Always the Hero

by Anna J. Stewart

  He scrubbed a hand down his face. “You’re wrong about so many things.”

  “What am I wrong about?” She slammed her hands on the table and shot to her feet. “What did I get wrong? All this time, this hasn’t been about being with me. It hasn’t been about my feelings or what I want. It’s been about a promise you made and we both know Matt Knight does whatever he has to in order to keep a promise. Unless, it seems, that promise has been made to me.”

  Something in her tone broke through the haze in his mind. “You told me if I changed my mind about taking Kyle in you’d lose all respect for me. Do you remember saying that?”

  “Of course I do. That’s not what this is about.”

  “Yes, it is. What would you have had me do? When we first started seeing each other, you would have shut me down immediately if I’d told you. And yes, I needed someone in my life to prove I’m capable of maintaining a relationship. I needed stability and I’m sorry to tell you, Lori, but you’re a stabilizing influence. Even if the only reason I did start seeing you again was to get Kyle, it doesn’t change the fact that I fell in love with you.”

  “And I’m supposed to believe that why? Because I’m lonely and desperate for someone to love me? Because I let myself believe you wanted a future with me and Kyle was the bonus?”

  “You’re supposed to believe it because it’s the truth.”

  “As if I can believe anything that comes out of your mouth.” She tossed the letter aside and grabbed her bag. “I’m not weak anymore, Matt. I’m not so insecure that I’m willing to be with someone who didn’t see me as anything more than a convenience who never even rated the truth.”

  “No, you’re not weak. You never were.” Matt caught her arm as she tried to stalk past him. “What you are is scared. What you’ve found is a bump in the road you’d rather get stuck on than try to work over. You know what I just realized? Once you read that letter, it didn’t matter what I said, you weren’t going to believe me. Did it occur to you you’re looking for an excuse to destroy this? That maybe you’ve set your standards so high no one will ever be able to meet them? I’ve told you everything there is to say. But don’t you dare walk out of this house believing I don’t love you. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have spent the last few days torturing myself over how best to approach you about this.”

  She didn’t look at him. She didn’t move. She barely breathed. She stood there, in his kitchen, his hand locked around her arm. Frozen.

  “You have a choice to make, Lori. You can stay here with me, talk this out, find a way to forgive me or at least try to understand why I did what I did. Or you can run away.” He released her and took a long breath. “Your choice.”

  She stood there, swaying, her jaw clenching as she stared straight ahead. Five seconds. Ten. Twenty. Thirty... Matt’s hopes soared.

  And then she walked out the front door.

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  IF THERE WAS one thing Lori refused to do it was wallow. Once upon a time she might have. Years, months, maybe even weeks ago she would have crawled into bed, pulled the covers over her head and burrowed into humiliated hibernation for days. And with more than a fair share of junk food. As if anyone ever wallowed with a bowlful of kale.

  Things were different now. She was different. She was stronger. So after a few hours of fitful sleep, she got up and got dressed and left the house, sans cell phone because it had been buzzing half the night, and made her way to Calliope’s farm. Her solace. Her refuge.

  Okay, it was her wallowing place.

  She took the long way, bypassing Monarch Lane and anyone she might know who might be awake before eight on a Sunday. The last thing she wanted to do was talk things out with anyone. Mainly because there was always the chance they’d take Matt’s side.

  It hadn’t escaped her reasoning that Matt wouldn’t be the man she’d fallen in love with if he hadn’t done everything in his power to fight for Kyle. She just happened to be an unwitting weapon in his invisible arsenal. But if he expected her to believe he’d ended up falling in love with her as a result?

  She wanted to believe it. But there was just enough self-doubt remaining that she couldn’t.

  “I’ve got a cache of bridges for sale if anyone buys that.” She kicked a teasel weed like she was going for a goal, then another and another. Her stiff and sore calf muscles protested, but at least she was burning some extra calories and cleaning the sidewalk. By the time she reached the bottom of the hill, she’d worked off most of the mad.

  What mad was left, however, shifted to irritation when she found Gil Hamilton in deep discussion with Calliope outside the farm’s gate. She did not have the energy or wherewithal to deal with the good mayor this morning.

  “So you are alive,” Calliope said as she caught sight of Lori.

  “That’s the rumor,” Lori said.

  “We’ve been trying to get in touch with you since last night.” Gil looked more frantic than she’d seen in months, maybe years. His eyes were puffy, his hair tousled and his clothes were wrinkled, as if he’d rolled out of bed fully dressed. “Didn’t you get our messages?”

  “I had my phone off,” Lori said. “I didn’t want to talk to anyone.” Tears burned the back of her throat as Calliope turned those all-seeing eyes on her and let out a soft tsking in the back of her throat. “Don’t go touchy-feely on me, Calliope, not this morning.” She shook her head. “Not today.”

  “Wouldn’t dream of it. BethAnn’s gone missing.”

  Lori blinked. “Excuse me?” She looked at her friend, then to Gil, back to Calliope. “What do you mean missing?”

  “She’s not answering her phone. There’s no sign of her in her house. Her mail is oozing out of that rooster mailbox of hers and the kid who delivers her paper says he hasn’t seen her in days. She’s gone.”

  “Please. BethAnn wouldn’t just up and disappear.” Just what she needed. Drama Queen BethAnn interfering with her quiet day.

  “Have you seen her lately? She’s been frazzled,” Gil said. “I told you yesterday, she’s been acting flat-out strange. I even checked with those friends of hers up at the Flutterby, and they haven’t seen her since they had dinner the other night.”

  “That’s when I last saw her,” Lori said as the first niggling doubt struck. “I have to agree, she didn’t look good.”

  “She’s lost,” Calliope said. “All that she’s taken on since she’s come back—it’s too much. For anyone, let alone someone as fragile as BethAnn.”

  “Fragile is not the word I’d use to describe her,” Lori said.

  “Appearances can be deceiving,” Calliope said. “Have you contacted the sheriff?” she asked Gil.

  “It’s been a busy weekend. Luke’s got a holding cell full of drunk teens, Fletch is dealing with a break-in at the hardware store and Ozzy’s over in Durante helping Brodie with their new computer system. He says he’ll send someone to search her house as soon as they can catch a break, but so far no one’s been able to find her.”

  “What about Matt?” Calliope asked.

  “Maybe she left a note or a clue,” Lori said before Gil could answer.

  “What kind of note?” Gil demanded. “You’re not thinking she did something—”

  “Good heavens, no.” Lori waved off that assumption immediately. “The scandal alone would stop her from doing anything self-destructive. What about her committee members?”

  “They all quit,” Calliope said, and earned a frustrated look from the mayor. “Well, she asked. They quit last week. Couldn’t work with her anymore after she up and canceled all the arrangements that had already been made.”

  She’d canceled everything? “So everyone she was relying on to do the work she’s been overseeing walked out on her, which means she was stuck doing it all herself.” Because things weren’t complicated enough. “None of which she’s capable of doing.”
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  “What do you mean she’s not capable?” Gil asked. “She’s a former congressman’s wife. She’s arranged tons of events...”

  “She had a staff,” Lori said. “You know she fired Jason as the caterer, right?”

  “Well, yeah, but she said he was too expensive—”

  “She fired him because she was mad at me for choosing Matt over her. Jason was donating his time. We had everything arranged, all the plans in place. She decided to start over.”

  “Great.” Gil pressed his fingers into his eyes. “Which leaves us where with the dinner tomorrow night? We’ve got three hundred people rolling in to town expecting a one-of-a-kind outdoor experience. Where are we with that?”

  “There’s only one person who can answer that question,” Lori said. “I’m going to head over to her house. I heard her tell one of the committee members she keeps a spare key in the stone turtle behind the gardenia.”

  “Isn’t that breaking and entering?” Gil demanded. Lori had started back the way she’d come.

  “It’ll be entering. Call the sheriff on me if you want. But at least you know where I’ll be.”

  * * *

  SHE PICKED UP speed and made a right onto Bergamot Road, one of the more affluent streets in Butterfly Harbor. Old-fashioned Victorian chic was what Lori’s grandfather had called it. The homes displayed a touch of elegance with beautiful wraparound porches and lush front yards.

  As the mail and papers were a sure sign something was wrong, Lori gathered all of it up and set it in the corner of the front porch, after which she retrieved the key from under the turtle behind what used to be a thriving gardenia. She heard the rumble of a car as it pulled to a stop outside BethAnn’s home.

  “You really want to start the day with me arresting you for trespassing?” Matt said as he climbed out of his truck.

  “More than anything,” Lori snapped back. “I have a key.” She shoved it in the lock.

  “So the mayor said. Come on, Lori, let me go in first.” He was wearing his uniform and, much to her guilty pleasure, looked as exhausted as she was beginning to feel. He had dark circles under his eyes and whatever light might have shone in his eyes at one time had gone dark.

  “She’s not some knife-wielding psycho waiting for her next victim,” Lori told him. “Besides, if she gives me any trouble I’ll just sit on her.” She pushed her shoulder against the door and shoved. “BethAnn!” Her voice echoed up the steep staircase and throughout the house that smelled stale and dank, as if it hadn’t been aired out in weeks. “Come on, BethAnn, where are you?” She started toward the stairs, then caught movement toward the back of the house.

  “No.” Matt’s hand locked around her arm in the same way it had last night. She stared down at his hand, then up at him. “I mean it, Lori. You might be the queen of everything, but this is my bailiwick. Behind me or go outside. Now.” He put his arm out and pushed her behind him. “Mrs. Bottomley?” He kept his hand on the butt of his sidearm and moved toward what Lori now saw was the kitchen.

  She stayed far enough behind him that she didn’t have to touch him, but she could smell his aftershave, a spicy scent that made her determined head spin.

  He stopped short, dropped his hand and his shoulders sagged.

  “What?” Lori shot forward, grabbed hold of him as she peered around him. “Is she okay?”

  “That depends on your definition of okay.” He walked over to the round wooden table and picked up the empty bottle of Scotch. And then another. He bent down for bachelor number three. “I’ll put on the coffee.”

  Lori stood in the doorway, a hand to her throat as she took in the shocking, disheveled sight of BethAnn Bottomley. She was wearing what looked like ratty sweats and a too-big sweatshirt that was frayed along the cuffs. Her hair was matted and ratted. Her mascara had left long dark streaks down her cheeks. “Oh, BethAnn.” Lori knelt on the floor beside her and took hold of one of her hands. The stench of alcohol made Lori’s eyes burn. “What happened to put you in this state?” She lifted a hand to the older woman’s hair only to pull back at the last minute.

  “All my fault.” BethAnn hiccuped and jerked in her chair. “Festival ruined. No food. No tables. Everything. Dinner. Just went...poof.” She snapped her fingers in the air. “No one. Work with me.”

  “Why didn’t you ask for help?” Lori asked as the aroma of brewing coffee permeated the room. “Open the back door, please, Matt. She needs some fresh air.”

  “She needs a cold shower.”

  “Help now, judge later. BethAnn. Oh, okay. I think we’re moving now.” She scrambled to her feet as BethAnn shoved up and dived out of the room. She slammed a door behind her, but nothing could stop the distinctive sound of retching from eking through the walls.

  “Ah, the sound of my childhood. Brings back such fond memories.” Matt searched the cupboards for a clean mug.

  “I take it you left your compassion in your other jacket?”

  “I save my compassion for people who deserve it. That woman has been nothing but nasty to you from the second she returned to town.”

  “So?” Lori shrugged. “I’m supposed to let her sink into this darkness because she’s a—mean lady?” She altered her language at the last second. “People are complicated, Matt. They aren’t always predictable.”

  “No, they aren’t, are they?” He pinned her with a stare that had her squirming in her maxi dress. “It’s amazing how easily you’ll look past her faults but feel free to sit in judgment of others. I need to call Luke and let him know you found her.”

  “We found her, but yes. He can call off the hunt. Bye.” She wasn’t about to admit he had a point.

  Matt rolled his eyes. “Like I’m in the clear yet. I’m not leaving until you do. Who knows what she’ll pull on you when she sobers up.”

  “Again, that would cause a scandal and even in death, BethAnn wouldn’t tolerate that. Go. Report in. I’ll take care of her.”

  She heard the water running in the bathroom and left Matt to check on BethAnn. She tried the door, found it unlocked and pushed in.

  “What are you doing here, Lori?” BethAnn was leaning over the sink, a washcloth over her face, sounding slightly more sober than she had a few moments ago.

  “People were worried about you. Gil called out the troops.” Lori took the cloth from her and rinsed it out, then handed it back. “You should have talked to someone, BethAnn. You could have come to me.”

  “I did.” BethAnn let out a very unladylike snort. “In a way. I couldn’t stand the idea of you lording my failure over me. Like I need Little Miss Perfect rubbing my nose in what a disaster I’ve made of things.”

  She wasn’t that bad, was she? She’d never meant to make BethAnn or anyone else feel less than. “I think that’s the first time anyone’s ever called me little.”

  That earned her a small smile.

  “I’m not perfect, BethAnn. No one is. We all make...mistakes.” A tiny bubble of irritated anger named Matt popped in her chest. “What matters is that we try to fix what we break. Tell me what’s going on with the dinner.”

  “No one would take the job after they heard who I fired. Who you fired,” she corrected, and leaned over, groaning. “I called in every favor I had, even some from New York and they all said the same thing. Not to mention what they would have charged would put me on the streets. I missed sending in the deposit for the tables and chairs, and then the linens and tents... Everything you and the committee arranged, it’s all gone, Lori. There’s no dinner to be had and it’s all my fault.”

  It was the first real sign of emotion Lori had ever seen from her. Everything before had felt forced, put on. As if she wasn’t sure how she should act around people. But now? There wasn’t any denying BethAnn was fully cognizant of just how much she’d messed up.

  “I suppose all that’s true.” Lori held out her hand. “
Come on. Let’s have some coffee.”

  “That’s all you have to say?” BethAnn must have been in shock because she took Lori’s hand without hesitation. “I just ruined what was supposed to be a premier Butterfly Harbor event and you don’t have anything else? No I told you sos or I deserve it commentary?”

  “I might have a few things to say, but you need to be clearheaded to hear them. Coffee. Now.” She led her back into the kitchen, sat her down and put a full mug of coffee in front of her.

  “I take cream and sugar,” BethAnn grumbled.

  “Tough. Drink.” Lori pulled out her cell phone and set it on the table in front of her. She heard Matt talking outside and tried not to think about the way her stomach flipped just thinking about him. “I think we can agree,” she said to BethAnn, “that you made things far more difficult on yourself than you needed to. You don’t have to be the star of every show, BethAnn. You have to let people help you so things like this don’t happen.”

  “The only reason I took on the dinner chairmanship was because I thought you were on the committee,” BethAnn confessed. She rubbed her index finger against her temple. “I knew I could get anything done I needed to because you’re so reliable.”

  “And then I went to work with Matt and left you—”

  “Hanging out there on my own. I don’t do well on my own,” BethAnn confessed. “As you can probably see. I miss my Edgar. So, so much.”

  “I’m sorry he died,” Lori said.

  “One minute he was fine and the next, he dropped to the ground and was gone. No warning. Just gone. Fifty-seven years old and his life just ended. Mine did, too. It’s just taking longer.”

  “Grief is difficult for everyone,” Lori told her. “I assumed that’s why you came back here, because it was your home.”

  “Except all my friends are gone now. They all left and the rest of you...”

  “You have made it a challenge to like you. You try too hard, BethAnn.” And Lori should know. She’d been trying too hard for most of her life.