The Lady Travelers Guide to Scoundrels and Other Gentlemen

by Victoria Alexander

  “I demand to know what the two of you have heard.” Katherine glared. “I have the right to know. I am marrying into the family, after all.”

  “And I refuse to spread idle rumors that probably aren’t true.” Mrs. Fitzhew-Wellmore rose to her feet.

  “Do you really think so?” Celia asked. If indeed Henry didn’t have a fortune and his brother had financial problems, Katherine might well decide not to marry him. Henry would no doubt be fine without money—he was competent and intelligent and could certainly make his own way in the world—but Edward wouldn’t do at all well. Charming and handsome were not really marketable qualities. Poor man.

  “Goodness, dear, there’s always a grain of truth in any rumor but I certainly wouldn’t worry about your sister’s future.” Mrs. Fitzhew-Wellmore smiled at Katherine. “She is about to marry the man she loves, after all. Money is insignificant in comparison to that.”

  “Still, it is nice...” Katherine said more to herself than the others.

  “Nice but not nearly as important as affection,” Mrs. Higginbotham said. “Even a substantial fortune will not keep you warm at night.”

  Aunt Frances gasped. “Mrs. Higginbotham! I’ll thank you to keep a civil tongue in your head.”

  “Miss Quince.” Mrs. Higginbotham’s eyes narrowed.

  Celia winced. Louise looked up from her magazine. Katherine continued to study herself in the mirror, her brow furrowed in thought.

  “If you have concerns about anything I might say,” Mrs. Higginbotham began, “perhaps it would be best if I took my leave and left you to finish the difficult task of attempting to fit a dress obviously made for someone else to your niece’s specific measurements.”

  Aunt Frances paled.

  “What do you mean—not made for my measurements?” Katherine asked, her frown deepening.

  “Nothing, dear,” Aunt Frances said quickly. “The seamstress was...um...um... French, I believe. Which is why there are a few problems with the gown.” She lowered her voice in a confidential manner. “Her grasp of the English language was not as good as one would hope it would be.”

  Celia stared. Aunt Frances was far quicker and much more clever than Celia had ever realized. If Aunt Guinevere and her friends were going to stop this wedding, Katherine might not be their biggest obstacle.

  “Furthermore,” Mrs. Higginbotham continued, “if your nieces are not aware of the more intimate aspects of marriage—”

  “Effie,” Mrs. Fitzhew-Wellmore warned.

  “—then you have obviously failed in your duties,” Mrs. Higginbotham finished in a lofty manner.

  Aunt Frances clasped her hands together. “My nieces know everything it is appropriate for them to know as properly bred young ladies.”

  “Then I would say it’s going to be a most interesting wedding night,” Mrs. Higginbotham said under her breath.

  Mrs. Fitzhew-Wellmore groaned. Louise snorted back a laugh.

  “Mrs. Higginbotham!” Aunt Frances snapped.

  “Yes, Miss Quince?” Mrs. Higginbotham asked.

  Aunt Frances stared at her then drew in a deep breath. “While your candid manner of speech is not entirely my preference, your sewing skills are exceptional. This gown is far beyond my own meager abilities. I would be grateful if you—and Mrs. Fitzhew-Wellmore of course—would continue to work your...magic to make Katherine’s dress as perfect as it can possibly be.” She summoned a tight smile. It obviously wasn’t easy for her. “Most grateful.”

  “Why, I can’t think of anything we’d rather do than to help make Katherine’s wedding everything she’s ever wanted.” Mrs. Higginbotham smiled in an overly pleasant manner. “And all that she deserves.”

  Day Four

  CHAPTER TEN

  “YOU WANT ME to do what?” Gwen stared at the earl.

  Edward chuckled. “You needn’t look at me as if I’ve lost my mind.”

  “You’re asking me to hide in a cupboard.” What was the man thinking? “Rational people do not usually ask others to hide in a cupboard. Besides, I am already dressed for the ball—”

  “And might I say you look lovely tonight.”

  She ignored him. “Guests will soon be arriving and I still have a few things to take care of. Miss Quince has decided her participation is no longer necessary, so everything has fallen to me and my dear friends, who may never forgive me. Organizing balls and weddings in a grand house with a staff of dozens is not something we do routinely, you know. It has been an exceptionally long and busy day. Myriad details still need to be attended to and I don’t have time for nonsense.”

  “It’s not nonsense and I’m not asking you to hide in a cupboard,” Edward said patiently. “You’re absolutely right, that would be mad.”

  Gwen narrowed her eyes. “Then what are you asking?”

  “I have not explained this well.” Edward strode across the library to the door concealed in the paneling he had indicated a moment ago. He pulled it open with a flourish. “As you can see, it’s not a cupboard. This is my private office and it is substantially bigger than a cupboard.”

  She peered around him. It was not as large as the library but was a good-sized room. A door on the far wall probably led to the hall or another room.

  “Very well, it’s not a cupboard.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “And you’re right, you have not explained this at all well.”

  “My apologies.” He grinned. “It’s not often I participate in subterfuge and clandestine endeavors. I find it rather exciting.” He grimaced. “Which means my life has become extraordinarily dull of late.”

  “Would you please tell me what you are talking about?” Gwen hadn’t stamped her foot in frustration since her girlhood but it was hard to resist doing so now.

  “All I’m suggesting is that you stand in the office, on the other side of the door, which we will leave open a crack, so that you may hear what transpires.”

  “What is going to transpire and why do you want me to hear it?”

  “Because it’s your brilliant idea.” He beamed.

  “Which brilliant idea is that?” The day had been filled with countless minor difficulties. And each and every one did seem to require a solution that was at least clever if not brilliant.

  “Why, convincing Katherine that Henry and I are on the brink of destitution so that she will call off the wedding of course.”

  “Oh, that brilliant idea.” Gwen couldn’t resist a smug smile. It was rather brilliant at that.

  Effie and Poppy had begun what Effie insisted on calling a campaign yesterday by subtly mentioning gossip about Edward and Henry’s financial instability. Today, as they decorated the ballroom, continued to fit Katherine’s wedding dress, discussed the menu for the wedding breakfast with the cook, arranged flowers and dealt with endless tiny details, all three ladies refused to speak further of rumors or gossip or innuendo. That in spite of pleas from Miss Quince and Katherine. Gwen thought it best not to tell Celia the truth about the alleged gossip. For one thing, she wasn’t sure her niece was devious enough to carry on the charade. And for another, if Celia truly loved Henry, his fortune—or lack of it—would make no difference. Or at least it shouldn’t. Far better to find out now if it did.

  It was really quite amazing how very much could be said by saying hardly anything at all. And Gwen, Effie and Poppy’s efforts were beginning to bear fruit. Miss Quince had a decidedly pinched look of worry about her and Katherine seemed at once preoccupied, concerned and annoyed. Which no doubt explained her fouler than usual mood and tendency to bite the head off all who came near her. Of course, Gwen and her friends were becoming a bit testy themselves. Spending part of every night in a chair in a corridor apparently did that to a person.

  “And I am about to do my part. As I do think it will be a riveting performance—” he usher
ed her into the office “—I should like an audience of at least one. The play’s the thing, you know, Gwen.”

  “I wouldn’t quote Hamlet, Edward. He did not end well.” She stepped over the threshold and into the office. “Do you really think this is necessary?”

  “My dear Gwen, it’s not only necessary.” He cast her a wicked grin. “It’s going to be fun.”

  “Oh, well, as long as it’s going to be fun.” She bit back a smile.

  “You may sound chastising all you wish, but I would wager you are going to enjoy it.”

  “I’ll enjoy it more if it works.” She turned toward him. “Do you care to tell me exactly what you are planning?”

  “Absolutely not. I think it would be best if you were surprised.” He pulled the door closed, leaving it open no more than a crack. “And impressed.”

  She heard him move away from the door and settle in the chair behind his desk that creaked when he sat down. She waited for what was surely an hour but perhaps was less than a minute.

  “When do you expect whatever this is to occur?” she called.

  “Anytime now,” he said in a normal tone.

  She paused. “You’re right. I can hear very well in here.”

  “I know.”

  “How do you know?”

  He cleared his throat. “You’re not the first person to have hidden there.”

  “I see.” And wasn’t that an interesting story? She waited another eternity then called again, “I should warn you, I intend to spread rumors about your finances at the ball tonight.”

  “Really? How delightful.”

  “Delightful?”

  “In the past, rumors about me have been of a far more scandalous nature.” She could hear the grin in his voice. “This will be mild in comparison.”

  A knock sounded at the library doors.

  “Quiet,” Edward said. “The curtain rises.”

  A frisson of excitement skated up Gwen’s spine. Her life was extraordinarily dull, as well.

  Gwen heard the door open.

  “I beg your pardon, my lord,” Edward’s butler said. “Miss Bromley is here. She says you requested to speak with her.”

  “Indeed I did.” The chair scraped against the floor as he rose to greet his guest. Katherine perhaps? “Please send her in, Jervis.”

  “Yes, my lord.”

  “And when my estate manager arrives, please show him in at once. He has papers I need to sign.”

  “Yes, my lord.” Jervis hesitated. “This is entirely inappropriate, sir, but might I say something?”

  “You’ve been with this family since my father was alive, Jervis, and I value your opinion. Please go on.”

  The butler’s tone took on a confidential tenor but he lowered his voice only slightly. Gwen could hear him quite clearly, as could anyone standing behind him.

  “I just wished to ask you if you’re certain you need to take this step. Selling off much of the estate property strikes me as a drastic measure.”

  “I have given this a great deal of thought, Jervis.” Edward heaved an overly dramatic sigh. “And it is a drastic step but one that cannot be helped, I’m afraid. Unfortunately, I fear it’s just the beginning. We shall soon have to decide which of the staff we will be letting go but that can wait until after the wedding. These are desperate times.”

  Desperate times? Gwen stifled a laugh.

  “I understand, sir.” Jervis paused. “Should I show Miss Bromley in?”

  “Yes, of course. Thank you, Jervis.”

  Gwen did wish she could see Edward’s face but the angle of the nearly closed door did not permit it. A moment later she heard Katherine enter the room.

  “Katherine, my dear, you have outdone yourself. I daresay I have never seen a creature as dazzling as you are tonight. My brother is a lucky man.”

  “Thank you, Edward.” Caution sounded in Katherine’s voice. “Your butler said you wished to speak to me on a matter of some importance.”

  “Yes, I do. Please sit down.”

  The rustle of skirts indicated Katherine settled in one of the chairs positioned before Edward’s desk. Edward resumed his seat. He really should get that chair oiled.

  “I should be speaking to your father about this but as you are soon to be a member of the family, I thought it best to discuss this with you directly.”

  “Is something amiss?” Katherine asked lightly.

  “Oh, no, not really.” Edward paused for a long moment. “I find it distasteful to discuss such matters. I have no wish to cast a shadow over the happiness of this week’s wedding festivities. I’m not sure how to say this.”

  “Good Lord, Edward. Simply say what you have to say.” Katherine’s tone was a bit sharper than she had perhaps intended.

  “Very well, then.” Edward drew a deep breath. “When Henry said you and he were to be married, in spite of your father’s financial difficulties, we both expected your dowry would be substantial. We understood dowries had been set aside for you and your sisters by your grandfather.”

  “It was most thoughtful of him.”

  “Indeed it was. Regrettably, the amount of your dowry is far less than we had hoped.”

  “It is somewhat modest,” Katherine said slowly.

  “Still, it may well cover the expenses incurred this week for the ball and the wedding itself. Which is something to be grateful for at least.”

  “Is it?”

  “Keeps the creditors away for another day.” Edward uttered a harsh laugh. The man was a far better actor than Gwen had imagined. “After the wedding, however...”

  “After the wedding?”

  “After the wedding is a different story, I’m afraid.” Edward blew a long breath. “You should be aware that Henry’s fortune is, and always has been, tied inexorably to mine. And mine is...”

  “Yes?”

  “It’s difficult for a man to admit his investments have not turned out as he hoped or that his debts are exceeding his assets.”

  “Bad investments, massive debt and insolvency,” Katherine murmured.

  “It’s not quite to that point yet. Well, insolvency anyway. And I am taking steps to prevent bankruptcy,” Edward added quickly. For a moment, Gwen almost believed him herself. “Selling off property, economizing, that sort of thing.”

  “Yes, I am familiar with that sort of thing,” she said weakly.

  “Excellent.” Edward exhaled a sigh of relief. “I cannot tell you how pleased I am that Henry has found a bride well used to the modest circumstances we will soon find ourselves in. I say.” His tone brightened. “Do you know how to cook?”

  “Good Lord, no.” Horror sounded in Katherine’s voice. “We have always employed a cook.”

  Gwen pinched the skin between her thumb and first finger to keep from laughing.

  “I shall have to ask your father how he manages it. After the wedding of course. No need to sully this festive occasion with practical matters like finance and impoverishment.”

  “No need at all,” Katherine said faintly.

  “I hear there’s a woman in the village who can come in to cook once or twice a week. And I’m sure the three of us will manage quite nicely until our circumstances turn around. Which I am confident they will do. Eventually.”

  “But Henry and I will be living in Henry’s house in London.”

  “I’m afraid London is out of the question.”

  “What do you mean?” A definite hint of panic edged Katherine’s words.

  “Oh, well, this is awkward.”

  “What’s awkward?” Katherine’s voice rose.

  “Henry hasn’t told you, then?”

  “Told me what?”

  “His house in London is not as much his as it is his fami
ly’s.” Edward sighed deeply. “That house, you see, along with my residence in London, as well as nearly everything else, will have to go. However—” his tone brightened “—we should be able to keep Danby Manor. For a while anyway. So good news, there.”

  “That is...good.”

  The chair groaned as Edward obviously got to his feet.

  “I do hope I haven’t upset you but I thought it best if everything was out in the open.” He chuckled. “Wouldn’t want any unexpected surprises after the wedding day.”

  “No, of course not...”

  “Fortunately, as you and Henry are a love match, our reduced financial circumstances will be nothing more than a bump in the road of your life together.”

  “A bump in the road,” Katherine echoed then cleared her throat. “I believe our guests will be arriving shortly, so if that is all...” Her skirts rustled.

  “I can’t think of anything else. I must say, I’m glad you’ve taken this so well. Not everyone would, you know. And I can’t tell you how delighted I am that my dear brother will have someone like you by his side throughout the difficult times ahead. For the rest of your days. Until you both breathe your last.”

  Goodness, that was a bit much. But Edward was right. This was fun.

  “Perhaps you should retire until the guests arrive, Katherine. You’re looking a bit pale.”

  “I believe I shall.”

  Gwen heard the library door open and close.

  “You can come out now.”

  Gwen pushed open the door and stepped into the room. Edward stood by an open cabinet, disguised in the same manner as the door to his office, pouring two glasses of what looked like good Scottish whisky.

  “A splendid performance, Edward, simply splendid.” Gwen crossed the room and accepted a glass. “I’m assuming it was all an act.”

  “I assure you, Gwen, our finances are as sound as the Bank of England itself.” He grinned. “I was good, wasn’t I?”

  “You were indeed. As was your butler.” Gwen sipped her whisky and savored the intensity of the drink. It was an excellent quality. “Did you tell him what this was about?”