SEAL My Destiny (SEAL Brotherhood)

by Sharon Hamilton

  Tyler, Rory and a new guy were in the middle of the pack. On cue they turned on their backs and eyed Jones and Luke bringing up the rear. Apparently satisfied, the trio rolled over to their bellies again and took off, leaving him and Jones behind.

  At one of the light buoys Fredo, turned and then headed back. He didn’t look up when he passed Jones and Luke going in the opposite direction, but did give them the finger.

  They swam for nearly an hour. Luke knew the others didn’t much want to be in the water, and were probably cold as he was, but they were making damned sure Luke worked off some of the negative energy he hadn’t been able to conceal. They were probably cussing him out, he thought. But the simple act of taking him on this swim and not leaving him alone in his misery was what you did for one of your own. Nobody got left behind.

  Ever.

  The sand of the little park glowed white in the moonlight when he and Jones collapsed next to each other, staring up at the stars until they could catch their breath. It felt good to be totally exhausted.

  Luke knew he’d be able to get a good night’s sleep now. Maybe even sleep in, if he could keep his room dark enough. Tyler punched Luke in the arm with a “Later, dude,” but his arms were so frozen, he barely felt the sting.

  The others climbed into several vehicles and began to leave the parking lot. Fredo hung back.

  “Luke, maybe you fuckin’ come on over to my place for the evening, okay?” the short Mexican SEAL barked it more like an order than a question. “Mia’s gone to PV with her girlfriends until the weekend. I could use the fuckin’ company.”

  “Nah, I’m good,” Luke said.

  “I think, if it’s all the same to you, tonight you should come over. Shit, my place is way more quiet than yours.”

  “You fuckin’ don’t have to keep an eye on me, Fredo. But I appreciate it.”

  “Shit, Luke. I’m gonna sleep, not watch your sorry ass. Just come over, okay?”

  “But I sleep better in my own fuckin’ bed, Fredo. Just leave me the fuck alone.” There was no point in asking Fredo to come to his place, since he didn’t have a couch, and it was out of the question for two SEALs to share the same bed. So he would have to give up his bed for the floor.

  “You call Kyle in the AM then, my man,” Fredo commanded.

  “Roger that.”

  Fredo had finished drying off with his Hawaiian shirt. Then he slipped it over his shoulders and wet undershirt. At least their pants were dry, but wouldn’t be for long, since their wet boxers would soon soak through. It did kind of guarantee Fredo that Luke wouldn’t be making the rounds of the bars on Coronado Island, not with pants looking like he’d pissed them. Going home to change and then returning to the party scene just seemed like too much damned work.

  “You call me if you get any fuckin’ thoughts.”

  “Doubt I will. I’m fuckin’ completely spent,” Luke said.

  “No, not technically,” Fredo objected. “Spent is after you’ve fuckin’ been with your woman for a few hours, bro.” Fredo punched him in the arm. “You good?”

  “Fuckin’ fantastic. Not fuckin’ cold either,” Luke lied back to him, which was the answer Fredo had probably been looking for.

  And like a good pair of shoes he’d misplaced and suddenly found, he was relieved he was able to sync in with Fredo and the other SEALs in the use of the word fuck, and mean it.

  It was a very fuckin’ good sign.

  Chapter 23

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  JULIE MADE IT into her apartment, lugging the rolling duffel behind her. The bridesmaid dress was in a bag slung over one arm. The chiffon made the crinkled paper noise, which still sent a shiver up her spine, in spite of the ache in her heart.

  She managed to smile at a couple walking past, hand in hand. She told herself she was okay with seeing lovers. This wouldn’t bother her, she was “fine”—the word seemed to brush aside painful emotions, and although it made her tense, she felt more in control.

  That is, until she closed her front door. Dropping the dress bag on the floor, she released the duffel handle and let it flip forward. She slumped to the floor next to it. When she saw the vacantness of her normally bright and cheerful apartment, she nearly burst into tears. She hadn’t turned on the lights, but water from the large pool area below was reflected on her walls, and she could see lights at the little harbor beyond and the Bay glistening under a full moon.

  She righted herself, but stayed seated, watching moonbeams dance like faerie wings against the apartment walls. Tall palm fronds waved outside her balcony slider, their shadows clacking to an unknown rhythm against the sheet-rocked walls.

  That’s when the tears came. And when they came, her chest heaved, and her inhales were choppy, like she couldn’t get enough air. The vacant hole in her heart was unbearable. She’d told herself it would be hard, but damn, she didn’t expect it would be this hard. There was no way she would be “fine” today.

  She’d told him she’d stay the course, and all she asked in return was for him to not walk out, not give up on them.

  But that’s exactly what he’d done. And no matter how much she ached, she knew the only thing for her to do was set aside the pain, and throw herself back into her classes. She had things to prepare for the brief summer session she was scheduled to teach, and she’d offered to do it so she could help some of her struggling students.

  In the dark, and all alone, she vowed it was time to get busy and not pine for him. After all, there was no future with Luke, and thus it wasn’t helpful to keep brooding about it. Eventually the feeling part would fade and she’d be able to see him again at family gatherings or hear about him and not feel the hole in her chest yawn open again. But she vowed, sitting on the floor watching the reflections of the night and water lights, someday the right guy would come along. He’d be the real deal, the real package, and he’d be available to her.

  Because Luke was not and might never be.

  JULIE’S SUMMER SCHOOL session was due to start in a week. She kept her appointment with the principal the next morning to go over a couple of items he’d wanted to discuss prior to classes starting. She needed to get her room in shape for the new class, simplify it by removing some of her history and math modules. It was going to be a combined group of slow readers from second through fourth grades. Slow readers had trouble focusing and concentrating sometimes, and too much stimulation could be counterproductive.

  Dr. Connors was early, and poked his head into the room as she was removing a large math chart.

  “There you are, Julie. Mind if we have a little talk?”

  Julie stepped down off the wooden chair, rolled up the chart and placed it in a large white storage tube with her other posters. “Sure,” she said, dusting her palms together. “You want to sit here?” She offered him her desk chair.

  “Um,” He was searching her walls, trying to be casual, but Julie could see he was a bit tense. “Let’s go into my office. Then we can speak freely.”

  Which was alarming. She was uneasy that he’d wanted privacy. But, unlike some of his colleagues, Dr. Connors wasn’t especially close to any of his teachers, so they’d all gotten used to his more formal ways without reading anything into it. Still, it was obvious he had something on his mind.

  A cold wind whooshed down the concrete halls of the nearly abandoned school. The parking lot had only a handful of cars. It would get busier later in the week, when those teaching summer school returned to do their prep work. It would get the busiest just before school began in earnest in the fall.

  She followed the principal, who had a runner’s build and a loping gait. He didn’t walk with her, so she followed behind and said not a word.

  After sitting behind his desk, he motioned for her to take the chair she always sat in for his one-on-one discussions. Although she tried to engage him, his lack of eye contact was disturbing.

  He leaned back, linking his fingers behind his head and glanced at the ceiling while he inhaled. At last he ca
me forward, placing his forearms on the desk, and leveled a look at her, which froze her.

  “The Millers are going to be a problem, Julie.” He searched her face, lips pursed, and a slight frown to his bushy eyebrows. “The District does not want a lawsuit, but it’s beginning to look like things are headed there.”

  Julie was surprised at the term “lawsuit,” but wasn’t surprised to learn the Millers would be a bigger problem than Connors had hoped. They’d given the sweet, elderly kindergarten teacher a hard time, too. The first grade teacher had left early in the school year to have a baby. The long-term sub never had a chance. It was her first year of teaching. Dr. Connors, who had himself just arrived this year, knew about the previous years of complaints about the Millers, but for some reason didn’t take them seriously enough, Julie thought.

  Until now.

  “I just don’t see how they could have much of a case, Dr. Connors. I really don’t.”

  “Well, just defending the district against accusations is expensive and isn’t what we want to do. I have negotiated something I hope will help defuse the situation.” Now Connors was beginning to look smug. Julie didn’t think she was going to like anything he said next. And she didn’t.

  “I’ve told them she will pass to the third grade, provided she gets some special tutoring this summer.”

  “I think it’s an excellent idea, Dr. Connors.” Julie was actually relieved before she noticed he was eyeing her carefully.

  “Mr. Miller wants her in your classroom this summer.”

  “But—” Connors wouldn’t let her continue.

  “And he says he’ll pay for extra tutoring, if it is you who does the instruction, so it dovetails into the curriculum here.”

  Julie stood. “No. You have to understand how this could be. They’ve already complained about my teaching methods. I think another—”

  “I’ve already agreed to it,” Connors stated flatly.

  “But not the tutoring. Surely not the tutoring.”

  “That, too, although you two can negotiate the times and salary.” He got up and came over to stand next to her. “This is your opportunity to make things right, Julie. In order to keep your job, I’m asking you to do this for the District, and for yourself. Consider your career.”

  “But my union rep—”

  “Has already been contacted.”

  THIS WAS SO wrong on so many levels. She left a message for her rep, who wasn’t answering. She called a co-worker and didn’t get an answer, either. She lingered around the doorway of another teacher who was also preparing her room for summer school, but all three of the kids in the classroom with her were helping. Julie didn’t want to expose them to anything about the Millers.

  She returned to her room, quickly removed the remainder of the items she’d planned to take down, stored them, and left.

  Mr. Miller was leaning against her car in the parking lot as if he’d been waiting for her. She was so surprised by his boldness, it took her a minute to compose herself.

  He remained perched there, in a somewhat triumphant manner, legs crossed at the ankles, his eyebrows raised in defiance of anything she would say, and his lips in a flat, smug line. His arms were crossed, too, and he looked at her with a slight tilt of his head.

  He must have seen her flinch and noticed her expression change. Squinting into the sunlight, she hoped if she blinked he might disappear.

  But he was no vision.

  “Mr. Miller, what can I do for you?”

  “Julie,” his voice started out so syrupy sweet it made her teeth ache. “I want you to know I’m very happy you’ve accepted my offer.”

  “Your offer?” How could this man possibly believe he was offering her anything worthwhile?

  “Yes. My offer to drop the lawsuit if you agree to tutor my daughter.”

  “Unfortunately, it would be outside the school’s jurisdiction.”

  “I’m glad to hear you say so. I was hoping we wouldn’t have to conduct the tutoring on school grounds.”

  His comments weren’t adding up. “Mr. Miller, I’ve agreed to be her teacher this summer. I haven’t agreed to anything else.”

  “On the contrary. The District’s representative assured my attorney you had agreed to some private tutoring.”

  “I told my principal I’d consider it. We have yet to work out the terms.”

  “Which is why I’m here.” He feigned cooperation and reasonableness.

  He stood up, hands relaxed by his sides. His smile showed he could be charming, in an evil sort of way. Julie was sincerely afraid of him. She checked her surroundings, using her peripheral vision without turning her head or giving away her intentions, but she was concerned there was only one other car in the parking lot. Mr. Miller’s Lexus SUV was parked right behind hers, actually blocking her unless she drove across the landscaping.

  Miller was dressed in blue jeans and light blue shirt. His well-worn cowboy boots made him move in a dangerous-looking saunter when he came towards her. He stopped just before she would have to back up to avoid touching. She backed up anyway, putting a clear two feet between them, which wasn’t enough.

  She was grateful for the papers she hugged to her chest, grateful there was a little traffic on the road in front of the school. She knew some of the boys would be coming by for basketball practice soon, unless it was cancelled for the summer, so there would be parents in and out of the parking lot.

  If she could just get to her car and lock the doors.

  Miller looked at her like a piece of meat. She didn’t want to meet his gaze, but he kept following her face around, demanding eye contact. She didn’t give him the satisfaction. His shoulders were powerful, and she realized for the first time he was very tall, perhaps six foot three or so.

  Most of the times she’d met him, she realized, he’d been seated and so had she. Also, his wife wasn’t in the SUV, so the two of them were alone.

  “Look, Julie,” he said with raspy charm. His eyes were roaming all over her hair. He was trying to use a softer approach, and for a second she thought he might reach out to hug her or touch her cheek. The attraction vibe she got made her sick to her stomach. “There’s no need to make this difficult. I’m sure if we cooperate with each other, we can come to some reasonable arrangement. All I want is for my daughter to have the very best education possible.”

  No, sir, something else is going on here.

  “But Corey is getting the best education possible, if you and your wife would only stop interfering.” Julie thought her position was obvious.

  He paused, blinked several times, as if he’d been verbally slapped and hadn’t expected it. “Now, there’s where you’re wrong, Julie. Our little Corey is quite a special child and she requires special treatment.” He moved closer, but Julie took a backward step in tandem, maintaining the two-foot distance between them.

  “Mr. Miller, I’m not comfortable discussing this here, or right now. Perhaps we can make an appointment for another day this week, before school starts? I’d like you to bring your wife as well, and I’ll have my principal or another colleague sit in so we can, all four of us, put our heads together.”

  “What an excellent suggestion,” he said, and his eyes lit up. “This is a very promising start. How about tomorrow? Say, noon?”

  “Noon would be fine. I’ll have to check with my principal.”

  “But you can find someone else if he’s not available?”

  “Yes.” Julie was confident someone would be willing to help her out. She hoped her rep would be that someone.

  “I’m very happy you’ll be helping our little Corey with her studies, Julie,” he said while he extended his hand. Julie did not take his hand, but instead walked around to the other side of her car, tweeted it open, got in and started the ignition. She quickly locked the doors with the touch of a button. She hoped he didn’t notice. His little grin and three-finger wave didn’t mask her abiding fear that he’d noticed everything and knew how afraid of him she
was.

  Chapter 24

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  JULIE WAS SO worried about the upcoming meeting with the Millers, she hadn’t gotten much sleep. She also was uncomfortable because no one had called her back. Out of options, she dialed one of her non-teacher friends.

  “Jules, I’m sorry, but I’ve got to be at work at nine, and was planning on working through lunch.”

  “Not today. Gosh if you’d given me a couple days’ notice, no problem,” another one of her friends said.

  She dialed her principal at school, and this time got a recording saying he’d be out of the office until Friday.

  You chicken shit. Set me up, and then leave.

  Her rep finally called just when she was leaving for the classroom. “Julie, I’ve got another meeting at eleven. If I can get out of it early I’ll zip across town and come join you. Can’t say for sure I’ll be on time, and I might get tied up.”

  “Thanks, Noreen.”

  “Listen, if you’re so worried about it, I’d reschedule,” Noreen said.

  Julie checked her gut, looking out at the beautiful, cloudless morning. When it was beautiful, and it was like this most days, all things were possible. She wondered if it wasn’t just her fatigue from the long drive, and her stress over the scar on her heart. The term lovesick came readily to mind.

  Taking in a deep breath, she said, “You’re right. I’m probably being more paranoid than I need to be. I’ll just get it over with and then, if we can’t come to terms and I think I need you, I’ll tell them I need to think it over first.”

  “You know this is private stuff. Not something I have any jurisdiction to oversee, anyway. But I do think Connors has come up with a creative solution, plus you’ll make a little extra money. That doesn’t hurt, right? And you’d be in the perfect position to make a recommendation to the district for next year.”