Paravoid (Rust Bucket Universe)

by Atk. Butterfly

  "Communications, notify squadron that we discovered a moon suitable for limited habitation. I propose to name it as Oden," said Captain Vincent.

  "Sir, I don't think he'll like that. I seem to recall something he said once to me in a casual conversation about how people named too many things after living people only to discover later that they weren't great or honorable. Not that I'm implying that Admiral Oden isn't either of those, but I'm certain that he won't appreciate it being named for him," she said.

  "You're sure of that?" Brut asked.

  She replied, "Yes sir. I really think that you should name it something else."

  "Very well. Give me a moment and I'll come up with a name, I hope," Brut said.

  "Why not wait awhile on giving it a name. Perhaps there's some feature about the moon that will inspire you later. I can report it now and you'll still have the right to name it," she said.

  "I think you're right. Report discovery of moon to squadron then," he said.

  ***

  "What'd I tell you, Boss? It's just a standard air and water probe being launched. We're safe here for the time being, but the Navy knows of it now. We'll have to move before settlers show up."

  "Yeah, damn settlers keep pushing us out farther and farther. Of course, that stretches the Navy a bit more. That I don't mind at all. Kind of makes it harder for them to be everywhere at once," the boss said.

  ***

  "It's got water and oxygen!" the First Officer exclaimed. "It can be settled! Captain Vincent, congratulations on your discovery!"

  "Thank you, First Officer Andrews. Would you like a moon named for you?" Brut asked.

  "Saddle that moon with Archibald? No sir. Give it some other name, please," Andrews replied.

  Suddenly, Brut smiled. "I know perfect name and no one can be upset. I dub moon as Maria. There aren't any named Maria already, are there?"

  Andrews smiled, "No sir. No planetary bodies named Maria yet."

  "Good. I was once inspired by a Maria, so Maria it is," Brut said proudly. "Communications, announce our discovery as Maria, please."

  "Yes sir, right away!"

  ***

  "Damn, they've named this place already," the communications pirate said.

  "What? What did they name this place?" asked the boss.

  "Maria, Boss."

  "Nice name. I'm going to miss Maria," he said.

  ***

  "Captain, we've got a surface metal deposit on Maria. From the readings, there's quite a few tons of metal there. Maria seems to have an identity all her own. Not many moons have a surface deposit of metals without active volcanic activity," Archy stated.

  "Well, she is just wearing her jewelry for us," Brut said romantically.

  Archy laughed and said, "Well, any settlers on her won't have to dig for metals for a little while, it appears. But they're going to have to go deep after they exhaust that. The rest are fairly deep according to the probe."

  "That is strange," Brut said. "Get an image of deposits and magnify it. See if you can determine what metals are present with spectro-analysis."

  ***

  Captain Vincent and First Officer Andrews gawked at the image of two space ships on the surface of Maria. Those were the surface deposits of metal.

  A moment later, Captain Vincent ordered, "Man your battle stations. Pirates on Maria with kidnapped space liner. Launch fighters when ready."

  The ship's lighting changed over to red lights and back several times. Alarms sounded for a few moments as Brut's voice carried through the ship over the intercom.

  "Communications, notify squadron of situation once fighters are in position," he ordered. "Then contact pirates and give me a headset."

  A minute later, three fighters left the cruiser and moved out quickly into position.

  First Officer Andrews reported, "Fighters in position. All weapon systems manned and ready."

  The communications officer informed the squadron about the pirate presence on Maria. Then she searched for a channel to communicate with the pirates.

  ***

  Admiral Oden was stunned to learn that the Dust Bunny had stumbled onto a pirate lair complete with a kidnapped space liner. The earlier news of the moon's discovery was another of those unexpected incidents that made the current training voyage just that much more memorable. Now they were facing their second set of pirates and their third incident of combat in all likelihood. He mused to himself that if the cadets continued to rack up events the way they were going, the Navy might be replaced by the Academy and its seven ships.

  Still, in accordance with his own directives, the cadets were on their own to solve whatever they encountered. He listened to Captain Cale discussing her options with her First Officer and then begin issuing commands to the squadron. Her ship was the one with cadets acting as Space Marines, complete with fully functional hover artytanks. If anyone was equipped to assault Maria and rescue the hostages, she was. Now it was even more important that the Majel Remm reach Maria as quickly as possible.

  ***

  "Boss, they've spotted us! They're trying to contact us now."

  "Blast it! Okay, make contact and find out what they have to say, though I'm pretty sure they want us to surrender," he replied.

  "Dust Bunny to pirates on surface of moon now known as Maria. Please respond."

  "Christ, Boss! It's the same ship that got those other pirates! They went in shooting on that bunch even though there were hostages present!"

  "Okay, give me the headset," the boss said.

  "Okay Dust Bunny, you're speaking to the boss. What do you want?"

  Captain Vincent began speaking, "Surrender or we will attack."

  "Listen Dust Bunny, we've got hostages. My men are inside the liner with them now. You come in shooting, I guarantee you that you'll be carrying back lots of dead hostages. On the other hand, we could negotiate something. Then we'll both come out of this real fine."

  "This is Captain Vincent of the Dust Bunny. I'll listen to your proposal, but be quick. Otherwise, either surrender or I'll order attack."

  The boss replied, "Fine, Captain Vincent. I'm glad to see that you're willing to talk. . ."

  "Boss, Boss!"

  The boss released the transmit switch and looked at the pirate trying to get his attention.

  "The Navy ship is still orbiting the other planet and they're moving away from us. They're not in position to attack."

  "They're not?" the boss asked.

  "No. They haven't changed that orbit since I spotted them. There's something wrong with them, I think."

  "Okay, thanks. Any other ships out there?" the pirate boss asked.

  "Maybe, but if they are they're small because nothing's registering right now."

  The pirate boss resumed transmitting, "Captain Vincent, you seem to be moving away from us. I think you're bluffing about being able to attack."

  Brut replied, "I make no bluffs. My ships stand ready to attack you right now. We also carry Paravoid missile warhead on board. My ship doesn't have to see you directly in order to attack. In fact, I would prefer that my ships be on the other side of this planet where they'll be protected if I'm forced to use that weapon."

  In the background of the cruiser's bridge, several cadets turned to stare at Captain Vincent, unsure of what he was talking about. Several of the cadets looked at each other to see if anyone knew, but they only saw each other shrugging their shoulders in puzzlement.

  "What's a Paravoid warhead? I haven't heard of that one before," the pirate boss replied.

  "You've probably heard of Thunderhead warhead that was used on Serapha. Thunderhead warhead shatters planets. Paravoid warhead only shatters atmosphere, leaving planet intact for terraforming. We were planning on practicing with it on this other planet which is why we're in such a high orbit around it. However, I will not hesitate to use it on Maria instead. Either of these planetary bodies is acceptable for test purposes."

  "You don't have any such weapon. Besides, yo
u'd kill the hostages," the pirate boss responded.

  "You know Navy doesn't negotiate for hostages. I've heard no proposal from you. Your time is up. I'm ordering attack."

  "Wait! Wait! If you'll let us leave, we'll leave the hostages alive on the surface of the moon. Think about it."

  Brut replied, "No deal. Enjoy Paravoid when it arrives."

  "What's a Paravoid warhead?" Andrews asked as soon as the transmission channel was closed.

  "It means same thing as almost nothing. It's a dummy warhead, next thing to having nothing on top of missile. I tried a bluff," Brut explained.

  "Captain Vincent, what's your plan?" Andrews asked.

  "We attack anyway using fighters. Communications, notify fighters to attack," Brut said.

  "Captain, why not use the missile anyway? So, it's a dummy. The pirates still don't know that and we might force them to surrender."

  ***

  The three fighters kicked their engines on as soon as they got the word to attack. They began to make their descent.

  "Dust Bunny to fighters. Hold your positions."

  ***

  "Boss, they've got three other ships with them and they are in position to attack. We can't fight off all four of them."

  "I'll try to bluff our way out. Maybe they'll believe that we really will harm the hostages."

  "Attention Dust Bunny. I'd like to try to negotiate again."

  Captain Vincent said, "Launch Paravoid missile. Attention pirates. You have one hour after Paravoid warhead lands on surface to make peace with your maker."

  ***

  "Boss! They launched a missile! They launched the goddamn Paravoid missile! They meant it!"

  "Shit! We did have to run up against a damn hard-ass Navy captain. I guess we better surrender, men. If we stay here, we're cooked. We sure can't go up there against the four of them," the pirate boss said. "At least, if we give up now, we can get off this rock and we'll only have to pull a few years in prison. Anyone disagree?"

  The pirate boss looked around. Everyone was nodding his head in agreement. He pressed the transmit switch and said, "Dust Bunny, you win. We surrender. Now please get us all off this rock before the atmosphere explodes. We'd rather spend a few years in jail."

  Captain Vincent replied calmly, "A wise decision. Stand by to be taken into custody. A fighter will land shortly. You will follow the instructions of its crew. You will be removed to safety in our custody very soon."

  Brut nervously handed the microphone back to the communications officer and then went to his seat and sat down, almost collapsing into it. All the while there was quiet applause from the other cadets on the bridge for his handling of the incident and successful capture of the pirates.

  First Officer Andrews said, "We better send down a few personnel to recover the missile after the pirates are in custody. I guess they can pretend to be disarming it."

  Captain Vincent looked at him and asked, "Why?"

  Andrews said, "Who knows? We might need to reuse the Paravoid warhead against some other pirates. We seem to be finding them wherever we go."

  "I hope not to find anymore of them on my tour as captain," Brut stated. "This bunch is enough for me."

  ***

  Admiral Oden listened intently to the explanation of how the pirates were taken. He actually laughed when he heard the cadets used almost nothing to force the pirates to surrender. Dave communicated his congratulations to Captain Vincent on the capture, indicating that he approved very heartily with the cadet's decision to run a bluff and was glad that it turned out so well.

  ***

  When the squadron caught up with the Dust Bunny, the pirates were already in custody aboard the space liner. The liner's crew was back in charge of their own ship and ready to leave. The passengers were also glad to be leaving and grateful that their families would be spared further anxiety over their individual fates. The liner left to return home, her crew aware now where they were located.

  Admiral Oden transferred back aboard the Dust Bunny, not because his supervision was required, but to personally chat with most of the individuals responsible for the successful handling of various endeavors over the past two days. While he moved about the ship, speaking with gunners and others, repairs were made on the engine damaged in the asteroid field.

  ***

  "Captain Vincent, aren't you going to organize an exploration party of your satellite?" one cadet asked.

  "Um, I wasn't thinking of that. We are going to be here for another day, possibly two. Yes, you are right. An exploration is in order to find out about indigenous wildlife. First Officer, please assemble an exploration team," Captain Vincent said.

  "Right away, sir," Andrews replied.

  ***

  With all five fighters back again with the cruiser, Cadet Ensign Andrews selected a large team consisting of three individuals to go in each of four areas and a fighter to give them overhead cover, should they run into anything large and dangerous. There would be a fifth fighter to back them all up in case of trouble.

  Quite to Andrews' surprise, Admiral Oden moved near him and watched carefully as he made his selections for the exploratory team.

  Andrews asked, "Sir, am I doing something wrong?"

  "Not at all, First Officer. Just curious to observe your choices in hopes of learning more for my own benefit. Please continue," Admiral Oden replied.

  ***

  The exploration lasted for just less than a day. The team, split into sections that went into different areas, found little that they couldn't observe at the other areas. Each of their reports proved similar to that of the other sections.

  The moon was very young in regards to lifeforms. Most all of those were small and relatively harmless. There were bound to be some that were poisonous to eat or handle, but aside from that there weren't any large predatory lifeforms that would threaten settlers who would probably come later. Though no specimens were captured of the wildlife, ample video recordings were made of them. One small, extremely shy, furry-looking crab that was found got labeled as a Brut Crab. Only strict Union quarantine restrictions on wildlife kept the cadet explorers from bringing him on board as a mascot and gift to Captain Vincent.

  All in all, however, the exploration was one of the most uneventful portions of the entire training voyage. The reports were filed away to be handed over later to the Navy. Meanwhile, work on the damaged engine continued to be performed at a steady pace.

  ***

  Admiral Oden retired to his quarters for sleep. He wasn't surprised when he saw that Ensign Lucille Wrigley, a female cadet, was waiting at his door. It had happened before and probably would happen again. As long as most people didn't know of his marriage, let alone his children, he knew he would continue to be approached with open offers. Such was the look of anticipation on her face that he knew instantly he was what she was after. She wasn't there for advice or any other reason. She was even ready to go, having arrived and waited while naked at his door, possibly to entice him further with what she offered.

  "Admiral, have you a boy or girlfriend?" she asked in what was a fairly common way of asking for his time.

  He knew that centuries ago, only one sex would have been asked about, there being then too much of a stigma concerning sex between two individuals of the same gender. Dave was too well read on earlier history not to know that. "Yes, Lucille, I have," he answered.

  "You do? Gosh, you're quite discreet then. I've never seen you with anyone for sex or a date," she replied.

  "That's true. I am discreet, because I don't want anyone else hurt. I don't want someone trying to get at me by harming them," he responded.

  "Then you don't play the field?" she asked.

  Dave replied, "Uh, I've only played the field for diplomatic reasons in the last fifteen years. There were times when customs, such as those of Leuion, required me to respond politely by screwing someone's daughter. Otherwise, the answer is no, I don't play the field. Sorry, Lucille."

  "I tak
e it then that you're trying to compliment me?" she asked.

  "Oh, definitely I am. If I were playing the field, I certainly wouldn't pass up an opportunity to go to bed with you. You have a stimulating mind to share conversations with and an equally stimulating body to go along with it. I'm sure that we would both be glad afterwards. However, I do have a steady and I've remained true to her except for diplomatic necessities."

  "That sounds more like you're married, Admiral. You don't have to be that true to just a steady girlfriend. Something tells me you're not going to admit you're married for fear of someone trying to harm your wife," she replied.

  "Take it however you wish. As you said, I'm not going to admit to having a wife. I wish you a pleasant evening, Lucille," he said.

  "You too, Admiral. Good night," she said before turning and walking away quite dejected and disappointed in the outcome.

  ***

  The work on the damaged engine was finished the following day. The artificial gravity was turned off when heavy equipment was being moved into place. During that time, most of the cadets enjoyed themselves while not at their jobs by playing in the weightless atmosphere of the cruiser. When the work was finished, the squadron left the vicinity of Maria and resumed its journey around the Union.

  Chapter 7

  With the final swap of crew positions, Cadet Ensign Brut Vincent found himself in the Medical Department where he was exposed daily to naked beings. His first day was an eye-opener when a petite woman walked in.

  "Hi, I'm pregnant and I want to put the embryo in suspension," she said.

  "Uh, okay. Let me find the proper entry on the terminal and we'll get you taken care of," Brut replied. "Doctor? We have an embryo suspension."

  "An E-sus? Be right there. Make sure you scrub up before we start," the doctor replied.

  Brut said, "We?"

  The doctor replied, "Why yes, you and I will perform the operation. If you're ever on a destroyer, you might have to do the whole operation by yourself. That's why we try to get as many of you trained in this department as possible. This is the most common procedure you'll be asked to perform in all likelihood. Just scrub up and I'll guide you through it. It's a snap. Make sure she's undressed and scrubbed. Assist her if necessary."