Vow of Silence

by Roxy Harte

  “On your hands and knees.”

  I looked at George, unsure that what I’d heard was really what George had said. Surely he didn’t mean to have Gigi fuck me?

  “You heard me.”

  I knelt on the carpeted floor. My belly danced with butterflies, my knees shook and my pussy throbbed with anticipation. I wasn’t as surprised when Gigi knelt behind me as my awake self insists I should have been. I wasn’t embarrassed or indignant. I wasn’t humiliated.

  I was hot for her.

  With fast hands, she pushed up my skirt and pulled down my panties. Her hands were cool against my heated ass and as she ran her palms over my bare skin. I shivered with needy response.

  “You have such a nice ass.” George knelt in front of me, pinching my cheeks as he forced me to look at him. “Thank you for sharing it with Gigi.”

  What?

  Gigi thrust deeply, pushing past my tight anal muscles.

  “God!”

  “Yes-s-s,” George hissed. “Look in my eyes as she fucks your ass. Let me see your disbelief as you come for her.”

  My dream self was so close to coming in that moment. I felt the tugging lift of a pleasure vortex.

  “Oh. Oh!” I moaned. I looked deep into his eyes, not knowing what he saw in mine. Did he see disbelief?

  I saw ownership.

  George Kirkpatrick owned my dark soul, and that thought didn’t frighten my dream-self. It made me inexplicably happy. Happy?

  I came the moment Gigi grunted and the weight on my back doubled. George had thrust into Gigi and she was screaming in my ear.

  The memory propels my fingers to move faster over my clit and I am coming. Again. Oh God! God.

  I do not wait for my heart or breath to resume normal rhythms before calling the airport. I am still panting when I change my flights. I can almost speak normally when I call the last venue, canceling my engagement. I’m done. My artwork will have to be displayed without me present. My grand moment as an artist suddenly doesn’t seem so important. The only thing that does matter is my future with George.

  Chapter Eighteen

  George

  I am both surprised and worried when Lin calls me from the airport to say she has returned home ten days early. “Is everything all right? Do you want me to pick you up?”

  “No, no. I can take a taxi, but I would like it very much if you would meet me at your house. We need to talk.”

  “I agree. God, I’ve missed you.”

  “Do you mean that, George?”

  “I really do. I’ll leave for my house now.”

  “You aren’t at home?”

  “No, I’m actually at the club.”

  “Isn’t the club closed on Mondays?”

  “Finishing touches before the grand reopening, but I’m more than ready for a break and I will be at the house waiting for you. I can’t wait to see you.” When I disconnect the call, I realize my penis agrees, having grown hard with the thought of sex with Lin. I rub the outside of my slacks, pushing it down, promising soon, and am glad for the privacy of my office.

  I rush out of the office, not paying attention, and bounce into a ladder set up in the hallway. I don’t realize what happened until I find myself looking up from the floor. I’m seeing stars and there is a knot on the top of my head. I press my fingers to the injury. No blood. A few feet away a hammer lies on the ground. “Damn carpenters.”

  Of course it is my own fault for being in such a hurry, and there is no one in sight to reprimand for not securing their tools anyway. I get to my feet and rush through the club and to the parking lot. If she has already hailed a cab, I’ll be lucky if she doesn’t beat me to the house.

  But as luck has it, we arrive at the same time.

  I feel myself smiling. Smiling so wide it almost hurts. As she climbs from the taxi, I see she is wearing the exact same expression. We’re just two crazy kids in love. Except we’re both way past the first blush of youth.

  We meet in the middle of the lawn and embrace. We both say at the same time, “God, I’ve missed you,” and then we barely make it into the house with our clothes still on. We strip each other as we kiss and have fast, passionate sex in the middle of the foyer floor. Neither of us takes too long reaching climax.

  “God, George. I used to go months without sex and think nothing of it, but now two weeks without making love to you was unbearable.”

  I kiss her. I know exactly how she feels, even though I haven’t abstained from all sex, and I find myself in the middle of an awkward moment. She pulls back and searches my face. I know she’d like assurances that I was faithful, but I’m not that guy. “I have missed you so much, Lin.”

  She smiles sadly.

  “What’s wrong, love?”

  She strokes my face. “Nothing. I’m just so glad to be back.”

  “Isn’t this cozy?” Gigi leers from the doorway.

  Lin stands quickly, jerking the hem of her blouse to hide some of her nudity. I am more slow to rise and pull on my pants as they make introductions.

  “You must be the primary,” Gigi sneers, sticking out her hand to shake. “I’m Gigi.”

  Lin flushes and glances quickly from Gigi to me and back to Gigi. She doesn’t take Gigi’s proffered hand. “My name is Lin.”

  “Well, I guess I should say welcome home, Lin.” Gigi pulls Lin into a rough hug and thumps her back soundly.

  The meeting between Lin and Gigi is like the meeting of two strange dogs. They give each other cautious glances, size each other up, stopping only short of sniffing each other’s privates. There is an awkward moment when two out of three of us are still mostly nude. “Can you give us a minute, Gigi?”

  “No problem, Master,” she replies sarcastically.

  There are so many problems with her answer, even though she promptly turns and leaves us alone. Complete obeisance would have been a quietly murmured “Yes Master” but she is purposely baiting me. She wants to be disobedient; she wants to be punished, making any discipline a treat rather than a deterrent.

  Lin quickly recovers from the shock of hearing Gigi call me Master and masks behind a tight smile. When Gigi is finally out of sight, Lin bends to collect the rest of her clothing. Her hand is shaking.

  “We haven’t had sex.”

  She meets my gaze, and I can tell by the myriad emotions crossing her face that she longs to believe me. “I see.”

  “She’s staying in the guest room until she can move into her own apartment. She signed a lease yesterday. She’ll be gone by the end of the week.”

  Lin swallows hard. “She called you Master.”

  “It’s a rule of the house.”

  Lin dresses hurriedly, nodding, clearly thinking too much about things she can’t possibly understand.

  “She was afraid to go to her own place. I asked her to come here. I don’t know what I would do if anything happened to her because I was less than charitable. Why do I worry about her? She ruined my life. I should hate her.”

  “You don’t have it in your being to hate anyone.”

  “I sometimes feel like all of it was my fault.” I don’t know why I admit that out loud, but it’s too late to take it back. “She was the child, I was the adult. I made a mistake trying to get close to her.”

  “Lives cross paths for a reason, George.” Looking into Lin’s eyes, I find comfort. She’s so much more understanding than I would be if our situations were reversed. She cups my cheeks. “The questions you must ask yourself are whether you are better or worse for having known her, is she better or worse off for having known you, and make reparations.”

  “How’d you get to be so smart?” Stretching my neck, I kiss her. “Is there any doubt why I’m in love with you?”

  “I am no saint.”

  “No, but you are the woman I’ve been looking for my entire life. You see me. The good, the bad, and you don’t even flinch.”

  “So I am important to you?”

  “You are the most important person in m
y life.”

  “She is even more beautiful than her photographs, George. You should have told me.”

  I pull Lin into my body so that she can feel the stiffness of my erection against her thigh. “The photo you saw was of a child. She is a woman now, changed in maturity, that is all. She is neither more nor less beautiful than before.”

  “It isn’t fair. She is blond and has eyes as blue as the sky.”

  “And you are an exotic Asian princess. I’m certain if you asked her she would say it is not fair that you are so intoxicatingly mysterious.” I drop my hands to her ass and pull her tighter against me. “You are the woman I am thinking about fucking in this moment. Must I drag you into the guest room and take what I want from your body in front of Gigi to prove the truth to you?”

  She gasps. “You wouldn’t!”

  “Tempt me again and see what happens.”

  * * * * *

  Later, lying in bed, I watch Lin’s face as she rests against the pillow. The room is dark, but not so dark that I can’t see her eyes are open or sense her stiffness. “Are we going to discuss what’s on your mind?”

  “There isn’t anything to discuss,” she replies icily.

  I push up onto my elbow so I can look down at her. “You canceled your tour, you came home early and you discovered Gigi staying in my guest bedroom. I’d say we have plenty we need to discuss, unless you can honestly tell me your return had nothing to do with insecurity and fear.”

  “I admit to coming home early because my imagination was going crazy and I did not want you to fall out of love with me.”

  I laugh even though it is the wrong moment to do so. “I wasn’t going to fall out of love with you. I’ve been waiting patiently for you to forgive me—call me—make some gesture to let me know where I stood after our fight.”

  “My heart was full of jealousy,” she admits. “It still is.”

  I bristle a little and she feels it but I have no time to rebut because she immediately accuses, “You threatened to rape me in front of Gigi to prove your love for me. That’s messed up.”

  “It wouldn’t be rape,” I say threateningly. Stretching over her, I turn on a small boudoir lamp, and she makes a sound of distress in her throat that makes me immediately regret my harsh tone. I don’t want her to fear me. A soft golden glow brightens a small area around us and allows her to see my face. “It would prove to both of you how important you are to me.”

  She sits up in the bed and her expression convinces me she isn’t afraid of me. Squaring her shoulders and lifting her chin, she is the image of a ready warrior—even naked and vulnerable. She surprises me more and more.

  “I am here to face my demons, and I want to be with you, George, every part of you. The Doctor Psycho you. The polyamorous you.”

  I narrow my gaze.

  “I mean it, George. Call it an epiphany.”

  “An epiphany?”

  “The only way we are ever going to be happy together is if I come to terms with what your polyamorous nature is going to mean to our relationship. Whether you go on dates or whether we participate together in a ménage. I also have to define my role. Do I want to date others? Do I want to participate at the club? Would I enjoy being part of a threesome? Because I don’t know, I really don’t. Before meeting you, I never even considered such things.” She meets my gaze. “I want to watch you with her.”

  I’m truly left speechless. “I don’t know that I want to have sex with Gigi.”

  She gives me a hard look. “You might not have had intercourse with her, but you have topped her while I was away. She calls you Master.”

  I won’t lie to her by denying it. I also won’t admit anything.

  “Can you see yourself in a long-term relationship with me?”

  It’s far too easy. I imagine her living here. I imagine children with dark hair and almond-shaped eyes. I whisper, “Yes.”

  “Do you have a way for me to watch you topping Gigi?”

  I force myself not to squirm uncomfortably. “I have a surveillance system that links to all of the rooms.”

  “Then what’s the problem? You top Gigi, I watch, and from there we will face that I either can deal with this or not.”

  “That’s oversimplifying things a bit.”

  “But it’s a start in the right direction, right?”

  I can’t argue with her logic, but I feel compelled to make her see the bigger picture. “Let’s assume you are okay watching me with Gigi, what do you see as the next step?”

  “The next step?”

  “Would you consider joining us for a threesome?”

  Lin reacts predictably, dropping her face and shielding with her hair.

  “And if you found yourself actually enjoying yourself in a threesome, would you consider forming a ménage?”

  She slowly meets my gaze and I don’t see the disgust I thought I would reflected in her eyes. She licks her lips. “How am I expected to know the answer to such questions?”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Lin

  George leads me to a small room with many monitors, which proves just how unprivate his home really is. It seems every square inch is viewable from the console. Why am I not surprised?

  “Sit, make yourself comfortable.”

  His request seems ridiculous considering what is planned, but I sit and am immediately drawn to watching the screen that is focused on Gigi’s bedroom. She is sitting cross-legged in the middle of the bed reading a magazine. George moves to stand behind me and starts rubbing my shoulders. Does he really think a massage is going to help me relax? My muscles are drawn as tightly as one of my sculptures.

  He leans down to whisper in my ear, “Are you certain about this, Lin?”

  “Quite certain.”

  “I won’t force her.”

  I turn my face to look at him, putting us nose to nose. “Do you really think Gigi is going to refuse?” I don’t mean to sound angry or bitchy, but I do.

  Standing, he looks down at his feet, appearing embarrassed when he admits, “Probably not.”

  He leaves me alone, closing the door softly behind him, and suddenly I’m not certain. I expected a kiss before he left, even if it was just a peck on the cheek, and I’m disappointed he didn’t. As tears well up, I fight the urge to leave. I didn’t sign on for this.

  It hardly matters that I asked for him to orchestrate a scene between him and Gigi so I could watch.

  A knock on a door startles me and I realize the sound is coming from the speakers not the hallway. My gaze quickly goes to the monitor, and I see Gigi rise and go to the door.

  “Master?”

  I am not very familiar with the lifestyle, but I am not stupid. She sounds sarcastic, contemptuous even, every time she addresses George so. She makes me mad. More so than disrespecting George could. Still, I am shocked when he slaps her across the face so hard that she drops to her knees.

  I hide my gasp behind my hands, torn about what I should do as George yells at her.

  “Is this what you want, Gigi? My anger? Pain?”

  “Yes, Master!”

  She is still on her knees, her hand against her cheek, but the look she gives him isn’t one of fear. It’s filled with hope. I don’t understand, but I know that expression. It is the only thing that keeps me in my chair, staring at the monitor, instead of leaving immediately.

  “Bad behavior isn’t going to gain you anything, Gigi.”

  She crawls toward him, the hope reflected in her eyes quickly turning to desperation. A tear slides down her cheek. “Tell me what to do then!”

  George crosses his arms. He looks angry, irritated. Is this an act? Or is he really as frustrated as he appears?

  Gigi fawns at his legs. “Master! I’ve waited so long to call you that.”

  “Disrespect fills your voice every time you address me.”

  Gigi drops her cheek to rest on top of his shoe. “How else am I to get your attention? I’ve daydreamed about being yours, but you ignore m
e.”

  “You can only be mine by obeying me completely.”

  George looks directly into the camera and I feel as though he is commanding me, not her.

  “You have yet to earn the right to be mine.”

  I swallow hard. He is still looking at the camera.

  “Are you ready to call me Master?”

  Can I?

  I am glad when he finally shifts his focus back to Gigi. He pulls her to her feet by her hair and crushes his mouth to hers but she jerks away, beseeching, “No kissing, Master. Please. I need your punishment. I deserve your punishment. You know it’s true.”

  “I’m not going to beat you, Gigi. No whips or chains or birch. Not until you learn to service your Master properly.”

  “Anything, Master.”

  Oh God. Here it comes. This is what I wanted, right?

  What if I can’t watch?

  They stare at each other a long moment, and for a second I don’t think George will tell her to give him a blowjob as we discussed, but then he pushes her back to her knees. He unbuckles his belt and opens his slacks.

  He wouldn’t have to give the command. It’s obvious what he expects.

  When he exposes his cock it is only half hard, and that surprises me. I’ve seen other men who needed encouragement to become fully erect, but I’ve never seen George with less than a fully raging hard-on. “Suck me, bitch.”

  Gigi opens her mouth and leads his cock between her lips.

  I’m not as offended as I thought I’d be, perhaps because George isn’t acting the way I thought he would. He isn’t looking at her. He looks straight into the camera.

  Chapter Twenty

  George

  The next day, Lin serves freshly prepared spring rolls and a traditional lunch of rice, noodles and both pork and chicken dishes with vegetables. I expect she has spent many hours in the kitchen.

  “This is a beautiful meal, sweetheart. Thank you for putting so much care and love into your creations.”

  Lin blushes at the praise.

  Gigi surprises me by offering Lin gratitude as well.

  We eat, then spend another hour in quite civilized conversation poolside, enjoying each other and the dappled sunlight, the trees’ canopy above the perfect screen against the bright midday heat. Eventually, the banter turns more intimate and reveals the true nature of why we have gathered.