Blinne held up one finger and gave a slight giggle before going to the bedroom. Allie took the opportunity to sit at the table and take a few more calming breaths before she came back. When Blinne returned, she had a bundle of pink wrapped in her arms. She held her out and let Allie take her. Allie stared at the sleeping little doll. Blinne stepped away and began rambling on about the birth and first few days of being a mother. Allie had no idea what she was saying…she really wasn’t paying attention. She couldn’t help herself. She was in awe of this tiny person—so perfect and sweet. Sadness also crept deeper into her soul as the seconds ticked by. Sadness for what she had lost…forever.
Babies could be loved by anyone. She could be an aunt-like figure to this one…but she longed to be a mother. To feel a baby moving inside her would bring her such joy. Faintly, she could hear her name being called.
“Allie! Allie! Are you listening to me?” Blinne came and placed her hand on Allie’s shoulder jolting her back to reality. “Oh, Allie! Here, take my hankie. I’ll take her for you.”
It was then that Allie noticed her cheek was wet. She was crying. She took the hankie with one hand and kept her other wrapped securely around the pink bundle.
“Oh, my! I’d like to hold her a while longer, if you don’t mind. I’m just so happy for you, Blinne. All you ever wanted to be is right here in this house…and my arms. Does she have a name, yet?”
Blinne nodded. “We just picked it out yesterday…Lena Rose.”
“Little Lena…Lovely Lena…Lady Lena! It’s beautiful…just like she is.” Allie took the back of her finger and made little circles across Lena’s cheek.
Giggling, Blinne commented back, “Well…she will behave as a lady, but royalty we are not!”
Both girls began laughing and Allie was feeling a bit lighter. She felt her heart had opened a bit…and Lena was the cause. She could get used to this feeling—this overwhelming feeling of protectiveness and love for someone else. Maybe being around a baby is exactly what she needed to get over the loss of her own baby. Life does move on, after all. Ma’s words came back to her. But before she could dwell on them, she pushed them aside…for another time.
“How are you doing, Blinne?”
“I’m tired and sore.” Blinne gingerly sat down next to Allie. “I knew the delivery would be hard, but no one can prepare you for it. It is intense, and you can’t really come up with any words that match that intensity,” she sighed, further stressing her point.
“Well, you look wonderful! Your skin is glowing.”
Lena started to stir and make little mousy sounds.
“Thank you, I don’t feel that way, though. She must have realized I sat down. She seems to know when I start to relax. That is always when she decides that it is time to wake up and nurse.” Blinne held her hands out silently asking to take back her daughter.
Allie reluctantly handed her back over and stood brushing her hands on her skirt. “Well, what can I do to help you out then?”
“Oh, Allie! That would be such a blessing. George will be home in a while…and hungry. He’s been fending for himself for lunch, but I know it would mean a lot to him if dinner was ready.” Blinne settled herself in the rocking chair that her father brought over a month or so ago. The same chair that her mother had used to rock her little ones. “There is flour in the bin and vegetables down in the cellar. George milked Tootsie before he left this morning. I think you can find enough for a potato soup.”
“Well, now, you just sit back and enjoy Lena. I’m going to make the best potato soup you ever tasted.”
Allie fetched the ingredients and got started. Sure enough, she found what she needed with no problem. With the weather so warm, no fire was started, and she was not about to start one in the house on a day like this. Good thing there was a pit built out back for cooking outside on these hot days.
She gathered up the wood and started the fire. Thankfully this pit was completely contained. There was no risk of having an ember spread the fire. Not everyone took this precaution, she thought to herself.
Heading back inside to grab the pot, spoon, and knife, she glanced at Blinne—so engrossed in Lena she was unaware of Allie. She longed to know what Blinne was feeling, but she would have to accept that she would never fully know.
Stepping back outside, she put salt pork she’d found in the barrel into the pot to brown. Then she made short order out of cutting the vegetables and plopped them into the pot. She sautéed them for a while and finished cooking the pork before she piled it all up to one side of the pan and tilted it to let the fat from the pork run to the other side. She added flour to the pork fat to make a roux before pouring in the gift from Tootsie. All that was left was to stir it occasionally to make sure it didn’t scorch on the bottom of the pot.
Allie was hot, but at least this part was finished. The soup would take a while to cook so she decided to make some fry bread to go with it. The Indians in these parts had taught the settlers how to make it. She took flour, milk, baking powder, and some salt and mixed it all together. Then she broke off chunks and flattened them out like patties. Once the soup was closer to done, she would fry them up and they could dunk them in their soup. Not the traditional way to eat them, but she didn’t have time to make regular bread.
She wiped her brow with Blinne’s hankie and sat back on her heels. Somehow, she would move forward. She could feel herself being pulled in that direction. God was calling her to move on. Was it with Frank? She wasn’t sure yet. Going to Reno seemed like the only option. But, going alone would be challenging. She rushed into this mess and now it was up to her to fix it.
“Hello, Allie,” George boomed as he walked closer to her.
Startled, she looked up before replying a hello.
“How is Blinne doing?” He came closer, kneeling next to her.
She wiped her brow again and told him about their visit while stirring the soup. “You’re a little early from what I was expecting, but I can fry this bread up pretty fast and you two can eat.”
“Thanks for helping out. She has been so tired and I’m getting tired of fending for myself. I want her to rest, but I’m hungry. I don’t want her to know that though. She is busy, I know. And life will resume soon. Are you staying? I can go set the table.” George stood.
“You know, I think I will finish up here and leave it for the two of you. I’m sure you would like the time together and I need to get back home before this heat turns me into a puddle. Of course, the ground might appreciate that!” She grabbed the flattened dough and began frying it in the hot lard.
“Thanks, Allie. You are more than welcome to stay…but it’s your decision.” George went inside to say hello to Blinne and set the table for two.
Allie finished frying the bread and took the food inside. She said goodbye to George, Blinne and, of course, Lena. She went out the back to put out the fire. Before she began her walk home, she stopped at the trickle of a creek that ran out back and cupped her hands to wet her mouth. As she began her journey, she knew she would need to do the same from their own creek. Something needed to be done about this heat or trouble would be coming in some form. Only God knew what that would be.
CHAPTER 23
June began with no change in weather. There was some rain here and there…if you count mists. Most of the time it didn’t even dampen the ground. The water seemed to evaporate in midair and never made it to the soil. Maybe that was all an illusion, to further the intensity of the sun. Maybe it did fall all the way to the ground only to be sucked up so fast it couldn’t be seen.
The sun was once a welcoming beacon in the sky following the brutal winters. Now, it was quickly becoming an enemy of all living things. The land was turning into a desert before their eyes. Day chores were exhausting, but nights brought no rest because it was too hot. The air was suffocating.
Despite the heat that made Allie constantly want to find relief in the ever-shrinking creek, she needed to walk to town and look for some work so s
he could save enough money to get to Reno. There were only a few places in town she could try. Deer Lodge was a small but growing community. Going back to the restaurant where this whole mess started was always an option. But it would be considered only as a last resort.
Being reminded of how this all started did not sound ideal. Moving ahead with life and learning new things was more desirable. That would allow her to focus on her future, instead of reliving the past every day. Mentally making a list of places to check while taking in the majestic mountain views in the distance made the walk short.
Doc’s office would be first on the list. It was the closest to her so that made the most sense. She couldn’t forget about the pharmacy just down the street from Docs office, Powell County Post, the local newspaper, and, of course, the bank that belonged to Frank’s family. That was on her list just above the restaurant.
Frank would be there, she was sure of that. Seeing him today might not be wonderful if her day didn’t go as she hoped it would. Frank hadn’t been around since the incident with Drew. She didn’t know if he was rethinking his feelings towards her or waiting for her to recognize her feelings toward him. Well, she already knew that. She’d known since she was a silly school girl, but her life complicated matters and he didn’t need the mess that she would bring into his.
Realizing where she was, she took a deep breath and walked into Doc’s office. He was standing at his bookshelf with his back to her.
“Dr. Leman?” Allie stood with her hands clasped in front of her and her hand bag hanging from her wrist.
He turned, closing the book resting in his palms, and removed his spectacles. “Ah, Allie! What can I do for you today? Are you feeling well?”
“I’m feeling fine, thank you. I do have a couple of things I wish to discuss with you though. Do you have a moment?”
Doc was intrigued. Allie was speaking more formally than usual. Something was up, and he was about to find out. “I do. This heat is not bringing many people my way these days. Would you like to sit a spell?” He gestured towards the two waiting chairs against the wall and she obliged.
She angled towards him. “I understand that you and my father have worked something out regarding the bill from my procedure. I would like to take that burden from my family and be responsible for paying it.”
Doc sat quietly for a moment. He knew the financial strain on the family and this drought was only making that worse. Taking responsibility for oneself was honorable, but Allie had no means to provide for herself. “Allie, I’m not sure I understand. Your pa and I have come to an agreement that is suitable for the both of us. Maybe you could do something to repay him and let us handle this.”
With effort, she kept her face steady and controlled the quiver in her voice. “My family has done more for me than any should. I created this situation and I want to finish it myself. Now…I can’t pay you today, of course, but I am currently looking for some work to be able to set my life right again. Which brings me to my other topic…do you have need for anything I might be able to help you with?” Allie bit the inside of her cheek.
“Oh, Allie! You know I would be pleased to hire you, if I could. My missus helps with cleaning the office and keeping my paperwork up to date. And with patient visits dwindling down right now, my time is opening up, allowing me to take on more of what she’s been doing. I wish there was something, but…maybe in the fall? You could check back with me then, if you haven’t found anything.” Doc stood and walked back to the bookshelf to replace the book he was still holding back on the shelf. It was a signal to Allie that it was time to look elsewhere.
“Thank you for your time Doc. I will check back in with you regarding my bill when I find something.” She was already leaving as she finished the sentence.
One down, but several others remained on her mental list. Doc was one of the nicer and more understanding people in town, but that didn’t mean he was the only one who might have something for her.
Doc remained standing at the book shelf, looking out the door as Frank walked out from the back room. “Hey, Doc. I’m finished back there. I heard your conversation with Allie.”
“I suspected you could hear it. I should have told her you were there, but she caught me off guard. I feel for her—I do. I wish I could do something.”
“Let me pay her bill,” Frank blurted. Doc whipped his head up to stare at Frank. “I’m working for you for a couple of weeks so you can go on vacation. Instead of paying me all my wages, hold back what is needed to cover the bill, please.” Frank set his jaw making it clear he was not going to budge on this issue.
“You sure Frank?” Doc looked quizzically at him. “It wasn’t just a standard office visit. I can’t go into the details, of course, but it is a sizable bill.”
“I am more than sure, but don’t say anything to Allie just yet, please. I want to tell her once it is paid.” Frank stepped out through the door to see if he could still get a glimpse of Allie walking down the street.
“All right, Frank. You have a deal.” Smiling to himself, Doc walked into the back room to check on Frank’s work.
Frank caught up with Allie as she was walking into the pharmacy. He knew why she wanted money and he wished he could help in some way. He decided to follow her and see if she was having any luck. Meeting a doctor in a pharmacy shouldn’t tip her off to his nosiness, anyway. As Frank approached the door, Allie walked right past him. “Hey, Allie. How are you?”
She spun around quickly putting her facial expression in check.
“Frank! Good to see you. I’m in a hurry today. Sorry we can’t catch up. I have to go.”
He wondered why she was agitated. He didn’t push the issue, though, and further upset her. “All right, I’ll see you around sometime, then.”
Allie spun around and walked quickly off the main street and onto a side road. She needed to calm down before she went to the next business. She could understand why she wasn’t hired if there were no openings or business was down, but blatantly telling her she was a married woman and not hirable because of said marriage made her steam! How was she supposed to get out of said marriage if she wasn’t hirable because of it?
Oh…she was mad all right. It shouldn’t surprise her, though. Most of society felt that way. Her job now was to work solely for her husband and maybe take in mending, or other meaningless side jobs that paid a pittance—to assist her husband. As a married woman, working to support herself was frowned upon and, in some circles, completely forbidden. Luckily for her, not everyone thought that way. Mr. Ashton, the owner of the newspaper company, had a different view. And that was her next stop.
Walking up the steps and through the doors, she was more cautious than she was earlier in the day. Not knowing if she would be accepted, pitied, or slapped across the face does that to a person. She had Doc’s pity, giving her hope of work in the fall. That might just have been to make himself feel better, though. She was slapped across the face by Mr. Richter to remind her of her place. Would Mr. Ashton be accepting? She could only hope. Approaching the empty desk, she tapped the bell that sat on top next to a little card that read Ring for Assistance. Then she waited.
“Yes? Can I help you?” Mr. Ashton appeared out of the back looking a bit disheveled.
Allie stood up straight and tried to appear confident. “Hello, Mr. Ashton. I was hoping for a word with you, if you can spare a minute of your time?”
“Why, hello, Allie. How are you?” He gestured for them to move to his office and she followed him.
After removing a pile of papers Mr. Ashton motioned for her to sit and he took the seat directly across the desk from her. “What can I help you with today?”
“Mr. Ashton, to be frank with you, I am looking for a job. Something, anything that will pay a decent wage.” She held her breath waiting for whatever was next.
He folded his arms and sat quietly for a moment. “Your timing is impeccable my dear. I normally do not hire the gentler sex as this work can be a bit r
ough and physically tiring but, as you know, this heat has made extra work at home. My young boy employees have been called back to carry water and such to help their families. My son and I are sinking trying to do it all. Now, I know you won’t be able to do the more rigorous parts of making the paper, but I may be able to use you for some things around here. Cleaning up, running errands, and even delivering the local papers are things I think you could handle just fine. That would free up our time to do the actual writing and printing. I could only pay you about fifty cents per week to start. If you can handle the job, I might be able to do a little more later.” He leaned back in his chair and waited to see how she would react to that.
It was an offer. Not the full open arms of accepting her regardless of her gender, but still an offer. She couldn’t refuse it. “Thank you so much, sir. I would love the opportunity.” Just as she was accepting, young Mr. Ashton walked in waving a telegram.
“Just in, close to 100 fires are being reported all over Idaho and Montana. Says the cause is everything from campers, loggers, arsonists, and even the trains themselves. The U.S. Forest Service is asking for men. They need strong men they can train quickly to squelch the fires before they get too big.” He looked up and noticed Allie. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were with someone. Hi, Allie. How are you?”
“Fine thanks, your father and I were just discussing work. And, I was just accepting a position. I can see that you are busy though so, after I am told when to report, I will leave you to your work.” She stood, turned toward the elder Mr. Ashton and waited for his response.
“How’s tomorrow sound? We could use the help soon to get this place in shape. We might not always need you all five days of the week, but for the first week, we will…just to sort out all of these papers and get this place cleaned up. Paper goes out on Wednesdays, so if you work Tuesday to help with last minute items, Wednesday for deliveries, and Thursday to clean up and get ready for the next issue that would help us greatly.” He stood and took the telegram from his son.
By His Hand Page 10