Beastly Lights

by Theresa Jane

  “Shut up, Ant,” Liam growled, taking a threatening step toward his friend.

  “Liam, please,” I frowned, shifting so I was closer to the edge of the bed. I was ready to jump in if the two friends’ exchange became more than just the trading of words.

  “Little touchy there, rock star,” Ant provoked.

  “I mean it, Ant," I was out of the bed before Liam had a chance to let his hands fall to his sides. I got a little tangled in my IV cord but managed to move between the two before anything could happen.

  “Liam, he’s only joking,” I tried to placate him, resting a hand gently on the tense muscles in his arms. I felt him take a deep breath before he spun to face me, anger still etched deeply in his forehead. I nearly recoiled at the sight.

  “You shouldn’t be out of bed,” he said flatly, nudging me back.

  “You shouldn’t be attacking your friends,” I challenged, standing my ground despite feeling unsteady on my feet. My head felt a little light and my legs felt like jelly, probably from disuse since my collapse.

  “Either get back in bed, or I’ll carry you to it,” he warned, and I could tell from the look in his eyes that he wasn’t joking. Apparently, the only one joking around in this room was Ant.

  “I’m fine, Freya. It’s nothing I haven’t handled before," Ant assured me with an unfamiliar smirk on his face. I couldn’t help but be shocked by his mood swing since the last time I saw him.

  “How you have friends will always astound me,” I grumbled, climbing back into the bed with Liam’s hand pressed firmly into my lower back, urging me along.

  “He’s just such a lovable person,” Ant winked, and I almost did a double take. Did Ant just share a joke with me?

  “Have you had enough fun now?” Liam asked Ant impatiently.

  “Why, do you need some alone time with your sick girlfriend?” Ant teased, and I barely grabbed Liam’s hand before he tried to launch himself at Ant.

  “It’s good to see you’re well, Freya," he chuckled as he got up to leave the room. “Good luck with this one. I think he might lose his mind if something like this ever happens to you again.”

  “Get out, Anthony," Liam threatened as Ant looked down at his phone.

  “I’m leaving,” he laughed before tucking his phone away with a mischievous smile on his face. “Ryan is already picking out flower arrangements.”

  “Get out,” Liam growled at Ant’s retreating back. His cackle could be heard for quite some time after he left the room.

  “He’s different,” I mused, settling back under the covers as I felt the drain on my body again. Liam was fussing with my covers, making sure every part of me was wrapped up tightly. Even then he didn’t seem satisfied.

  "He takes a while to warm up to people," Liam shrugged. He gave my covers the once over before settling back in the seat Ant had just vacated. “You’ll regret you made peace with him. He’s just as annoying as Ryan, but more subtle."

  “I like him,” I smiled, and I didn’t miss the one on Liam’s face as he picked his guitar up again. He absently ran his hands over the strings until they started playing out a tune. As if his fingers already knew what to do without any help from his mind. It seemed to be as easy as breathing to him. It reminded me of how my hands could draw without even thinking about it anymore.

  The soothing tune was lulling me to sleep, gently. I felt as if the notes were cradling me and rocking gently into a pleasant sleep.

  I was already drifting, hovering on the cusp of unconsciousness, when I heard his voice begin to seamlessly weave its way into the music. It didn’t wake me, but I was at the point of sleep where his words were embedded in the fabric of my dreams.

  Silence, in every wordLoneliness, in all I heardI never thought the locks had keysThat someone could end my miseries

  Would you run away with meTo hide among a different seaOr would you run away from this andSteal all that we might be

  Chapter 33: The Condition

  “Well Freya, I think you should be out of here tomorrow. If all goes well,” Dr Maxwell smiled, his gray eyes lighting with the good news.

  “That is the best news I’ve heard since getting here,” I smiled as he chuckled. He pushed back some of the loose white hair that had managed to fall onto his face. I wondered how it had become that way considering how young he was. Rather than looking strange, it seemed to suit him, like his hair should have always been that color. “Not that it’s been a bad experience or that you’ve made it bad. I’d just rather not be here.”

  “Yes, if I were you, I’d want to get out of here as well.”

  “So, what time tomorrow do you think I’m going to be able to leave?”

  “Early morning, if you like,” he answered, checking over a few more things on my chart. It was only the two of us because Liam had to take a call. From the look on his face when he left, I was certain it wasn’t going to be a pleasant one.

  “I would definitely like that.” I sighed, eager to get out of the confines of my hospital bed.

  “Thought you might.” He smiled, closing my chart and slipping it back on the rail at the end of my bed.

  “Thank you, Dr. Maxwell,”

  “James,” he smiled, but instead of leaving, he stayed standing at the end of my bed. The way he was looking at me almost made me feel like he was nervous about something. In a hospital, the last thing you want is a nervous doctor. It usually meant bad news, and I had had enough of that for a lifetime.

  “Is something wrong?”

  “No, no, it’s nothing,” he dismissed, shaking his head before turning to leave the room. However, seconds later he spun back with a determined look on his face. “Actually, I was wondering, if it’s not too personal. What is going on between you and…you know?” He gestured awkwardly to the door, and it took me a moment to realize what he had asked.

  “Liam?” I frowned, sitting up more in my bed.

  “Yeah, I mean is there something going on between the two of you or is it all just…theater?”

  “I-I…well, um...” Why would he be asking about Liam and me?

  “Look, I know it’s none of my business, but if there were something there, I wouldn’t want to step on any toes,” he said quickly over my childish ramblings.

  “Oh,” was the only sound I could muster. I didn’t know how to respond.

  “So, is there…something?” he asked again, and I felt my mind turn blank.

  “I don’t know,” I started, my voice airy as I tried to sort through the mess of thoughts that were trying to break through the blank wall in my mind. I thought there was something, I mean he said he liked me and he said he cared about me and he flew all the way back here for me. Does all of that equate to us being more than what we were before? What were we before? He said he wanted us to be more, but what was more?

  “So, it would be inappropriate for me to ask you out?” James chuckled, but I could hear the underlying hurt in his voice.

  “Not to mention unprofessional.” I started at the sound of his voice, and my eyes immediately darted to the doorway where Liam stood. His eyes were blazing, and his jaw was tensed with anger as he regarded the now pale doctor.

  “Mr. Henderson," James said guiltily, looking between the two of us nervously.

  “I think you’re done here,” Liam ground out but remained stoic in the doorway.

  “Yes, of course,” James fumbled, walking quickly to the doorway but stopping when Liam still didn’t move out of his way.

  Liam didn’t spare him a glance but had instead shifted his gaze to me. I felt a rush of discomfort run through my body, causing me to shift under his scrutiny. I tried to ignore him as James tried to sneak past him into the corridor, but Liam made sure to shove him as he left, probably as a final reminder.

  When I realized it was just us, I felt my discomfort begin to grow. I didn’t even understand why I was feeling guilty about something that wasn’t even my fault.

 
“Liam,” I started but before I was able to get another word out, he had crossed the room. His lips were pressed firmly against mine in a kiss that could only be described as desperate and demanding. It was as if I could taste all his emotions on his lips, and they both excited and terrified me.

  I let him kiss me, my body tense in his hold, uncertain of how I should respond. As soon as he pulled away from me, I felt an overwhelming sense of loss. All I wanted was for his lips to find mine again. I didn’t care what the consequences were.

  “Are you mine?” Liam asked suddenly in a raspy voice as he tried to regain his breath.

  “Yours?” I gasped, my head spinning from a lack of oxygen.

  “Do you want to see other people? Do you want to go out with the doctor or do you want to go out with me? Do you want to be only mine? Because I’ll tell you now, Freya, I don’t share.”

  “What are you talking about?” I frowned, absently running my fingers over my lips as I stared at his. My mind was in a daze, and everything he was saying seemed to circle through my mind like water running down the drain. They were impossible to catch before they seemed to fall out of my head completely. All I could think about was his lips being back on mine again.

  “Do you want to be with me, Freya?”

  “Yes,” I answered without hesitation.

  “Then I have some business to take care of.”

  “What?” I almost shouted, reaching out and grabbing his wrist with both of my hands. “What business?”

  "I need to let the good doctor know he most definitely stepped over some boundaries,” he answered flatly, and I felt my heartbeat increase drastically. What was he going to do?

  ’Liam, please don’t do something stupid.” I begged, tightening my hold on his arm.

  “It would be stupid of me not to remind others that you’re mine,” he grunted, easily pulling his arm from my hold. He was already halfway across the room before I was able to untangle myself from the sheets. He came to a sudden stop when someone appeared in the doorway, blocking his escape.

  “What are you still doing here?” I heard the man say accusingly, and I shifted so I could get a better look at him. Immediately, I felt my face scrunch up in disgust. What was he doing here?

  “I already told you my condition,” Liam grumbled.

  “And I told you it wasn’t up for negotiation. You need to be on a plane within the next few hours in order to make your next commitment.”

  “I’ll do what I want, Wyatt; this isn’t your decision. It’s my career, remember?”

  “You’re going to ruin your career if you continue on this course,” Wyatt hissed, taking a step inside the room. I saw Liam’s shoulders tense as his fists clenched at his sides. “You need to be on that plane.”

  “You need to leave,” Liam almost growled, only increasing his manager’s anger.

  “I can’t believe you’re going to let some girl come between you and your music!”

  “She’s not some girl, and she isn’t in the way of anything. I will go back on tour when she is well enough to fly.”

  “Oh, and when’s that?” Wyatt scoffed. “Wouldn’t want the princess to be upset?” he mocked, leveling me with an even darker scowl. “Do you know how much this is costing us? Don’t forget who got you into this business.” What did Liam mean by “when she was well enough to fly?”

  “How could I?” Liam answered bitterly.

  “You’re ruining him,” Wyatt burst out, pointing at me accusingly. “You’ve manipulated your way into his bed, and now you’ve poisoned his mind. You’re nothing but a conniving, fame-seeking wh-”

  “Get out!” Liam roared, moving toward his manager with cold determination. “You will not speak to her like that, ever, or you’ll find yourself without a job.”

  “Don’t threaten me, boy; you’d be nothing without me calling the shots. You have no idea how many times I’ve saved your ass.”

  “Then maybe you need a permanent vacation from all the stress I cause you,” Liam sneered as his body began to tremble. Without thinking, I linked my hand with his, offering him my strength.

  “No, I need you to get your head back onto the task at hand. You’re on the cusp of being more than you’ve ever been before, and you’re going to let that get in your way,” Wyatt spat.

  “No, I’m not letting anything get in the way of what I want,” Liam answered poignantly. He gave my hand a reassuring squeeze, and I felt my heart swell at the true meaning behind his words.

  “You’re making a mistake,” Wyatt laughed humorlessly.

  Liam just shook his head at his manager’s back as he turned to leave the room.

  “I meant what I said, Wyatt,” Liam began, his voice laced with ice. “You either accept my decision or we’re done.” Wyatt paused for a moment in the doorway before he left without looking back, the door closing gently behind him.

  Liam remained where he was for a long time after Wyatt left, seemingly trying to compose himself after the fight with his longtime manager. Yet, all I was able to think about was how he had stood up for me, for us.

  “Liam,” I began, and slowly he turned to face me as he ran his hand through his already tousled hair.

  “I’m sorry he said those things, Freya. He was just angry. I’ve never gone against anything he’s wanted before."

  “All right,” I answered cautiously. Slowly, he led us back to the bed, sitting beside me as he clutched my hand in both of his. His eyes were downcast, and I couldn’t even imagine the thoughts running through his head.

  “What are you doing, Liam?” I breathed, looking down at our joint hands.

  “What do you mean?”

  “What are you waiting for? You have to go back on tour. I get released tomorrow. I’m going to be fine. I don’t understand why you’re still here when you have commitments elsewhere.”

  “You’re my condition, Freya.”

  “What does that mean?” I frowned.

  “I won’t leave until you can travel with me. I’m not leaving you here again when I know that guy is still out there.”

  “But they said it could be up to two weeks before I would be up to flying,” I answered worriedly. He couldn’t seriously be considering holding up his tour for that long. It was insane.

  “Then I will wait. I refuse to leave, Freya. The condition is you come with me, or I don’t go. Simple,” he answered, as if that somehow ended the conversation.

  “You’ve got to be kidding,” I mumbled. “That is anything but simple.”

  “It is for me, Freya.” He shrugged, his eyes lifting and looking at mine with a certainty that frightened me.

  “This is your job; you have a responsibility to your fans and to all the people who rely on you for a paycheck.”

  “You’re not listening, Freya-”

  “No Liam, you’re not listening," I implored, cutting him off in frustration. “What if I didn’t want to travel halfway around the world with you? Did you ever think about that or were you busy making all my decisions for me?”

  He paused for a moment, running his thumb over the palm of my hand rhythmically. His eyes scrunched in concentration as he seemed to consider something.

  “Fine.”

  “What?” I asked, feeling truly uncomfortable with his reaction. His body seemed to tense and relax all at once. There was no way this fight was over. There was more to it; I just didn’t know what yet.

  “Fine.”

  “Fine, what? Fine, you’ll go back on tour?” I asked cautiously. What other 'fine' could there be?

  “No, fine, I’ll stay here with you.”

  “Until you’re sure I’m better?”

  “No, until you decide differently. I’ll cancel the rest of my tour if that’s what you want,” he answered flippantly, getting up from the bed and moving over to the chair. Immediately, his guitar was in his hands, and I was worried he thought this discussion was over.

  “Liam, you can
’t cancel your tour,” I started warily. I felt blindsided by his response. He wasn’t meant to do this. He was meant to be going back on tour. Not staying in New York with me.

  “I can do whatever I want.” He shrugged, and I could feel my frustration begin to grow. He was being impossible, or more impossible than usual.

  “Why are you acting like such a…a spoiled rock star?” I shouted, losing my battle with my composure.

  “I have one condition, Frey,” he answered calmly, and I took a deep, angry breath before I got up from the bed and marched angrily over to him. I hated that he was sitting there so coolly when I was imaging all the ways I could hang him from the ceiling.

  “I don’t care about your stupid condition. You’re going to go on this tour because that is the promise you made to your fans,” I seethed, my arms crossed tightly over my chest. He had the nerve to smirk. My eyes narrowed until they were nothing but thin slits.

  “And I promised that I would protect you and be there for you,” he answered simply, not even looking up from his guitar as he spoke. Maybe I could hang him with one of his guitar strings? Or I could just smash him over the head with it. Either option would work.

  “You’re a child,” I replied defeatedly. “You’re going to let so many people down.”

  “No, I’m not,” he said simply before his eyes met mine and I could see there was something evil lurking behind them. There was no doubt I wasn’t going to like what he said next. “You are.”

  “Me?” I glared. He had to be kidding. “How am I to blame for your deplorable and child-like behavior?”

  “If you just agreed, there wouldn’t be a problem and the tour would resume in two weeks’ time.”

  “Don’t you dare pin this on me. This is your own arrogant ego getting in the way of fulfilling your commitments.”

  “Well, my arrogant ego and I aren’t getting on any plane unless you are right there beside me. So it’s your choice, Frey, what’s it going to be?” he challenged, raising his eyebrows threateningly.

  I could tell from the smirk on his face that he could already tell I was crumbling. Would it be so bad to travel around the world with him? I already spend most of my time with him anyway, and I did miss him when he was away, but was I ready for this?