Liam clapped a hand on his back. “You should have told her you loved her, man, way before you were pissed at her.”
That was his mistake, and he would correct it. He hoped it wasn’t too little too late, and he hoped against everything he had she would accept his apology. He didn’t want to go through life without her; he wanted her to be a part of his family. Their family unit was what he was used to. The warmth of her body in bed next to his at night, her girlie shit in the bathroom next to his. If he had to go through life living without that, he would never be the same.
Not to mention Remy. Remy loved her like he’d never seen Remy love before. When he realized Harper was gone, it would kill him.
‡
Chapter Twenty-Three
Harper juggled the gift bag in her hands as she made her way through the parking lot of the hospital. Going through Natalie, she’d verified with Cash that it would be okay for her to come and see him. She’d missed the kid, and she wanted to see with her own two eyes that he was okay. Second-hand reports weren’t cutting it.
As she got closer to the front doors of the hospital, she saw a security guard arguing with a couple. Her heart sank as she saw George and Janet. George was yelling, and Janet was screaming.
“My son is in there,” she screamed, spit flying from her mouth. “You can’t keep me from my son, I have a right to know he’s okay.”
From a distance, Harper was able to observe. The two of them were obviously high. Janet’s hair was greasy and tangled, George had what looked to be a two-week beard on him, and his belly hung out from the edge of his dirty shirt. Stains covered their clothes, and they both looked like they stank to high heaven. Pulling out her cell phone, she quietly recorded what was going on. Hopefully Cash would be able to use this in his case against them.
The scene went on for fifteen more minutes until the security guard threatened to call the police. Once he did that, they backed off and turned to face Harper. They advanced on her before she could figure out how to get away.
“Did you get a nice show, girl?” George asked as they boxed her in. He was in front of her, and Janet was behind her.
“I did.” Harper grinned, trying not to let her nervousness show. “I plan on giving it to our attorney. You know you aren’t supposed to be anywhere near him.”
George grinned right back at her. “You know, I may not get custody of my son, but at least I know I’ve fucked up Cash’s life. It was so easy to break the two of you apart. A few little doubts here, a few little doubts there.”
Her skin felt cold as he smiled. It didn’t reach his eyes, and it was purely sinister.
“Is that what you wanted? To make Cash’s life miserable?”
“He’s been a little shit to me, no matter how hard I’ve tried since I came into his life. He’s ruined a lot for me. He convinced Janet to get clean every once in a while, and then I’d have to come back and start all over again. She’s my woman; she’ll never be just his mother.” He spit to the side as he took a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it, blowing smoke in her face.
“What kind of a human being are you?”
“The kind that gets what I want, damn the consequences, honey. It’s time you learn that life isn’t all about doing what’s right. It’s about doing what feels good. And making Cash’s life a living hell…it feels damn good to me.”
“I know you don’t care about me, and you may not care about Cash, but don’t you care at all about Remy?” She folded her arms over her chest, trying to deflect the words he spewed at her.
“Collateral damage, just like Janet’s been collateral damage many times over the years.”
It suddenly clicked in Harper’s head. None of this was about George’s love for his woman or his son, this was about his hate for Cash. “What did Cash ever do to you?”
“That punk is a disobedient little prick who made me hit him more times than I can count and got me into trouble with CPS. If he’d just learned to shut his fucking mouth, I wouldn’t have had to show him the backside of my hand.”
“But that was your favorite thing to do, wasn’t it?”
None of them had heard or seen Cash approach.
“You were always looking for a reason to knock me down a peg or two. So this is your new way, huh? Ruin Remy’s life, ruin my life. Neither one of us matter to you. Nothing matters to you except yourself.”
“No.” George turned so they faced one another. “Fucking up your life means the most to me, and seeing how sad you are since your piece of ass left—that’s just icing on the cake.”
*
Cash had never felt rage quiet like he felt when he heard those words come out of George’s mouth. He had known for most of his life that the man hated him. What he hadn’t realized was the lengths that George would go to in order to make his life hell. And that’s what his life had been since Harper had left—hell. He’d questioned every decision he’d ever made, and he hadn’t slept worth a damn.
“You are a piece-of-shit human being. You know that, right?”
“At least some of us can admit when we’re defeated, Cash. Others, like you, they keep trying and trying, no matter how hard life knocks them down. They get stuck in this cycle where they believe there’s a better life out there, while the rest of us laugh at their attempts.”
“There is a better life out there,” Harper said from where she stood. “Cash, don’t believe him. We were living a better life.”
“Being broke?” George laughed. “You don’t think I know why you run the Trail? It’s not only because you love it, it’s because you need the money.”
“My financial situation is none of your fucking business.” Cash clenched his hands together. “Besides, I’ve spent most of my life taking care of your woman. How does that make you feel? Those drugs you did, I paid for. That house you slept in, I put the roof there. You owe me, not the other way around.”
George’s face got red in a way that suggested he was about to blow a gasket. He reached back with his fist and pushed forward to slam it into Cash’s jaw.
Cash, however, was older and wiser now. He planted his feet on the ground and sidestepped the blow. As he sidestepped, he brought his knee up, curled his hand around George’s neck, and popped him in the nose.
Blood gushed almost immediately as Cash let him fall to the ground. His worried eyes met Harper’s.
“Go upstairs and check on Remy while I handle this.”
She nodded and took off at a run, making sure she still had her gift bag. If she had anything to say about it, Remy wouldn’t know what had gone down in the parking lot.
‡
Chapter Twenty-Four
Harper entered Remy’s hospital room with a soft knock, smiling as she saw him sitting up tall in the bed. “Hey.” She walked over and gave him a huge hug. “When I heard you were in here, I had to see for myself that you were okay.”
He hugged her tightly, burying his face in her hair. “It was a bad one, Harper. I scared Cash.”
“I bet you did.” She ruffled his hair.
“I kind of scared myself too. I’ve never not been able to breathe like that before.”
She hated that she was the cause of that; the fact she and Cash couldn’t figure out ways to privately take care of their business had caused this little boy pain. He could have died. “I’m sorry, Rem.”
Wanting to take his mind off the afternoon in question, she reached over and grabbed the bag she’d brought with her. It contained small gifts from the dollar store, probably ten bucks total, but the smile on his face was enough to make her happy she’d done it.
He’d pulled out the coloring book she’d bought him along with the crayons she’d purchased and was enthusiastically coloring a page in the book as they talked quietly. “You’re coming back home, right?” he asked as he concentrated on his artwork, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth.
How did she explain this to a kid who’d not had any stability in his life? “I hope to, soon.�
�
Remy stopped coloring and looked at her. “You and Cash can’t stay mad at each other for long. You’re my family,” he explained, like it was the simplest thing in the world.
“It’s complicated.” She wondered how much she should tell him, if he would even understand it. This is where she ran into problems with what was appropriate to tell him.
“I love both of you, and I want you to be my family.” He shrugged, as if that should fix everything.
“Oh, Remy.” She ran her hand through his hair. “I love you too, but sometimes it takes more than that. Sometimes adults have to figure out a way to get along after they’ve hurt each other.”
“Cash made you cry.”
He had, but she’d also made him very angry. “He did, but please don’t think badly of your brother. I did some things that weren’t very nice, and I kept secrets. He was reacting to what I had done to him.”
*
Cash stopped himself from going into the room as he stood at the door, watching the two of them interact. It tore at his heart, because what he saw was exactly how he’d envisioned the three of them being a family. Putting a hand on the door jamb to steady himself, he continued to listen.
“But doesn’t Cash tell me that it’s important to forgive?” Remy asked Harper.
“It is important to forgive.” She nodded. “That takes time in some situations though. What I did to your brother is my fault, and I don’t blame him one bit for the way he treated me.”
Remy was silent for a few minutes as he mulled that around in his head before he spoke again. “But he loves you, Harper, just like I do.”
Cash could hear Harper sniff, and he had to grip the edges of the door so that he didn’t rush in there and offer to fix everything. In his mind, this wasn’t only his situation to fix, it was theirs, and until she could be honest, they couldn’t work on it.
“Please know that I love you and Cash both, a lot. More than the moon and the stars, and I hope one day to be able to come back home, but it’s going to take some work, Rem. It won’t happen overnight.”
He huffed, folding his arms over his chest. “I refuse to eat anyone else’s pancakes but yours.”
Harper laughed loudly, leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. “You make sure not to.”
“I promise.” Remy stuck out his pinky and they hooked them together. “I’ll wait for you to come back.”
Cash hoped none of them would be waiting too long.
‡
Chapter Twenty-Five
“Are you sure you’re comfortable?” Cash asked Remy as he got him situated in his bed at home. Leaving the hospital earlier in the day had been the highlight of their week. Cash had never been so relieved when the doctor had determined it was safe for Remy to be released.
“I promise,” Remy said as he leaned back against his pillows. “When does Harper get off work?”
He’d been asking one form of that question or another since they had left the hospital, and Cash knew that now he had to be honest.
“Harper doesn’t live here for the time being. Don’t you remember how she and I got in that argument? We both decided it would be best if she left for a little while.”
It hurt to tell Remy that, to put those words out there in the open gave them power, and damn, he missed Harper in a bad way.
“It’s because of me, isn’t it?” Remy asked, his bottom lip sticking out in a sad motion.
“Not at all! This is between Harper and me. Some things happened that I overreacted to and then she over-reacted to, and we both said things we shouldn’t have. This is an adult matter that you’re not a part of. I promise. This isn’t your fault, Remy.”
From experience, Cash knew that Remy would probably carry around some guilt, no matter what he told him, but he wanted to make sure Remy knew he wasn’t to blame. “Harper and I have things to work out, but we both love you, and I promise you I will do everything in my power to make sure she comes home to us.”
He had to, because he ached, literally ached, with the feelings of wanting her with him. He couldn’t get through any of this without her. She had quickly made herself into someone he couldn’t live without.
“I want her here,” Remy admitted. “She makes good pancakes, she cares about my feelings, even when I’m mean—she tells me she loves me, and she cuts the crust off the sandwiches.”
Cash knew that no one besides him had ever cared to do that for Remy before. It meant the world to both of them, and he knew he had to find a way to get Harper back to them. If he couldn’t, he’d hate to see the shape the two of them would be in.
“I know, man.” Cash lay down on the bed and cuddled his little brother, kissing him on the forehead as he moved his hair back. “I miss her too. Things are going to work out; they have to, because we need her here.”
The two of them lay together in silence, much the way they had when they were younger, trying to stay out of their mother’s path.
“I want my sister back,” Remy told him, before he drifted off to sleep.
Those words struck a chord with Cash, and he knew in that moment that he would do anything he had to do to make sure Harper came back and never left again.
*
“We need to get you out of this house,” Natalie said as she plopped down on her bed beside where Harper lay.
“I don’t feel like it.” Harper sighed. She didn’t feel like doing much of anything. As far as she was concerned, life as she knew it was over. There was a tiny part of her that held hope she would be able to be with Cash again, but it wasn’t a large part, and she was scared to get her hopes up too high.
“Girl, it’s a first love kind of situation. We both know those never work out.”
How did she explain to Natalie that it hadn’t been first love? It had been so much more than that. Shoved into a situation neither one of them had been prepared for, it had been intense, it had been true, it had been everything she’d always wanted but never knew she did. She was ruined now for other men. All because a cocky-as-hell twenty-one-year-old had dared to show her what living life truly meant.
“I don’t expect you to understand, but those two are my family, and it’s going to take a lot more than distance and time to make my heart forget that.”
In this moment, she knew it was possible to die of a broken heart. She was pretty sure she was on her way.
Natalie sighed. “I hate to see you like this.”
It wasn’t like she enjoyed it, but there was no other way to explain it. “I’ll get over it at some point, but you’re going to have to realize that the life I’ve been living for the past few months is over, and it’s going to take me a while to get used to that.”
“Do you want to give him another chance?” Natalie asked quietly.
That was the question of the hour. Did she? In a way she did. She wanted to know where they could take their relationship, she wanted to know what was in store for them, but there was another part of her that was scared. Would he push her away when the going got tough again? What if she did something stupid again and he decided she wasn’t worth hanging onto?
So many scenarios played themselves out in her head, but there was one that kept playing over and over again. If Cash asked, she was more than positive she would give it another chance. No matter how bad they had hurt each other, she knew this relationship was worth saving.
“I would. I might hate myself in the beginning, but I would. There’s something about the two of them that you can’t shake. They get in your blood and in your bones, and you can’t imagine your life without them.” She tucked her hair under her cheek as she closed her eyes, hoping to forget the look Cash had given her before she’d walked out of the apartment.
“Then I hope for your sake the two of you can find your way back to one another, because I’m not sure you’re ever going to be able to move on if you feel that strongly.”
Harper had never agreed with a statement so much in her life.
‡
> Chapter Twenty-Six
Cash adjusted his tie as he watched Harper move from the audience section of the courtroom into the witness box. He had been surprised when he’d showed up at the courthouse and she had been there waiting. She looked more put together and more sure of herself than he did. He had struggled in the aftermath of her leaving. Nothing was as easy as it had been when they’d done it as a team.
“Please state your name.”
“Harper Stillwell,” she answered, licking her lips nervously as she glanced over at Cash.
He gave her a small smile, one of encouragement, that told her she would be fine. She wasn’t sure if he truly meant it; they hadn’t left each other on good terms, but taking what she could get was the name of the game today.
“How do you know Cash and Remy?” Damon asked her as he walked towards the witness box, speaking in clear tones.
“I lived with them for a couple of months, and I dated Cash.”
It wouldn’t do any of them any good to lie; they had to be truthful, they had to be upfront, and they had to be willing to lay it all out on the line.
“How did Cash treat Remy? Was he a responsible guardian?”
The attorney for Janet and George stood up. “Objection, he’s leading her.”
She glanced up at the judge, who nodded. “Agreed. Ms. Stillwell, in your own words, tell us what you saw in the home with the two boys.”
“The love of two brothers. Are things perfect all the time? No, but Cash does a very good job of showing Remy that even when things don’t go your way, you can rise above it and still be a good person. He is a wonderful adult figure for Remy, and even if people don’t understand it, he shows Remy in many ways that he loves him.” She teared up as she thought about it.
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