“Well…” Jessica shifted into work mode. She’s just a client. She’s just a client. She’s just a client. “It depends, really. First—obviously—you’ll have a kitten longer. That being said, there is also training and the kitten phase to go through. Eating things that aren’t food, finding little nooks and crannies you didn’t know your apartment had, litter training—though that’s usually pretty easy—getting to know their personality as they grow with you. With an adult cat, you have different features all together. You’ll get to know them, but they already have a fully developed personality. An adult cat will most likely be a bit lower key than a kitten. Most of the time, they are incredibly loving, especially the ones from here.” Jessica touched her fingertip to the glass on the cube currently occupied by Ella, a six-year-old cat whose elderly owner had passed away, leaving her with no place to live. She was gorgeous, ash-gray fur and enormous green eyes that seemed to see everything, but also had a small tinge of sadness in them. “I believe that the adult cats we have know exactly where they are and long for somebody to adopt them. When that happens, they tend to bond with their new owners very quickly and very tightly.”
“She’s beautiful,” Sydney said quietly of Ella as she leaned closer to the glass. “What’s her story?”
Jessica told her the details. Tried hard not to feel Sydney’s eyes on her. Failed.
“Can I sit with her in the Visiting Room?” Sydney asked.
With a nod, Jessica led her to a room off the dog wing where people got to sit with potential adoptees to see how they got along, see if they clicked. Sydney took a seat and Jessica handed over Millie’s leash. “Hold her, please, while I get Ella.”
Closing the door behind her, Jessica locked eyes with Lisa down the hall. “I need a cat,” Jessica said, then went through the door that took her to the back of the cat wall.
“Is that Sydney?” Lisa asked quietly as she entered with the keys.
“It is.”
“What’s she doing here?”
“Apparently, she wants to adopt a cat.”
“You okay?” Lisa’s voice was matter-of-fact rather than sympathetic, and for that, Jessica was grateful.
“Fine.”
“Good.”
Together, they got Ella out and Jessica murmured to her as she cradled the soft, warm body close. “Okay, m’lady. Somebody wants to get to know you a bit. You all right with that?” Ella immediately started to purr in her arms. “’Atta girl. Get that motor running. Make an impression.” Back in the Visiting Room, Sydney sat in one of the orange plastic chairs, bent forward and talking quietly to Millie, who seemed for all intents and purposes to be listening very carefully. “Ella,” Jessica said. “This is my friend, Sydney. Sydney, this is Miss Ella.” She gently handed the cat over to Sydney, who very carefully set her in her lap and looked the tiniest bit terrified.
Sydney looked up at Jessica. “I’ve never had a cat before and I haven’t had a pet in eight years.”
“You have fish,” Jessica reminded her.
“Yeah, well.” Sydney made a sheepish expression. “I’m on my third Marge and my fifth Homer. What if I’m a terrible cat mom?”
Jessica gestured at Ella, who looked all kinds of comfy on Sydney’s black-clad legs and had turned up the volume on her purring. “She seems to be doing all right with you.”
Sydney ran her hand down Ella’s back, scratched behind her ears. “She does, doesn’t she?” And when she looked up at Jessica, her face showed such childlike happiness, it squeezed Jessica’s heart.
“I never expected to see you again,” Jessica blurted before she could stop herself.
“Never?”
Jessica shook her head. “I figured you were in Austin by now. Or somewhere…”
“Nope. Still here. And I always expected to see you again, for the record. Just…after I took care of some things.”
“What things?” Jessica eyed her, not sure what to do with this information.
Sydney shrugged, grinned, looked a little less nervous, but still seeming to tread carefully. “Things. Lots of things. I’d like to tell you about them some time. Maybe over dinner?”
Jessica’s eyebrows shot up in disbelief. “You’re asking me to dinner? Now? After a month and a half of no contact whatsoever?”
Sydney’s nod was full of confidence, if that was something that was even possible. Her nervousness had evaporated, as if this was the very reason she’d come, the cat only being secondary. “Yes,” she said with surety. “I am asking you to have dinner with me. And last time I checked, phone lines and Internet connections ran both ways.” She gave a pointed arch of an eyebrow to Jessica before she looked down at Ella and let those words sink in. Jessica swallowed, watched as Sydney continued to stroke the cat’s fur. “Look, Jessica, I’d really like to talk to you. I have a lot to share, but I’d rather not do it at your work.” She looked back up, made eye contact with Jessica. Intense eye contact. “Have dinner with me. Please.”
Jessica bit her bottom lip, torn. She was still angry with Sydney. Angry that she’d never bothered to call her or text her or anything her after their last time together. She’d spent quite some time stewing over it, ignoring her own passive-aggressiveness because, of course, Sydney was right. Jessica had made no effort at contact, so she was as much to blame for the radio silence. She had to shoulder some of the responsibility; it was only fair. And damn Sydney if she didn’t still look positively edible.
Jessica blew out a frustrated breath. “Do you want the cat or not?”
Sydney held her gaze for another beat before glancing down at Ella. “I do.”
“Fine. She has to go through a checkup and you need to fill out an application. Once both of those things are done, you can take her home, so”—she shook her head—“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but how about if I bring her by your place tomorrow? We can talk then.”
The grin that split Sydney’s face was so wide, it was almost comical. “I like that idea. I like that idea a lot.”
“Okay,” Jessica said, forcing herself not to mirror the smile. “Do you want more time with Ella?”
Sydney kissed the cat’s head. “No, you can take her for now. I need to go buy cat stuff.” Her excitement sounded almost childlike and Jessica couldn’t smother her own grin this time as she took Ella from Sydney’s lap.
Jerking her chin toward Sydney’s clothes, Jessica commented, “You’d better get used to that.”
Sydney looked down at her lap, her black dress slacks now covered with soft, gray fur. And she laughed. “Perfect. I love it. It’s perfect.”
Jessica furrowed her brow at the sound. “Regina at the front desk can give you an application. Just fill it out and give it back to her. I’ll see you tomorrow at…seven?”
“Excellent.” Sydney practically skipped out of the room, but not before stopping to nuzzle Ella one more time on her way. Jessica took a moment to watch her face, subtly smell the citrus scent of Sydney’s hair so near her nose, remember what it was like to be this close to her. Sydney looked up, said softly, “Thanks, Jessica. See you tomorrow.” And she was off.
Jessica stood in the Visiting Room for a moment, trying to get her bearings, right her world, which had tilted strangely and ever so slightly on its axis today. And as she took Ella back to her cubby, congratulated her on a job well done, and closed her safely inside, only one thought echoed through her head on a continuous loop: what the hell have I gotten myself into?
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
When the buzzer rang, Sydney jumped. Literally jumped. Like, out of her skin.
“God, tense much?” she said to the empty apartment as she twirled in a circle and gave it all a final once-over. She’d cleaned like crazy from the second she’d gotten home from work, going so far as to scrub the tiny kitchen floor and entryway on her hands and knees. She’d dusted, dust mopped, and scoured until the entire place shimmered like the sunlight on water.
In the corner was a cat tower…one of those climbing thing
s covered with carpet that had a bed-like platform at the top so Ella could lie on it and gaze out the window. A set of bowls sat on a paw-print placemat on the kitchen floor. In the bathroom was a litter box, tucked sensibly in a corner. The couch was neat, its afghan folded over the back, the throw pillows lined up tastefully. A bottle of Pinot Noir sat on the counter, two empty glasses next to it.
With one nod to the room, Sydney hit the button on the intercom. “Yes?”
“Cat delivery,” came Jessica’s voice, and Sydney couldn’t help but grin.
“Come on up.” She pushed the button to the door for a full three seconds, then opened the door to her apartment and went out into the hall to peer over the banister.
The sun was shining through the leaded glass windows in the lobby and it bounced off Jessica’s copper-colored hair in sparkles. She held a carrier in one hand, her purse over her shoulder with papers sticking out, and a leash attached to Millie in the other. When she looked up, her blue eyes met Sydney’s and held for a beat before she smiled hesitantly and said, “Hey.”
The wave of pure…happy, there was no other way to describe it, that washed through Sydney at the sight was something she didn’t quite understand and didn’t have the opportunity to analyze right now. Instead, she met Jessica halfway down the staircase and took the carrier from her hand.
“Hi,” she said, meeting Jessica’s gaze. “I’m glad you’re here.” She turned and went back up the stairs, and she could feel Jessica behind her, making her nerves kick into overdrive like a teenager on a first date.
“I hope it’s okay I brought Millie. Ella likes her. I thought maybe she’d help her settle in just by being here.”
“I don’t mind at all. I think it’s great.” Sydney gave Millie’s big head a pat. Inside the apartment, Sydney set the carrier down on the floor and deferred to Jessica. “What’s the best way to do this for her?”
“Let me take a look around first. Make sure there’s no place she can get hurt. Is that okay?”
Sydney held her arm out in a go ahead gesture, then watched as Jessica wandered the apartment she already knew fairly well. Her gaze hovered on the curtains, the wall art. “You’ve made some changes.”
“I have.” Sydney bounced slightly on the balls of her feet, the nervous energy needing to go somewhere.
“I like it. It looks…inviting now.” She stood in front of the painting, seemed to take it in.
Unable to keep her eyes from wandering Jessica’s body, Sydney decided not to fight it. The jeans were light and worn and looked super soft, especially the white spot near the back pocket that was almost worn through. Her navy blue button-down tank left her arms bare, and for that, Sydney thanked her lucky stars as her eyes roamed over the creamy pale skin, lightly freckled shoulders. Jessica moved out of her line of sight, presumably into the bathroom and bedroom and the idea of her in Sydney’s bedroom gave her a quick shiver of pleasure.
Stop it, she told herself. Let’s not get ahead of the game. Okay? Just chill.
“Looks good,” Jessica pronounced as she returned to the living room and pulled Sydney out of her own head. The cat tower caught her eye and she pointed at it. “That’s a nice touch. She’ll love it.”
“Good.” Sydney squatted down so she could look into the carrier. “Hi there, Ella. You ready to see your new home?” The cat blinked at her with those enormous green eyes and yawned, her pink tongue curling out like a New Year’s Eve party horn. With a chuckle, Sydney glanced up at Jessica. “Is it okay?”
“Go for it.”
Sydney opened the door to the carrier. She took her sweet time about it, but Ella finally stepped out, took a look around. “What do you think?” Sydney asked the cat quietly.
She wandered the apartment as both women watched, sniffing here and there, poking her head into corners. Nose to nose, she stood in front of Millie, almost like they were having some sort of telepathic conversation. Then she went into the bedroom and Sydney and Jessica looked at each other, Sydney in slight panic.
“It’s fine,” Jessica said. “Give her a minute.”
In less than that, she was back out, not walking so much as strolling. She stopped at the cat tower, gave it a sniff, looked up at the top platform. Then she leapt up, turned in one circle, settled in and made herself comfortable in the evening sunshine. Her purr could be heard across the room. Millie settled down on the floor at the base of the tower, put her head down, and closed her eyes. Sydney and Jessica looked at each other for a beat before they both laughed, their relief obvious. Before either could utter a word, the doorbell buzzed.
“That’s dinner,” Sydney said. “I hope you like Chinese.” She’d taken a chance, as she didn’t know anybody who didn’t like Chinese.
“I do.”
“Be right back.” Sydney grabbed her wallet and treated the trip down the stairs as an opportunity to find her footing, take a breath. Jessica was here; that’s all Sydney needed. Next up, be honest. Be open. Be transparent. She opened the door, paid the delivery guy, and took the two bags back up. In the apartment, she was surprised to find Jessica pouring the wine.
That seems like a good sign.
Sydney put the bags on the counter, got plates, and pulled things out. They worked together in companionable silence, sharing the rice, the cashew chicken, the vegetable lo mein, the egg rolls. Once their plates were loaded up and they each had a glass of wine, they moved by unspoken agreement to the couch and set their dishes on the coffee table.
“To Ella’s new home,” Jessica said, as she held up her glass. “And don’t let me forget that I have some paperwork for you. Just some basic information about owning a cat, things to look out for, her medical records, that kind of thing.”
Sydney gave a nod and said, “To you being here. To us being here together. To you not tossing me out of the shelter on my ass.” She partnered her words with her best crooked, self-deprecating grin.
“Yeah, well, it was touch and go for a minute there.” But Jessica was softly smiling.
They touched glasses and sipped.
The food was excellent, which they both mentioned. Finally, Jessica asked the question that opened up the subject once and for all. “So…what brought you back to the shelter?”
“You did.” It was a simple answer. And the truth.
Jessica squinted at her. “What does that mean, Sydney?”
Sydney took a deep breath. “I’ve done a lot of soul searching over the past six or so weeks. A lot of soul searching.”
“Yeah? How come?”
“Because I needed to. Because it was about time.” Sydney took a sip of wine. “Do you know what a self-fulfilling prophecy is?”
“Of course.”
“Well, I think that’s what I was creating for myself.”
Jessica chewed her egg roll and studied Sydney’s face. Sydney did her best not to shift and squirm under such scrutiny. Especially from this woman. “How so?”
Another deep breath. Who knew you needed so much air to have a deep conversation? “I know I’ve mentioned it before, but my parents are…less than present in my life. It’s been that way since I was old enough to stay home alone, so it’s normal for me. I’m used to being alone and I’m fine with it. I can take care of myself. I’ve never needed anybody.”
Jessica nodded, put a forkful of rice in her mouth, her eyes steadily on Sydney’s.
“I’ve created not only a solitary life for myself, but a…nomadic one, for lack of a better phrase. And that never gave me pause until I was here.”
“Really?”
Sydney shook her head. “Never. It was always just…who I am. And then I met you and I assumed you’d just be a fun distraction for a bit.” She looked sheepishly at Jessica. “No offense.”
Jessica shrugged.
“But when you left here that night…”
Jessica grimaced and nodded once.
“It really made me stop in my tracks.”
“But you never called. You didn’t
come after me. You didn’t even ask me to stay. You just…let me go.”
“I know.” Sydney looked down at her plate, set down her fork, her appetite waning a bit. “I know, and I am so sorry about that. That was a big mistake. Big. Huge.”
Jessica squinted at her. “Are you quoting Pretty Woman at me in the middle of a serious conversation?”
“I am.” Sydney grimaced. “I’m sorry. Just trying to lighten the mood.”
Jessica set her fork down and shifted so they were face to face on the couch. “How about you just talk to me?”
“I can do that.”
“Good. Where were we? Oh, right. You didn’t come after me, didn’t text, didn’t call. For weeks. We were there.”
“Right.” Okay, so she’s a little bitter. That’s to be expected. Sydney swallowed. “I got to thinking about things after I talked to Laura. I told her what had happened between us and she pointed out some fairly obvious things about my life that I never really paid attention to. Most importantly, that I am always looking for a place to belong, yet I never let myself stay in that place long enough for it to feel that way. And I’d like to change that.” She blew out a breath. “There. I said it.”
She waited.
A beat passed.
Two.
Jessica took a sip of her wine, her eyes on Ella, still lounging in her tower. “That was hard for you to say,” she said matter-of-factly.
“Yeah. I’ve never actually said it out loud before.”
Another beat passed.
“So now what?” Jessica’s eyes were on her now, intently. She sipped her wine, never looking away. “Why am I here?” It was a valid question, but she seemed less…angry? And that was good. Sydney would take that. “And when are you headed to Austin? Or wherever the next place happens to be?”
“I passed on Austin.”
Jessica blinked at her. “You what?”
“They offered me a job and I said thank you, but no thank you.”
Jessica blinked some more, wine glass stopped halfway to her lips. “But…why? You were so anxious to get the hell out of here.”
Dare to Stay (Puppy Love Romances Book 3) Page 26