Unlucky

by Sean Donner

like someone knew too much; too much indeed, but about what? That was the question Sean had to answer.

  He had to get closer so he could hear them better, but how? “Ah ha!” Sean announced aloud by mistake, “I’ll go get a drink at that drinking fountain!”

  “Okay” answered Courtney, his next locker neighbor.

  Sean didn’t realize that he had been speaking out loud, and was visibly surprised when Courtney answered him. It was awkward. Courtney thought so, too.

  Sean walked casually to the drinking fountain that the twins were standing near and started to drink.

  “Why do I have to watch “Little Caesar” again?” Paul asked.

  “It’s Grandpa’s favorite movie and you need to get better at Rock, Paper, Scissors.” John answered, “So you get to be me and I get to play “Final Fantasy VII”.”

  Sean smiled. Making sure he was thinking and not speaking, he thought, “So, they do switch places. That’s interesting; very interesting indeed!”

  By now he had to pee and walked into the bathroom, which was conveniently located just a few steps away. The bathroom was deserted. “Yes” Sean said to himself “There will be no chance of stage fright!”

  While relieving himself, he decided to make a wish. Sean wished that he would see something that would tell him what direction to go to find the true kidnapper of his poster. He wished, and he wished hard! He thought that maybe if he wished hard enough, his wish would come true.

  After what seemed like minutes, Sean was finally at the stage in his bathroom break when he put himself back together and wash his hands. Standing at the sink, he turned on the water and put his hands under it to rinse them of. Under his breath, he began to rap. “I wish I was a little bit taller. I wish I was a baller.” Then he applied soap from the dispenser and continued, “I wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her. I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a ’64 Impala. I wish I was a little bit taller. I wish I was a baller.” He put his hands back under the water to rinse off the soap, “I wish I had a girl who looked good I would call her. I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat and a ’64 Impala.” Sean always timed washing his hands by rapping the chorus of “I Wish” by Skeelo twice. He never knew why he did this, but something about it quieted his worries of not washing his hands well enough. A little bit obsessive compulsive? Probably.

  Drying his hands on a paper towel, Sean wished one last time that he’d soon find a clue that would point him in the right direction. He walked out of the bathroom and there, standing at his locker, was Reid.

  Sean laughed, “Look who it is!”

  “Hey” Reid answered, “What are you doing tonight?”

  “I’m in the middle of an investigation, Reid. I think, I think you know that.”

  “Yeah, well, me and Brent and Julie and Marcus were talking about going to see a movie in Owatonna. You should come. You’ve been stressing over this poster for a couple days.”

  “I’ve got homework.” Sean answered quickly and bit his bottom lip as if to say, “Dang. I guess I can’t go” in a sarcastic way.

  “Well, whatever. If you change your mind…”

  “I’ll show up like I do.”

  Reid shook his head and walked slowly away. Sean made a tally mark next to Reid’s name. “Well, well, well, Reid. That’s fourteen times at my locker in two days. We’ll have a little talk tomorrow.”

  “Who are you talking to?” a voice asked from behind.

  Sean turned around. It was Ashley. “I wasn’t talking to… I wasn’t talking.”

  Ashley laughed. “Yes you were. Are you crazy?”

  Sean smiled, “I don’t have to answer that.”

  Ashley laughed again.

  “You laugh at me a lot” Sean pointed out.

  “Well, I guess you’re funny. Hey, I was wondering if you’re doing anything tonight.”

  “I was going to look for my poster, but other than that, no.”

  “You should put the poster search on hold for a night and spend some time with me.”

  “What were you thinking?”

  Ashley thought for a moment, she could tell that he wasn’t going to be any help in the planning process. “Do you like picnics?”

  “Who doesn’t like picnics?” Sean asked and he was serious. Picnics were one of his favorite things.

  “Good, then it’s a date!”

  “What time are you thinking?”

  “How about right now?”

  “Right now, right now? Like I should put my stuff away and we go?”

  “Yeah, why not?”

  Sean couldn’t think of any good reason, other than his poster, but he was quite sure that Ashley had no interest in not being able to go on a date with him because of a missing poster, and therefore, would never take it for an answer. And so, Sean opened his locker, dropped his belongings inside and shut the door.

  Turning to Ashley, he said, “Let’s go.”

  She smiled, “I’m driving.”

  “You better be” Sean replied, “My car’s broken.”

  “Oh no. I hope it’s fixable.”

  “Instead of talking about that, how about we go?"

  Ashley smiled and nodded. The two walked away from the scene of the crime, down the hall, and out of the school. They didn’t talk as they walked. Sean wondered what Ashley was thinking and Ashley wondered what Sean was thinking. Sean never liked awkward silence, although he often found himself in the midst of awkward silence. He had, however become very talented at breaking awkward silences. And so, after living through this particular awkward period of time, he decided it was best to make it end.

  “What should we eat?”

  “Um, I have a confession to make. I’m not really hungry at all. I just wanted to spend some time outside of class with you. Are you hungry?

  Sean thought for a moment. “What’s your favorite fruit?”

  “I don’t know.” Ashley paused for a few seconds. “Oranges, I guess.”

  “Let’s each get an orange and then go to the park and we can eat oranges and talk.”

  Ashley smiled. It was a big smile. It was a real smile and she knew it. “That sounds amazing.”

  The two went about their way. At the store they found two of the most perfect oranges ever. Sean paid for them. It was the gentlemanly thing to do after all, and if Sean was anything, it was gentlemanly.

  Sean was really enjoying himself for the first time since his poster was stolen, in fact, he hadn’t even thought about his poster since he left school. It was a nice break from the worry and hard thinking that the investigation had brought to him. All things, however, must end and with the realization that he hadn’t been thinking about his poster, he started thinking about the poster and therefore his conversation with Ashley became less focused.

  “What are you thinking about?” Ashley asked when she saw that something was on his mind.

  “My poster; I can’t figure out who would have taken it. I’ve got a few theories that range from ugly girls to my friend Reid to the Taliban. Most of them make perfect sense but I can’t decide which is right.”

  Ashley stopped herself from laughing, “Wait, why do you think the Taliban stole your poster?”

  “You can laugh if you want to.” Sean said seeing that she was really trying not to.

  Ashley let out a little laugh but it was all she would allow herself to do. She regained her complete composure and said, “Okay, you have to explain this one to me.”

  “Britney Spears encapsulates everything that the world sees America as, right?”

  “How?”

  “She’s rich, famous, talented, and she wears tiny clothes.”

  “Okay” Ashley answered “I can see where you’re coming from.”

  “Awesome. So the theory is that the Taliban has spies going around the United States trying to remove Britney Spears from our lives.”

  “Wow, Sean, don’t become a cop.”

  “I know it’s a long shot, but if it’s tr
ue, the government needs to know. So I’m investigating it.”

  Ashley just shook her head while Sean laid down in the grass and closed his eyes. There was silence between the two for a few minutes. Sean actually didn’t mind the silence, and so let it continue as long as it needed.

  “Are you happy?” Ashley asked.

  “Right now?” Sean questioned.

  “I hope you’re happy now. What I mean is, are you happy in general?”

  Sean thought for a while and said, “I’m happy from time to time, but I guess if I thought about it I’d have to say that in general, I’m not happy.”

  “What’s your happiest memory?”

  “The first thing that comes to mind is when I found my poster.”

  “Really? That’s pretty sad.”

  “It’s an awesome poster.”

  “Sure, but it’s a poster.”

  “Alright, what’s your happiest memory?”

  “When I was a little girl; probably four years old, I don’t think I had started school yet, I went on a walk in the woods somewhere with my parents. I remember it was a gorgeous day; just the perfect temperature, big fluffy white clouds, the leaves on the trees and the grass were just so green. Everything was so perfect.

  “We walked forever. We stopped and picked flowers along