think—”
He shook his head. “Not mad. I wanted to tell you, but I knew you’d come—”
She stilled. “And you didn’t want me here?”
He quirked a brow. “Was my greeting too subtle? I can work on that if you like.”
She flushed, then took another large gulp of wine.
“I wanted to tell you. I knew you’d come, and I didn’t want to force you to be in such close proximity to me because of the circumstances.”
She exhaled.
Then it occurred to him. Why had she come? He assumed she had a change of heart, but now he wasn’t so sure. Had she come because she knew he could lose Annie and wanted to spend time with her or because she wanted to spend time with them both? Learning the truth about Annie wouldn’t have changed her opinion of him, and she had been clear. She wanted their relationship to remain professional. He assumed she came for him, but had she? If she hadn’t, why had she let him kiss her? Pity? He tensed.
“What are you thinking?”
He took a deep pull of his beer, then met her gaze. “Why’d you come, Val?”
She looked away for a brief moment, then met his stare and admitted, “I wanted to apologize again about the other night. I also wanted to apologize about the day we…um…kissed, and I found out about Annie, and everyone kept telling me you needed a friend, that I should come and—”
“I see; my friends talked you into coming. You did so, out of pity.”
The anguish of saying it aloud crushed him, but his tone didn’t convey the truth. He took another swig of beer. It didn’t dull it. He needed something stronger.
She set the glass of wine on the table. “No, that’s not true—”
“Did you let me kiss you out of pity, too?”
Her eyes widened and watered.
Seeing that was worse than being shot with copper, worse than being stabbed.
She was his. She should want him, need for him. If she didn’t, admitted it, and it pained her, he shouldn’t feel it in his soul.
Setting his beer on the table, he turned fully to her, grabbed the back of her neck with one hand, snaked his other around her waist, and pressed her into his embrace. As he did so, he buried his face in her neck. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“What?”
Pulling away just enough to meet her gaze, he cursed under his breath. “I’m sorry. Tell me what I said that upset you.”
Scanning his face, her lips millimeters from his. She bit the side of her lip. “Every time I think I’ve gotten you figured out, I realize I’ve got it all wrong.”
He didn’t know what to say, so he said nothing.
She stared unblinking into his gaze. Her hand trailed down his chest, then she whispered, “Your eyes are red again.”
He bet they were. “Your hands are teasing my demon.”
Her fear heightened. She drew away, quickly. His arm around her waist tightened. An impulse, but he recognized even if he wanted to, right then, he couldn’t let her go.
“He…he doesn’t like me?”
She couldn’t be more wrong. A smile spread across his lips. “He likes you a little too much.”
Her brows drew together, now looking worried. “Can he hurt me?”
He shook his head. “He can’t.”
“Why?”
“Because I want you, too.”
Her breath hitched. She swallowed, then hesitantly laid her hand on his chest again. “It’s true?”
Did she know she was his? Who told her? “Yes.”
Her eyes scanned his face, then watered. “I’m scared. I don’t want to get hurt.”
He shook his head. “Impossible. I can’t hurt you.”
“You can and will when you find your fated, Jake.”
So…She didn’t know. Part of him was relieved; he wanted to be the one to tell her. Yet another part of him wished she knew. “No, Val, I won’t ever hurt you. I vow it.”
It would’ve been easy to admit it then. In fact, he’d been close, but her lips met his. The moment they did, her tongue entwined with his so softly he couldn’t physically pull himself away.
That first taste…
Pure, heated magic.
Desire consuming him, he hauled her against him until she settled on his lap, and then he deepened the kiss.
Her hands grasped the back of his head, pressing her chest against his. Feeling her nipples harden under her cotton blouse, he groaned. He ran his hand down her back, then under her shirt. Like silk, soft to the touch and warm.
She responded so sweetly, arching her back. A soft moan escaped her lips. Her hands tightened when they roamed his back, her nails digging into his shirt, into his skin.
Breathing her in, his shaft throbbing so painfully underneath her thighs he thought he’d burst through his jeans. He groaned deep in his throat, then raked his hand up her leg and cupped her rear. Breaking their kiss, he dragged his lips down her neck, licking her lightly. The need to kiss every inch of her burned.
His teeth shifted, fangs sprang.
He wanted to scream in frustration. He couldn’t mark her, no
t before he told her, but he didn’t have the strength to pull away, so he slowed his pace, kissing softly, skimming the skin on her lower back. Then he heard the softest, sweetest whimper.
“Jake…” Her body shuddered.
One arm snaked around her waist, the other he dragged up her spine, cupped the back of her head, and drew her lips to his, kissing her ever so tenderly.
“Jake, please, stop…” She gasped.
He stilled. Had he been too rough? Had he hurt her? His stomach turned. Having no choice, he let her go, but his heart and body protested. He gave her room, leaning against the back of the couch.
He swallowed past the lump in his throat, then with a hoarse voice asked, “Did I hurt you?”
Apart from unhooking her arm from around his neck, she hadn’t moved. It meant even then, she still sat on his lap. Her face flushed, her lips gloriously swollen, she smiled softly. Beautiful.
“I thought you said you couldn’t.”
She cut into his thoughts. For a moment, he had to focus, gather his wits, and think about what she meant. “Never mean to, but I want you so bad, I don’t…” He shook his head. “I don’t know if I was too—”
Her hand slid across the side of his face. “You didn’t.”
The breath rushed out of him.
“It’s just you make me feel things…I’ve never done more than…kissing.”
Even with her cheeks flushed, he saw her embarrassment. Hell, he could feel it. Funny since it thrilled him.
No one had ever touched her; he was the first. It didn’t dull the pain of watching her kiss another man. Nothing would. But it made him feel better, knowing she’d never given herself to anyone, knowing she was all his. Maybe it was selfish and stupid to think, but he didn’t care.
It didn’t mean he’d rush her to give in to him. No, he’d take his time, give her all the time she needed. He didn’t want her to regret a single thing about him, or them.
Drawing her against him, he kissed her lips lightly, then immediately pulled away, not expecting anything else. When she leaned into him and rested her head against his chest, he thought it was the perfect end. Smiling, he laced his fingers through her auburn hair.
“Jake,” she whispered after several moments. Placing her hands on his chest, she looked into his eyes. “I know I apologized yesterday, but I wasn’t completely honest. You said I was honest, so you didn’t want an apology. The thing is…I didn’t mean what I said. I said we didn’t need you, and maybe we didn’t, but I wanted you…to hold me.”
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