Love You Now (Book Two: Love Hurts Duet)

by M. Robinson

The signal dingin’, gate movin’ down. Whistle blowin’ through the flurry as the train approached at a rapid pace.

  “HARLEY! NO!”

  I didn’t listen, I never do.

  Especially, to him.

  I darted in front of the massive machine with seconds to spare, leavin’ him behind the gate.

  “You fuckin’ brat! You could have just been killed!” I heard him roar over the noise blarin’ from the tracks, snarlin’ out of his truck.

  Not lookin’ back, I stuck my middle finger up in the air. Smilin’ from ear to ear that I was definitely able to lose him that time.

  Phew.

  I pedaled slower. Despite the rush of adrenaline coursin’ through every last inch of me, my legs were on fire. Burnin’ from the fight-or-flight mentality I just experienced.

  Once I made it inside my house, I exhaled another long, heavy sigh I hadn’t realized my lungs were holdin’. Ease suddenly washin’ the stress away for the first time that day.

  “You alright, baby girl?” Daddy questioned, walkin’ into the kitchen from the garage. Kissin’ the tip of my nose before grabbin’ a water from the fridge.

  I nodded, smilin’ at him. Tryin’ not to think about the horrible day I’d experienced at the hands of Jackson Pierce.

  Daddy took one look into my eyes and asked, “You wanna go for a ride later?”

  He always knew when I needed to feel the wind through my hair and let loose. I may have been almost sixteen-years-old, but in my father’s mind, I was still that baby girl relyin’ on him for everythin’. Includin’ my sanity.

  I nodded again. I wasn’t ready to talk about it, and if he heard the tone in my voice he’d know somethin’ was up. Right now, he assumed it was school and homework. Havin’ no idea it was my whole world crumblin’ down on me.

  Jackson and my best friends...

  Wait, when did Jackson become part of my whole world?

  “Is it that little shit, Harley?”

  I jerked back. “What?”

  “You heard me, baby. Is it Jackson? Is he pickin’ on you? Bullyin’ you? Say the word, sweetheart, and I’ll pay him a long-awaited visit.”

  “Daddy! What does that mean?”

  “Let’s just say that little shit would be grateful his old man is a doctor after I got through wit’ him.”

  My eyes widened. He’d never spoken about Jackson this way before.

  Was I becomin’ that transparent?

  “Oh, Daddy... Jackson’s harmless.” I chuckled, comin’ to his defense as if it were second nature. “I’ve handed that boy his ass more times than I can count.”

  “That’s ’cuz you’re a Jameson, baby girl.”

  “Yeah, and we’re badass motherfuckers,” Luke added, walkin’ into the kitchen while adjustin’ his nuts in his gym shorts.

  Brothers. Gross.

  “Don’t let your mother hear you say that, or it’ll be my ass she lays out.”

  “Then reel in your old lady, Pops.”

  “Luke...” Daddy warned in that tone he used on my brother often.

  Luke was always goin’ toe-to-toe with our father.

  The Prez.

  Ever since I could remember, he was constantly testin’ our dad’s authority. Plain and simple, Luke wasn’t scared of him, and our old man knew it.

  “What? I’m just sayin’.”

  “I know what you’re sayin’, and I ain’t the man you should be sayin’ it to. Ya feel me?”

  “Hey, Daddy,” I intervened like I did every time, protectin’ my brother’s ass. “How we gonna go for a ride later if your other woman needs an oil change?”

  “Headin’ out to the shed right now to take care of her, baby girl.” He nodded to Luke. “Make sure your brothers don’t kill each other over the PlayStation, yeah?”

  “Got it.”

  Daddy left, and I peered over at Luke.

  “One day I won’t be here playin’ mediator for you. Better watch yourself, baby brother. Daddy’s put men to ground for speakin’ to him with less disrespect than you do.”

  He shrugged. “I’m exactly like him. He should be proud.”

  “Luke—”

  “So, what’s this bullshit I hear ‘bout Jackson fuckin’ the babysitter and you catchin’ em?”

  “How do you know about that? We don’t even go to the same school.”

  “People ain’t got anythin’ better to do than talk. I hate that pussy. Want me to take care of him for you?”

  “Oh my God! Why do all the men in my life think violence is the answer?”

  “’Cuz it is. Quarterback my ass, he’s a bitch.”

  “Stay out of it, Luke.”

  “I will. For now. He hurts you again and I’ll teach him a lesson he won’t ever forget.”

  “He didn’t hurt me.”

  “Be careful, big sis. Your nose is growin’.”

  I didn’t know what to say, so I didn’t say anythin’ at all.

  With that, he turned and left. Walkin’ toward the game room, hollerin’, “Owen! Hand over that remote, or I’ll shove it up your ass!”

  “Eat shit! I was here first!”

  I rolled my eyes.

  Boys.

  I was over every last one of them, includin’ my best friend. Grabbin’ an apple from the fridge, I shut the door and made my way up to my room.

  Never, ever, expectin’ what happened next...

  <>Jackson<>

  Then: Sixteen years old

  The Gremlin could push my buttons like no one else in this world.

  I waited.

  Feeling as though I’d been waiting on daggers all fuckin’ day for her to say one damn word to me.

  I fucked up.

  I knew that.

  But Jesus ... it wasn’t like I gave a flying fuck about Willow.

  She had to know that simple fact, it was evident. I didn’t look at her, talk to her, treat her like anything other than what she was.

  A piece of ass.

  Harley knew that, right?

  I was pissed beyond belief by the reckless act she pulled. Pedalin’ away from me like I was going to physically hurt her, the beast destroyin’ the beauty wasn’t who I was. Infuriatin’ me that she almost got herself killed in the process. But that wasn’t the biggest problem I had with her.

  The little shit lied to me.

  Keeping a huge ass secret that not only messed with my mind, but with my entire life.

  I couldn’t believe she had been holding onto my DNA Dementia results for over five years, as if she didn’t hold my whole world in her hands.

  My future.

  Never once did she even spill a hint of having them. I was furious...

  With her.

  My mother.

  My life.

  The chaos I created by sleeping with a girl I didn’t even care about.

  Cash fuckin’ McGraw.

  I hated him more so now than ever before. He was the reason I was in this mess. It took everything inside me, every bit of restraint, not to knock him out today. Pussy boy was trying to act like he didn’t know Harley caught us. When he was the reason I fell balls deep into Willow’s pussy to begin with.

  I wouldn’t be surprised if he was the one who told her where I was. The more I thought about it, the more it made sense. How she found us so easily. How she was so hurt by my actions. How my impulsiveness was just the beginning of my destruction, stirring up a hurricane of emotions I couldn’t save us from.

  You reaped what you sow, and there I was with my dick tucked in between my legs...

  Waiting.

  For her.

  The second she opened the door to her bedroom, she jolted out of her skin. The same way my heart came to life at the sight of her finally standing in front of me.

  There’s nowhere to go, Harley.

  With her hand over her chest, she fumed, “You just scared the shit outta me!”

  I sat there on her bed for what felt like forever.

  An eternity of what-ifs
.

  Having a goddamn pity party for myself.

  “Good,” I snapped. “At least I got some fuckin’ reaction out of you today. What the fuck kind of stunt was that back there? You could have been killed! I could have watched you die a brutal death!”

  “Isn’t it obvious? I’d rather die than talk to you.”

  I winced, showing her clear as day how much that just hurt me.

  She didn’t back down, not that I expected her to.

  “How did you even get in here?”

  “Gremlin, I’ve been sneaking into your room since elementary school.”

  “No shit! How do you always get in here?”

  “Baby girl—”

  “Stop callin’ me that! You have no right to be in here! You need to leave! Now!”

  “Not gonna happen. I’m not leaving until you hear me out. I have a lot to say and you’re gonna listen whether you want to or not.”

  She cocked her head to the side, defiance written all over her pretty face.

  “You know what?” she uttered in one breath. “I’ve always wanted to know what would happen if my brothers or my daddy found you in my bed.”

  I grinned, looking her over with a predatory regard. “It’s nice to know you spend time fantasizing about having me in your bed. Tell me, am I on top or are you riding me?” I smiled, sucking in my bottom lip. “Given the chance, baby girl, I’d let you choose.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “You got ten seconds to get the hell out of my face, or I will scream bloody murder you’re in my room. Uninvited. My brothers are right downstairs, and my daddy is in his shed. Who do you think will make it up here first? My brothers or my father? ’Cuz I sure as shit would love to find out.”

  “Harley.” I sternly shook my head. “Don’t fuckin’ try me.”

  “Five seconds.”

  “Gremlin...”

  “Three and I’ll scream.”

  “So fuckin’ scream.”

  She didn’t hesitate. “J—”

  I jumped off the bed and was in her face. My hand cupping her mouth before she could get out the second letter of my name. Kicking the door shut with my foot, I backed her into the wall, muffling her scream.

  Snarling, “You fuckin’ brat.”

  I didn’t give her a chance to fight me off, gripping onto her wrists. I held them above her head and stepped in between her legs, so she couldn’t knee me in the balls.

  Her nostrils flared, and her chest heaved. Causing her tits to pop from the seam of her stupid sequins shirt, barely covering her in the first place.

  My dick twitched, and my heart sped up.

  She glared at me, and I held onto her tighter.

  My mouth getting nice and close to my hand over her lips, I spoke the truth I’d been dying to confess, “What you saw this weekend meant nothing to me. It was just a fuck. Do you understand me?”

  Her eyes widened.

  “Nod like a good little girl if you understand.”

  Goddamn it! The fuck?

  The little shit bit my hand.

  She went to scream again, but this time I stuffed the apple from her hand in her mouth instead.

  Blurting out with no indecision whatsoever, “I’m sorry.”

  Her eyes widened again, and I swear her heart stopped beating against my chest. Never expecting me to say those two words.

  Even her shocked response didn’t stop me from continuing on. “Baby girl, you may see me as a liar in your eyes, but you proved yourself to be untrustworthy as well. All this time, Gremlin ... all these fuckin’ years ... after all our talks, our letters, our fuckin’ hate. You knew what was constantly on my mind, in the forefront of my thoughts, in my dreams and nightmares. You’ve known ... you’ve always fuckin’ known without me having to say anything to you about it. And what? Constantly being a pain in my ass, a broken fuckin’ record when you’ve had my worst fear in the palm of your hands. So that, Harley Jameson, makes you a liar too.”

  Grabbing the apple out of her mouth, I took a bite and let her go. Stating, “Just like in the Garden of Eden, I fell into temptation. People have been making bad decisions since the beginning of time. I took a bite of the forbidden fruit under the pier this weekend, but trust me when I say ... it was you, I was swallowing, not her.”

  I’d be lying if I said I was expecting her to say anything besides, “I hope you choke on that apple.”

  “Wow,” I scoffed out. “After everything I just said to you, that’s all you have to reply?”

  “You should be grateful I’m not screamin’ your name.”

  “Oh, baby girl, don’t you get it? I’m counting down the days till I have you screaming my name.”

  “You’re unbelievable! What do you expect me to say?”

  “The truth. Starting with those fuckin’ papers. Do you know the results?”

  “What if I did? It wouldn’t matter anyway. You claim I’ve known your worst fears. You’re right, I have. But don’t try to pretend like I haven’t been pushin’ you to take the test for years.”

  “Why would you do that when you’ve had them in your possession all this time?”

  “’Cuz I wanted you to take that step forward on your own. I didn’t wanna force the results on you.”

  “Oh, you mean like you did two days ago?”

  “That ain’t fair.”

  “No, what’s not fair is the fact you’re trying to put yourself up on this pedestal. When you’re no better than me. You’re not my girlfriend, Harley. We aren’t in a relationship. We never have been. I didn’t cheat on you, so stop trying to crucify me like I did.”

  She noticeably grimaced.

  I regretted the words as soon as they left my mouth, however there was no taking them back. At the end of the day, it was our reality.

  “I. Hate. You. Get the fuck out of my room and my life.”

  “Easier said than done, Gremlin.”

  “Why don’t you go run to Willow, huh? I bet she’s just waitin’ for you to keep talkin’ shit about me.”

  I narrowed my eyes at her. “I don’t talk to Willow about you. Where would you get that from?”

  “I don’t believe you. You’re nothin’ but a liar.”

  “For fuck sake, Harley. I apologized, I meant it. Even though I shouldn’t have to. I did nothing wrong. I wasn’t lying to you when we were dancing. You took our conversation way out of context and put your own spin on it. Now, I’m getting your bullshit ’cuz you romanticized something I said and ran with it? What more do you want from me? You want me on my knees, begging for your forgiveness? Or on my knees with your pussy in my mouth, eating it out for you?”

  “Ugh! You’re disgustin’! I want nothin’ from you but to get out.” Her fists clenched at her sides. “Now!”

  I wasn’t going to get through to her. Not when she was like this. She was too riled up, too heated. Her thick Jameson skull was in full effect. Nothing I said would matter because in this moment...

  She did hate me.

  In spite of it being the last thing I wanted to do, I stepped back away from her.

  Speaking another truth, “This isn’t over.”

  All I could do, was give her what she wanted.

  I turned and left.

  Her room, not her life.

  In hopes, she would eventually forgive me.

  Chapter 7

  <>Harley<>

  Then: Sixteen-years-old

  “Harley, you can’t not do something for your birthday! That’s like against the law,” Shiloh exclaimed, standin’ in front of me with her hands on her hips.

  It was my birthday.

  My sixteenth birthday.

  Sweet sixteen only comes around once, and I was spendin’ it workin’ at the animal shelter. I went from a volunteer position to a part-time employee about a year ago. These flea bags were my happy place. Always had been. Always would be.

  To this day a Wheaten Terrier mix hadn’t walked through the doors, but I didn’t give up faith that eventually my
furry best friend would come into my life.

  When the time was right, it’d happen.

  It didn’t matter how many times these mutts bit me, their bark was always bigger.

  Exactly like a certain bully who wouldn’t stop by any means to get my attention.

  “Shiloh, I don’t mind. It’s just another birthday.”

  “It’s your sweet sixteen, and you already forbid your parents from throwing you a party. Come on, let’s go do something amazingly epic that will be monumental for this day!”

  “Like what?”

  “I have an idea, but you have to come with me.”

  I laughed, “I’m workin’.”

  “Puhlease ... you know Sharon would let you leave early. It’s your birthday after all.”

  “How many times are you going to remind me it’s my birthday?”

  “As many as it takes to get you to leave with me. It’s bad enough that Cash has a gig today, and he can’t spend your birthday with us. Now you’re telling me you’re out of commission too? I won’t stand for it. I’m putting my foot down, you’re coming with me. With or without your consent.”

  “You sound like Jackson.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Jackson’s an asshole.”

  I nodded. “Facts.”

  These last few months proved to be hectic to say the least. Jackson was ruthless in his pursuit to get back into my life. His antics knew no bounds, from the letters he left in my locker, to his text messages, to the sunflowers he’d leave on my bed every Sunday evenin’.

  Which always made me feel somethin’ I couldn’t put my finger on. A sensation that shook me to my core and made me feel weak, out of control. Not in sync with my mind ’cuz my heart fluttered every time I saw those freshly cut yellow flowers perfectly placed in the center of my bed. He was cuttin’ them from his mother’s garden that Camila was adamant they grow at their new home. Sayin’ she wanted Journey and the boys to know Bailey was still with them.

  No matter where they lived, she’d always be there.

  Just this mornin’, I woke up to sunflowers decked out all over my room. How he kept sneakin’ into my space without me noticin’ was beyond me.

  Except this time there was a note.

  When I lie awake at night, all I see is you.

  Happy sweet sixteen, Gremlin.

  I took a deep breath, once again readin’ over the note on my desk. I’d been lookin’ at it all damn day. I couldn’t stop myself from doin’ so. There was somethin’ so vulnerable about it, and Jackson was anythin’ but that.