Unlucky

by Sean Donner

Clint or Curtis, something like that.

  “Sorry Clint, I was just thinking out loud.”

  “My name’s Ben douche ass.”

  Sean dropped his head, “Ben” he said under his breath. “Ben.”

  Finally, the bell rang and Sean was free. He left the room and walked alone to his locker, opened it and dropped his notebook and pen on the stack of books at the bottom and closed the door. He had homework, but didn’t care. He was pretty sure Ashley hated him forever now and had all but given up on finding his poster. He had gotten in a real live fist fight with one of his best friends; now his other friends were going to have to take sides.

  He sat on the floor in front of his locker and held his head in his hands. He was trying to disappear. When he looked up the halls were all but empty and Marcus was sitting next to him.

  “Rough day?” Marcus asked.

  “A little bit.”

  “Did Reid really beat you up?”

  “What?”

  “That’s how I heard it.”

  “Well, I guess I was the one bleeding in the end.”

  “I can’t believe Reid beat you up over the poster.”

  “Yeah, he gave me a bloody nose” Sean used his English accent again.

  “You got yourself a bloody nose, mate.” Marcus tried it too.

  “It’s funny to say bloody nose like that. It totally changes the meaning.”

  Marcus laughed. “Want to come over to my house?”

  “Sure thing buddy.”

  The next day passed by as slowly and uncomfortably as that computer art class after his fight with Reid, who incidentally, hadn’t been to Sean’s locker since. Ashley, again, didn’t acknowledge his presence in the hallway or in class. Brent talked to him a little in Creative Writing, but not as much as usual. Julie on the other hand, gave Sean a high five the first time she saw him after the fight.

  “I didn’t start the fight” Sean explained, “I was just asking what he did with my poster.”

  “Well either way it’s awesome. Reid was complaining to Brent that he couldn’t walk because his shins hurt so much.”

  Brent laughed, “Yeah he was sitting in the commons because he didn’t think he’d be able to walk all the way to the parking lot to drive home. Then at work he made the manager get him a stool so he could sit at the cash register.”

  “I had a bloody nose, but once it stopped bleeding I forgot about it.” Sean was being tough, but it was still the truth.

  All that night, Sean thought about what Ashley had said about the poster and that she wished he’d grow up. “Maybe she was right” Sean thought. He decided that he’d probably take the “Bring It Back” sign down the next morning. The poster was stolen on Monday and it would be Friday, if it were a person he wouldn’t give up, but it was a poster. He had seen “Pee Wee’s Big Adventure” he knew just how far he could go if he kept up with his search. “The Alamo doesn’t have a basement” he repeated a few times. And so he fell asleep with the resolve to take the sign down; enough had certainly been enough.

  He was feeling a little melancholy as he prepared for school and his imminent surrender to ugly girls and identical twins everywhere, Reid and other terrorists. He felt like a proud general turning over his sidearm to an evil victorious army.

  His head hung low as he walked through the doors, entering the school. His thoughts raced as he walked the halls towards his locker. “What would ‘they’ do in this situation?” he asked himself. “I know ‘they’ have the answer. ‘They’ know everything. Who are ‘they’?”

  Sean arrived at his locker and Marcus was waiting there for him. “You’re here early.” Sean said surprised to see him. Marcus was never at school on time, let alone early.

  “Did you hear the news?”

  “Hear what?” Sean asked.

  “Okay, so this might not be true, but I heard from Brent yesterday that some kid said he saw Mr. Dahline take your poster.”

  “Really? Do you know who saw him?”

  “Brent didn’t say, but he said it was someone who would know.”

  “Snap! That’s perfect!” Sean stopped and his heart visibly sunk. “Wait, Mr. Dahline took it? How am I supposed to get it from him?”

  “I don’t know, but like I said, it might not even be true.”

  “It’s the only time I’ve heard of a witness, though. That’s got to count for something.”

  “Yeah, good luck. I’m going to femmy dance to class and listen to the announcements. Hopefully Julie says Mark Hoppus again.”

  Sean watched and laughed as Marcus femmy danced his way down the hall. As Marcus drifted from his sight, he noticed Cody Swenson walking by.

  “Cody, you owe me money.” Sean always said this to Cody and no one really knows why. Cody didn’t owe him any money and he never did. It was just one example of how Sean was loosing his mind, albeit slowly.

  Cody laughed then he got serious, “Sean, you had a Britney Spears poster, right?”

  “Yeah, why?”

  “Well on Monday I saw Mr. Dahline walking by here. He stopped at your locker and looked at the poster. Then he took it down and folded it up and put it in his suit pocket.”

  “That was you? I just heard someone saw it happen. How am I supposed to get it from him?”

  “I don’t know. I suppose you could call him out on it. I’m late for class though. I’ll see you later.”

  “Bye.”

  Sean thought about how he was going to get it back. Then he thought about Ashley. If there was anyway he was ever going to win her back, he had to forget the poster. His heart was wrenched at the thought of having to choose between the two. It was then that he realized that there was only one way to make this a win, win, win situation.

  The poster obviously had great and terrible powers if it could cause so much heartache, not to mention cause a teacher to steal from a student. Sean now knew that the poster had to be destroyed. It would cause him great pain and probably kill him in some way, but it had to be done, and he knew that it was his burden to bear.

  Sean disregarded the fact that he was already late for “Downfall of Western Civilization” and walked slowly towards the office. He could hear the announcements being read. This was the perfect time to sneak in, the office workers were busy. Then Sean laughed. “I can’t believe Julie said Mark Hoppus again! Classic!”

  He looked into the office window. Mr. Dahline’s door was open. Sean crouched so as to not be seen entering the office. Letting the door close slowly and quietly, he peered into Mr. Dahline’s office. “Good” he thought, “Dahline isn’t in there.” He crawled into the office. He had to work fast. Mr. Dahline obviously wasn’t afraid of being caught; the poster was hanging on the wall behind his desk. It was in a nice wooden frame.

  “It’s like it’s a trophy for him." He thought, "That’s creepy.”

  Sean stood up and walked to the poster. Taking the frame off the wall was surprisingly easy. As he took the poster out of the frame a voice said, “You took longer than I expected.” Sean looked up, it was Mr. Dahline.

  “I’ve been watching you, you know. I see everything. You were right about one thing, Sean. ‘They’ are really smart, but you have no idea how smart ‘they’ really are. You see, I am ‘they’, I see everything and I won’t do your homework for you!”

  “You can’t steal from me. This poster is a terrible thing and it must be destroyed.”

  “I can’t let you do that, Sean. It’s not just a poster; it’s the key to my powers. It left me on Monday morning, that’s when you found it. I didn’t steal it from you. No, quite the contrary, you, Sean, stole it from me.”

  “I will destroy it, Bill.”

  “You call me Mr. Dahline.”

  “I would call you that, if I had so much as an ounce of respect for you.”

  “But you do have respect for me, Sean. How many times this week have you referred to my infinite wisdom?”

  Sean was confused. “I’m not following you now.”
>
  “Like ‘they’ say, you’ve said that countless times. Face it, you have so much more respect for me than you know.”

  Sean dropped his head and the poster and said, “You’re right.”

  Mr. Dahline slowly approached him. “I know I’m right.”

  Looking up, Sean said, “I did respect you” and pushed Mr. Dahline over a chair and on to the ground. He turned and picked up the poster, it seemed to scream at him, begging for its life and promising all sorts of things. Sean stopped mesmerized by it. Was Mr. Dahline serious? This poster suddenly seemed alive. He knew he had to destroy it, but at this moment lacked the will and the strength to do it.

  “Now you see” Mr. Dahline said while bringing himself back to his feet.

  Sean ran past him. If he was going to do this he had to get away from Mr. Dahline. He ran right into Mr. Dahline in an attempt to knock him down again and have his escape. It wasn’t completely successful, but it did take old Bill by surprise.

  “You didn’t see that coming did you!” Sean yelled as he ran out of the office and down the hall. He didn’t stop until he got to the cafeteria where he slid across the floor and hid under a table. He stared at the poster, “Why can’t I just rip you in half?”

  He closed his eyes and tried to tear it in half. Nothing happened. He tried again, but was interrupted by the sound of foot steps coming near him. It was Mr. Dahline. He didn’t know everything, but he seemed to know most things. “Maybe he doesn’t know where I am.” Sean thought. Mr. Dahline didn’t stop walking. Sean didn’t have to wait any longer. He slid out from under the table and ran.

  “You can’t get away, Sean!” I will always know where you are.

  Sean could only think of one place to go; a place where there would be fire, shop class. “That’s in the middle of the stinky bog” Sean thought. He hesitated but only for a second. “Then that’s what I have to do.”

  Busting through the door, he scanned the room for a friendly face. “Kyle” he thought, “Kyle has always been okay with me.” The room was noisy so Sean’s presence seemed to go unnoticed.

  Mr. Dahline ran through the doorway. He walked after Sean who was halfway across the shop, and therefore halfway to Kyle, who was welding something.

  “Kyle!” Sean shouted, but Kyle didn’t seem to hear him. “Kyle!” Mr. Dahline grabbed Sean by the shoulder and pulled him away from his target. Sean swung his arm back catching Mr. Dahline with his elbow. Sean was free again.

  Sean ran the rest of the way to Kyle; sparks were falling to the floor in front of the welding boy. Turning, Sean saw that Mr. Dahline was still coming. There was no time, Sean had to act fast. The poster screamed out with all its might. Sean couldn’t believe that no one else could hear it.

  “Go to Hell” Sean said as he dropped the poster on the floor in front of Kyle. The poster immediately burst into flames. Mr. Dahline fell to the floor unconscious. Sean stumbled to a chair and watched as the class scrambled with a fire extinguisher to put out the fire.

  The poster was gone. Sean took a deep breath as the burden it had been on him lifted. Because of the commotion and Mr. Dahline lying on the floor of the shop room, Sean was able to leave unnoticed.

  Sean stumbled down the hall, past the cafeteria, past the office and to his locker. He stood and looked up at the sticky note sign that had hung there for the past week. “Bring It Back” he read, “I’m so glad it’s gone forever.”

  Brent walked up to Sean. “Dude I heard what happened. It’s crazy that the poster was evil all along. I never saw that coming.”

  “Neither did I.” Sean answered as he tore down his beloved sticky note sign. “Neither did I.”

  “What now?”

  “I’ve got to try to get Ashley to forgive me.”

  “What about Reid?” Brent inquired.

  “He’ll be alright.”

  Brent laughed, “Go get the girl, son”

  “That’s what I bloody intend to do.” Sean started down the hall towards Ashley’s locker then stopped and turned back to Brent and said, “I’m taking bloody back.”

  “From the Brits?”

  “You know it, buddy.” Sean continued walking towards Ashley’s locker, he didn’t know what he was going to say and he really had no idea what she would say but he knew he had to try something. There was still fifteen minutes before class got out, so he had some time to figure out what he would say.

  “Flowers would have been good” he thought, “I wish I had flowers. Girls like flowers and puppies. Oh, I should have brought a puppy.”

  Minutes drifted by and still he stood there at Ashley’s locker. He rehearsed over and over again different things he would say to her, but always decided that it was stupid. The time finally came for class to get out, the bell signified the release of the students and the halls immediately filled.

  “Did you hear about Mr. Dahline?” one kid said to another.

  “News travels fast around here” Sean thought.

  “Mr. Dahline is in the hospital; he collapsed in the shop room” another kid said.

  From behind him, Sean heard a voice say, “You smell like metal, burning, and I’m not sure what else; where you in the Agriculture wing?”

  Sean turned to see Ashley standing behind him. He didn’t know what to say.

  “I need to get to my locker” she continued.

  “You’re talking to me now?” Sean asked.

  “I’m not so cruel that I would give you the silent treatment forever. This doesn’t mean I’m not mad at you, and I stand by everything I said. You do need to grow up, stop getting in fights about a poster, and forget about a stupid piece of paper.”

  “I burned it.”

  “What?”

  “I burned the poster. Mr. Dahline stole it from me. I took it this morning and he chased me all the way to the shop class where I dropped it under welding sparks and it started on fire.”

  “Is that why Mr. Dahline is in the hospital?”

  “It might be.”

  “Wow” Ashley said, “That’s more pathetic than you.”

  “Thanks for that. Anyway, I came here to apologize and walk you to your next class.”

  “What if I don’t forgive you?”

  Sean was taken back. “Was this true?” he thought. “I guess there’s only one way for me to know for sure” he said.

  “Oh yeah, how’s that?”

  Before she could finish her question, Sean grabbed her by the hand, pulling her close, and kissed her. She wrapped her arms around him.

  “You forgive me” Sean said smiling.

  “Shut up” she said pulling him close again “don’t let go until I say so.”

  “What?”

  “Sorry, I’m quoting punk rock.”

  Sean hadn’t heard anything better than this in his life.

  “Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to not laugh at your “bloody” nose joke?”

  “I’m taking it from the Brits!”

  THE END

  About The Author

  Sean Donnor is a thoughtful upstart who occasionally has a beard. He enjoys writing, traveling and wearing well-tailored suits. He once bought a suit at a store that offers its patrons beverages as they shop. There are other assorted tales far more interesting about Sean that you may be interested in reading, but he hasn't quite written all of them down yet. It's called anticipation; things are so much better when you have to wait for them.