The Journey (Sanshlian Series Book 2)

by Dani Hoots

  Believe me, something always went wrong. I was cursed like that. Even the simplest missions always went haywire. I could always count on that.

  “When do you want us to leave?” I asked.

  “In the morning, as soon as possible. As for now, deal with Jack waiting outside the door. He’s still patiently waiting. I want you to end it now, Myra. Then Dan will take you to train some more with him.”

  Dan and I stood up. I bowed. “Yes, sir.”

  CHAPTER 10

  Just as Joss said, Jack was waiting outside in the corridor for me. I sighed, not wanting to deal with this right now, not wanting to deal with the ache that was in my chest. I had been thinking of him for over a year, wanting to feel his arms around me, kiss my head gently, but now that I was near him, I still could have that if only not prohibited from seeing him. I should have figured, as Joss was never the sympathetic kind. I had been going behind his back, though, so I deserved it in my eyes.

  I turned to Dan, who was watching Tim closely. I wondered exactly what he was thinking, why he was studying him like that, as they must have worked together already. “Dan, can I have a moment? I will meet you in the training room.”

  He smiled. “Sure thing. Just be careful, alright? Don’t do anything stupid.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “You don’t know me well enough to think I would do something stupid.”

  “Joss has told me all about you.”

  Just as I had expected. I wondered what all Joss had told him about me. “Ah. Goodie.”

  He waved as he left towards the training room. I took a deep breath and faced General Tim Nevo. Faced Jack.

  As everyone else, he changed bodies, which was strange to know I loved a man with a different body. His hair was a dark black, cut a lot closer to his head than I had ever seen it. His blue eyes stared at me, waiting for me to acknowledge his existence. He looked like a puppy, waiting for someone to throw him a bone. Though this puppy was once a ruthless crime lord on Recar, one of the most successful in all the time Recar had been ruled by crime lords, which was quite some time actually. Yet here he was, helping the Empire. Times had indeed changed, but that look on his face never did.

  Damn he was as cute as he always was.

  “Arcadia.” Tim approached me as Dan left. “Can we go somewhere?” He glanced over to the closed door that led to Joss’ office. So he was afraid of him as well. “Somewhere away from here?”

  I nodded. “Yeah. Let’s.”

  He grabbed my hand and led me towards the conference hallway. His hand was warm in mine and he smelled of cinnamon. Quickly we went into a room and he closed the door behind us.

  “I don’t know what Joss told you, but you know who I am right?” he asked.

  I nodded slowly. “Jack.”

  He tried to approach me and wrap his arms around me, but I stepped away from. His arms slowly returned to his sides and he let out a sigh. “He told you not to love me again, didn’t he?”

  I shook my head. “No, it’s not that. This last year I realized that I don’t love you Jack. My loyalty has always been to the Emperor and the Emperor alone. I can’t turn my back on him. I can’t give my heart to someone yet my loyalty to another.”

  It was a lie, an utterly ridiculous lie that I knew he wouldn’t believe. He had never left my side when we were on Sanshli, when I could feel my sanity slipping away as those voices become louder and louder. He promised to always be there for me, so for me to say my loyalty was to the Emperor and him alone, after what he did to me, I wondered if he would truly believe that.

  “I don’t believe you, Arcadia. You love me and I know that. Joss is making you lie to me, I can see that in your eyes. Please, just— “

  “No. This is my decision and mine alone. And my name isn’t Arcadia, it’s Myra. This is who I am now, this is who I should have been all along. All the times we were together I realize were wrong. I realize I shouldn’t have betrayed the Emperor like that and it will never happen again,” I said, trying not to let my real emotions show. Jack was as good as I was at reading people. If I let them show, he would notice right away.

  Tim stared at me, his blue eyes feeling like they were piercing my soul. “If… If he told you to kill me, would you?”

  At first I didn’t answer. I didn’t want to, honestly, because I knew the truth. “Yes. I would.”

  He opened his mouth to respond, but there was nothing to say. I had betrayed him, I knew, but it was the only way. It was the only thing I could do to get him to stop threatening Jack, the only thing I could do to keep him safe.

  “Well. Alright then. I will leave you alone.”

  I nodded. “Thank you.”

  He left the conference room and I stood there, staring at the empty doorway for a moment, taking deep breaths. I couldn’t show weakness, that was how I had lived my life with the Emperor, and through the Kamps. I couldn’t let this hurt me, I had to move on.

  Yet no matter how many times I repeated that to myself, my heart still hurt.

  After I regained my senses, I headed to where Dan was waiting for me. Maybe with all the frustration I had pinned up, I could defeat him by letting it all out. Probably not, but it was worth a shot.

  As I headed towards the training room, I tried taking my mind off Jack by thinking about Wes and the others. I wondered how long it would take for them to figure out I was gone. Wes would probably think I ran off, gone back to my old ways, which I did in a way. Lance would be furious or heartbroken, I wasn’t sure which nor did I really care at this point. Alan’s hatred would just rise and he would want to kill me even more. I shook my head at just the thought of them. They didn’t understand the real game that was being played here. They didn’t understand what was really at stake.

  Nygard needed to be destroyed, only then could peace be restored to the galaxy.

  I knew Nygard was evil from all the stories Father had told us growing up. He had destroyed Sanshli and its people, seeking out revenge for his people who had been suppressed, but the problem was that none of them wanted to gain the power that he so craved. None wanted to cave into temptation. So he killed many of the Illusionists as well, as they were in his way.

  Now, the question was, if I was trying to master my powers, where did that put me? Was I evil as well? Or was it only natural to need to be powerful to take down Nygard?

  This was a question I hadn’t brought up to Violet, as I didn’t want to know the answer. I had a feeling that was why she didn’t want to teach me about my powers: for fear I would turn into Nygard. I couldn’t promise that the power wouldn’t get to my mind. I had done so many terrible things in the past already.

  It wasn’t like what my brother was doing would bring peace either. In fact, I was pretty sure it was just going to bring destruction, more than he was trying to stop. He was such an idiot, more so than he had ever been. He needed to take a lesson from me on how to control his emotions, how to see the goal and never let anything get in the way of that.

  Or maybe that was his problem, that his goal was so corrupt that nothing could stop him.

  I walked into the training room to find Dan working with Jane. Apparently, she wanted to train as well. I watched as Dan flipped her onto the mat.

  Chuckling, I approached them. “Seems you have a lot to learn as well, Jane was it?”

  She narrowed her eyes, an icy stare that I was used to. “Shut it, I would like to see you do better.”

  “How about it, then? You and I duel. It’s been a while, hasn’t it? At least, since last time I defeated you.”

  She let out a deep breath, as if holding herself back from hitting my face with the notion that I wouldn’t block it. “Fine. I’ve grown a lot since we last fought. Don’t think you can defeat me so easily.”

  “We will see about that.” I glanced over at Dan, who had remained silent. “Is it all right with you?”

  He waved me on. “Oh, go for it. I’m not going to stand in the middle of a catfight. I learned that lesson long ago
.”

  I smiled. It was so easy to work with Dan, he knew what to say and not to push me. I liked that and wished everyone would be like him. Then I wouldn’t have to kill so many people.

  “Ready?” Jane asked.

  I raised my hands in the new stance Dan showed me. Jane, or Laura, always used a boxing technique, her fist ready and blocking her face.

  She was the first to initiate the fight. She punched with her right hand then her left, but I blocked both of those attacks. I swung my leg as she punched again, leaving her core wide open. I swung my arm but she quickly regained her stance and blocked it.

  Jane kept at me, punch after punch but I was quick to counter each attack. She swung high and I quickly ducked and backed up as she switched to a low swing. Before I could regain my balance, she swung and hit me right in the jaw.

  There was a slight smile on her face.

  “I didn’t know the Ice Queen smiled. I guess you really must hate me enough to find joy in hitting me.”

  “Oh, you bet.”

  “Well, then. Maybe I should step up my game.” I lunged forward, taking swing after swing at her, but she dodged each of these attacks and punched back, once in the ribs and the second in my jaw again.

  “I’m waiting, Myra. Show me what you’ve got.”

  I rubbed away the blood from the cut against my lip. “Fine. But you’ve asked for it.”

  Before she knew it was coming, I kicked her leg, punched her jaw, and kicked her leg again, making her lose part of her balance. As she tried to regain it again, I elbowed her in the stomach, grabbed her arm, and hit my palm straight into her shoulder blade.

  She backed off for a moment and regained her balance. She swung at me again, but I blocked it and countered the attack, though she easily blocked that as well. I quickly ducked down and slammed my fist into her stomach. As she bent over, I grabbed her arm and pulled her forward, kneeing her straight in the nose.

  Pulling out of my hold, she swung back, her eyes furious. Now she was attacking out of anger, making her fighting sloppy. I blocked her attacks and punched her in the nose again. Blood ran down her face and she wiped it away. Her skin was starting to turn red as she struck at me again and again, but I simply ducked out of the way of her attack and kicked her straight in the stomach.

  She hit the ground, and as quickly as I could, I jumped on her and let my fist come centimeters from her face. I grinned.

  “I think I won this one.”

  “Get off of me,” she snarled. I quickly got off, not wanting to summon the wrath of Jane. She got up and hit me with her shoulder as she left the training room, holding her hand to her bloody nose in bitter disgrace.

  I turned to Dan and smiled. “Sore loser. She never did like losing to me.”

  “I don’t think it’s just you, I don’t think she likes losing to anyone. But she does seem to get angrier when it’s against you.”

  I went over and grabbed a towel to wipe the blood off my lip. “She usually won’t train with me ever. It has been a very long time since she has let me go against her in a fight. I’m surprised she didn’t make an excuse this time.”

  “She probably didn’t think you have been training.”

  “Well,” I began. “She should have known better.”

  “Should we continue your lessons?” Dan asked.

  I nodded. “Yes, let’s.”

  ***

  After working with Dan for a while, I decided to retire for the day. We were to go to Ttkas in the morning and I didn’t want to be completely drained, although I knew I could catch up on my strength on the ship. Though, with him on the ship, I had a feeling my training would simply continue uninterrupted for a time. I had a lot to learn, and once we were back from Ttkas, he promised that he would start training me in learning how to use my Sanshlian powers. I still wasn’t quite sure how he would be doing that, but I trusted him. Joss trusted him, so I would too.

  I made my way down the corridors to my old quarters. I presumed that was where I would be staying, and after Dan told me the room number, I knew it was it. Room 582, just as always. I had that number seared into my brain.

  Letting the door slide open, I found the room to be exactly how it used to. Ordinary and not decorated. Just how I liked it. The couch and bed were different of course but everything else was the same. The color, the layout, all of it. Including the mirror that hung in the room.

  “Everything is set.” I said as I sat down in front of the mirror. I still felt as if I was crazy talking into the mirror, but I got over that long ago. “I am being sent to Ttkas to stop Wes’ attack.”

  Violet appeared in front of my image. “Good. You know where to look?”

  I nodded as I took off my boots. “Of course. Inside the brick, right?”

  “Theoretically.”

  “That sounds reassuring.”

  “You know how these things play out, you know how things can go wrong.”

  “I know all too well,” I sighed.Everything always seemed to go wrong when I was on a mission. It was like my destiny to have everything become more and more complicated. “What happens when I find this thing? What do I do then?”

  “Then you go looking for Sanshli. Then you stop this.”

  It sounded so much easier than it really was. To say ‘stop this’ made it sound like some simple task. That was not the case, not when this legend had been going on for so long, jumping through time and space. It was anything but simple.

  “Destroy the book and Nygard you mean?” I asked.

  “Yes.”

  “Fine,” I stretched. “I need to rest for a bit. Long day of planning ahead tomorrow, along with avoiding the man I love, and lying to a vindictive leader whose ass I have to kiss. It all starts to take its toll you know.”

  She gave me her usual look when I put things so bluntly. As if I needed to hide my true thoughts or something. I wondered if she knew the things I had done in the past, when I was working for the Empire, or if she only knew my life from the moment the ghosts entered my mind on Sanshli. Could she see my thoughts at all times like Joss could, or only when I communicated to her? I hated how so many people could see inside my mind if that was the case. What was Sanshli like in the olden days, when there were so many mind readers? Did no one have any sort of privacy or did they all learn to shield their minds against one another’s prying thoughts? It seemed like a useless power if that was the case. But then again, I wasn’t there, I didn’t know the entire story.

  “Goodnight sweetheart.”

  I smiled. “Goodnight Mother.”

  As she disappeared, I leaned back on the couch. There was so much to be done still, this was only the beginning. I thought back on when this whole quest started, when my brother kidnapped me and made me look for those books with the keys Father had left us. Would it be the same as that? Running around the galaxy practically blind, looking for some elusive legend. I didn’t have Lance this time to help me decode things, all I had was my mother, though that would be a little more beneficial, since she was the one who hid the clues. I still didn’t understand why she couldn’t just tell me where Sanshli was, but I guess the location didn’t follow physics, so unless you were keeping track on where the planet was moving, it was rather hard. Not to mention she wasn’t physical, but just a ghost. She wasn’t actually here, but just a resonance through time. I could never touch her, therefore I could never actually be with her.

  I had no idea how that even worked, if she was alive in spirit or if it was some prerecording. The whole concept of ghosts and how they worked in general, if one believed in such things, was also a mystery to me. I couldn’t help to ponder such things, as I felt I was surrounded by them, both figuratively and literally in the sense of my mother.

  Thinking of ghosts made me think of Father, my Father on Garvner. I wished I could see him again, have him help me, comfort me for all the things that had happened since his death. If he hadn’t died, if we had escaped that night, it all would have been different
. I would have been prepared for what I needed to do, I would have known the truth.

  But there was no point of thinking of such things. I had to move forward, I had to keep going so that peace would be restored, so that I had the possibility of living a life I wanted, not the life that everyone else was forcing me to live. A prophecy, a servant, a prisoner. All I wanted to be was just me. Was that too much to ask?

  A knock sounded at the door. I moaned, hoping it wasn’t Tim, or Joss, or anyone really. Maybe it was the wrong door, maybe they would go away. I waited a second, but whoever it was knocked again. I got up and and used my power to be able to sense who it was through the walls. To my surprise, it was Dan.

  “Dan?” I asked as I opened the door and he walked in. “Thought you said I didn’t need guarding. Why are you here?”

  “Don’t worry, I’m not here to guard you. I was just curious how you were doing, what you were thinking.”

  I studied him, not sure what he was asking. “Excuse me?”

  “About Jack. What are your feelings towards him?” Dan sat down on my couch. I gave him a suspicious look. What had Joss told him about Jack? And why did he care?

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Joss said you used to be lovers, but he forbade you from ever seeing him again. Why is that?”

  I watched him, wondering if I could tell what his deal was. It was none of his business and after these past few days, he should have known that I wouldn’t be very keen on letting him ask these kind of questions. Hell, Thomas and I used to get in fist fights over Jack. “What’s it to you?”

  Dan shrugged, as if he was actually wanting me to talk. “I’m just curious. I am your trainer after all.”

  “That doesn’t mean anything. My thoughts are none of your business. Are you spying on me on Joss’ orders? Does he think he can get into my head through you? Wanting to check to make sure I’m not lying to him somehow?”

  “No, he’s not. I am here on my own. I saw your pain while we were training, I could see that you took it out on Jane. You are struggling and most people want to talk about it. I know you haven’t had anyone to talk to in the past, so I wanted to help.”