Double Dippin'

by Allison Hobbs

  “Stop, Misty,” he complained, squirming away. “Quit it unless you gon’ do something about it.”

  “I’m tempted, but we gotta save your strength for the sucka we run into tonight. I’ll get mine later on…that is, if you have any juice left.”

  “Aiight, so where we gonna find this freak?” Brick said, looking doubtful.

  “Oh you don’t think I can find us a freak? Brick, when you gonna get it through your head? Every black man, white man, red man, Chinese man-or whatever, every man on this planet ain’t nothing but a stone cold freak. They might pretend that they ain’t trying to get it on with another man, but I know how to get to the truth.”

  “Aiight. So where we goin’?”

  “We should go to a hotel bar. Someplace where honkies hang out. We need a big payday and white men are willing to pay top dollar for big black dick.” Misty paused and looked Brick up and down. “You still gotta wear that blind-fold?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Because everybody ain’t into your hang-ups. Wearing that blindfold is a turn-off for some men. We ain’t in no position to be turning off no paying customers.”

  “Whassup with you, Misty? You know I don’t get down like that. I don’t wanna look at no strange dude sucking my dick. I ain’t no damn faggot.”

  Misty sighed. “You think because you’re not looking, that makes you normal? You ain’t normal, Brick,” she yelled. “It’s time to face up to the fact that you’re on the down low.”

  Brick shook his head in denial. “I ain’t no homo; I ain’t on no damn down low!”

  “Did I say you were a homo? No! I said the shit you do ain’t natural and you’re on the down low. There’s a big difference. A homo switches his ass and wears wigs and makeup, trying to look like a bitch. But you’re all man,” she said in a seductive tone. “Your dick is too big to satisfy females only. You’re blessed, baby; you should feel honored that all those men wanna suck on your jawn. Feel me?”

  “Yeah.” Brick smiled broadly.

  “And since we’re on the subject, let me ask you something.”

  “Whassup?”

  “You know, we could make a lot more money if you started giving up some head.”

  “What!” Brick’s voice boomed so loud it seemed to make the pavement vibrate.

  “You gotta do it for me, Brick. We need the money. We could get even more cheddar if you reciprocated and gave up some brain, too.”

  “You know I can’t do that,” Brick said, angry.

  “I bet you’d give Shane some head.”

  Brick flinched. “That’s different; you was in love with Shane. If I gave that nigga some head, it woulda been on the strength of you.”

  “Yeah, right,” she said with unmasked disdain. “If Shane would have agreed to it, you might have tried to whip my ass if I stood in the way of you and that nigga’s dick.”

  Brick puffed up in denial.

  “Oh, stop trying to act like I’m lying. You wanted Shane ever since y’all were in the joint together. You probably would have let Shane fuck you in the ass.”

  Brick took a swig from the forty and then hung his head-a silent and embarrassed admission.

  “But it’s a shame, though,” Misty continued. “I tried to make life real sweet for Shane. I was willing to let him have both of us, but when we tried to show that nigga love, what did he do? He ran from us like we had a damn disease. Fuck Shane.” Misty yanked the forty from Brick and downed the remaining contents. She wiped her mouth with the back of her dainty hand. “And fuck you, too,” Misty shouted furiously. “You ain’t worth a fuck, either,” Misty snarled.

  Brick looked near tears. Misty glared at him. “I got knocked! I spent months in jail and how many times did you and Shane visit me? Um…how ’bout…never?” She gestured with her arms spread; palms up.

  Brick fiddled uncomfortably. “You know I ain’t have no way to get all the way to that women’s prison. They stopped the van service that takes people to the prison.”

  “No they didn’t; that van comes to the prison every weekend. You just didn’t feel like getting up at six in the morning. But you know what? Forget you, nigga. Go ’head, and do you because I’m damn sure gon’ do me!” She dismissed Brick with a hand flip. “I know what I have to do.” Misty turned away from Brick and started walking fast in the opposite direction.

  Brick ran behind her. Caught her by the back of her jacket. Misty jerked away.

  “Aiight, Misty. Set it up. I’ll do it,” Brick said, looking miserable.

  “And you’re not wearing no damn blindfold,” she said in a no-nonsense tone.

  “No blindfold,” Brick sadly conceded.

  After being chumped by Paula’s husband, Shane turned the car around and decided to go home and patch things up with his wife. Kapri wasn’t much fun anymore, she didn’t look anywhere near as good as she’d looked when he met her. She didn’t keep herself up, she was unkempt, and unappealing. Her brittle ponytail and sallow complexion irked him.

  Her gloomy presence filled Shane with a fury that was difficult to contain. Often, he had to control himself from smacking her across her tear-stained cheek or smacking her upside her head for crying for no reason at all. Everything about Kapri pissed Shane off. But he would never put his hands on the mother of his son. It was best to just walk away until his rage subsided.

  The despair in the Batista household was suffocating. Shane needed fresh air; he needed to breathe again. He yearned for his old life with Misty and Brick. But he was stuck; he couldn’t abandon his wife and son. His feelings toward Kapri confused him, but he was sure there was still love for her buried somewhere in his heart. But it was buried so deeply, it was hard to find.

  He loved his son, without a doubt. K’Shan was his heart. He just hated all the constant crying and couldn’t wait for the little guy to start walking and talking.

  When he got home, the apartment was dark and quiet. He figured Kapri was probably lying in the dark bedroom sniffling into a pillow. Shane sighed and braced himself for his wife’s sad, bloodshot eyes. Shane clicked on the light switch and saw a note lying on the dining room table. Instinctively, he knew that Kapri had taken the baby and left.

  I’m not a martyr and I’m not taking any more of your abuse. Leave my car in front of the apartment; my father will be picking it up first thing tomorrow.

  Kapri

  Dayum! He couldn’t believe she’d leave like that. Shane reached for the phone in the kitchen. Hell if he was going to let her just take his son.

  “Lemme speak to Kapri,” he demanded when her mother answered the phone.

  “The only way you’re ever going to speak to or see my daughter again is in divorce court, so I suggest you get yourself a lawyer.” Kapri’s mother slammed down the phone.

  Shane held the phone in disbelief. Fuckin’ bitch banged on me!

  He stormed into every room. And every room was empty. Kapri and her parents had cleaned out the place. There wasn’t a shred of evidence that Kapri or the baby had ever lived there.

  Shane sank onto the sofa and buried his head in his hands. The last time he’d felt this bad was…he didn’t even want to go there. If he thought about either of the two important women in his life—his birth mother and his foster mother—he’d lose it and start smashing mirrors, dishes, anything breakable.

  Though he could barely remember his birth mother, he’d always remember her scent. She smelled like milk.

  And his foster mother smelled like talcum powder and had tried her best to duplicate what he needed and missed so much. He’d spent more time with Dolores Holmes and missed her the most.

  “Mommy!” Shane grieved and wept openly for Dolores Holmes, the woman who’d given him unconditional love.

  CHAPTER 42

  He had to patch things up with his brother. What had gotten into him? He’d never laid a hand on Tariq in his life. Shane decided not to call Tariq; he’d just go to his apartment and face him like a man. Damn, he needed a bro
therly hug.

  Shane stopped at the front desk and the desk man called Tariq’s apartment and announced that Shane was in the lobby. “Go ’head up, man,” the clerk said.

  In the elevator, Shane wondered what he was going to say. Knowing Tariq, he wouldn’t have to say anything. Tariq would understand the meaning of the visit. His presence and a big hug would let his brother know that he was sorry.

  No, fuck that! He owed Tariq an apology. He’d be a man and tell his brother face-to-face that he was wrong. Dead wrong! He was wrong for everything—the things he’d said about Janelle and the way he’d been treating Kapri.

  Maybe together, he and Tariq could put their heads together and figure out a way for Shane to get Kapri and K’Shan back. Damn, he’d really fucked up his life.

  With an expression of disgust, Janelle opened the door. “Tariq ain’t here,” she announced.

  “So, why ain’t you tell the dude at the desk?” Shane asked, his face contorted in annoyance. He couldn’t stand Tariq’s wife, there was no getting around it.

  “Thought you might want to see your nephew; guess I was wrong.”

  Shane’s face softened. “Lil’ Man’s still up?”

  “He’s about to fall asleep, but he’s fighting it.” Janelle drifted toward her son’s bedroom. Shane followed.

  “Look who’s here, Lil’ Man.”

  “Unc Shane,” the toddler said, reaching for Shane.

  Shane threw his nephew in the air and caught him, causing the little guy to erupt into squeals of laughter. “Man, you look so much like your pop, it’s scary,” Shane said, observing his nephew with wonder.

  Janelle took her son from Shane’s arms. “All right, tell Uncle Shane goodnight. It’s time to turn your light out.”

  Lil’ Man said goodnight by opening and closing both fists. Janelle smiled; Shane laughed. He and Janelle had something in common after all. They both thought Lil’ Man was adorable and they didn’t compete for his affection they way they vied for Tariq’s.

  “So where’s Tariq? What time’s he coming home?”

  “He’s on a job out of town. You two work together, didn’t you know that?”

  “We had a little problem in the locker room,” Shane admitted. “I came over to see if everything was cool.”

  “He sounded all right when I spoke to him. He didn’t even mention it,” she said, wearing a puzzled expression. “It’s not like Tariq to keep secrets from me. What happened at work?” she asked, her brow arched.

  “Something stupid.”

  Janelle looked at Shane with penetrating eyes. “Why don’t you like me, Shane?” Her question came completely out of the blue.

  Taken off guard, Shane’s gaze dropped to the floor. “You aiight,” he said and then looked up. “But for real though, I don’t like the way you treat my brother.

  You treat him like he’s your son—like he’s Lil’ Man or somebody. Tariq’s a grown-ass man; he don’t need you to lead him around by the nose,” Shane said, relieved to release the angry words.

  “And what do you really know about Tariq? I’m his wife and I know exactly what he needs and when he needs it. All you can do for Tariq is get him in trouble; break up his happy home life the way you’ve broken up your own. You’re nothing but trouble, Shane,” Janelle said with a sneer. “I saw it the first time I laid eyes on you. If I really led Tariq by the nose, as you say, he wouldn’t even be in the same room with you. I wouldn’t allow it. But having a relationship with you is one of the few things Tariq gets away with.” Her eyes gleamed as she challenged the great Shane—Tariq’s hero. “If I didn’t run a tight ship, who knows…Tariq might have ended up being a no-good husband and a terrible father just like you.”

  “Who da fuck you think you talking to? You don’t even deserve to be with Tariq and you know it. It’s a miracle Lil’ Man came out aiight. He coulda caught that shit you got on your face.”

  “A birthmark isn’t contagious, you idiot,” Janelle said with a sneer.

  “Whatever. But you should be ashamed to be walking around in public with that green shit splattered all over the side of your mug.”

  Janelle glared at Shane, but didn’t say a word.

  “You only got your hands on Tariq because I was locked up. He must have been crazy. He couldn’t have been thinking straight, fucking around with a ugly-ass bitch like you!”

  Janelle didn’t flinch. She smiled. She’d been working out, her body was back in shape. She stood in a sexy stance. “Oh, so you think I’m ugly, Shane?”

  After an awkward silence, Shane nodded his head. He turned up the corner of his lip for emphasis.

  “Tariq says I’m beautiful. And sexy…so it must be true,” she taunted. She glided toward him. She smiled provocatively as she approached.

  “You ain’t shit,” Shane said. He backed up uneasily. “Now you tryin’ to fuck around on my brother.”

  “You’re scared of me, Shane, that’s the problem. That’s always been the problem.”

  “Why the fuck would I be scared of your scuggly ass?” He spat out the words.

  “Because I’m too much woman for you. I’m a strong woman. I’m not one of those weak chicks you can treat any way you want. You know I got something that none of your weak chicks have. But most of all, you’re mad because this ugly chick took your brother from you.”

  Without realizing it, Shane backed into the sofa and fell into a seat. Janelle’s words were like a windstorm, throwing him off balance, knocking him down.

  Janelle sat next to him. “You can’t forgive me for taking Tariq, can you?”

  “Man, you ain’t take Tariq from me. We’re twins. Can’t nobody come between us.”

  “I did and you know it. But that doesn’t mean we can’t all be a happy family.” Janelle’s vocal quality had turned sultry. “Kiss me and tell me if you still think I’m ugly.”

  “Get the fuck outta here.”

  “Scared?”

  “I wouldn’t do that to Tariq and I’m definitely not feelin’ you.”

  “I think you are,” she insisted. Janelle pressed her lips against Shane’s mouth.

  He felt such hatred for her, he kissed her back hard, trying to hurt her lips. He tried to strangle her with his tongue. He felt like raping her, just to hurt her.

  She forced herself into his lap and wrapped her legs around his waist. She pressed her chest against his, enticing him to help himself to what he wanted.

  But he didn’t want her to give it to him. Shane wanted to hurt her, shame her. Show her he was a man and not someone to toy with the way she did Tariq.

  But before he could turn the tables on her, Janelle softly cupped his face and kissed him again. Her tongue slid into his mouth in a way that aroused him against his will. Janelle took control of the situation and pulled him closer to her.

  Her top was damp, which confused Shane. Then he recalled what Tariq had told him…Janelle was still breastfeeding Lil’ Man.

  Shane could feel the damp stickiness through his shirt. And then he caught a whiff so powerfully familiar, it sent a flood of images across his mind. He saw his birth mother breastfeeding Tariq while he waited his turn. He felt the sorrow as he tearfully waited.

  He felt the disappointment when his mother roughly plopped him on her lap and impatiently stuck her breast in his mouth. He remembered the desperation with which he latched onto her nipple, how hard he had to suck to get just a few drops. There was never enough for him because Tariq had depleted the supply. Unable to draw milk from his mother’s breast, Shane would frantically switch to her other breast. He’d suck hard and urgently.

  “Ow!” his mother would say and smack the back of Shane’s head. “Get up; you have to wait until the milk builds back up,” she’d say as she pushed the young Shane off her lap.

  The visit to the past sent Shane into a state of profound sorrow. Once again, he felt like a neglected child. An unloved child. Now he remembered clearly. He’d loved his mother with a passion, he’d always tr
ied to please her, tried to make her love him. But she wouldn’t. Everything about him made her mad and caused her to draw back her hand, making him cower as he dodged blows. His mother had loved Tariq but she’d hated him; Shane remembered everything now.

  The sweet smell coming from Janelle reminded him of what he’d never had enough of. And like a savage, like a starving man, Shane started whimpering as he ripped the buttons off Janelle’s blouse, moaning and speaking gibberish as he unhooked her bra.

  Janelle wore a shocked expression; she didn’t understand what was happening. But when Shane clamped hungry lips onto her nipple, she felt a rush of power and felt instantly victorious. Shane sucked hard as if expecting to be disappointed, but when the sweet elixir touched his tongue and filled his mouth, he moaned in ecstasy as if he’d experienced a lifetime of thirst.

  Greedily, he went from one breast to the other, sucking, swallowing, moaning, calling out Janelle’s name. Shane emitted sounds of raw ecstasy that would have frightened an ordinary woman.

  But Janelle was no ordinary woman. She withstood the stares of people who deemed her too unattractive and unworthy to be Tariq’s wife. No, there was nothing ordinary about Janelle. And now that she knew Shane’s weakness, she was ready to have something no ordinary woman had. Two men.

  It wouldn’t be hard to convince Tariq that the three of them should be together. After all, Tariq had always told her that he and Shane shared everything. Once Tariq was convinced, they’d all move into a larger place.

  Janelle looked forward to the day when people would stare, with their big mouths wide open, when she, Tariq, and Shane went out in public. Yes, she’d be adoringly flanked by two handsome brothers. And eventually she’d give birth to a tribe of beautiful children fathered by both men. She’d show the world that she was special enough to have the love and devotion of a set of gorgeous twins.

  As she smoothed Shane’s curly hair and caressed his hair on his face, Janelle couldn’t help imagining what a child by Shane would look like. After he finished breastfeeding, she’d consummate the union.