by Shane Morgan
“We’ll Skype often,” I tell Alex, giving him another tight hug. We’re at the airport, a week after my showcase, seeing him and his dad off. Their flight to France leaves shortly and I’m having a harder time than I’d imagined letting him go.
“We won’t be able to talk much even when we work out the time difference,” he says. “You’ll be busy on tour. I’ll probably see you in France someday, though, huh?”
I scoff. “Oh stop. I’ll always find time for my best friend.”
He pulls me in his arms again, embracing me warmly. “I’m going to miss you a lot, Rora,” he whispers at the side of my head.
“I’ll miss you a lot, too,” I breathe out.
“My feelings for you won’t change, no matter what. But I wish you all the best with Daegan. I know you care about each other.”
I don’t utter a word. I only continue to hug him, hoping one day he will get over his feelings for me and move on. Alex is a great guy. He loves deeply. He deserves a girl who can do the same.
“Okay, okay,” Drew breaks us apart. “Can I get some love, too?” he jokes.
“Come here, cuteness,” Alex teases. Both guys give each other firm hugs and slaps on the back.
Chris reaches in to do the same. “You make sure you call us when you get there and the moment you meet some hot babes.”
“Geez,” Emma snorts and smacks the back of his head. Then she reaches in to hug Alex. “See you, sexy voice. We’ll miss you.”
He kisses her on the cheek before she eases away to hook her arm around mine.
“I’ll miss you guys.” He glides his eyes over our faces, as if he’s imprinting us inside his head one last time.
I hear his flight number being announced. They’re now boarding. He glances over his shoulder at the line, and then turns back to me. I see the sadness in his eyes. I also spot the desire to be strong and let me go.
Mr. Fuller nudges his arm. “Ready, son?”
Alex drapes his bag over his shoulder and waves at us. “See you soon, peeps.”
We wave back in sync. He eyes me one more time with a curl of the lips before he finally turns and walks away. I place a hand on my chest because it hurts like hell, watching him leave—the guy who’s been there for me all these years. The guy who always had my back.
Mr. Fuller embraces me in his fatherly hug before taking off. “You be good, Rora. And about what I said, you know? The whole college thing…”
“I know,” I tell him. “Thank you for being like a dad to me.”
He smiles. “It’s the least I could do for my friends.” He squeezes my shoulder then slants to leave, waving at the others.
After both father and son disappear down the passage, we stand at the window and watch as they finish boarding the plane until it takes off.
“Bye, Alex,” I exhale on the glass and make the infinity symbol.
Emma throws her arms around my shoulder and tows me toward the exit behind Drew and Chris. “I guess we all have to grow up now,” she says.
“Humph…”
I rest my head on her shoulder as we walk outside of the airport and make our way across the street to the parking lot.
Emma hops in the front seat of my car while the guys get in the back.
“So, when do you leave for New York?” Drew asks as I climb in behind the steering wheel.
“In three days,” I tell him.
“I bet you already have a fan base there,” Chris adds. “That song, ‘If You Stay’, it’s already getting requested like crazy on the radio.”
“Oh, she does,” Emma giggles, checking her phone. “I’m sure amid her five hundred thousand followers on Twitter, or of her two hundred thousand likes on Facebook, that there are some New Yorkers in there.”
“Whoa, look at you, Rora, our very own star,” Drew raves, nudging my shoulder.
“Stop,” I laugh and wave him off as I start the engine. I pull out of the parking lot and head back to town.
“So, what are you and Daegan going to do? I mean, with you going on tour and him starting the summer art program at Ohio State?” Emma whispers over to me.
I sigh. “I guess we’ll just have to see how it everything works out.”
35.
Stars are the most breathtaking additions to the night sky. Without them, the moon would appear even lonelier. After dinner with Aunt Leah on Monday night, Daegan and I drive out to Wilson’s Farm. We spread a blanket on the grass and lie together, peering up at the sparkling dots. I rest my head on his firm chest, listening to the addictive rhythm of his labored heartbeats while he gently strokes my hair. He drapes one hand around me, nuzzling me closer to him.
“Do you think they’re up there, among the stars?” I whisper. “David? Your mom? My parents?”
He exhales slowly before answering, “If you believe that, then they are.”
“You don’t?”
“I believe they’re everywhere. In our hearts, in everything we do, and wherever we go in life. They’re everywhere.”
I ease up on my elbows and glance down at him, smiling. “Man, you’re so poetic. What guy says these things?”
He pulls me down on him again, kissing me fast, aggressively, and then slowly and with care. When our lips slip apart, he brushes my hair behind my ears and looks at me hard, his eyes darkened by the night.
“Are you excited about tomorrow?” he asks, reminding me that I’ll be leaving very soon.
The question stirs up my anxiety. I move off of him and sit up Indian style, my dress falling in between my thighs. “Can I let you in on a secret?”
He sits up and bumps my arm. “Of course.”
“I’m scared.”
“Well, yeah, you’re leaving your home for the first time and you’ll be traveling a lot.”
I shake my head. “No. I mean, scared scared. Like a rat that’s about to be swallowed whole by a snake kind of scared.”
Daegan throws his head back, stifling his laugh. “Oh shit, that scared?”
“Yeah. It’s so freaking hard to leave this place.”
He draws closer and wraps his arm around my shoulder. “You knew you’d have to one day, Aurora. And I’m sure your parents are thrilled by what’s happening for you. So make them proud and go for it. No holding back anymore.”
Leaning my head on his shoulder, I murmur, “It’s not only them.”
“I told you, don’t worry about us.” He kisses my forehead and lifts my chin to look up at him. “I’ll always be here for you.”
I chuckle. “No, you’ll be in Columbus for that art program and then you’ll start regular classes in the fall.”
He jerks me lightly. “You know what I mean.”
Exhaling, I gaze across the open field, staring at nothing but darkness for miles. I know it’s selfish, but I wish I could have Daegan with me on tour, just to have a piece of home close by. But I have to be brave. I’m on the verge of becoming a woman, and I’d like to be one that my parents would be proud of.
I shudder when I feel his hand slide down my back. Meeting his gaze again, Daegan heaves me close and lowers me down on the blanket. He rests his body on top of mine, caressing my bare arms as he regards my face.
“No matter what happens after this summer, I’ll still feel the same way about you,” he whispers.
I run my thumb against his piercing and comb my fingers through his silky-smooth hair. “I believe you, because, I feel the same way, too.”
Pulling his head down, I kiss his lips with steamy passion. He carries his hands down to my legs, running his warm fingers across my skin. Heat rises throughout my body as he presses deeper into me, devouring every bit of my soul.
Under the glimmering stars and luminous moon, we kiss and touch each other until we’re satisfied and our hearts are full, and there’s no place left we haven’t explored.
Early the next day, I groggily crawl out of bed, shower, get dressed, and have breakfast with Aunt Leah. She’s all smiles, more ecstatic than I am about
the tour. I’d already packed a few items the night before, and Liz, the woman in charge of my image, had arranged to have outfits for me on the tour bus, so she advised me not to bring a lot.
Aunt Leah and I wait on the porch for the car that the label is sending by to pick me up with Luke. Chris, Drew, and Emma pull up out front before it does. Daegan arrives shortly after.
Seeing them settles my anxiety a little. I walk down the porch steps to meet them halfway. “Isn’t this too early for you guys?” I joke.
Chris lifts me up and twirls me around in midair. “Yeah, but we had to come see you off.”
“Who knows when we’ll see each other again,” Drew says, hugging me tightly when Chris sets me back on my feet. “We leave for Cali in a few days.”
“Well, hope you two have fun,” I say with a smile.
Glancing away from the cousins, I lean my head to one side, taking in Emma. Her expression is a cross between overjoyed and sad.
She locks her hands with mine, trying to keep a smile on her face as she says, “Promise you won’t forget me when you become super famous?”
I laugh short and pull her in for a tight embrace. “I promise, silly. Maybe I’ll even take you on tour with me soon.”
“I’d love that,” she says, easing away. “I could be your professional photographer, following you around the globe.”
I nod. “Definitely. Let’s make it happen.”
“It’s gonna suck being alone for the summer, but,” she lowers her head for a second and kick on the stone path, “I’m really happy you’re going after your dreams, Law.”
“Thanks, Ems.” Tears wet my eyes as I go in for another hug.
I look over her shoulder at Daegan, waiting patiently to have a moment with me. A black Envoy slows to a stop in front of Drew’s truck as I saunter up to Daegan. Luke hops out the backdoor, waving at me as he walks toward Aunt Leah to get my bag and guitar.
He pecks her on the cheek, and they whisper something to each other before turning their gazes back at me.
“No more fears?” Daegan whispers, pulling back my attention.
Smiling, I say, “I’ll let you know for sure once I’ve crossed the border and am getting on that tour bus.”
He tows me in for a sweet kiss, uncaring to the giggles around us.
“Thank you for last night,” I say as I step back to look at him.
Turning his head slowly, he presses his index to my lips. “No. Thank you, Aurora. You’re one incredible girl.”
“Gotta go, kiddo.” Luke nudges my elbow as he bustles past with my stuff, walking back to the car. He places my bag in the trunk and then swings around to the other side, sliding on the backseat with my guitar case. The driver peers at me, tapping on his watch as he grows impatient.
I glance behind and wave at my friends. “See you guys.”
“See you soon, Rora,” Emma replies. “Call me whenever.”
“I will.”
Looking at Aunt Leah, I smile and wave at her. She takes a moment to admire me before waving back.
Daegan walks with me to the car. I hug him again before I climb in beside Luke and close the door. Aunt Leah ambles up to the window next to Daegan, my friends behind them.
She reaches for my hand, kissing the back of it. “Remember what I said, you can always come home. But you’re a strong girl, so I know you’ll be fine,” she says proudly, tears welling her eyes. “I just know it.”
A single tear escapes my eye. I wipe it away with the back of my hand then clasp it over hers.
“Aunt Leah… I…”
She nods, already knowing in her heart what it is I want to say. “They’d want you to do this,” she whispers. “I’m sure they’re happy that you’re no longer afraid of chasing your dreams.”
I laugh and cry at the same time. Aunt Leah sticks her head in the window and kisses me on both sides of my face. Pulling away, she cups my cheeks in her hands. “See you soon.”
I nod and straighten back against the seat. I touch Daegan’s hand one more time, slipping out of his grasp as the driver pulls onto the road. I wave at everyone and look behind in the back window at their faces.
For a moment, I envision my parents are standing beside Aunt Leah, Daegan, and my friends, watching proudly as I embark on this new journey in life. Dad would be wearing his wide grin, jerking Mom’s shoulders and hopping from one leg to the other with excitement. Mom would be in tears, saying over and over, “There goes my baby girl.”
When I can no longer see everyone, I turn around in the seat. Luke pats my hand. I look over at him and nod, indicating that I’m all right. And for one final moment, I inhale and exhale, bravely saying farewell for now to Seville. Here I come world. I hope you’re ready for me because, for the first time in my life, I feel as if I am.
Epilogue
Who would’ve thought, that me, Aurora Lawrence, a simple girl from a village in Medina County, Ohio, would have a sold out concert at Madison Square Garden in New York City?
It’s been eight months now since my summer tour with Nadia, a fellow singer from Epic Rock Records, wrapped, and I’ve recently released my debut album, ‘Alive’, last December following the success of my first single ‘If You Stay’.
And now, exactly one year after I found the courage to pick up a microphone and sing my butt off at the Heat Room, I’m about to kick off my solo tour at one of the greatest venues of a musician’s career.
I’m so excited that not only are Drew and Chris joining me on stage again tonight for this life-changing experience, but Alex is here, too. And I’ve learned that he’s been dating a French girl for a few months now. It’s kind of hard to accept that he’s now loyal and attentive to another girl the way he used to be with me. Yes, it’s selfish. I know. But I’m also happy that he’s finally moving on and is with someone who feels the same way.
Daegan is also with me. It’s the first I’m seeing him in days, and it sets my heart on fire.
He gives my shoulder a gentle squeeze as I stand at the side of the stage, peering out at the crowd.
I turn to face him, looking for that feeling of bliss that he always manages to engulf me in.
Stepping closer to me, he swathes his arms around my waist and pulls me into his chest, kissing me tenderly.
“Give them the best performance of their lives,” he whispers as the kiss ends.
I catch my breath, smiling as I say, “I’ll do my best.”
He steps back, but I still cling to his hand.
“Thank you for not giving up, even when we couldn’t talk for days or get to see each other.”
He shakes his head. “I told you, I’ll wait for you as long as you want me to.”
I stare at him, amazed. “Why?”
His lips coil into a heart-melting grin. “You know why.”
Bobbing my head slowly, I let go of his hand and watch him step back with Emma, Aunt Leah, and Luke. Excitement covers their faces as they look at me.
Aunt Leah gives me the “go for it” nod. I take a deep breath before making my way onto the stage to meet the eagerly waiting crowd.
Seeing me at last, they burst out into loud roars. I take a minute to wave at the different faces and really let the moment sink in. I glance behind at the guys. They ready their instruments and give me the go ahead.
Turning back to the crowd, I lock my hands around the microphone, having the need to say something before I sing. “I just want to tell you guys that you should never be afraid of going after your dreams, no matter what. And when it comes to love, at least from my experience, it’s never who you think you want, but who wants you…”
As the electrifying guitar riffs sails off, accompanied by the evocative melodies of the keyboard, I part my lips and the words of ‘Break Free’ immediately seep out.
You have a shadow of doubt
that is covering your heart
It’s not the world that you fear
But the ‘you’ afraid to start
Oh beli
eve it, you can do it…
Honestly, please tell me,
Why do you put on a show, when you’re no longer on stage?
Honestly, oh tell me
Is this the life that you want, living inside of a cage?
It’s suffocating…it’s time to break free
Tears and laughter masks the faces in the crowd. It uplifts me. I’ve only ever dreamed of touching hearts and I’ve achieved that and so much more.
Music stirs something indescribable within me. I feel eternally blessed that I’ve been gifted with it and I can’t believe I almost denied my passion. I know now more than ever that by rooting myself in loss and choosing to restrict my talent is not something my parents would want.
By the way, I can think about them now and smile freely without feeling sad. I can celebrate my birthday and not feel guilty, and walk into their bedroom when I go home to Seville and not struggle to control my emotions.
I’m stronger than I’ve ever felt. Brand new. I have music to thank for that because truthfully, even when I considered letting it go, music never let go of me.
Acknowledgement
I finished my sixth book. That might not seem like a lot, but to me, that’s major, because I’ve worked hard to reach this point.
Thank you as always to my very first readers: my family. Your support inspires me to keep writing. I not only do it for myself, but I write while holding my parents and siblings in my heart. It doesn’t matter how far I go from here on, because I know that I’m already a success in your eyes.
Tim, there are no words to describe how grateful and appreciative I am of you. You are such a wonderful man, and I’m thankful for every day that I get to share with you.
Ms. Laurie Treacy. Thank you for sticking with me on this journey, and as always, for your insightful critique. I don’t know what I’ll do without you. Thank you.
Taylor K. You are awesome! Thank you for the comments and your help in improving the story. I’m glad this is the start of a long editor/author relationship and I look forward to working with you again.
To Jennifer Byrd at She Reads New Adult blog, thank you for your to-the-core criticism. You touched on something that almost slipped me. Angie, Stephanee, and Stormy, thank you for beta reading another novel and for always being willing to read anything I write. To anyone else who reads my stories, I’m forever thankful that you take the time, and yes, as usual, I truly hope someone enjoys it.