Beastly Lights

by Theresa Jane

  "Stop,” he abruptly cut me off, his face filling with the anger I was searching for moments before. “You think because I did something nice for you, that what? You have to repay me?”

  “Well, I just…” I trailed off, looking away from his intense stare.

  “No,” he answered firmly. “Whatever you’re thinking, stop.”

  “Okay.”

  "Freya, have you ever been with a man before?” he frowned, a curious look on his face. I slowly turned back to face him with my eyebrows drawn together in thought.

  “Yes," I shot back defensively. “There was a guy in college."

  “So no,” he answered flatly, standing up and crossing his arms over his chest. I looked up at him in confusion, opening my mouth to protest but he quickly cut across me.

  “Did he make you feel like you were obligated to have sex with him?”

  “No, it was my choice,” I answered quickly, but soon found myself buckling under the intensity of his eyes. “Well, he had been going out with me for months. He did nice things for me. Isn’t that how it works?” I frowned, remembering a conversation I had with one of the very few friends I had in college who told me I had made him wait too long. At the time, I didn’t know there was a time limit. He asked a lot, and every time I said no, I knew he was frustrated. So, I gave in.

  “Tell me something Freya, did you enjoy the experience?” he asked emotionlessly, and I shifted uncomfortably, wringing my hands in my lap awkwardly.

  “It was…an experience,” I muttered, trying desperately not to remember my first and only time. I never understood the hype, and after that experience, I wasn’t keen to repeat it.

  “So no,” he answered flatly, narrowing his eyes on me and I remained silent, giving him all the answer he needed to hear.

  “Freya, this thing between us,” he motioned between us before crossing his arms again. “It’s more than a physical attraction. It’s more than a quickie in the cloakroom in some club.” I scrunched my nose at his words, wrapping my arms tightly around myself, feeling exposed.

  “I respect you, Frey. I care for you. I may even love you, but I want you to know and understand here and now that sex is not inevitable. It’s not some prize at the end of the tunnel if I play my cards right.

  "I want you to know that if it happens, it’s for the right reason, not because you believe you owe me something. You’ll do it because you want to, because it feels right and be-because you love me," he finished. My mouth hung open at his admission. I felt numb and confused and completely shocked by his words. Was this the same man that I met all those months ago?

  For my next words, I blame my shock and confusion because they could be the only reasons for me blurting out what I said next.

  “But you like sex.”

  “I like you more,” he replied without hesitation, and I swallowed any other ridiculous thoughts I was about to blurt out. His sincerity was enough to silence me. “So, is that settled?” he asked, and I found myself nodding with my mouth still hanging open uselessly. “Good, now let’s get some sleep.”

  “Okay,” I answered in a daze. Finding myself incapable of moving, I just sat where Liam had left me as he moved around the bed and lay down beside me.

  “Freya,” he prompted, pulling me from my thoughts and reminding me to close my mouth as I turned to face him. “Are you planning on sleeping like that?” I shook my head again, and he leaned up, wrapping his hands around my waist and pulling me down so I was flush against his side.

  “You can keep the shirt,” he murmured, resting his head on my shoulder as he wrapped the covers around us. “It looks better on you anyway.”

  “It’s okay. You can have this one,” I mumbled, shutting my eyes as I felt sleep start to settle over me. “I have a collection.”

  I heard him chuckle lowly, the sound vibrating through his chest against my back as we both drifted off. How had I gotten so lucky?

  * * *

  When I woke, I knew I hadn’t been asleep long, but the first thing I noticed was that Liam was no longer beside me in his bed. I felt around his side of the bed and noticed it was cold. Where was he?

  Frowning, I pushed back the covers and padded across the room to the door, listening intently for any voices on the other side. I realized quickly that I didn’t need to listen too hard, easily hearing Liam’s voice mixed with Daryl and Martin’s as they had what I could only assume was a heated discussion.

  “-before we left,” I heard Liam’s angry reply to something Martin had said.

  “She was rattled,” Martin explained, and I suddenly felt my blood run cold.

  “She wouldn’t let us see the message last night,” Daryl defended.

  “You should have told me last night, I wouldn’t have taken her out,” Liam answered tensely. “You shouldn’t have put her in danger like that.”

  “We were on high alert sir, all the men were,” Martin replied. How many more men were there watching us last night?

  “It’s not enough,” Liam almost shouted, and I heard a loud sound as if he was slamming his fists against the table. “They took her from right under our noses yesterday, and you thought the right option was not to tell me about this?” There was silence after that. I didn’t know what to do.

  I assumed they were talking about me unless Liam had taken someone else out last night. When the silence continued, I decided to go out. I didn’t want Daryl and Martin to lose their jobs because of me.

  Slowly, I opened the door, and almost instantly all eyes fell on me. I almost let my head fall to my chest but instead, I held it high as I walked over to where Liam sat at the dining table again. I was halfway there when I stopped in my tracks. My eyes were glued to the phone he had in his hand, the phone with the cracked screen and the smeared paint. My phone.

  “Uh oh,” I muttered, glaring at the phone that was clutched tightly in Liam’s hand.

  “Was this the first time?” Liam asked in a flat, emotionless tone. It frightened me more than if he had yelled. I stood frozen between his bedroom and the table, thinking of how to answer him, but he didn’t have the patience.

  “Freya,” he almost shouted. “Was this the first time?”

  “Yes,” I mumbled, letting my head fall so I was staring at my bare feet. “It’s no big deal. I mean maybe it’s a wrong-”

  “No big deal?” Liam roared, getting up from his seat and crossing over to me. “Freya, you were kidnapped yesterday.”

  “Yeah, but he let me go,” I mumbled, but apparently that wasn’t the right answer.

  “That’s not the point, Freya,” he shouted before he seemed to catch himself. Instead, he took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. “Freya, this is serious. You need to tell me when he contacts you. Why are you keeping this from me?”

  “I didn’t want to bother you,” I started, shifting uncomfortably, remembering how he had left me alone for such a long time before the concert last night. “You were busy, and I didn’t want to get in the way.”

  I watched as he sucked in a deep cleansing breath, his fists clenching at his sides as he tried to keep his anger under control.

  “Freya-” He was cut short by a loud knock on the door of the suite. I looked at it in alarm, wondering how bad my morning could become if this line of questioning continued. “Finally,” Liam breathed as Daryl moved to answer the door.

  “Who is it?” I asked nervously.

  “The police,” he answered smugly, and my mind immediately flashed back to yesterday and the promise I made. “They’re here to settle yesterday, remember?”

  “Great,” I muttered as a small army of Amsterdam’s finest filed into our room. “Just great.”

  Chapter 38: Whirlwind

  Five hours. It had been five hours since the hotel suite had been invaded by countless numbers of policemen, detectives, and several more security guards hired by Liam. I had answered so many questions my voice had grown hoarse, and I knew we were no
closer to identifying the mysterious stalker.

  I was tired, and I felt slightly violated from the questions they asked and the in-depth search of my phone and almost everything I had brought with me.

  They were afraid there had been a tracker in my luggage, even though I argued if he really wanted to find me, all he needed to do was get on Twitter or any gossip news website. There were probably twelve-year-old girls out there who knew more about my daily schedule than I did.

  Currently, I was curled up on the couch, staring out at the dying afternoon sun over Amsterdam as Liam and his band members answered questions. Much of the room had cleared now, and all I could hope was that we would be alone soon.

  “Hey Freya,” Harri’s gentle voice broke into my darkening thoughts as she wedged herself between the arm of the couch and where Daryl had perched himself beside me. “How are you holding up?”

  She hadn’t been the first to try and engage me in conversation. Jebediah had tried when he first got here, but that only sent the room into a frenzy as Liam went after him.

  He managed to get one good punch in before the police had wrestled the two apart, and I hadn’t seen Jebediah since.

  “I’m just tired,” I muttered in reply, pressing the pillow I was holding tighter to my chest.

  “We’ll find the guy, Freya. He can’t stay hidden forever. I’ve had them relay everything to Marc back in New York. He’s going to try and do everything he can from there.”

  “Thanks, Harri,” I smiled weakly as she patted my leg and got up from the couch.

  “We’ll see you at the concert tonight?”

  “Yeah,” I agreed, casting my eyes back out across Amsterdam. I felt her move away and heard the murmured voices behind me, but I kept to my thoughts, ignoring everything and everyone else around me.

  I just wanted to sleep until all that was wrong had disappeared and I was free to be myself again, away from any prying eyes. Away from stalkers and crazies and anyone who had intentions to hurt Liam or me.

  “Freya?” I felt him sit beside me, closer than Harri had and instantly his hand found mine, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “We’re going to fix this, I promise. No one is going to hurt you.”

  “I know,” I muttered, not even sure myself if I was lying. Did I really know someone wasn’t going to hurt me or was that just another fantasy? An illusion I had created to get me through the day.

  “Here, your brother has been texting and calling for the past three hours,” he said, holding the phone out for me. I took it gingerly, not even bothering to glance down at the messages. I already knew what they were going to say.

  “Thanks,” I muttered.

  “Hey,” he started, sliding his arm behind my waist and pulling me against him until there was barely a breath of room between us. "You are safe with me. You know that, right?” I didn’t answer and instead just buried myself in his chest, allowing him to pull me across his lap.

  His hand was running soothingly from the top of my spine to the end and back again. I inhaled his familiar scent, sending the memories of yesterday skittering from my mind until all I could think about was me and him and nothing else.

  Liam had been whispering things in my ear as my body desperately sought out a place of peace, a place where the world couldn’t touch me. When had my peace become his arms, his words, and everything that was him?

  * * *

  The concert was much like the night before, with screaming fans and heart-stopping, breathtaking music. Liam filled the stage with his presence, reaching every corner of the concert hall, myself not without exception.

  Every time he looked my way, I felt myself fall a little deeper, a little faster, his golden eyes and his vibrant hair capturing my attention and his passion claiming my heart. It was too easy to forget the rest of the show existed, to forget the rest of the world existed.

  “Miss Freya,” I was roughly pulled back from my trance by Martin’s voice as he tried to get my attention. “The band will be finishing soon, would you like to return to Mr. Henderson’s dressing room and wait for him there?”

  “Can’t I just watch the final song?” I asked, keeping my eyes locked on Liam’s sensual body as it moved along with the final most seductive song of his set. I could feel my own bones turning to jelly as I watched him and could only imagine the effect he was having on the women in the audience.

  “Of course, Miss.”

  “And maybe I could wait for him to come off stage as well?” I bargained, casting a quick look at an amused Martin.

  “Of course, Miss,” he agreed, shaking his head as the audience erupted. I watched avidly as Liam and his band thanked the crowd before they all started to move quickly for the wings of the stage where I stood eagerly waiting.

  “You were amazing,” I beamed as Liam pulled me in close for a sweaty embrace.

  “I know,” he smirked. “But it’s nice to hear you say it.”

  “Cocky bastard,” I chided, slapping him across the chest while he quickly placed a peck on my lips.

  “Hey loverboy,” Harri called out, causing Liam’s head to snap in her direction. “You headed out with us?”

  “Nah,” he dismissed, pulling me in tighter. “I have a better offer."

  “Whatever, loverboy,” Harri smirked before she disappeared with the other guys. I couldn’t help but notice that Jebediah had made himself scarce almost immediately after they had returned backstage. I wondered where he was off to on his own but didn’t let my mind linger too long on the thought.

  “You ready?” Liam prompted, and all my attention was immediately focused back on him.

  “You didn’t have to say no to them. You could have gone. I don’t mind hanging out at the hotel while you go out. They’re your band, you should be with them,” I frowned, uncomfortable that I might be the reason he wasn’t spending time with them.

  “I do,” he answered firmly. “I don’t want you alone in the hotel room, and I definitely don’t want you going out with me where someone might take advantage of you being out in public.”

  “Liam,” I sighed, looking away from him. “You can’t do this.”

  “What? Protect you?”

  “No, you can’t hide me away, and you can’t change who you are and what you like doing because you think I disapprove. I don’t,” I tried to be convincing, but I could hear the hollowness in my words.

  The truth was I liked who he was when he was with me. It was the man I saw out with those people, the ones he had surrounded himself with, that I was disappointed in. He was the man I didn’t trust. He was the man that had failed me when I had needed him most.

  “I’m not hiding you away. I’m keeping you safe. More importantly, I like spending time with you. I’d spend all my time with you if I could.”

  “Liam,” I started, but he quickly cut me off.

  “No, Freya, this is what I want, and this is what I’m doing,” he answered with finality. “Now, I’m tired, and I need a shower. Let’s go.”

  I couldn’t do anything but follow as he led me back to his dressing room, the conversation apparently finished in his mind despite it still raging in my own.

  Thoughts and insecurities were running rampant through my mind as I tried to convince myself that one day he wasn’t going to get bored of me. That maybe one day I wasn’t going to be enough.

  * * *

  “You all packed?” Liam asked impatiently from the door of the room. I was just finishing up collecting my things from the room I had barely used. It still contained all my things but like the night before, I had spent the night with Liam in his bed, where he had informed me that he was only going to get rooms with one bed from now on. Apparently so I wouldn’t get any ideas that I could sleep without him.

  “I hope so,” I shrugged, looking around the room one last time.

  “Let’s go then,” he announced, striding in and taking my suitcase from me. “We need to be on a flight to Paris in two hours
, and Martin says the airport is already teeming with hordes of fans.”

  “Really?” I asked. Liam took my hand and led me from the room, handing my suitcase off to one of the staff of the hotel. He didn’t falter in his strides as he marched me out of the suite and into the waiting elevator with Daryl and Martin.

  “It’s going to be worse in Paris.”

  “This is all so surreal,” I murmured, trying to grasp how two days ago I had gone from never leaving the borders of the US to traveling to two different countries in almost as many days. “Don’t you get overwhelmed?”

  “Not so much anymore, it’s a job,” he shrugged, absently rolling his thumb repeatedly over my elbow where his hand rested.

  “I guess.”

  “Are we going to make the flight on time?” Liam asked, looking over at Daryl with a very serious look on his face. It was strange to see him so businesslike.

  “We should make it just in time sir,” Daryl confirmed, checking something on his phone.

  “Good, I have an interview with a news program an hour after we land, and for obvious reasons, I can’t be late.”

  “Of course, sir.”

  “I need to call Lucy,” he muttered to himself. “She should be here.”

  ’She’s pregnant, Liam,” I frowned.

  “This is her job. She should have thought about how inconvenient it would be for her to be unable to travel while I had a tour.” I could sense his annoyance under his words, but all I could feel was a massive wall forming.

  I remained silent as the elevator continued to descend, watching the numbers as they grew smaller and the tension inside of me seemed to build, but I quickly pushed it away.

  There was no time to entertain thoughts like that. There was no time to look ahead into the future. In Liam’s world, there was only here and now and for the moment, I was here beside him.

  * * *

  The flight to Paris and the interview were a whirlwind of lights, make-up, fans, and yelling. I felt overwhelmed by the size of the crowd at the airport in Paris and the speed of everything at the television set.