Radiance

by Shayne McClendon

  She nodded and he ascended a staircase that was partially concealed. At the top of the stairs, positioned above where the two men worked, he opened another set of doors.

  Stunned, she stopped in the threshold. “Harper.”

  “It used to be a sunroom when my grandparents were alive. It hasn’t been used in decades but I thought the light might be good. I asked a family friend to prepare it for you. Caroline hopes to meet you one day.”

  “Caroline?” Brie was barely able to concentrate.

  “A woman who helped Dad after my mom died. She’s an incredible artist who owns a gallery in Denver. I told her about you when I asked who could make your easel.”

  Squeezing his hand, she let him go to wander the long room that featured an entire wall of windows. Painted bright white, Harper had created an art studio for her complete with a replica of the easel he’d sent her in New York.

  Circling the room, she touched the canvases and supplies, ran her fingers over the sheer fabric that covered the windows, and took in the most beautiful gift she’d ever received.

  Returning to him, she hugged him tightly, glad when he hugged her back. “Thank you, Harper. How did you know?”

  “I noticed if you’re sad or tired or angry, you sketch and it helps you. I’m…not good at emotions, Gabriella. I wish I could communicate them like you do.”

  “You’re better at it than you think.” He smoothed his thumbs over her cheeks, taking her tears with them. “I don’t mean to be emotional. I try to rein it in.”

  “I should have asked you before I brought you here. I didn’t realize it would hurt you.” He raked his fingers through her hair. “I’m sorry.”

  “I want to be here with you and Elijah. I have to work through some things but I want to be with you both.”

  “It’s not a preposterous idea, Gabriella.” She frowned in confusion. “I wonder how different my life, Elijah’s life, would have been if we’d found you a decade ago.”

  They stared at one another in silence.

  She smoothed her fingers along his face. “I don’t know. I’m glad to have time with you now. I’ll appreciate every minute and I’ll abide by the terms, Harper.”

  “You fall outside the…rules we’ve always had in place. I don’t mean to hurt you or be cruel to you. I do like you. I do see you as human, probably one of the kindest I’ve ever known. You also scare the hell out of me.”

  “I know.” Brie was moments from crying all over him.

  “Take some time to relax. Sketch or paint or just sit for a little while and let the jet lag settle.” He held her as he kissed her and she returned it with every part of herself.

  “One of us will come get you in a few hours if you haven’t surfaced.” Smiling against her lips, he added, “Harrison disappeared into his studio set up in the old carriage house for six weeks at one point. My father worried we’d have to commit him.”

  “My mother would have dragged me out by my hair.” It made him laugh. “Go do all the business stuff you have to do. I’ll try not to get paint all over the clothes.”

  He shrugged. “There’s an entire closet for you. Splatter away.” One more kiss and he headed for the door. “Enjoy, Gabriella.”

  As he pulled the doors partially closed, she gave in to the temptation to create. It was the only thing that would settle her mind and her heart. She needed strength and calm to handle the days ahead.

  She loved Elijah and Harper too much to allow her fear and stress to ruin what time she had with them.

  Setting a fresh sketchpad on a smaller antique easel by the window, Brie picked up a charcoal and stepped into her therapy session.

  * * *

  Outside the converted studio, Harper wasn’t surprised to see Elijah waiting. He took him in from head to toe and felt the same love he’d practically forced on his unspoken bodyguard when he was too young and stupid to be subtle.

  He was surprised when his oldest friend took his hand and led him to the small library next door.

  When they were alone, Elijah hugged him tightly. “Well done, Harper. Fucking well done. Thank you.”

  Returning the embrace, he inhaled carefully, taking Elijah’s scent deep into his lungs. He’d been unable to really touch him in months and the simple contact was almost overwhelming.

  “I’ve missed you.” Elijah’s arms tightened around him. “I know why, I understand. I’m trying. I want it to work.”

  “That’s all I ask. Just try.”

  “You’ve never asked me for anything, Elijah. I’ve taken, gorged myself, and never really stopped to ask what you needed.” Gripping his shoulders from behind, he tried to control the feelings ricocheting inside him. “I’m sorry.”

  “We’ll work through it. I won’t leave you, Harper. I’ve loved you most of my life and I need you. I also need Brie. I need what she is, how she is, to show me how to feel worthy of the next breath, the next sunrise.”

  Leaning back, Harper frowned. “Elijah?” The expression on his face frightened him. “What do you mean?”

  “I was at the end.” He shrugged his shoulder. “The night of the building party. I was filled with rage over the woman you’d found the night before. I felt dirty, Harper. I felt out of control and saw more of the same stretching out for years.”

  Blinking against tears, Harper processed the fact that his oldest friend, the man he loved and spent all his time with, was so deep in despair and he hadn’t even noticed.

  He let his green eyes close. “She was clean. I could see it. I wondered if she could help me lance the rage, if she could help me be clean.” Lashes lifting, he murmured, “I love you, Harper. I love Brie.”

  Nodding, Harper gripped his skull in his hands. “Why didn’t you tell me? I almost drove her away!”

  Elijah held his neck. “I know you’re afraid. She’s different from every person we’ve ever known. Try, for me. Don’t make me choose. I don’t want to live without her but I won’t break my promises to you.”

  The pain in Harper’s heart was a tangible thing. “I’ll do anything. Tell me what to do.”

  Pulling him close, Elijah slanted his mouth over Harper’s and kissed him for the first time since the morning in Gabriella’s apartment when his best friend promised to wait for her.

  Breathing him in, Harper gave a gasping sob as he took what he’d needed so badly.

  This man’s strength had taught him how to be strong. His loyalty made him feel worthy. His love filled a heart that felt incapable of it.

  The only thing Elijah had ever taken from Harper was his submission. Even then, he gave back far more pleasure than he received.

  Holding him tightly, the only person he’d ever admitted to loving gave to him again.

  Forgiveness.

  Harper hadn’t known how desperately he wanted it until it was given freely. He soaked up the warmth, the passion, and the safety Elijah inspired. Supple lips ate at his and their tongues coiled together.

  When he broke it, their foreheads met and Elijah murmured, “I’ve missed you, too.”

  “I don’t know if I’ll ever love her the way you do. It doesn’t matter. I don’t care. Let her love you, Elijah. Let her show you the things I’m incapable of showing you. You need her.”

  For the words, Elijah kissed him again, devouring with his lips and teeth and tongue until Harper moaned into his mouth.

  Walking him back, he was pinned to the wall, the hardness of Elijah’s body sealed against him. As a strong hand stroked over his cock, he couldn’t hold back his whimper.

  Their eyes met and Harper whispered, “As much as I want you, Gabriella needs you.” Kissing him roughly, he ground out, “Go. Find me tonight and we’ll please her together. I can wait. I deserve to wait.”

  Lust glowed from Elijah’s eyes. It wasn’t easy to send him to the woman who confused him in so many ways but Harper knew it was the right thing to do.

  Reaching up, he held the face that was anchored in his first memories. “I know nothin
g about love but I’ve loved you every day of my life. Let her give you love that’s clean and good. Don’t forget me, Elijah. Don’t leave me behind.”

  Quiet for almost a minute, green eyes stared into his and strong fingers raked through his hair. “When the time comes, I need you to trust me as you’ve always trusted me, Harper. I need you to believe how much I love you, to know I could never forget you. I won’t leave you behind. I’m taking you with me.”

  Another kiss, gentler than the others and Harper murmured, “Pave the way. Settle her heart the way you did in New York. When she fully belongs to you, I know you’re strong enough to love us both, to protect two rather than one, to take what you need and give us what we need.” He smiled. “I’ll get to work and imagine the pleasure you wring from her. It will raise my own anticipation.”

  Stroking his hand over blonde hair he’d always loved, he gave Elijah another kiss and left the room.

  His cock was harder than it had ever been and as he returned to his office on the first floor, he smiled.

  When he was finally able to come, he hoped his heart could take it.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Breathing raggedly, Elijah took a moment to calm his mind before walking to the studio Harper created for Brie.

  It was an unbelievable gift, selfless and kind.

  The men had loved each other forever and though they’d have to rebuild much of their relationship, Elijah knew it was possible.

  So much was finally possible again.

  Standing in the partially open door, he watched Brie sketch the small garden outside her window. Directly above Harper’s office, they shared the same view.

  It was incredible to see her standing on her own two feet. Her hair was haphazardly contained in the clip as her hand flew over the canvas.

  He’d never wanted a woman with such desperation in his life.

  Approaching her silently, he watched as she paused mid-stroke. Sighing, she murmured, “Elijah.”

  “You’re remarkable.”

  Setting down the charcoal on the small table beside her easel, she turned to him with a smile.

  “Were you worried about me?” He nodded. “I’m better now. I felt funny in my skin. Drawing helped.” Twisting her hands, she added, “I didn’t mean to get melancholy.”

  “You’re human. You adjust faster than most. I love the person you are in any mood, whatever you’re wearing – or not, and no matter what you’re doing. You fascinate me.”

  Approaching him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her face on his chest. “Thank you. I love you, too.”

  Tightening his arms around her, he said quietly, “I need you, Brie. I ache for you.”

  Lifting her face, she stared up at him. “I ache for you…I don’t want to hurt Harper.”

  “He told me to come to you.”

  “He’s trying to accept me, to share you. It isn’t easy for him.” She lifted one shoulder in a slight shrug. “I’d be the same in his place. I understand.”

  “How do you see things so clearly?”

  She shook her head. “For a man as strong as Harper to love you the way he does, that runs to the bone. You’re the reason he gets up in the morning. He doesn’t show that but…I know it’s the truth. I’ve caused so much damage between you already, Elijah.”

  “You haven’t. You saved me, Brie.”

  Kissing her was similar to taking a breath after holding it for a long time underwater. It filled him up, made him feel whole, and gave him a glimpse of true beauty.

  Breaking it, she sighed his name with her eyes closed. He took another and loved the way she opened herself in every way.

  Distracted, she let him back her across the room. He supported her as he laid her down on the plush sofa covered in heavy white linen. The moment they were reclined, she wrapped her entire body around him.

  “Brie.” Her eyes fluttered open and she focused on his. “Do you trust me?” She nodded. “I had a vasectomy when I was twenty and I’d never touch your body unless I was clean.”

  Her fingers traced his brow to his jaw. “One day, will you tell me why you did that so young?”

  She was the most perceptive person he knew. “Yes.”

  Arms and legs tightening around him, she whispered, “I don’t want anything between us. I trust you with all of me, Elijah. Take what you need.”

  He took his time undressing her, baring her to his eyes and touch. He took the clip from her hair and watched the curls tumble around her. Arms over her head, she waited for him to undress. The way she followed his movements made him feel fucking powerful.

  Crouching over her, she smiled as she stroked her palms over his shoulders and chest. “Looking at you is a feast for the eyes.”

  His slid his palm along her side, pausing at the bend of her hip and upper thigh. It was the area of her body that had sustained the most trauma. The scars showed the surface damage but the breaks in the bones of her pelvis and upper leg were what worried him.

  “I’m okay.”

  “The slightest pain and you say something, Brie. Do you understand?”

  Lifting at the waist, she wrapped her arms around his upper body. “You won’t hurt me. I made them do additional stress tests to be sure.” His eyes widened. “I had to know.”

  Pushing her back to the couch, he followed her down. One hand between her legs, he growled when he confirmed how wet she was. “Thank god.”

  “Please, Elijah.”

  Notching his cock at the entrance of her, he held her gaze as he pressed forward. She tugged her full lower lip between bright white teeth and moaned. He worked his way into the body of the only woman he’d ever taken bare and worried about being able to last.

  Finally seated, balls flush to her skin and her cervix cupping the head of his cock, she trembled in his arms. Her snug walls clenched around him and he held her tightly.

  Resting his forehead beside her, he inhaled deeply several times. She hugged him as hard as she could, the sole of her foot stroking the back of his leg.

  “I’m not empty anymore. I love you, Elijah.”

  Raising his head, he stared into magnificent eyes that shimmered with unshed tears. He stroked her hair away from her cheek and kissed her gently.

  Holding her gaze, he started to move. She never stopped touching him, connecting to him, loving him. He knew even if he lived to a hundred, her complete trust and acceptance of him as a man would have the same ability to move him.

  He took her up slowly, steadily, watching her take every thrust and hold her breath each time he withdrew. Watching her face, staring into her eyes, he saw the first climax climb until she embraced it with a gasp.

  Never slowing, he loved her through it, clamping down on every ounce of control he had not to join her. Only when she stopped shaking did he go harder.

  Her slow smile almost made him lose it.

  Bending his knee, he spread her wider and stroked his hand over her skin. Trailing up her side, he cupped her breast and squeezed the nipple firmly.

  Her nails pressed into his skin. “More. I’m okay, Elijah. Take what you want. Don’t be afraid. You won’t hurt me.”

  Inhaling carefully, he raised his upper body on his hands and stared down at her.

  “Stunning.” She followed the word by stroking her palms over his torso to either side of his groin. “I want all of you. Fuck me, Elijah.”

  “I worry about hurting you.”

  She lifted and held the back of his head. “How will I know if I can handle two cocks pounding into my body if I’m not sure I can handle one?” The imagery made his blood boil and he drove deep and hard. Brie nodded. “Yes, god yes.”

  Then he let her have who he really was.

  Fiercely driving his cock into her willing pussy, he watched her breasts bounce with the impact and listened to the small moans from her throat.

  “How desperate I’ve been for you. Every second of agony, of want, was worth it, Brie.” So quickly, she was on the cus
p of another climax and he growled, “Cream all over my dick. Then I’ll fill you up.”

  Breath stumbling, her body locked and she let it take her. He enjoyed the way her skin flushed, the tightness of her nipples, and the way her pussy spasmed around his length as he continued to thrust brutally hard and deep.

  It held her captive for a long time.

  She murmured his name like a prayer. “Give it to me. Every drop.”

  Coming harder than ever in her life, she wrapped herself around him, holding him as close as she could while he pumped his semen directly into a woman for the first time.

  “So hot. I didn’t expect it to be so hot. That feels amazing.”

  Understanding that he was the first man to ever have access to her skin-to-skin made him hug her too hard, still stroking as he gave her all of him, inside and out.

  “Loving you makes my heart so fucking happy, Elijah. Don’t let me go.”

  He couldn’t. He wouldn’t. She made him want to keep waking up.

  * * *

  Brie dozed for a few minutes and woke to Elijah staring down at her with a smile. He pressed his hips against her and she realized he was hard again…or still…she wasn’t certain.

  Then he was fucking her and she didn’t care about details. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known, Brie.” His fingers played with a strand of her hair. “Being inside you, part of you, helps me understand your need to be closer.”

  The kiss he gave her went on for a long time. “I’d like to mention that you have an outstanding cock and it should be inside me often.” He chuckled and took her harder. “Before we get completely carried away, the moment you give me another dose of you, I have an idea.”

  Outlining her plan made him fuck her even harder and it made her grin.

  When she fell apart in his arms and he emptied his balls, Elijah left her long enough to retrieve the robe she requested and then carried her downstairs to Harper’s office.

  Also at her request.

  Setting her on her feet just inside the door, Brie depended on him to close and lock the door while she approached the dark man who watched her in surprise. Elijah sat in a chair on the other side of the room, silent and watchful.