Drink in case of Emergency

by Oliver, Carl

  Tyler had squeezed off five rounds, when he heard Scott shout that he was reloading. They had all played enough video games together to work as a decent team in this situation. Tyler turned to face the direction that Scott had been firing, carefully aiming at each zombie that moved in close enough for an easy kill.

  “Reloaded,” he heard Scott shout, and turned his direction back to the North. From behind him, Tyler heard another shout from above.

  “Coming down hot, when I hit the ground, focus all fire to the North so we can escape.” Not five seconds later, Tyler heard the scuff of Chris’s shoes hitting the pavement. “Go! Go! Go!”

  Scott and Justin turned slightly and began firing in the same direction as Tyler. Quickly, a small path was cleared and the four friends began running North, away from the tower that almost took their lives in exchange for a memorable piss.

  ****

  Father O’Connell watched the daring escape from the second floor of a bank across the street. He was at first impressed with the advanced planning that the young men had shown. He never would have guessed that they would carry a rope with them, just in case.

  Then he was a little worried, when they began firing at the crowd of empty vessels. In all the people he had delivered to God since the rapture began, he had only encountered one or two who had been so brash as to destroy one of God’s creations, even if it was only a vessel. These young men seemed to pay no mind to the human beings they were slaughtering.

  It was unsettling.

  Then, Father O’Connell felt relief. The skinny one was saved. He saw the boy get the kiss of the Lord. Right on the arm, he would soon be with God. And the best part was that the others were still with him. When he left this earth, his vessel just might bring the whole lot of them into heaven. Father O’Connell said a silent prayer of thanks, for the opportunity to do God’s will.

  While he finished his prayer, he felt a tickle at the back of his mind. Something told him that he should follow them. He wasn’t sure what it was at first. Their bloodthirsty nature? Maybe the fact that they didn’t panic, that they seemed to have an organized plan to get out of the building.

  No. That wasn’t it.

  It was how the group reacted to the man getting bit. Surely they had to know by now that the kiss was the way God freed his people. But the man almost hadn’t noticed. And his friends, they saw him get bit, and they simply ran off with him, this man who was only a few moments away from heaven.

  Father O’Connell felt a little jealous for him, for the entire group, really. Their ticket was punched, they were on their way to see God.

  Still, something made him uneasy...so he followed them.

  After getting some distance from the tower, the four friends made their way South West toward the iconic Gateway Arch, to meet Amy and Jessica.

  When they arrived, they found something unexpected.

  Instead of two girls, there were three.

  The three girls were sitting around the famous reflective bean shaped installation. Amy was in rough shape. Her hair was matted to her head, and her clothes were stained with what looked like blood. She was leaning against the arch, with a big smile on her face.

  As the men approached, Jessica was holding a large and unfamiliar rifle up to her shoulder. She was looking down it’s scope into Millenial Park. A tall, beautiful woman was reaching around her, whispering into her ear and pointing to parts on the rifle. She stepped back and a loud crack rang out as the stock of the rifle bumped back into Jessica’s unprepared shoulder.

  “Nice! Did you get him?” The tall woman said, excitement in her voice. Jessica looked through the scope, wincing a little as she had the hold the rifle tight against her shoulder again.

  “I think so? Yeah, I can’t see him anymore, I think he’s down!” Jessica looked up and smiled, noticing the guys for the first time. “Hey boys. How was the piss?”

  The question caught Tyler off guard. He could smell the booze on Jessica’s breath, but even when she had been drunk in the past, she had never been this...cheerful.

  “Best moment of my life.” Scott said without sarcasm before his voice turned to concern. “Everyone okay?” Scott motioned toward Amy with the question.

  “Oh, yeah. We had a bit of a run-in with some unsavory types.”

  “Shit, is she okay?” Chris’s voice was thick with concern.

  “Oh, yeah, that’s mostly from the booze,” Jessica continued. “The looking like hell, that is. The blood isn’t hers. It’s from Mr. Fedora.” Jessica saw that her statement confused all four of her new friends, so she ended with the best part. “But look, we made a new friend!”

  “Hi. The name’s Brooke.” The tall redhead had a devilish smile. “Pissin’ off towers is a little more dangerous than I imagined?” Brooke said, looking at Chris’s bandaged hands. Before the guys could introduce or explain themselves, Amy spoke up from the ground.

  “She saved my life. By the ancient code of the samurai, my life is hers!” Still leaning against the Arch, Amy threw her arms around wildly.

  Wow. We have drank almost every night since we met her, and I have never seen her this drunk, Tyler thought to himself.

  “Hi, Brooke. My name is Justin.” Justin reached out and shook Brooke’s hand, and then gestured around the semi-circle that had formed around this new, beautiful woman. “This is Chris, and Scott, and Tyler.” Each gave a little wave or nod as their name was called.

  Jessica had handed the rifle back to Brooke, and spent the next few minutes explaining the story of how they met their new friend. The four men listened in silence, enraptured with the story. “...and then she came with us to wait for you guys,” Jessica finished.

  “Well if you’d like, you’re more than welcome to come with us.” Justin said, the generosity of his voice giving away just a little bit of his true intentions. The tone was not lost on Brooke, who gave off a wry smile before responding.

  “Exactly where are you planning to go next? Assuming you make it out of the city alive.”

  “We were going...well...ummm...” Justin’s voice trailed off, unsure of how to actually answer this question, when Chris spoke up.

  “We like to put it up to the group as a whole. So far, Tyler and Scott have gotten to knock something off of their bucket lists. When we were on our way back down the tower we decided that one of the girls should be the one to pick our next activity. After all, based on our previous ratio...two guys got theirs, it’s due time for a girl to get a chance.”

  “I have to pick what we do next?” The excitement and energy that Jessica had been displaying suddenly fell away. She clearly wasn’t comfortable with this responsibility.

  “Not necessarily you, just one of the girls. And you don’t have to decide right away. We’ve got all the time in the world.” Justin suggested, his glance still falling on the new girl and her bewitching blue eyes.

  As the semi-circle was chatting, Amy continued leaning against the Gateway Arch, her back beginning to ache from the cold surface. She sat in a half daze, unsure of when or how she should jump into this conversation. She knew that she had ideas that the group would be interested in. She didn’t want to be left out from this decision. The last decision the group had made almost killed her, by making her come to Chicago. In the back of her mind she knew that the city wasn’t all that dangerous yet, but that every day it would get a little worse, with more and more zombies moving out from their apartments and into the streets.

  The light fog of wine was slowing down her thoughts. She wanted to contribute, but the wine was keeping her brain from moving fast enough. Just as Amy was about to call out in frustration, demanding that they slow down their talking for her, she noticed subtle movement coming from the shadows to her right. The sun stood high in the sky, and it cast a deep shadow on that side of the Gateway Arch. Something was creeping forward, and it was only a few feet from where her friends were standing. Amy knew that there was only one thing left on the planet that thought it could prey on a
group of seven well armed humans.

  Fuckin’ zombies.

  Without another thought, Amy leapt to her feet, shouting wildly. She was certain she had yelled “Look out everyone! We have walkers at three o’clock. Brooke, my newest and dearest friend, please lend me your rifle so I may pay you in-kind by saving your life.”

  While Amy was certain this is what she had said, what everyone else actually heard was “Loook...Walkers on the clockers! De-friend, payyyyyyyyy!” And as she screamed this final word, she grabbed at the rifle that was slung over Brooke’s shoulder. Brooke, being only slightly less inebriated than the shorter but spunkier Amy, wasn’t able to avoid the grasp. The rifle began falling from her shoulder and she grabbed the strap. Amy held the barrel of the gun and was wrenching hard, watching as three zombies emerged from the shadows.

  In all the commotion that Amy was causing, the entire party was distracted and looking away from the shadow only a few feet behind them. Amy, who was still facing that direction, began to panic. Why wasn’t Brooke giving her the gun? The two girls were struggling back and forth, everyone else was slowly stepping back, aware of how dangerous it was to stand close to two people fighting over a rifle. Amy watched in horror as Chris and Justin were backing right into the edge of the shadow. Small hands reached out to grab them.

  With a final scream of fury, Amy kicked Brooke hard in the chest, forcing the wind from her and and finally breaking her grip on the rifle’s strap. Everyone was a little on edge, but Justin wasn’t even able to duck or dodge to the side as Amy, still grasping the barrel of the rifle, swung the entire gun like a baseball bat. Based on the trajectory, it was going to collide with his midsection. Based on the velocity, she was going to do some damage. Scott winced as he watched Amy’s hard swing get closer and closer, wondering what the recommended emergency medical care was for broken ribs.

  Amy felt the butt of the rifle connect with a sickening crunch. Her aim had been good, she connected with and broke the skull of the first zombie who was about to bite into Justin’s right love handle.

  For a moment it reminded her of the shockwave she felt when she was a nine year old girl, and got to practice hitting a baseball with her older brothers. She used a wooden bat, just like them, even though the percussion that travelled into her hands always made her feel jittery. That was the same jitter she felt with the crack of a zombie skull. Just like when she was nine years old, she knew the feeling meant she had a solid hit.

  Everyone else heard the crack and expected to see Justin double over in pain, instead he only had a look of surprise on his face. Amy reached out, grabbed his arm and pulled him toward her, out of the way of danger. Justin, already in a bit of shock by everything that had already happened, fell past her and rolled on the pavement. Amy spun the rifle around, placing the butt of the gun, now covered in purple gooey blood, against her shoulder, further ruining her new clothes.

  Two small zombies came at her, faster than Tyler had ever seen one of the zombies move.

  No, that wasn’t true, he had seen one move faster before...but when was it?

  Despite the zombies’ apparent speed, they were still slow enough for Amy’s drunken reflexes to handle. One was a little girl of about nine years old, wearing hello kitty pajama pants and an oversized white tee shirt that hung almost to her knees, likely something her father had given her. Her accomplice was her younger brother, judging from the similar facial features. He looked to be around four or five years old, wrapped in a blue onesie with monster trucks on it.

  Amy looked back and forth between the two, and then glanced down on the ground, seeing a third little boy, possibly the twin of the little boy, purple blood pooling from his head, around his body and turning his green onesie a strange shade of brownish red.

  Three kids. Amy wasn’t able to hold back the smile that had snuck out earlier. Her face began beaming as the two children began charging her, snarls of rage and hunger across their faces. Amy’s friends stood back in awe of how fast and coordinated the children zombies were. Nobody else was able to react, leaving Amy standing alone against her enemies. In the time it took the two child zombies to cross the eight feet of open space, she was able to level the rifle and fire one shot. The bullet crashed into and shattered the snarling teeth of the little boy, the bullet continuing until it ripped a hole out of the back of his throat. The quick operation of adding a new cavity only delayed the hungry boy by a couple of steps. The nine year old girl reached her target first, however Amy was ready for her.

  Instead of stepping back, or pushing the zombie away with the barrel of her rifle, Amy tossed the gun aside and stepped forward, lashing out with a quick snapping kick at the front leg of the little girl zombie. The kick landed, throwing the zombie’s stride off balance and causing her to fall forward. Amy stepped aside and grabbed the girl with both hands by her long, brown hair.

  Throwing all of her drunken rage into the move, Amy spun the girl twice in a circle before she was airborne, spinning like her father used to do when they played “airplanes”. Amy was able to build up a little steam before the little brother stepped into the line of fire, receiving the blunt force of his sister’s knee crashing sideways against his skull and toppling him to the ground. The majority of the muscles holding his spine in place had been severed by the earlier gunshot, this final blow destroying what was left of the connective tissue.

  Following the collision, Amy and the little girl toppled to the ground. The girl began crawling toward Amy, who was crab walking away. Amy began to feel panic setting in.

  Shit. I didn’t plan for this part. I just wanted to bash them together, like I did with barbie dolls. Her drunken mind was unable to formulate a next step, only the word ‘shit’. She was about to be eaten, and she hadn’t even been to Paris yet.

  Paris, that’s a good thing for the list.

  As the little girl wrapped a few cold fingers around Amy’s ankle, Amy began to pray in her mind.

  ‘Our father, whose arts eleven, hello be the same.‘

  She felt herself getting discouraged as she was pretty certain that those were the wrong words, when a heavy boot snapped out from her peripheral vision and connected with the zombie girl’s head. It connected with such force that the girl’s head snapped back, Amy could hear the nerves popping loudly as the zombie girl fell to the ground, paralyzed from her shattered neck.

  Amy felt her heart racing, as she now said a short prayer of thanks to the whatever power had just saved her life. She looked up and was finally able to register that Chris was standing over her, holding out a bandaged hand to help her up. She took the hand and brushed herself off as she got to her feet.

  “Thanks.” Amy muttered quietly.

  “Just returning the favor.” Chris said earnestly. “I don’t know how drunk you have to be to not turn into a zombie, but I’m pretty sure a bite wound to the ankle would be a bitch to deal with, regardless.” Amy looked up and saw the gratitude in his eyes, and she felt better about the situation.

  Jessica, showing her newfound courage, dispatched the paralyzed little girl zombie with a shot to the head. The guys finished their introductions with Brooke, and the group discussed where they would hold up for the night, as evening was fast approaching. Scott and Justin wanted to go back to the office complex that they had spent the previous night at, but Brooke talked them into exploring another idea.

  While they talked, a pair of eyes watched carefully from an alley across the street. Watched, and prayed for answers of what this all meant.

  ****

  Five minutes and two blocks later, the group, now numbering seven, walked confidently through the front doors of the Ritz-Carlton hotel. The glamorous lobby had classic crystal chandeliers, marble floors, as well as a half dozen zombies milling about. Jessica and Scott quickly dispatched each of these with single gunshots to the head. Off of the lobby, there was a plush lounge area with a vintage bar, and supple chairs. All in all, Tyler thought that it would be a fine room to have a scotch an
d cigar in….not that he had much experience with either.

  The bar in the lounge area was stocked with rare liquors that none in the group had ever seen, and so they sampled and packed up the selections they enjoyed and moved back through the lobby to the stairwell, which began the discussion of which room they would stay in for the night.

  Scott and Justin wanted to be somewhere on the third floor. Close enough to the ground that the fire escape was still a viable option, but high enough that they didn’t have to worry about anything coming through the windows. Brooke argued with them that they should at least check out the penthouse suite. Everyone agreed that they had never actually seen what a penthouse suite looked like, and it’s not like they would get another chance.

  After a last ditch complaint about the number of stairs the guys had already climbed that day, the women won the argument by walking up the stairs and the men quickly followed.

  The evening was spent in the most expensive hotel room in the city. The penthouse suite was essentially a luxurious four bedroom apartment with every amenity imaginable. Plush carpets, rich fabrics, and modern, distinctively non-hotel-room-ish decor. The downside was that they didn’t get the chance to try out the whirlpool tub or the computerized showers, due to a lack of electricity.

  The kitchen of the penthouse suite was fully stocked with canned and dry goods, and Justin and Jessica went to work with cooking. Amy crashed in one of the bedrooms to sleep off the worst of her hangover from her afternoon of heavy drinking, while Brooke, Chris, Scott and Tyler toured the rest of the apartment and set up a barrier in the stairwell to serve as a defensive perimeter.

  ***

  For dinner, Justin and Jessica had whipped up a large batch of whole wheat spaghetti. While there were no meatballs, there were plenty of canned vegetables to thicken up the sauce. The group ate by candlelight, as the penthouse, as well as the entire city, was plunged into darkness with the coming dusk. Amy had woken up when she smelled the sauce simmering, although her hungover had not been diminished much by the nap.