Destructive

by Jessica Prince

  At that, her bored expression morphs into something else, something almost territorial just before she wipes it away and smiles. There is nothing genuine about her smile at all. Instinct tells me that this woman is not someone I’ll ever become friends with.

  “Oh, how lovely,” she replies enthusiastically, skipping toward me to wrap me in a disingenuous hug. I don’t even have time to return it before she releases me and steps back.

  “Marley, this is Kiersten Van Beck. Her family and ours have been friends for many years. She and Gabriel basically grew up together.”

  Sitting on one of the barstools, Kiersten throws her head back and places a hand on her chest in an overdramatic laugh. “We used to get into so much trouble didn’t we, Annabel?”

  “That you did, darling,” Annabel replies as she goes back to cooking. Taking my queue from her, I return to cutting biscuits out.

  “Do you remember that time the cops busted us making out in the back of his car? I was certain Roberto was going to have a coronary when we showed up that night with a police escort.”

  Pausing from cutting the dough, I look up and ask, “You and Gabriel dated?” I’m not sure why exactly, but something about this woman just doesn’t sit well with me, and to know that she and Gabriel have been together twists my stomach into knots. I’ve barely spoken three words to her and I already know for certain that I do not like her.”

  I’m surprised that Annabel seems oblivious to the fact that Kiersten is a wolf disguised as a lamb.

  “Yes, Gabriel and I were each other’s first loves.” At her words, bile rises up in my throat. “We were together for four amazing years. Our families were so sure we were going to get married. Things just didn’t work out back then. I think we were too young at the time, but we’ve always remained very close.”

  What she’s insinuating isn’t lost on me. I know she’s trying to imply that she and Gabriel might get back together eventually, and the sickness I’m feeling changes into a dull ache in my chest. This is the type of woman I picture with a man as attractive and well-rounded as Gabriel. Not some bartender who’s working her way through college.

  “So what is it you do, Marley?” Kiersten asks with feigned interest.

  I dread having to answer, but I refuse to lie. “I’m a bartender at Fletchers.”

  “A bartender?” There’s no missing the slight crinkle in her nose at my response, as though she’s just smelled something unsavory.

  “Yes.”

  “Well that’s nice. Where did you attend college?”

  My tone remains dull as I speak. “I didn’t…I mean, I’m going now. I attend night school at the community college.”

  “Oh, that’s wonderful, dear,” Annabel tells me.

  Kiersten studies me like I’m something that needs to be scraped off the bottom of her shoe. “Did you not want to attend a university when you graduated high school?”

  My eyes are on the dough in my hands. “I didn’t graduate. I got my GED a while back and am working my way through. I’d have liked to be able to go to a university, but it’s just not something I can really afford.

  “Oh, that’s terrible,” Kiersten says, and I can’t help but picture her face as I knead the dough a little too aggressively. “Were you’re parents not able to help?”

  “My parents are dead,” I deadpan, officially over this conversation.

  I turn to see Annabel smiling at my sympathetically, clueless to the fact that the sole purpose of Kiersten’s interrogation was to make me feel beneath her.

  Needing an escape from the tension that’s rolling over me like a thick fog, I politely ask where the restroom is. I keep my steps light as I walk from the room even though everything in me wants to run. I close myself in the small bathroom just off of the kitchen, breathing deep calming breaths as I try to get my emotions under control. Just that small exchange with Kiersten has me questioning what I’m doing. I don’t belong here. I’m not rich or educated. I don’t have any family left—and what little family I did have wasn’t fit to raise a plant, let alone a child.

  Splashing my face with cool water, I attempt a mental pep talk before leaving the restroom. Instead of heading back into the kitchen, I make my way through the house in search of Gabriel. I just need to be close to him right now. I need him to let me know that he wants me here.

  As I turn the corner leading to the living room something in my peripheral vision causes me to stop. Gabriel is standing in what appears to be a study with Kiersten wrapped around him like a second skin. He’s holding on to her waist, and I watch as she pulls back and places her hands on his cheeks, staring up at him lovingly. I can’t hear what’s being said, but I don’t need to. They look perfect together, their beauty complimenting the others. Gabriel reaches up and wraps his hands around her wrists and opens his mouth to speak, but I’ve seen enough. I don’t want to stand here and witness anymore adoring looks pass between them. Turning in the direction I came from, I head back into the kitchen and go about helping with lunch, feeling like a knife has just pierced me heart. I pray that the rest of the afternoon moves quickly so I can get the hell out of here.

  ***

  Every time I come to my parents’ house I make a trip to my father’s study. I feel comfort standing in the room where he spent so many hours. It’s like I can feel his presence around me. I look at the framed family photos sitting on the shelves and remember a time when things were easier, when I was naïve to all the ugly in the world. A time before life jaded me and turned me into the man I am today.

  “Hello, Gabe.”

  The voice behind me sends a chill down my spine. “What are you doing here, Kiersten?” I ask as I turn around.

  “I was invited, of course. Our families are close after all.” She moves faster than I could have imagined considering the height of her ridiculous heels. Before I can even react, her arms are around my neck in an unwelcomed hug. “You look great,” she murmurs in my ear.

  My hands land on her waist and I push her back, trying to untangle myself.

  Unrelenting, she grabs my face in her hands and looks up at me like I’m her long lost love or something. This bitch is certifiable. “I’ve missed you, baby. Have you missed me?” Her voice is raspy, a pathetic attempt at seduction.

  I grab hold of her wrists and try to pry my face from her clutches. “Kiersten, I’m only going to say this once, don’t make me have to repeat myself. For the remainder of this afternoon, do not fucking touch me. Understand? Act as though you don’t know who the hell I am.”

  She releases a huff and drops her hands to the side. “What? Don’t want your little girlfriend to know you used to fuck me like your life depended on it?” At the mention of Marley, my back goes straight. “I might have let that slip already. Sorry” she says with a little smirk.

  “Stay the fuck away from Marley, Kiersten. I’m not playing.”

  “You can’t be serious right now,” she tells me, planting her hands on her hips. “What the hell do you see in her anyway? Jesus, Gabriel. She’s a fucking bartender. She’s gutter trash.”

  Before she can say another word, I’m in her face. If my parents hadn’t taught me to never raise my hand to a woman, I’d have gotten off on slapping that smug look right off of her face. “Never speak that way about her again. Do you hear me?” I hiss between clenched teeth. It’s taking every ounce of will power I have not to lose my shit.

  “Afraid I’ll spill all your dirty little secrets?”

  “If I so much as see you look in her direction, I’ll make your life a living hell.”

  “You wouldn’t do that, Gabe,” she says, running her manicured nail down my chest. I grab her hand roughly, her eyes jerk back to mine and I see the instant she realizes just how serious I am. She tugs on her wrist, but I squeeze tighter, refusing to let go until I’m certain she’s gotten my point.

  “Don’t test me. You won’t like the results.”

  With that, I let her go and storm out of my father’s study
in search of the one woman who can calm the chaos that’s brewing inside of me.

  I spent the rest of the afternoon relatively silent. I would smile or nod when someone addressed me, but inside, I was a mess. As we all sat to eat, my eyes kept making their way over to where Kiersten sat, right across from Gabriel. I lost count of the number of times I caught her staring at him. He never looked at her, but I could see the strain on his face. Palpable stress rolled off of him.

  I kept my mouth shut and forced small bites of food—seeing as my appetite disappeared the instant I saw them together in the study—and tried to remain civil throughout the meal. Gabriel must have sensed something was wrong because he kept reaching under the table and squeezing my leg, when I’d make eye contact with him, his expression asked if everything was all right. I’d simply smile and nod.

  Now, sitting in his car as we leave his mother’s house, all I want to do is crawl into bed and sleep the rest of the day away.

  “Did something happen?” Gabriel asks, glancing over at me apprehensively before turning his gaze back to the road.

  “No, nothing happened,” I lie, unsure how to even begin to broach the subject of what I witnessed. Confrontation is not something I’m comfortable with so I’ll avoid it at all costs. My chest may hurt at the thought of what I saw between him and Kiersten, but I just can’t make myself bring it up. I’m too scared of what he might say. I fought so hard to keep my walls up, to protect myself against Gabriel’s hold over me, but now that he’s in, the thought of losing him is ripping me apart.

  “What did she say to you?” he demands.

  “Who?” I ask lamely, knowing too well exactly who he’s referring to.

  Jerking the wheel, Gabriel speeds across three lanes of traffic. “What the hell?” I yelp as the car skids on the gravel along the side of the road before finally jerking to a stop. “You could have gotten us killed!”

  “What did she say to you, Marley?” His eyes like lasers drilling into me, just daring me to lie again.

  And I do. “Nothing, Gabriel. It was nothing. Can you just take me home please? I’m tired.”

  “No. We aren’t moving until you tell me what the fuck happened back there. And like hell I’m taking you home. You’re coming back to my place, end of story.”

  I jerk back, the fury practically vibrating off of him. “You can’t force me to go home with you. I said I want to go home, if you won’t take me I’ll call someone to come get me.”

  “The hell you will.”

  “I’m not doing this with you. You’re trying to control me!”

  “And you’re being difficult!”

  “Excuse me?” Despite the fact that I probably should be, I’m not scared of Gabriel in this moment. I’ve already moved passed that, knowing he’d never do anything to physically hurt me. Right now I’m just pissed, and getting more heated by the minute.

  “You heard me. Something’s bothering you and instead of talking to me about it, you’re trying to run again. I’m not going to allow it this time. You’re mine, Marley. You’ve said so yourself. Now tell me what the fuck happened at my mother’s house to make you go all cold and distant again.”

  Red coats my vision, threatening to take over. How dare he throw his weight around to try and manipulate me? Especially after having his hands on another woman just hours ago.

  So much for no confrontation.

  “First of all, I said nothing happened, so drop it. Second, I don’t give a shit what I’ve said. I want to go home, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”

  Gabriel leans into my space, menacingly. “Watch me.”

  That’s it. I’ve officially had enough. Jerking my seatbelt off, I throw the door open and get out of the car. Gravel crunches under my heavy footsteps as I all but run away from Gabriel. I can barely make out him yelling my name over the blood rushing through my ears. I’m angry and confused. My heart hurts every time I think about what I saw in that study. My emotions are a jumbled mess and I don’t know how to handle everything being thrown at me. I keep walking as Gabriel yells my name, picking up my pace as I hear him get closer and closer.

  One second I’m staring at the ground in front of me, trying not to trip as I walk, the next I’m being lifted into the air, a startled shriek escaping me as Gabriel hefts me over his broad shoulder and storms back in the direction of his car.

  “Put me down!” I kick my legs and pound his back with my fists, but my struggles are useless. He’s too big—too strong.

  Lifting my head, I watch as cars drive by, not one of them stopping to help. What if I was being abducted by a murdered? What if it wasn’t Gabriel, but some stranger set on torturing and killing me? Good to know I can count on the citizens of this fine city to help a woman in trouble.

  “I said Put. Me. Down!” I punctuate each word with a fist to his back.

  Dropping me like a sack of potatoes, my ass hits the warm metal of the car’s hood. With narrowed eyes, I look up at Gabriel as he towers over me, the anger in his expression mirroring my own.

  “What the fuck’s gotten in to you?” he bellows at me.

  And that’s all it takes. Right then, I snap. “I saw you with her!” I yell back.

  “Saw me with who?” His voice is still raised, but some of the anger is replaced with confusion.

  “Kiersten,” I snap at him. “In the study.”

  Gabriel takes a step back and looks at me with a strange expression. “What do you think you saw in there, Marley?”

  “I don’t think, Gabriel. I know. I saw the two of you holding each other. Her arms were wrapped around your neck and you were holding on to her waist.”

  Shaking his head, he comes closer, his arm stretching toward me, but I slide out of his reach. “It’s not what you thing, my bella—”

  “Bullshit! I know what I saw. I know all about your relationship. Four years, Gabriel? That’s a really long time. To hear her tell it, you were madly in love with each other. And she couldn’t wait filled me in on just how close the two of you still are. Judging by the scene I stumbled on at your mom’s house, she wasn’t kidding.”

  “No. It’s not like that.” He tries to touch me again, but I slap his hand away. “We aren’t close, baby. I can’t even fucking stand to look at her!”

  “You’re lying!”

  “I’m not!”

  Squeezing my eyes closed against the tears threatening to spill over, I whisper brokenly, “I want to go home, Gabriel. Please just take me home.” All of the fury I’ve been feeling quickly drains from me, leaving me exhausted and hurting. I don’t want to stand on the side of the road arguing with him anymore. I just want to run away.

  “You have to listen to me, my bella. I swear, it’s not what you think. I wasn’t holding her, I was pushing her away. That’s why my hands were on her waist. I was trying to push her off of me.”

  My traitorous heart jumps at that, desperate to believe him. But I’ll be damned if I allow myself to cave to him—to become yet another man’s doormat to do with as he pleases—even if I find myself falling for him. I’m not that terrified, shattered little girl anymore. I’m stronger than I used to be.

  “Please.” His voice is close, his minty breath fans across my cheeks causing my eyes to pop open. I hadn’t heard his approach. “Please just hear me out. If you still want to go home when I’m finished, I’ll take you, I promise. Just come home with me. Let me tell you what really happened.”

  He looks so troubled…pained really, and another piece of my wall cracks at the desperation in his voice. I tell myself that I’ll hear him out and then leave. But I don’t know how much I believe that.

  “Fine,” I say, climbing off the hood of his car and making my way to the passenger side. I slide in and buckle my seatbelt, refusing to watch his movements as he walks around and gets in next to me.

  The remainder of the drive to Gabriel’s penthouse is in complete silence. Unlike the other times, this silence is laced with discomfort. He pulls the car
into his designated spot in the parking garage and I climb out as soon as he has it in park. Standing at the elevator with my arms wrapped around myself, I wait for him to swipe his card. Nothing about my stance invites him to touch me in any way. I’m afraid if he touches me, I’ll break down.

  Tossing his keys on the small table by the door once we’ve entered, Gabriel heads straight for the kitchen, not saying a word. I follow behind at a distance, knowing that whatever he has to say will be said in there.

  Taking a seat on one of the barstools at the island, I watch as he gets a beer from the fridge, pops the cap off, and proceeds to down it in just a few short gulps before finally looking at me.

  “Yes, Kiersten and I dated for four years…” he starts. That dull ache in my chest becomes even stronger. “But that was a long time ago.”

  “Do you still have feelings for her?” I ask, staring down at my hands as I pick the skin at my cuticles. I’m too afraid to look at him—too afraid of what I’ll see in his eyes.

  “I feel nothing but disgust for that woman.” My head snaps up at his harsh tone. Nothing in his eyes contradicts what he’s just told me.

  “But she said—”

  “I know what she told you, and it’s all a lie, baby. We aren’t close. Haven’t been since before we even broke up. I tolerate her because our parents are good friends, that’s all.”

  “She told me you’re families expected you to get married.”

  “If they expected that, it was their own doing. Mine and Kiersten’s relationship was turbulent from day one. I never led anyone to believe there was a future with her.”

  I want to believe him, but I have so many questions. “If it’s as bad as you say, why did it last for so long? There has to be a reason, Gabriel.”

  Grabbing another beer from the fridge, he takes a healthy drink before responding. “We were seventeen, Marley. I was young and stupid and let my cock make all the decisions for me. If it wasn’t for the sex, we’d have had absolutely nothing keeping us together.”